The sun streamed into the bedroom. "Shit." Len reached over to an empty side of the bed. Seri must have relieved her dad at the hospital. He flopped onto his back and stared at the ceiling. Soon he would have to go out to a house full of people with questions, questions to which he didn't have answers.

There was a light knock at the door. "Pumpkin, can I come in?"

He threw on underwear before he unlocked the door. "Come in Mama. Give me a minute." He walked into the bathroom, closed the door, relieved himself, then brushed his teeth. It wasn't long before he joined her at the bottom of the bed.

Lena looked him over, head bowed, hands clasped on his lap. "We haven't had any time to talk baby."

"I know. I have been a little busy."

Gently she guided his chin until they were looking at each other. "You look like hell."

"Thanks mom." He stood up and began to pace in front of the bed.

"I understand what you're feeling."

"No, no you don't. And I know you talked to dad; sorry, Uncle George."

"Dad's fine. I have, but I also know you. You don't have to be perfect. You don't have to be God." She wanted to push his buttons. One thing Lena knew was her son needed to show his anger. He had shown his fear and pain, but the anger was what was tearing at him.

"YES, I DO! I HAVE TO FUCKING FIX EVERYTHING. IT'S ALL ON ME. THE GREAT DR. MCCOY, HE CAN DO IT. SEE LOOK, HE CAN FIX DEATH." It hit him that he was screaming at his mother. When he finally looked at her, her face hadn't changed. She as calm as she had been when she walked into the room. "Christ! I'm sorry Mama."

"It's alright."

"No, it isn't. I'm not angry with you."

"But you are angry."

The realization hit. It was what he had been fighting since he put Jim in the tube. He pushed down the pain and fear, but he fought the anger. "I guess so."

"Get dressed. It's just us. Ben, Hikaru, and Joce took the girls to the park. They said something about hot chocolate. As bad as it is, they want to make things as normal as possible. Demora is starting to wonder what happened."

"She shouldn't see it."

"We all agree on that. I'll meet you in the breakfast nook." Lena left Len to dress.

She had poured two cups of white tea. The last thing her son needed was caffeine, no matter how much he wanted it. Len was pulling his medical shirt over his head as he made his way to the table. He sat down in front of the large blue mug. "White tea?" Her eyes smiled over her cup. "You used to make this for me when I was upset."

"Some things never change."

"Some things do." He took a sip. "What do you want me to tell you."

"Nothing. It is more about what you need to tell yourself."

"And what would that be?"

"That it's okay to be angry."

"Even if it is with him? Even if ultimately, he did the right thing? He did you know."

"I do. I know he saved Scotty before going in."

"Yeah." Len's smile was sad as he looked into his cup. "Mom, I'm so angry. He doesn't think and he lands into messes. I can't always fix things you know?"

"I know. Do you think that Jim just rushed in; that he didn't think?"

Thank God the cup was thick or he would have shattered it as hard as he was holding on. "No, he thought. He thought about everyone but himself. I could feel how scared he was after he came out of the chamber. I couldn't get to him. Spock was there, so were Nyota and Scotty, but I wasn't. He died scared and I wasn't with him. He…" McCoy didn't know what to say. Was he angry? Yes. He was angry that Jim left him and he wasn't there to be with his brother at the end. He was angry that the choice had to be made. He was just angry.

"Can I tell you a few secrets?"

"Sure."

"You may not know this, but you are human."

"I'm well aware."

"What you might also not realize is that humans get angry for no real reason, but it is normal. I won't bore you with why this happens, but it does."

"I don't want to hate him."

"Do you?"

Len was almost silent. "No."

"Good. The misplaced anger will fade, but you already know that."

"Yes. Mom, what if I can't do this?"

"Then we will get through it."

"My second fucking failure."

"Leonard Horatio McCoy, don't say that. I'll give you the divorce, though I have to admit you and Joce have made more of a success of you divorce then you did of your marriage. If this doesn't work it doesn't mean you failed."

"You can remind me of that as we stand over his grave."

