The office was too quiet for the doctor's taste. He called up all of his work until it danced in front of him and on the wall to the left. Try as he might he couldn't stop his mind from racing. Concentrating on the research was pointless as the past two days caught up to him. His eyes closed as he leaned back on his chair. "Lazarus project off."

"A curious name for your research doctor."

Len jumped. "Why can't you announce yourself like normal people?" The Vulcan raised both eyebrows. "New Testament reference; Aunt Doris would love it. You look tired."

"I am." Spock sat across from Len. He winced slightly when his hand brushed the arm of the chair. Someone not as observant as McCoy wouldn't have noticed. "I ordered Nyota back to the bungalow after her debriefing. She requires more sleep then I."

"You still require sleep. Let me see that." He reached for Spock's hand.

"I am alright doctor." His hand pulled out of the doctor's reach.

"Spock, I don't have the energy to fight you today. Please."

Spock looked at his friend. The doctor had never looked like this; or more to the point he had never seen the man like this. He put his hand on the desk. Green scabs covered three of his four knuckles. "I have not had a chance to clean them. The debriefing finished only ten minutes ago."

Len pulled a bag from his desk. He took out the tricorder and ran the wand over his friend's hand. When had he started thinking of Spock as a friend? It had happened slowly, but it had happened. The past year especially saw Jim, Spock, and him spending most of their lunches together. Seri and Nyota were close which put the two men into even more contact. Now he was almost as close to the Vulcan as he was to Jim. "There is a hairline fracture. Give me a minute." He called down to have a small bone regeneration unit sent up. It was less than five minutes before an intern came running in with the unit. The kid averted McCoy's eyes then all but ran out of the room. Spock watched the interaction, but Len scarcely noticed. The bone regenerator was placed over the green knuckles before Len sat down again. "What brings you here?"

Brown eyes looked through hazel ones. "We need to talk about what you believe the captain's chance of recovery may be."

"Why?" Spock shifted almost imperceptibly in his seat. "What went on in that debriefing?"

"Starfleet wants me to oversee the repairs on the Enterprise."

"And what else?"

"There is nothing else they want at the moment doctor."

Len ran his hands through his hair. He had been doing that a lot the past couple of days. "So, let me translate. If Jim doesn't make it, or if he doesn't completely recover, you are the new captain of the Enterprise."

The two men were silent for a few minutes before Spock spoke. "Yes."

"Have you told Nyota?"

"No. I came here first. I needed to speak to you."

The first time he saw the Vulcan was at the hearing to separate Jim from the Academy. Then there was the incident on the bridge when the Commander almost killed Jim. In the years since then the two had started to understand each other. Now they were friends. It happened slowly, almost imperceptibly, but it happened. Because of this Len could hear the pain in his friend's voice.

Vulcan's weren't supposed to show emotions. The past couple of days threw that out the window. Len had learned to read Spock. Until now it was subtle changes in his eyes or the tone of his voice. Now there was little to no subtlety between them. "It's alright Spock. If I can't do this, they need you." He half smirked. "It is the logical choice."

A ghost of a smirk quickly passed over the Commander's lips. Only Jim or Len would have noticed it. "Thank you, doctor. Sometimes logic is not enough."

"I won't tell your father you said that."

"Please do not tell anyone. Nyota knows, but Leonard…"

"I understand Spock. If it helps, I think you are the best choice. I don't know if I can go back, not if Jim doesn't come through this."

"I understand. It would be hard to serve under another captain." Spock knew Len didn't like taking his orders. It would be worse if he was his commanding officer.

"No. Fuck." Len stood up and started to pace. "I don't… it's not you Spock. It's me. I'm trying to hold this together; I'm trying to hold together. If this doesn't work, I don't know if I can do it."

"I know I have said some things in the past, but I have always admired your scientific abilities. Doctor, if you cannot make this work, I believe there is no one who can."

