It was morning in Gravity Falls and Gideon was sitting on a bench drinking a can of soda while wearing shades. The former television psychics looked like he was waiting for someone judging by his not so conspicuous position.
Just then, Gideon's very good friend from prison, Ghost Eyes sat next to Gideon, also wearing some cool shades.
Gideon, through his shades, gave his accomplice a brief glance and asked, "Were you followed?"
"Even if they did, they'd be spotted anyway." Ghost Eyes replied. "But, I have the ins and outs of the place where they're hosting it." The former convict handed Gideon a piece of paper which looked like blueprints for some kind of labyrinth.
"Hmm, did they see through your disguise?"
"Barley." Ghost Eyes replied with a smile. "I mean, I did say two men controlling horses weren't dead."
"Yes, you did." Gideon sighed.
"So, how are we gonna pull this off?" Ghost Eyes asked.
"This is a heist that won't be completed with two of us." Gideon replied. "And the rest aren't exactly bank robbing experts. No offence, guys!"
"None taken!" Gideon's former cellmates replied from across the street where they were standing by a wall playing cards.
"So, what do we do?" Ghost Eyes asked.
"We need a team." Gideon replied. "And I might know just the ones. But they have to be willing. Begin phase 1."
Phase 1: The Crew
Gideon and Ghost Eyes are at a gym watching people working out while eating a sandwich and drinking a canned soda.
"Boss, aren't you a little too young to workout?" Ghost Eyes asked.
"I may be 11, but I've been doing sit-ups at home." Gideon replied. "And I'm not here to workout, I'm here to recruit my first crew member.
They notice a boxing bag flying pass them, a sight that startled Ghost Eyes, while Gideon remained calm and cool.
"Meet our first crew member."
Gideon points to none other then Grenda, who was in her signature clothing and panting heavily. "I should be allowed to work out! My boyfriend, the Prince of Austria says so!"
Grenda then turned to her right and saw Gideon and Ghost Eyes watching her, a sight that made her angrier.
"What do you want Gideon?!"
"Grenda, how would you like revenge on a certain tribe?" Gideon asked.
"Depends on the tribe." Grenda replied. "What makes you think I'd be interested?"
Gideon handed a piece of paper which Grenda took and started examining it. She smiled and said to the former TV star, "You little son of a no good car dealer, I'm in."
Later, Gideon and Ghost Eyes were in a private car park, sitting in a bench, watching someone driving their car as fast as a formula 9 race car driver. The car spun around in place leading to release some dirt from the ground and smoke as well.
"Is this driving lesson legal?" Ghost Eyes asked.
"I don't care." Gideon replied. "This woman is a perfect getaway driver."
The car soon stopped spinning and landed in a perfect parking space like a professional stunt driver.
Inside the car, a terrified driving instructor with brown short hair, huge glasses, a red sweater and hazel eyes, was scribbling on a piece of paper on her clipboard. The person she was teaching to drive was none other than Wendy, who looked confident about what she did.
"So, how did I do?" Wendy asked.
"I-I-I-I-I-I-I think, you'd do better as a stunt driver." The driving instructor replied.
"So, is that a pass?" Wendy asked.
"Get out."
"Huh?"
"Get out!" The instructor's aggressive demand made Wendy sprint out of the car and out of the car park as fast as a runaway criminal. Wendy soon stopped to catch her breath where she realised that Gideon was standing by the exit, looking like he was waiting for her.
"What are you doing standing about, Gideon?" Wendy asked like she didn't wish for him to be here.
"Wendy, I need a getaway driver." Gideon replied as he took off his shades. "And you fit the perfect candidate."
"You might as well find a new one." Wendy replied. "I don't have a driver's license."
Gideon then threw a small card at Wendy, which the redhead teen caught. She read it and was a driver's license with her birthdate and picture and information.
"How did you do this?" Asked the amazed Wendy.
"I have friends in low places." Gideon replied.
"What's this heist?" Wendy asked.
Later, Gideon and Ghost Eyes were standing by the street, looking like they were both waiting for something important.
Gideon took a sip of orange juice from a small juice box while Ghost Eyes was looking confused before sighing.
"What's the surprise?" Ghost Eyes asked.