"Don't do that. Don't bury him before he's dead."

"I'm trying not to do just that. Everyone looks to me for the answers and I don't have any fucking answers, just like with Spock's sight. Sorry, do you know about that?"

"Yes, Jim commed me when it happened."

"I missed it. I thought he was blind because I messed up that part of his physiology in my mind. I missed it."

"Will you make that mistake again?"

"No. Jim tried to tell me it wasn't my fault, but it was. What if I missed something this time?"

"This is all new ground. I know you; you go over everything in your mind every time you close your eyes or look out a window. Am I right?"

"Yes. I do go over things. Seri and Jaz say they can feel him."

"Then hold onto that. Lenny, I'm not going to be your therapist."

"Thank you for that."

"But I am your mother. I know you're angry and hurting. I know you're angry with him, and I know you're angry with yourself. Don't do what you usually do."

"And what is that." For a moment Lena heard her late husband's voice. She wouldn't allow her boy to fall down that hole and become the bitter and hateful man his father had been.

"Wall yourself off, try to take care of everyone but yourself. Talk to me, talk to George or Jaz. I know you don't want to bother Seri or Cal, but they want you to talk to them. Joce isn't here because of Jo, at least not primarily. She is here for you. Do you think we could have kept Jake and Sarah away?"

"Jake is here for Jim." He was staring at his mug.

Lena put her hand over his. "He was going to stay behind to let Evan come, but Evan knew Jake needed to be here. He is here for you as much as Jim. We are here for you. Even Jo said you would need us." She could see him trying to process what she was saying. "You're a great doctor. I saw that in the way you thought, even in school. Your grandparents were proud of you. Granddad used to say that you were the most instinctual surgeon he had ever seen. Grandmom was proud of your scientific abilities. She loved your curiosity and ability to take that curiosity into the lab."

"They never told me. They told me they were proud of me, but I thought it was only because I was their grandson."

"I know. They were proud of you in ways I doubt you'll ever know. Before you ask, they were proud of some of their other grandchildren, but you were always their favorite. Len, you really are exceptional. If you can't do this, I doubt there is anyone who can. I know about Spock's site, but that just proves you are human."

"I don't get that luxury."

"Yes, you do. That is why we are here. I noticed Christine Chapel in Jim's room. If I remember correctly, she is one of the best in her field."

"She is. She is staying at the hospital to help Jim."

"She is staying to help you. She trusts you but she knows no one can do this alone. Do you know that?"

"To a point. Ultimately, I am alone on this. No one else can know where to go."

"I that respect yes. As far as the rest goes, how things are looking in the present, small things you need, lean on those around you. Trust those around you to help where they can so you can concentrate on things only you can do."

Len smiled at his mother. "I get it. And before you ask, I'm not as angry anymore."

"See you still need your mother."

Len got up, walked around the table, and kissed the older woman on the top of the head. "I always need you. But you knew that. I have to go to work."

Lena call over her shoulder as Len opened the door. "I'll bring lunch when I come over for my shift." She wanted Len to fall into a routine. Her making him lunch every day would be a start. There were times her oldest worried her.

The walk to medical seemed to get longer as the days moved one into the other. Lena had been taking the lunch shift every day. She would bring everyone food and determine their psychological well being over the meal. Carol was doing well, though her father's culpability played in the back of her mind. She had been talking to Lena. Christine was exhausted, but wanted nothing more than to be of help. Cal was still nervous, but her exhaustion was taking over. Seri was trying to hold it all together but she had been working too many hours to keep it up much longer. Jaz would try to send her home, but she always wanted to stay just a little longer. Her 'little longers' were getting longer and longer with each passing day. Both she and her father said Jim had memories running in his head. Periodically they would be able to decipher what he was dreaming.

Then there was her boy. He was more exhausted then she had seen him, even his residency hadn't been this bad. Suddenly Len jumped up. He ran to the readout wall, put in a few commands, then went to Jim's bed. Lena startled. "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, Christine come here. I want you to look at this. Are you seeing what I'm seeing?"

