Izuku Midoriya

For a while, the dorm was silent. It wasn't a particularly awkward silence, but it wasn't a soothing silence either. That silence was broken, however, when Todoroki's voice pierced through it.

"Izuku, of course not." Although Todoroki seldom spoke more than necessary, he typically spoke paragraphs to Midoriya whenever the latter vented to him. "It's not your fault. How you feel and the reason you feel that way don't define you. The mind defies logic, I guess. If I told you…someone was wealthy, smart, popular, and strong, I think most would assume that person is happy. How could they not be? They have it all, don't they? But they're not happy at all because of mental health issues. Are they a bad person?" He expelled a brief sigh and threaded his fingers through Midoriya's hair.

I get what he's saying. He's right, but it's different when I try to apply that to myself. Be thankful. Be grateful. Be honored. Izuku, he never had to give you any advice, but he always does. Every time. He's worried. You shouldn't have to lie about your feelings to him. But my feelings tell me the opposite of the advice he just gave me. I'm so lost…

In a fragile breath, Midoriya replied, "Thank you…" He inhaled shakily and pulled back from Todoroki's embrace. "I'm sorry I… I-I scared you. I'm sorry… But I…" He felt as though a boiling liquid was filling his lungs. "I feel like all I do i-is make you worry about me a-and waste your time on me. I wouldn't have to worry you anymore…if I—"

"Ending your life would be the cruelest thing you could do to me, Izuku." Unvarnished and lethal, Todoroki's words transfixed the air like a blade.

At this point, I don't even know if I want to 'feel better,' Midoriya realized. This is where everything I've worked for has led me to. Continuing on like this has to be the right way, right? If I ended it all…I wouldn't have to live like this. Knowing something's wrong with me, I want to change that, but I'm too exhausted to try. I want to die. I really do… I don't want help. I just want to escape…

Midoriya could feel his chest swelling with a conglomerate of emotion that he was unable to discern, but he was acutely aware of its presence. "I-I…" His head throbbed as his vision was torn by the tears searing his eyes. "I feel like I just mess everything up. That I've just been lucky to get to where I am. I still feel like…everyone would be better off—happier—without me." He sank back into the comfort of Todoroki's unwavering embrace.

Todoroki exhaled sharply, his breath snaking through Midoriya's hair. "What about all the people you've saved?" he calmly inquired. "You saved me, Izuku. You saved Eri. You've saved so many people. Isn't it worth it…to see them smile after all they've been through?" His voice began to melt from its frigid state. "You train so much and work so hard, Izuku. That's not luck. No one is perfect. Not you, me, or even All Might. But that's okay. It's nice to know that even the strongest people all have flaws, and we're all still human, right?" He drew back his head from Midoriya, and in the tranquil darkness enveloping them both, Midoriya could vaguely make out Todoroki's smile.

How do you…always know what to say? "I know you're right…" Midoriya chuckled, even though his livid thoughts still throbbed in his head. "Thank you, Shouto. Really, I-I don't know where I would be without you. I owe you so much. M-Maybe even too much." His heartbeat began to slow, and it soon matched the rhythm of Todoroki's heartbeat.

"You don't owe me anything," replied Todoroki in a delicate whisper. "I'm just glad you're here with me now. I…" He paused for a long, tense moment. "I love you, Izuku. I'm still trying to say that more often."

Midoriya felt a faint tinge of warmth pervade his cheeks. "Y-You're too sweet… I'm so glad to have you in my life, Shouto. Who knows where I'd be without you. I opened up a lot thanks to you, but I just feel bad that you always have to listen to me ramble on about things that are really insignificant."

"If those things are hurting you, I don't think they're insignificant. I think they're important, even though they're small when you look at them objectively." Todoroki was silent for a moment. "If we did that with everything and never dug past the surface, the roots of the bigger problems would be invisible and unknown. Sorry. I overcomplicated that." He shook his head.

"I think you should be a writer, Sho," chuckled Midoriya. "But I get what you're saying. It's just hard to look at my small problems compared to everyone else's problems that are a lot worse, but each are treated about the same sometimes. But I'm always here for you. You've always been here for me. I feel like I'm always the one rambling on about stuff, b-but you always listen, and…that really means a lot to me. So…"

Todoroki expelled a sigh of content as he gently cupped his hand over Midoriya's mouth. "And I'll always be here for you, Izuku. But I think you should get some sleep."

Yeah, you're right. I'll try. You never fail to calm me down and bring me back into a better state of mind. It's only temporary, but the fact that you're able to do it at all is something I'm so, so grateful for. But…something doesn't sit right with me about your response. I don't know what it is, but something…just doesn't feel right.