"I ordered someone." Gideon replied. "And my package should be here in….3…..2….1…"
Just then, a truck drove past and threw a package out, landing in the road.
Gideon then pulled a box cutter from his sleeve and used it to open the sealed package.
And inside the package was none other than Candy, who has somehow managed to fit inside the box like a body contortionist. Because that's what she was to the surprise of Gideon. She moved her limbs like a kid twisting their doll as she got out of the box, an act that disgusted Ghost Eyes that he threw up into the nearest trash can.
"Ghost Eyes, meet our flexible crew member, Candy." Gideon said.
"What is Candy doing?" Candy asked.
"I know criminal acts aren't your thing, but maybe this will intrigue you." Gideon handed Candy a piece of paper which she started to analyse before she smiled like a psychopath.
"You had my curiosity, now you have Candy's interest." Candy said before shaking Gideon's hand.
Later, Gideon and Ghost Eyes were having dinner with Old Man McGucket who looked alarmed by what they were offering.
"I'm sorry, but that's a terrabibble plane!" McGucket exclaimed.
"Why McGucket?" Gideon asked.
"Let me finish, a terrabibble plane I wanna be a part of." Old Man McGucket said.
Gideon and Ghost Eyes stared at each other, confused by as to why McGucket wants to join if the plan was terrible.
Ghost Eyes was about to comment on that, but Gideon just sighed and hushed him.
"Don't Ghost Eyes, just don't."
Later, in the mall, Pacifica was out doing some personal clothes shopping for herself. Sure, she was living with the Pines, but they weren't exactly perfect when it came to picking the perfect clothes for herself.
She entered the girl section and picked a pink T-Shirt that said 'I Heart Babba.' She was about to enter the changing room, when suddenly, she got stopped by her two former friends.
"Well, well, well, if it ain't Pacifica Northwest." Said the girl with brown hair and a blue dress.
"Oh, hey." Pacifica greeted them awkwardly. "How are you?"
"How are we?" The girl with black hair and pink dress scoffed. "Did Pacifica Northwest just ask how are we?"
"Uh, she really has stooped low since she started dating that dork." Girl 1 said. "What was his name? Dipper? Or was it, dork?" The mean girls laughed at the insult, even though it wasn't a very good one.
Pacifica looked like she was hurt, but she then smirked and chuckled. "Really? Dork? That's the best you can do?"
"Well….I…I…I…I..I.." Girl 1 stuttered.
"I….I…I…I…I think, you need to work on your insults more." Pacifica replied with a confident smirk. "I mean that was so bad that if there was a word for dumb insult, they'd be a picture of you."
"Oh!" Girl 2 exclaimed as Girl 1 got schooled.
"Anything from you?" Pacifica asked her former friend. "Or will you have nothing contribute?"
Girl 2 stopped laughing and appeared she was gonna say something. "Nothing, good." Pacifica interjected.
The two girls felt both surprised and insulted. Surprised since they didn't expect Pacifica to still have it even though she's turned a new leaf. And insulted because those were some very harsh burns.
"I should expect so from two girls with no personality." Pacifica continued. "And also, it's a good thing I never bothered to know your names. Because people will just refer to you as Mean Girl Sidekick 1 and Mean Girl Sidekick 2."
Pacifica then started to walk into the changing room while her former best friends were stunned and appalled.
"Insulting Pacifica Northwest was a bad idea." Said Mean Girl Sidekick 1.
"I told ya." Mean Girl Sidekick 2 responded.
Inside one of the changing booths, Pacifica had decided to try on a dark purple dress she wanted to wear. She took off her jacket as she started to get ready to change, but was interrupted by a familiar voice.
"Pacifica Northwest."
Pacifica screamed as she looked around the changing booth to see if anyone was in there with her. But fortunately there wasn't.
"Don't worry, I'm in the next booth." Gideon assured her.
"Gideon?" Pacifica reacted in surprise. "How long were you in there?"
"Two hours." Gideon replied. "I mean honestly, how long does it take for you to pick a dress."
"It's a Northwest thing." Pacifica replied. "But, when other people walked in here did you say my name? I mean, I hate to be a bit like Dipper at the moment, but would it be easier if you just walked up to me and offered what you're offering?"