Chris put down her sandwich and joined Len at the wall. "Should we pull him off of support?"

Cal jumped up and ran to Jim. "No, don't give up. Please Len, I'm not ready."

Len forgot she was there. He held Cal as she cried. "Fuck. Baby I'm so sorry. No, it isn't that. The readings show he might be able to breathe on his own. We are going to try. You don't have to be here."

Seri walked over to Cal. "Why don't we stand over here? We can watch and not be in the way." Gently Cal was led over to her mom. The two ladies kept their arms around the trembling woman as Len shut off the ventilator.

Christine watched the readings. "There, look. He can do it."

"You're right. Look there. Let's extubate and see how it goes." Before he even started his last sentence, Chris handed him the tray. He removed the tape then carefully pulled the tube out of his best friend. This would tell him how far they had come better than any readings on a wall. They both let out the breaths they were holding when they realized the patient was breathing on his own. Two weeks had passed without much change, but now he was breathing on his own.

Cal took a tentative step towards the bed. "That is good, isn't it?"

Len came over to her. "It is definitely good. He has a way to go still, and I'm not making any promises, but at least he has come this far."

Cal took Jim's hand. It was warm. He was still there. "I think I'll stay."

Len took a good look at his sister. He would let them stay for now, but she and Seri needed to sleep. "Peaches, I'm giving you and your dad the night off." Seri started to protest. "No, I need you all in top form for later."

"Alright, but we will be here bright and early in the morning."

"Not before ten. I want you both truly rested. Can you tell Joce she can take Jo here after dinner?"

"Sure, aren't you coming with us?"

"I have some things to do. Don't worry, I'll rest." She looked at him through slitted eyes. "I will."

"Alright. It won't do any good to argue. I know when to give up." She walked over to Jim, trying to connect with him, to have him hear her, have him communicate with her.

"Cal, I want you to go back with Seri. You look like hell."

"So, do you."

"I'll get some rest."

"Liar."

"I will, later." Len walked over to his mother. "I really need those two to get a good night's sleep."

"When was the last time you had a good night's sleep Pumpkin?"

"I'm fine."

"Not an answer to my question. Don't worry, I'll let it go for now. I'll make sure Joce knows. Jo can't wait to see her Uncle so they will probably be by later."

At 17:00 Len called down for a dinner tray for him and sent everyone else home. He promised Chris he would call if there were any changes. Nothing had changed. He looked over the readings, they weren't what he had hoped for after the extubation. The blood counts were still too low, and where the O2 saturation was good, his blood pressure was a little low for the doctor's liking.

He ate dinner, but didn't taste any of it. Joce called, she would be heading over with Jo. He told her he didn't need anything and that it was good for jo to see her uncle. Joce could tell something was off, she just didn't know what.

Len met them in the hall outside of the isolation room. Joce's look turned from trepidation to concern the minute she saw him. Jo looked scared; she had never seen her father like this. The last time they had been there Jim was still in the cryotube, and Len hadn't looked like he had been through a war. "Donkey?"

"He's alive. I don't know much more than that. I tried…Joce I am trying. I think I got it right, but I'm not sure if, or when he'll wake. I don't know what else I can do." The words came out in rapid fire. He was exhausted. The lack of sleep was taking its toll. He had forced Seri and Cal to go back to the bungalow, but he hadn't taken his own advice, and it showed.

"Jo, sit here while I talk to Daddy." She led the girl over to a line of chairs opposite the door to Jim's room. Jo followed her mother's instruction, but her eyes didn't leave the frosted glass in the door. "Len, let's go over here." She led him to the on-call room a few feet down the hall. Gentle hands guided him to the bottom bunk. He sat while she leaned against the desk across from him.

"I should get back. He could wake up." He tried to stand but she blocked his way.

"No, you need to lie down. You look like hell, and I don't think you have enough strength to fight me on this."

"Joce, please; I need to do this."