"Thank you, Spock. I won't make any decisions without talking to you first." Neither man could see the future; could see how future events could bring them even closer than they were at that moment. "Go get some sleep. Nothing will change for at least a day. Mama will want us all to have a good dinner."

With that Jo came walking through the door. "Uncle Spock!" She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him on the cheek.

"Hello Joanna. Have you been to see your uncle?" Spock not only came to expect her hugs and kisses, he enjoyed them; though he would never admit it. His mother would have loved the little girl.

"Yes. I told him all about the new foals. When he is better, he and I can go riding again. I also told him about the ballet I'm in next month. It's my first year en pointe and if he is better, he can come. Will you come?"

"Yes, I would be honored." She kissed his cheek again.

No matter how happy she seemed, Len could tell his baby had been crying. She wanted them to see her as strong, and for now he would give that to her. "Baby, why don't you go back with Uncle Spock. I have a few things to do, and grandma is going to want you cleaned up before dinner."

"Alright Daddy. When will you be home?"

"I have some work that I need to do, then I'll come." Spock stood to leave, as Len came to his little girl. "I love you Turtle, never forget that." With that he kissed her forehead and left his office with them directly behind. The duo went to the elevator as the doctor went to the captain's room.

He hadn't had much time alone with Jim. The alone time had only been a few minutes here and there. Usually there was someone else with him, an assistant, a nurse, another doctor. "Door locked authorization code McCoy2566alpha."

"Authorization accepted. Door locked." The computer's voice wasn't as pleasant as the one on the Enterprise. This one had more of a nasal tone to it.

The rain beat on the windows. Len was glad Jim's windows looked over the untouched green. He could see the orange bridge and if he looked through the trees, he could see the bungalows. The lights were on only in one. It meant Mama and George had invited everyone over for a big family dinner. Kat, Jaz, Owen, and Rory would all be there by now. Sarah would have Jake making sure the table would fit everyone. Knowing her she had the men take the dining table from the other bungalow to make this dinner special. He couldn't face them. He couldn't face the noise, but more than that he couldn't face the stares. Maybe the stares were only in this mind. But it didn't matter to him they were there; reaching, mocking.

Long fingers traced the droplets as they trailed their way down the icy glass. "The rain looks cold. You used to tell me that during the winter rains on the farm. I remember you said it should snow at Christmas not rain. When I reminded you, we were in Georgia you told me 'at least the rain looks cold'. Then the next day you rented a snow machine and gave us a white Christmas."

Len turned his attention away from the window. He walked to the tube, checked the readings on its panel then looked inside. "You know I understand why you did what you did. God, I just wish there was another way. Jim, I'm scared. I'm not ready. I know you would tell me I can do this, but I don't know if I can." Jim looked peaceful; the opposite of what McCoy was feeling. "You used to joke that you would die before me. I was hoping we would test that theory when we were old men."

His hand ran over the cryotube window. The times Jim was hurt Len would run his fingers through the kid's hair. That usually relaxed Jim enough to get him to fall asleep. He wished he could do that now. "The serum should be ready tomorrow late in the day. I won't leave you once I administer it. I'll start bringing you out of stasis as soon as it is circulating. I won't take you out too fast, but as soon as I can I'll get you out of this thing."

He went back to look out the window, again placing his hands on the cold glass. The rain pounded harder against the pane. Lightning struck; the kind of lightning that a person would swear worked like an x-ray. If he didn't know better, Len would have sworn he could see the bones in his hands. "I told Jo she couldn't be here once you were put on life support. I know you wouldn't want her to see you like that. I'll let her come here tomorrow. I know she wants to be with you. One day, maybe she'll know how much she owes you. I owe you…everything. Jimmy, I promise I will do my best to be the man you have always thought I was. I'll get you through this. Then we'll all go home."

There was a knock at the door. Len went to the door. He didn't want anyone he didn't know in the room. "Unlock door authorization McCoy2566alpha."

"Authorization code accepted. Door unlocked." He needed to have that voice reprogramed.