"Who said I was offering?" Gideon asked. "But yes: I am offering. Ghost Eyes!"
A piece of paper was slipped under a booth next door from Pacifica. She picked it up and started to read it.
"It's nice to know your mean girl attitude is still intact." Gideon commented.
"Yeah." Pacifica agreed while smiling. "Good thing."
"Hey Gideon, can I come out?" Ghost Eyes asked. "I've been holding it in for 2 hours."
"What happened to the bottle I gave ya?" Gideon asked.
"I…..Used it." Ghost Eyes replied.
"For what?"
"You don't want to know."
Later, Gideon and Ghost Eyes were eating at Greasy's Diner where Ghost Eyes was eating a perfect egg sandwich, while Gideon was eating a grilled cheese sandwich.
"So, I know we haven't had the best of encounters….." Gideon started while chowing down on his meal. "….But, I think we can do wonders if you join me and Ghost Eyes."
"Hi." Ghost Eyes greeted while eating his egg sandwich.
"This is a task you may think is impossible, but with my planning and precision, I think we can pull this off." Gideon continued. "So, what do you say?"
The person the two former convicts were talking to just so happened to be another former convict, Stanley Pines, who was eating a bacon sandwich with cheese on top.
"Hmm, I don't know." Stan said with an unsure face. "I mean, I haven't been to prison and I don't think I should go back to prison. I mean this is a crime that…Just kidding, I'm in for a heist!"
"Eggscellent." Ghost Eyes beamed while showing his egg sandwich.
The former convict's pun made Gideon and Stan narrow their eyes at him due to it being so awful.
Later, Gideon and Ghost Eyes were in Dipper and Mabel's bedroom trying to recruit the young male Pines twin.
"Wait, why do you two want me for a heist?" Dipper asked. "I mean, 1: I can't do heists. 2: Why would I wanna work with you? And 3: What would I contribute to a heist? I mean, I'd be the kind of guy who'd screw up and get captured."
"Dipper, I know this may seem insane and coming from us….." Gideon started. "…But, maybe who we're robbing from might interest you."
Gideon handed Dipper a piece of paper which he took from Gideon's hand and he started to read it. He quickly smiled and responded, "Why didn't you start with that to begin with?"
Later, Gideon and Ghost Eyes were in the living room chatting with Mabel about what they were offering.
"So Mabel, do you want to be a part of the heist?" Gideon asked.
"Huh?" Mabel reacted. "What heist? You just walked in and asked if I wanted to be a part of this heist. But I don't know what the heist is."
"Mabel, I am confident that the heist will intrigue you." Gideon handed Mabel a piece of paper which the crazy Pine twin started to read.
After about 12 seconds, Mabel pulled a psychotic smile and said, "I'm in."
"Great, now we just have to convince Ford." Gideon said with glee.
"I don't know Gideon, stuff like that is gonna be difficult for him to be convinced by." Mabel warned Gideon with an unsure tone in her voice.
"Don't worry, Mabel." Gideon assured her. "I'm sure he'll accept this offer."
But when Gideon and Ghost Eyes got down to the basement into Ford's lab, he was less than pleased. "Are you two serious?!"
"Yes." Gideon replied.
"I may not look it, but yes." Ghost Eyes replied.
"No! No! No! No! No!" Ford repeated. "This is a bad idea! A bad idea made out of too many bad ideas! You have to be either stupid or crazy for a death wish if you want to steal from unicorns!"
"You're talking like we want to steal their gold." Gideon said.
"Well, whatever you want to steal from them, don't!" Ford demanded. "Because this is a bad idea!"
"What if we told you it was hair?" Gideon queried.
Ford froze and looked at the two former convicts with an uneasy look. "Uh….You want to steal hair from them?" Both Gideon and Ghost Eyes nodded as their reply.
"Okay, you're insane." Ford concluded. "You want to go in the unicorn labyrinth to steal their hair?! What is the reason?!"
"With Toffee about, it's best we protect the Shack from him just in case." Gideon replied.
"But we already have Toffee." Ford replied while pointing to Michael C Hall, who was tied up.
"Untie me!" Michael demanded. "Do you know who I am?!"
"Quiet Toffee!"