"What, fall over? Because Donkey that's where you're headed. Let me give you a hand." She knelt in front of him and started to remove his shoes. She was right, he didn't have the strength to stop her. "When was the last time you really slept?"

"I don't know, yesterday or the day before. Please don't tell Seri. I've been blocking her. She passed exhausted a couple of days ago."

"So, did you, and killing yourself isn't going to help anyone. Please Len, you need to rest." She was begging him. Len had never heard Joce beg; it wasn't her style. She would order or ask, but never beg.

"Do I look that bad?"

"Well, I don't think you're part racoon, but your eyes look like you are. And you're paler than usual."

"That's because I've been on the ship."

"No baby, it isn't." His head was hanging down. She brushed the side of his cheek with the back of her hand, pushed the hair back, and kissed his forehead. "Lie down. I'll make sure they come get you if there are any changes."

"Please make sure he isn't left alone. He's alone now, I don't like that." The doctor turned to put his head on the pillow. Joce took the blanket from the top bunk and placed it over him.

"I'll make sure." She ran her fingers through his hair until he fell asleep. No matter how upset he got that simple act always helped him relax. Evan was coming on the shuttle that night. She knew Len needed his support. Years before they had talked about not fucking up their divorce. It seemed to Joce they had managed to make it work. It wasn't long before his breathing changed and she knew he was asleep. The light was turned off and the door closed as she left the room.

They had left Jo on the chair outside Jim's room. Joce didn't want her to see her dad looking as defeated as he did. When she looked at the chairs, they were empty. "Jo!" She knew her daughter hadn't gone far, and the imp couldn't leave the building without someone stopping her. Everyone that worked in the building knew what Dr. McCoy's daughter looked like. She spent a lot of time there when she visited her dad at the Academy, and the older she got the more she looked like him. When she visited, she would roam the building. One day he found her in the morgue learning about the structure of the brain.

Joce didn't go far before she realized where the little one must have gone. She opened the door to Jim's room. What she saw brought tears to her eyes and she had to step out to compose herself. Jim was Jo's best friend; that was what the young girl told her friends at school. He was her Uncle Jim and he would always be her best friend. Joce didn't dissuade her from feeling that way. It was healthy for her to have good adults in her life. He had been a strong influence over her almost from the day they met.

Jo watched her parents walk into the on-call room. She could feel how tired her dad was. She could feel something else, but she didn't know what it was. Adult feelings were hard for her to understand, though her granddad and Aunt Seri were helping her. She knew they would be awhile and she started to become restless.

Her uncle was out of the cold tube and in a bed on the other side of the door. Her dad didn't want her there when Jim was on life support. Now the ventilator was gone and she was allowed to see him.

She kept an eye on the on-call room door as she opened the door to the isolation room and slipped in. The lights were on low. To her left was a screen with all of her uncle's vitals displayed. It took up most of the wall next to the door. Jo wished she knew what all of the numbers and the squiggly lines meant. There was a cart on the other side of the bed with a smaller screen on it. She recognized his heart and respiration rates, but that was all.

The sun had set less than an hour before and any vestige of natural light vanished with it. Jo looked out of the windows next to Jim's bed. There were trees in the yard that were barely visible in the lamplight. Beyond the yard was the bay. The lights of the city reflected off the water. Years before her uncle had taken her to the bridge, a thick fog had almost completely covered it. He showed her the gardens that had been recently planted at the base of the orange structure. They talked about how they resembled the gardens on Betazed. He taught her how the cables held and distributed the weight of the structure and how it allowed for the bridge to be as long as it was.

Jo turned to the bed. Her uncle wasn't just one of her favorite people, he was her best friend. She adored her dad, mom, stepdad, grandparents, other uncles and aunts, but they weren't like her Uncle Jim. She could tell him the things she didn't want to share with her parents and she knew she could trust him not to say anything. If he thought it was something they should know, he always managed to persuade her to tell them herself. He kept her safe when they went for rides into town and made sure she ate her vegetables before he would take her to the ice cream parlor. He was her Uncle Jim before he was Captain Kirk.