The door opened to Rory holding a plate of Mama's chicken and dumplings. "You need to eat, and Aunt Lena insisted I take you food. She is coming over in a couple of hours. She said something about you not taking care of yourself."

Len looked the man over. He had that look he got when he was fixated on doing something. There was no point in arguing with him when he looked like that. "Come with me." They walked to the doctor's office. Both men sat at the desk. "Roar, I don't know if this will work. The tribble, I only injected platelets into the tribble. This is different. I pulled the platelets out, put them into a base serum and injected them into Chuckles. This is different, I added proportions of red and white blood cells to the platelets before combining them with the base serum. I hope I got it right."

"You need to stop it."

"Stop what?"

"Being Lenny. Now it's time to eat. You can worry later." Len smiled. Rory could always cut to the heart of the most pertinent issue at hand. Right now, that issue was the doctor did not have enough fuel to keep going.

"Then what? I don't want to leave him alone."

"You won't be leaving him alone. I'm here, then Aunt Lena, then Jaz, then Sarah, then Jake, then George, then Owen, then… you get the idea. Kat revised the schedule. The family has this all taken care of; that's why we're here."

"Is that the only reason?"

"You know it isn't. We all do better when we're together. Your fiancé knows that better than you do."

"No, I just hate to ask."

"Because David would have told you that you weren't good enough to do things. I remember the asshole."

"I guess. Cuz, this is not like anything I've done before."

"Kinda like when you joined Starfleet. But I guess that didn't work out. If you try really hard you may make CMO on the Auckland or maybe even the Bradbury."

"Smartass. How long are you here?"

"As long as you need me." Rory wished his cousin's smile wasn't morose. He missed the days when they were kids grabbing frogs and snakes at the creek on the Perettis' farm, throwing Tucker into the pond before jumping on horses and riding to town. "You look like hell."

"Thanks, and this is after sleep and a shower."

"That's great. Why don't you finish dinner? I'm sure you don't need the circus that is dinner. They should be cleaned up soon. Sarah has it all under control. It should be safe to leave after you eat. I'm sure it will be a lot calmer by then."

Len picked at the plate. Usually this was one of his favorite meals, but now he could barely taste it. "I don't want them to stare."

"What?"

"Stare, I can't handle the stares." He stabbed at one of the dumplings.

"Do you think I am starting at you?"

"No. They want me to have all the answers. They expect me to fix this."

"Do they? Or do you?"

"A little of both." Len concentrated on the food. He didn't want to look up at Rory.

"I think expect is the wrong word. I think you're still exhausted. Go back, say hello to everyone, then crawl under the covers with that stunning fiancé of yours and lose yourself before getting some sleep. I may not be a smart as you."

That made Len look up. "Don't ever say that. You are as smart as me, smarter sometimes."

"I don't agree." McCoy narrowed his eyes as he continued to stare at his younger cousin. "Alright, be that as it may, I do know this. You need to take some time for yourself, before the ride begins. You have no idea how long things might take and you could be going for weeks."

"You're right. See, I told you, you were smart." Len hated it when Rory put himself down. "I'll go as soon as I'm done. Promise me you won't leave him alone."

"I won't." Len finished dinner and walked with Rory to the door. "You will need this." Rory handed him the raincoat he had been wearing.

"I'll send it back with Mama. If I haven't told you, I really do love you, asshole."

The two men hugged. "I love you too, but don't tell anyone." They left the room Roar headed to Jim's room. Len watched as he showed his I.D. to the guards before being let in. The lift arrived shortly after the button was pushed.

Cold, stinging rain beat on him as he walked slowly across the campus. Thank God Rory had given him the rain coat. The lightning had stopped, but the winds had picked up. By the time he arrived at the bungalow he was soaked from the waist down. The front door opened to a peaceful scene of the entire family enjoying each other. George made his way over. He held his son as Len let the days tension fall on his "father" in the form of silent tears.