"Who is Toffee?!" Michael exclaimed.
"How did you capture him?" Ghost Eyes asked.
"I had help." Ford replied while pointing to the star of the Kung-Fu Kid, William Zabka, whom was sitting on a chair, reading Ralph Macchio's biography.
"Hey Gideon." William said.
"William Zabka helped you?" Asked the surprise Gideon.
"Yes, he was quite cooperative." Ford replied.
"I've never been involved in a kidnapping." William explained. "And it's always been on my bucket list."
"My bucket list included William Zabka rescuing me!" Michael exclaimed.
"Unless you have any toffee, Toffee, shut up!" William demanded.
"But still, unicorn hair?" Ford queried. "That only works with Bill. You haven't seen him, have you?"
"Well, don't you wanna take the risk just in case he returned?" Gideon asked.
"Well, I promised myself I'd never get involved in a heist, but this will be the only time." Ford sighed. "To the pleasure of my brother."
"Brilliant." Gideon said. "We have the crew, ready."
Phase 2: The Plan
Later, Gideon was showing a chalkboard with the drawing of a huge labyrinth shaped building with crude drawings of unicorns, while the people who have been recruited by the former child star, were watching him with a keen eye.
"Okay, this is where the heist will be taking place…" Gideon explained. "….inside this labyrinth there is a unicorn party going on. And inside the labyrinth, there is a vault with the unicorn's hair."
"Wait, why is there a vault of hair?" Pacifica asked. "I've heard of a vault of wigs, but hair?"
"What's wrong with having a vault of hair?" McGucket asked. "I have a safe with my armpit hair."
Everyone in the room cringed while Michael groaned in annoyance.
"I know it may seem hard to believe, but Ghost Eyes went in there and his intel seemed very likely to believe." Gideon explained.
"It's true." Ghost Eyes replied. "Although it was hard. I mean, do you know what it's like to control a two person unicorn suit? It's really hard."
"Anyway, I have got you involved in this heist because you three are the perfect candidates for the kind of people I need." Gideon explained. "Dipper, you're role in the heist is a journal nerd, so your job is to explain any information about unicorns over these ear pieces that Ford invented."
Ford raised his eyebrow in surprise. "How do you know about my ear pieces?"
"Found them on display." Gideon replied. "Speaking of inventing, that's where you come in Ford. You're tasked with inventing explosives and ear pieces for all of us."
"Why not practical explosives?" Ford asked.
"I know I'm a hostage, but I have to agree with Ford on this one." Michael said. "Why can't you just use practical explosives?"
"Because practical explosives don't do well with these kinds of vaults." Gideon replied. "They'll only make loud noises. Since you're the monster expert and know the weaknesses of the majority of them, you might know how to destroy the unicorn vault."
"And what are mine and McGucket's role?" Candy asked.
"We'll get to that." Gideon replied. "Wendy's role will be the getaway driver."
"But what will be the getaway vehicle?" Wendy asked. "Because, I doubt a car is gonna fit the eleven of us."
"If you can drive a car, you can drive a van." Gideon said.
"Those are two different things." Mabel pointed out.
"Same functions."
"Different!" Michael interjected.
"Can I put duct tape on his mouth?" William Zabka asked.
"No William." Ford said. "I want Toffee to confess."
"And Stan's role will be to steal the getaway vehicle." Gideon explained. "Have you stole vans?"
Stan then started to think. "I'm not sure if I did steal vans. I remember stealing cars, bicycles, motorcycles and maybe-Just kidding, I stole vans! Give me a van and I'll take it."
"Great." Gideon said. "Now, mine and Ghost Eyes' role is to go undercover at the event in order to give you the tips."
"Uh…..No offence, but I don't think you guys will be able to fit in." Pacifica said.
"And that's where you come in." Gideon responded.
"Okay, how many people come in?!" Grenda asked angrily. "What's my part?"
"If one more person asks what's your part one more time than I will go over there and recreate a scene from Baxter and using Michael as my victim!" Ghost Eyes unexpected outburst caused everyone, including Gideon, Michael and William to freeze in shock and surprise.
"Uh….Thank you Ghost Eyes." Gideon said. "So, we have two days before the gala. Pacifica, you have experiences of getting into parties you're not invited to, right?"