Starfleet had told the families that death was possible; they held classes for them, but they didn't prepare her for this. She slowly climbed onto the bed. His hand felt warm as she held it in hers. It was all wrong, he was warm and his color was better than her dad's, but she couldn't feel him. She could always feel Uncle Jim, but this last two weeks she couldn't no matter how hard she tried. She couldn't feel anything. He wasn't dead, but he was. There was nothing there.

Jo moved up the bed and put her head on his chest. She closed her eyes and listened to the sound of his heart. When Jo was scared, Jim would hold her to his chest and she would listen to his heart as he calmed her. She remembered the night she was scared because her dad was yelling at her Aunt Ginny. When Jim held her, she could hear his heart and it made her feel safe. Only her dad could make her feel safer.

Now he wasn't there. "Uncle Jim, I'm here. Remember when you told me you would always keep me safe? Now I'm going to keep you safe. You aren't allowed to leave me. You aren't. Please stay, we need you. I need you. Daddy told me what you did. I know you saved his life and Aunt Seri's. But I don't want you to leave me. Please Uncle Jim, don't go. Don't go." She closed her eyes to a torrent of tears as she laid sobbing on her Uncle's chest. She didn't hear her mother open and close the door. She didn't feel her uncle lightly squeeze her hand.

Joce let her daughter have a few minutes alone with her uncle before she walked to the bio-bed. She rubbed her baby's back a little, then gathered the little girl into her arms. "Your daddy is working hard to fix your uncle."

"But what if he can't?" She was still crying.

"That is a possibility, but we will deal with that if the time comes. Until then, he is alive and he is here."

"I can't feel him. Mommy, I can always feel all of you. But now I can't feel him."

"Your Aunt Seri, and Granddad can. When she gets back, you should talk to her." Jo had calmed down. Joce was a good mother. She knew her daughter. Jo would never have responded to her if she treated her like a toddler. Joce treated her with respect, but kept the conversation on the level of a twelve-year-old. At times Jo was twelve going on thirty, at other times she was just twelve. "Do you want to go lay down with your daddy? I can stay with Jim."

"Please, please Uncle Jim. You promised. Don't forget, you promised me." Jo released Jim's hand and kissed him on the cheek before she followed her mother into the on-call room. Len had turned in his sleep so his back was to the room. Jo crawled over the bottom rails of the bunk and snuggled in between her father and the wall. Crying had tired her out. Here she felt safe. Instinctively Len put his arm around his baby and pulled her to him. "Good night mommy."

"Good night Jojo." Joce left the room and went to Jim. She pulled the antigravity chair closer to the bed, grabbed a pillow and blanket from the closet and settled in for the night. No matter what happened, Jim wouldn't be alone.

Joce got comfortable and put the blanket over herself. Jim looked peaceful, not the way he usually looked while sleeping. The summer she met him hadn't truly prepared her for how big a part of their lives he would become. Now she couldn't picture their lives without him. "Damn it, Jim." She stood up and moved to the side of the bed. His hair was hanging ever so slightly over his forehead. She brushed it back. "There, that's better." The mattress dipped as she sat down. "This is a hell of a lot different than the day we met. Though, Len looks as bad now as he did then. I think I introduced myself as the bitch of an ex-wife. You were nice enough not to agree."

She picked up his hand and began to trace the veins on its back. "I need to tell you something. I'm pregnant. I just told Evan a few hours ago. I haven't told Len yet. You know him, he'll worry. I'm only a couple of weeks along. According to Gwen's scanner, Jo and Crystal are going to have a little brother. Evan and I wanted you and Cal to be his godparents, so you are going to need to wake up. Pavel is babysitting Crystal. That should be the best birth control ever. Don't worry, I showed him how to change a diaper, and give a bottle. I made Len go to sleep. He was getting ready to fall over. The bungalows at the farm are being expanded. Jake and Evan think they should each be a minimum of two-thousand square feet. They finished the renovations and expansions on our house and on Sarah and Jake's. I think you'll like what they did."

