Katsuki Bakugou

Todoroki, you fucking idiot! Bakugou wanted to scream as he tore across the dormitory to reach Todoroki's dorm. Those were the two goddamn lies I believed that I shouldn't have. Fuck. Fuck!

Bakugou could remember the night when he'd returned to the dormitory after smoking outside for a bit. It was after midnight, and the interior of the dormitory was soaked in a thick layer of darkness. Yet, that darkness could not cloak the sound of something hitting the floor nearby.

"Oi?" Bakugou had called out in a gruff whisper as his hands withdrew from his pockets. "Oi." Tilting his head and furrowing his brows, he'd crept towards the sound of the thud until he made out a figure collapsed on the ground. "Shit. Oi. Oi. Tch." With a sigh, he switched on the lights, and he was met with Todoroki lying face-down on the floor.

The fuck happened to him? he'd pondered while deliberating over what to do. Wait. Is that blood? It's around his arms. It's seeping through his sleeves. Bakugou rolled up Todoroki's left sleeve, but he had not anticipated the horrific discovery he'd unraveled. Fucking hell! Christ… Those are hella fuckin' deep. Icyhot…cuts himself? That's something I never wanted to find out. He removed Todoroki's sweatshirt and began to compress Todoroki's wounds as he lifted the latter and began to rush him to the infirmary.

He's gonna need stitches for those cuts, cuz they're not gonna stop bleeding. Shit, his blood's all over my clothes. Goddammit. Don't fucking die on me, bastard. Does he just hate himself this much? No way in hell these weren't intentional. I don't know why he's cutting himself, but I ain't gonna lie: that's fucking sad, no matter how much my ego wants me to think it's pathetic. But what the hell was he doing down here? He was heading out of the dormitory. Why?

Once Bakugou had situated Todoroki in the infirmary with Recovery Girl, he lingered nearby until Todoroki woke up. He'd waited for Recovery Girl to finish taking Todoroki's vitals and conversing with him before approaching his classmate.

Now I just feel shitty for being such an asshole to him, Bakugou had lambasted himself. Did I ever become the reason he added even one more cut to his body? Dammit, I don't want to think about that shit. I don't need another weight of guilt on my back. But how was I supposed to know? Never knew…he slits his wrists.

"Care to explain yourself?" Bakugou spat while crossing his arms, but his vermillion eyes gleamed with solace.

Todoroki shook his head. "Thanks for taking me here," he sighed without emotion.

"Show me your thanks by telling me what the fuck happened."

"I'd say no, but I owe you my life. Fine. I…didn't want this. I just…had a moment, you could say. I thought I could make it to the infirmary on my own, but I couldn't."

Bakugou expelled a sigh and tucked his hands into his pockets. "What made you feel like cutting as much as you did?" His brows lowered.

"It was…just an urge I gave in to."

"That wasn't a suicide attempt?"

Todoroki kept his eyes pointed at the bed he sat upon. "No. I'm not suicidal. I just had a bad moment, and I lost control of myself. If I wanted to die, I would've stayed in my dorm and bled out there." He blinked slowly.

I can't tell if he's lying or not. I don't know him that well. Dammit. For now, I'll believe him.

"Why are you cutting?"

Todoroki flinched. "Because I… I… No. I'm not answering that."

"Tch. Fair enough." Bakugou turned on his heel to leave. "But you're gonna have to tell someone the truth. Someone you know you can confide in. Talk about it with them. If you keep bottling this shit up…you're gonna drown in your own blood. See you tomorrow, Todoroki."

I want him to know that someone else is anticipating on seeing him, ruminated Bakugou. From now on, I'll start tellin' him something like that every day.

"Bakugou."

"What?"

"Please don't tell anyone about this. I don't want an invisible scar."

"Don't tell me what to do."

"Bakugou, I'm serious."

"Tch."

Bakugou's memory of finding Todoroki with wrists slashed open was promptly repressed as he arrived at Todoroki's dorm and began beating his fist against the door. "Oi! Icyhot!" He peeled his lips back as cold sweat snaked down his flesh.

Goddammit! I'm melting this motherfucking door. Fuck! Todoroki, I thought you were doing okay. You told me Deku was your reason to keep fighting, so, why?! Just how much do you want to die?! I wasn't fucking lying when I told you this would leave us broken!

"Oi. What do you want? Hello?"

"I'm sorry. Bakugou, I can't do this."

"Oi, oi, oi… Whaddya mean?"

"I don't…want to be here."

"Hey. Don't do anything stupid. Todoroki, you're going to leave us all fucking broken if you do this. Take some deep breaths, 'kay?"

"I-I don't know…"

"Do you know the number for the suicide hotline? Todoroki, do you realize how fucking shitty I'll feel if this is the last conversation I have with you? Think about what you're really doing… Deku is never gonna heal completely if you do this. None of us are—"

"I'm sorry… I wanted to call Izuku, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I… The scars…don't fade. I… I'm sorry. I already…tore them open again. They healed a lot, but the itch never dies. The memories never stop repeating. The scars never go away. I-I… I can't take this…"

"Todoroki, you're stronger than this. Stay calm…and we'll get you some help so you can get through this, dammit."

"I'm not that strong. I don't want help like that. I… I just want to die… I-I'm sorry. Thank you for everything."

"OI! ICYHOT—"

"Goodbye, Bakugou…"