"A Northwest is always invited, even without an invitation." Pacifica remarked.
"Great." Gideon responded. "You have two days for perpetration. So, get your assigned disguises and we'll begin."
Phase 3: The Blow Out (Codename for Heist Day)
Two days later.
A grey unicorn with a white horn was watching entrance of the gate while a clipboard with names was floating in front of it. "Okay, Anastasia is here." The unicorn said. "As well as Grey. What kind of name is Grey? I know about 50 unicorns with the last name of grey."
Just then, Pacifica, wearing her dark purple dress was walking to the labyrinth with Dipper wearing his tuxedo while his messy hair was smooth.
"How come I have to have my hair smooth?" Dipper asked. "And what is this hair gel made from? It smells of lemon."
"It's lime." Pacifica informed her boyfriend in a snobby voice. "Besides, you look less of a dork."
"Yeah, but why do I have to have perfect hair while Gideon, Grenda and Ghost Eyes get to keep their hair the way it is?" Dipper asked while pointing to Gideon, Grenda and Ghost Eyes, who were dressed in grey jackets with a white buttoned shirt and grey pants and cool shades.
"They're meant to be my bodyguards." Pacifica replied rudely. "Pay attention, Dipper."
"And why are you acting like a snob?" Dipper asked.
"Staying in character." Pacifica replied. "Uh, what does it look like I'm doing? Uh, doesn't mean I don't love you."
Dipper narrowed his eyes at Gideon, who just gave him a blank stare. "Don't look at me, she's your girlfriend."
The five approached the entrance where the unicorn was giving them a cold glare due to them being humans.
"What do you think you're doing?" The unicorn asked.
"Uh, what does it look like?" Pacifica asked rudely. "I see a party and I want in!"
"Well, you can't because you're human." The unicorn said.
"So?" Pacifica asked rudely. "Wouldn't that make your party, the party of the century? Uh, it's no wonder you're so selfish, you can't even think for yourself until a human comes along."
The unicorn gasped. "Well, I must say, that was the rudest thing I've heard in my life. I guess I have no choice but to let you in."
"No, you don't!" Pacifica rudely retorted.
The five entered the labyrinth where they were seeing the party in full swing. All around the centre of the maze, there were many unicorns dancing and feasting on a magical fountain spitting out what appeared to be rainbow water or something. The five humans weren't sure about the liquid. Was it drinkable?
The five stood by the buffet table at the request of Grenda and Ghost Eyes, who started to analyse the table to see if there was anything edible, while Dipper started to read the journal, while Pacifica made a snob pose to assert her dominance and Gideon pressed his ear piece to communicate with the others.
"Ocean to Moustache; Snob, Beast, White Eyes, Jo and I are in." Gideon said.
"Great." Mabel replied on the other end.
"May I ask why you wished to be called Moustache?" Dipper asked as he pressed his ear piece.
On the other end, Mabel was dressed as a delivery person with a name tag reading 'Dakota' and wearing a moustache. "Because I'm wearing a moustache."
"But you're wearing a badge with the name, Dakota." Grenda pointed out.
"Put a sock in it Grenda." Mabel demanded. "I'm about to deliver the package."
"Don't say it like that, Mabel." Dipper requested from the other end.
"Too late." Mabel retorted before moving the large package on a wheelbarrow instead of a box cart.
She approached a large red door marked back entrance in glitter and the enthusiastic Pines twin knocked on the door and a red unicorn answered.
"Package delivery." Mabel said.
"But I didn't order anything." The unicorn said.
"Yeah well, I got the right location." Mabel replied while looking at her fake clipboard. "Labyrinth in the middle of nowhere."
"Well, this isn't the first time we've received unorganised packages." The unicorn said. "But it usually turns out to be something nice. Like cake. Thanks for the gift, human."
"You're welcome." Mabel said. "Remember, Dakota's the name and I ain't from North or South."
The unicorn chucked as used its horn to try and move the wheelbarrow inside the labyrinth. "I don't understand the joke, but it sure sounds funny. Thank you, funny human."
The unicorn managed to move the wheelbarrow into the maze and closed the door. Once the coast was clear, Mabel took off the moustache and pressed her finger on the earpiece to contact the others.