The fingers of her right hand ran down the side of his face. "That's not good. You need a shave." She pushed the button for the nurse's aide. In a few minutes a boy, he was too young to be called a man, came in. "Hello, I need a basin, razor, and shaving cream, please."

"Ma'am, I don't think you are authorized to be in here alone. You will need to leave now."

Joce rarely used her full name, but this seemed as good a time as any. "I'm Dr. Jocelyn McCoy Love. If you have any questions, you can wake up Dr. McCoy and ask him. Try not to wake our daughter when you do."

The kid swallowed hard. No one in medical ever wanted to anger Dr. McCoy. He frightened the younger personnel on a good day, and this definitely wasn't a good day. "I'll get you a shaving kit ma'am." He scurried out of the room like a mouse when you opened the barn door.

It took him less than three minutes to come back with the kit. He had even put warm water in the basin and supplied a fresh towel and washcloth. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Let me know if you need anything else Mrs. Love."

Joce took the washcloth, wet it, and wiped Jim's cheeks and chin. "Lights 100%. I know, but that was a little fun. I hate when they get snotty. How would I have gotten in here without a badge, honestly. At least I didn't make him call me doctor when he said Mrs." She put the shaving cream in her hand then applied it to his face. "Don't tell them, but Len and Spock were right. I'm glad I got the doctorate." Slowly she began to shave him. "It made me feel better about myself. Len never said anything, hell none of you did, but I always felt inferior. I know, I know, I wasn't, but I still felt that way. Sometimes I still hear my parents in my head. Anyway, it was nice sitting through the classes with Sarah. Now we both qualify to be museum curators or professors. Mama, George, and Jaz have us cataloging the entire McCoy and Highland Enterprise collections. Plus, we have been acquiring some nice pieces. Sarah got a piece just for you. When we get home, I'll show you."

Joce stopped. "You have to wake up. Jo says she can't feel you, but I know you're still with us. Seri and Jaz say you are." She finished shaving him and gently rinsed his face. The towel was softer than she had expected. "There, now you look like you. This is the most time we have had alone since the wedding. You did a beautiful ceremony. I know, Aunt Doris wants you to be ordained, but I'm happy the Counsel said you could do the ceremony as Captain. One day you may have to do what Aunt Doris wants or she'll never leave you alone. The town is still talking about that day. The old biddies can't get past Len walking me down the aisle. They don't understand our kind of love. You know how much I love the both of you. I don't know what I would do without you both in my life. I need you." She took the tub with the shaving kit to the bathroom. The water was dumped into the shower area before the kit was put into the tub. Joce placed it under the sink. As she stood up, she caught her reflection in the mirror. Fuck, she looked almost as bad as Len.

The room was quiet except for the beeping of the monitors. His covers were fixed before she kissed him on the forehead. "You don't get to leave, not yet." She kissed him again, sat back in the chair and put the covers back on. "Lights off. Good night kiddo, I love you." It wasn't long before Joce fell asleep.

A large hand gently squeezed Joce's shoulder. As her eyes opened, she could see the tangerine hues the sunrise cast over the room. "Jocelyn, you should go back to the bungalow and sleep." Brown eyes showed the concern he tried to hide.

"Len didn't want him to be left alone. It's alright Spock. I'll get some rest today."

"Evan has arrived. He said he will come here as soon as you get back. I believe Crystal has, how do you say, worn Mr. Chekov out."

"No doubt. I'll get Jo and Len."

"Has the doctor gotten adequate sleep?"

"He's had about eleven hours."

"I shall remain here."

"Thank you." She gave him a kiss then left for the on-call room. The room was dark as she quietly entered. "Lights 10%." She sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed her ex-husband's back. Joce stopped thinking of him as her ex years before. He was her friend, her best friend after her husband, and the father of her oldest. "Lenny, it's time to get up. I'm sorry sweetie, but it's morning."

He turned carefully to face her. Jo stirred as she began to wake. "Mmmmmm. Shit! I should have been up already."

"Len, you needed the rest. You're no good to anyone if you aren't rested. Jojo, we need to get you back to the bungalow."

Jo was rubbing her eyes. "Mom, I want to stay with daddy."

"Your dad needs to work. Uncle Evan is there, so are Aunt Seri and Aunt Cal." Joce wanted to see Evan. She needed to have him hold her. She also needed to talk to Seri. Seri had become a sister to her, and she hated to see her sister in pain. Then there was Cal. She was like her brother, terrified, but trying to look calm and collected. She wanted to be there for her when her sister-in-law finally broke. Seri couldn't handle it, not now, but Joce could.

"Can I come back later?"

"Turtle, I'll call your mom when you can come back." Jo was draped across his back, with her head resting on his shoulder. As much as he hated why they were there, he reveled in the feel of his baby near him. "Joce, tell Evan thanks for coming, and for everything he did before he left. I appreciate it, more than you know."

"He'll be here in a couple of hours. You know he won't be able to stay away. You can tell him yourself."

"I have to get up Turtle." Jo sat up and leaned against the wall. He sat up, leaned his elbows on his knees and ran his hands through his hair. Why did all hospital floors look like grey egg shells?

"Jo, why don't you go to Uncle Jim's room. Uncle Spock is there." Joce moved the pillow and sat next to Len. She put her hand on his back.

"Alright mommy." She scrambled off the end of the bed, giving her dad a kiss on the head before leaving the room.

"Talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking. I'm not Seri; no matter what you think, I can't read your mind."

His hands scratched through his hair before he sat up straight to stretch his back. "I did all the calculations. A human isn't a tribble, it was easier with the fluffball. Kahn's blood can heal, but it can't fix everything. Jim was in stasis, so maybe, just maybe, this formula will work. Joce, I can't guarantee anything. I'm not God. If he was completely gone, I can't get him back. But if he wasn't completely gone then maybe… I don't know what to do. I know Seri and Jaz say they can feel him and he is dreaming, but I don't know what that means."

Seeing him like this hurt her. She could feel his pain. "You're right, you aren't God. You are a damn good doctor." The door opened. I clearly exhausted intern saw the doctor and half ran away from the room. "I'm going to Hell for it, but I love when they do that. Len, no one is expecting you to be God."

"They're expecting a miracle."

"Are they, or are they just hoping?"

He rested his head on her shoulder as she wrapped her arm around him. "Joce, I'm scared. You didn't see him in that bag. I knew it could happen, but I didn't really understand what it meant." He stood and began pacing.

"I saw him in that tube. Len, you don't know anything yet. Give it time."

"It's been fucking two weeks. How much more time before I have to admit nothing is going to change?"

"It takes as long as it takes. What do the monitors say?"

"That he is alive. His heart is beating on its own and he is breathing on his own, but that is all. Brain function is minimal to moderate with little to no change."

"But there is function above what is needed for autonomous functions?"

"Yes. But not as much above as I would have hoped for. The transfusion is also wreaking havoc with his immune system. His white cell count is lower than I thought it would be. It's sitting at about twelve hundred."

"Could that change?" She was talking him through a difficult case. They hadn't done this since he was at Emory.

"I think so. Something similar happened with the tribble."

"Tell me more about the tribble."

Len pulled a chair up and sat across from one his closest friends. "You know I can't pass up an opportunity to study. Jim wanted me to study what made Kahn the way he was; was he some kind of a superman, or not. I had enough to run a couple small samples through different panel studies. There were abnormalities in his leukocytes. They contained an unknown factor. They didn't cause leukocytosis when fighting infection, it was as if the ones present attacked the infection like they were an elite military unit. The red blood cells could carry more O2 if necessary. The platelets could stop internal bleeds that normally would require primary intervention. There were enzymes and proteins present that I had never seen in human blood before. It was as if the best of many species were married together to create a super being. It explained the strength and speed. I'm still not sure about the intellect, that would constitute a study of his brain, maybe later." Joce rubbed his arm to keep him talking. "Scotty's pet tribble, died. I had been treating the little guy before he passed. He had gotten close to the core after escaping his enclosure and suffered from radiation poisoning. I asked Scotty and he was okay with me using it to see what Kahn's blood could do. I put it in stasis while I created a platelet serum. Don't worry, I won't get into the chemistry of it."