"Moustache to everyone else, Elastic Band and Hacker are in." Mabel informed them.
Back inside the maze, Gideon had just received news and cringed since he wasn't exactly a fan of the nicknames. "Why did I allow nicknames?" Gideon asked himself.
"So we won't look less suspicious." Wendy replied. "Besides, I love my nickname. Lumber."
"At least you like it." Dipper responded.
"Why am I called Sixer?" Ford asked.
"And why do I have the codename of just Crooked?" Stan asked. "Why can't I be crooked uncle? It's cooler than just crooked."
"Can we just stop discussing nicknames?!" Gideon asked. "Because, I think it's getting out of control! Dipper, can you start talking information about unicorns?"
"Of course." Dipper replied as he pulled out a journal. "Okay people, unicorns are very private creatures which explains why they can be hostile towards people."
"Tell us something we don't know." Pacifica requested.
Dipper surfed through the unicorn page to find information they did not know about unicorns. Dipper then pressed his finger on a paragraph and started reading.
"Unicorns tend to have leaders." Dipper replied. "They are called the great unicorn and tend to have a horn bigger than any of the other unicorns."
"Ha! They're definitely compensating!" Grenda laughed.
"Grenda, keep quiet." Gideon demanded.
"What?!" Grenda exclaimed while eating a cupcake. "I couldn't hear you because this cupcake is delicious!"
"Can I continue?" Dipper asked before being interrupted by Ghost Eyes biting down on a nacho.
Ghost Eyes looked at the young Pines twin awkwardly before putting the nacho down and smiling awkwardly. "Sorry."
Dipper sighed. "Okay, every number of years, the unicorn leader is replaced by who he or she deems superior to be their successor. While the previous leader gets to live out the rest of their days in a random universe of their choice."
"Sounds like the best retirement plan ever." Stan commented.
"Anyway, when the leader is retiring, they have a celebration like this one." Dipper continued. "Where the unicorns gather to witness who the new leader is and watch their current leader leave their universe. The leader of the unicorns makes a speech before departing to the universe of his choice."
"You seem to know a lot about what we do." Said a rough voice.
The five looked up and notice a huge golden unicorn with very muscular legs and a beard. The mere sight of the unicorn was very intimidating since you didn't exactly know what it was gonna do to them. Was he gonna kill them? Was he gonna do something horrible to them for knowing lots?
The mere sight of the unicorn was so terrifying that it made Grenda squeeze her cream donut that the cream shot out while Ghost Eyes spilt his drink. Dipper was sweating nervously along with Gideon, while Pacifica didn't looked nervous at all.
"Uh….Yes." Dipper said.
"You know, a human knowing about this stuff is a bad idea?" The muscular unicorn pointed out.
"So what?" Pacifica scoffed to the unicorns face. "So what if he knows about unicorns? He knows more about unicorns than you do about shaving!"
The tall unicorn narrowed his eyes at the Northwest where Pacifica felt somehow, intimidated by the tall unicorn, worrying if he was gonna do something horrible or violent.
"The last person who said that, ended up having their eyes squished with my horn and it wasn't a unicorn." The huge unicorn explained. "So, you better be careful to who you're talking to. For I am the most dangerous unicorn who ever existed. The Everest."
The unicorn then clopped away in intimidating fashion while Pacifica was terrified by a unicorn of all things. A unicorn!
Dipper placed a hand on his terrified girlfriend, who was sweating like crazy. "You okay?"
"I am traumatised." Pacifica replied while shaking. "I'm gonna need a drink."
Gideon drank a sip of a cranberry juice before pressing his finger on the earpiece to get into contact. "Ocean to Crooked and Lumber, anything on your end?"
Outside the labyrinth, Stan and Wendy were inside the escape van which is cleverly disguised as a delivery van.
"Crooked to Ocean, me and Lumber haven't seen anything suspicious." Stan replied. "I'm just staring at the labyrinth while Wendy is on the lookout with her eyes closed."
Stan took a glance at Wendy, whom was sleeping quite heavily, not even interested in what's going on.
"Thanks for the intel, Crooked." Gideon said. "Inform me if you see anything."