"Thank you for that." She lightly smiled at him.

He chuckled. The chemistry part of their discussions was when he would lose Joce. "After I created what I thought might work, I took the ball of fur out of stasis and infused it into a central vein. They don't have many vessels so I picked the one that moved the most blood. It infused over about a half an hour. Tribbles are pretty small. It didn't work. I wanted to run a necropsy, but the battle with Kahn started and I put it on hold. I felt Jim…Then they wheeled him in, in the fucking bag. I couldn't continue to stand. Scotty was in tears and I couldn't do anything. I sat on the chair next to Chuckles; that was the tribble's name. I was trying not to cry, but I couldn't stop the tears. When I opened my eyes, I saw Chuckles breathing. That is when I called to the bridge. I needed that asshole's blood. I put Jim in stasis. Spock and Nyota got Kahn to me. I took a pint and threw him back into stasis. Don't worry, it wouldn't come close to killing him, even with his injuries. The serum I produced for Jim is significantly more complex than the one I used on Chuckles. It is specific to cellular breakdown and mutation due to radiation poisoning. I used all of the blood's components, not just the platelets. Please, no more jokes or questions about me conquering death. That isn't what this does. This reverses the effects of radiation poisoning, nothing else."

"Alright, how are the readings when it comes to that, just to that?"

"The cells all seem to be normal. I can't find any indications of radiation damage. His white count is little lower than I would have hoped."

"Could that be because of the type of white blood cells that are at work? You said they are like an elite military force."

He turned his attention from the floor to the woman in front of him. Joce was the best at this, but then she had years of practice. When he was at Emory, she would talk him through his most complicated case studies. Len could easily get through the most complicated of trauma surgeries, but research needed a sounding board; that was Joce. Seri was his sounding board to get through being the CMO of Starfleet's flagship, but this was different. Again, he thanked God for the women in his life. "It could. Maybe he doesn't need higher or normal levels. I look at the monitors, and now I'm not sure what the readings really mean."

"So, there is the possibility that his body is healing itself?"

"There is. There is also the possibility that this is as good as it gets."

"But it's only been two weeks. You said yourself that the serum initially did a number on his system, the radiation definitely did."

"They both did. He has been off of life support since yesterday."

"So, his brain is healing."

"Yes, the cardiac and respiratory systems are doing better. And as you pointed out the brain has to be since the autonomic systems are working. But he is still unconscious. He may never wake."

"Jo said she can't feel him."

"Seri and Jaz can. They have been trying to access his subconscious and they can get in once in a while."

"Could he be blocking them?"

"I don't know. They both say this is new territory. I guess it is new territory for all of us. I made the serum from a half pint of the asshole's blood. It seemed to be more than enough. I don't know though."

"No one does. I'm going to say something that you probably will never hear from me again. I don't want you to get a big head but, you are a brilliant man and a galaxy class scientist. If you can't do this, I doubt there is anyone who can." She patted the side of his face.

"Thanks for that. What if I saved him and this is as good as it gets? What if all I did was torture him? He might be better off dead."

"If he doesn't wake, or he does and there are issues, we will deal with it then. It is too early to tell. As Seri would tell you, for now it is healthier to go forward as if he will wake and heal." She got up, moved behind him, and put her arms around his neck. He leaned back on her for a few minutes before getting up and giving her a kiss on the forehead. "Donkey, yesterday was exactly two weeks. Don't worry yet."

"I'll try not to. Thanks sweetie. You are the best ex-wife in the universe."

"I know." They both smiled softly as he opened the door for her. The walk to Jim's room, if not exactly light, had been better than the walk to the on-call room.