"Will do, Ocean." Stan replied before hanging. The crooked Pines twin tapped Wendy's head, waking her up from her slumber.
"Huh?" Wendy reacted. "I'm awake! I saw…Nothing."
"Oh." Stan replied. "Well, keep being on the lookout and don't fall to sleep. Cause you're the getaway driver."
"I know." Wendy replied before positioning herself like she was gonna fall asleep.
Stan and Wendy managed to sit up straight and started to look forward to see if there was anything that was worth reporting and so far, nothing.
Stan awkwardly took glances at her as he tried to think of a conversation to have with his former employee. "So, heard you were having therapy."
"Mmm hmm." Wendy replied.
"How is it?" Stan asked.
"Nothing important." Wendy replied. "She's keeping secrets."
"As therapists should." Stan commented.
The two then went back to silent as they continued to stare out into the distance, in silence.
"We have nothing to talk about." Wendy commented.
"I have no idea why we were paired up." Stan said.
Inside the labyrinth, the unicorn that was handling the package, was moving the box with its horn since it was taking the wooden crate to storage.
"This package is useless." The unicorn said to himself. "Good thing I'm putting it in the storage." The unicorn continued to push the crate, despite the fact he was pushing it with his horn.
But the unicorn soon stopped and started thinking. "Hmm, I better check what's in this crate. New leader has a severe allergy to peanuts." The unicorn opened the crate to see…..Candy and Old Man McGucket looking as stiff as mannequins. The unicorn groaned in annoyance. "More stuffed humans. Better put it in storage right next to the vault."
The unicorn then used his mouth to place the lid back on the crate and continued pushing it. "These humans look worse than the last ones. Especially the ones with the sideway eyes."
The unicorn approached a bunch of moving rainbow coloured lasers guarding the ginormous vault leading to the unicorn hair. The unicorn then pushed the crate inside the storage room where there were other boxes featuring mannequins.
He sighed. "Who even keeps delivering them?" The unicorn then closed the door before going to join the party.
After the conformation that the unicorn was gone, Candy and McGucket popped out of the crate so they can begin the heist.
The two were wearing black beanies, black shirt, black gloves, black pants, black shoes and black paint all over their faces. Well, Candy went with black while McGucket went with very bright white.
"McGucket, it was supposed to be black." Candy said.
"I had no black paint!" McGucket replied. "So I went with the first can of paint I saw. Which so happened to be white. Although, there was brown and dark grey."
Candy facepalmed herself before she and McGucket jumped out of the box. To get to the vault.
Luckily, the unicorn had left the door unlocked so the two could get to the lasers leading to the vault of hair.
The two stood in front of the lasers which all moved up and down, just to make things very difficult for all of them.
McGucket raised an eyebrow and asked Candy, "How will we get pash that?"
"Leave that to Candy." Candy replied before moving to the front of the lasers. The crazy friend of Mabel bounced on the spot before moving her body like a gymnast.
She moved through the lasers flawlessly by performing all sorts of flips, splits, split rolls, front flips, back flips, wall jumps and cartwheels. Candy did almost slip up where she landed on all fours but her right hand almost touched one of the lasers. But she did pull herself together and got to the vault.
The girl smiled before finding the source of the lasers, which just so happened to be a rainbow diamond flashing against another rainbow diamond all in a wall. She removed one of them and that deactivated all the lasers leading to the vault.
McGucket pulled a straight face as he walked past Candy. "You sure you don't have any memical condietions I should be aware of?" McGucket asked.
"I am so flexible, I can fit down a draining pipe like an Italian plumber." Candy replied.
McGucket then approached the vault as he pulled a computer out of his satchel and started typing. "Okay, door abut to be open." McGucket said.
"You ever wonder how others are doing in heists?" Candy asked.
"Nah, but I imagine they're doing something fun." McGucket replied.
Meanwhile, Grenda and Ghost Eyes were busy feasting on all the appetisers at the buffet table, while Pacifica was drinking a glass of rainbow liquid, while Dipper was looking through the journal, while Gideon was on the lookout for anything.
"Ocean to everyone else, how are things?" Gideon asked.
"Waiting." Ford replied.
"Waiting." Wendy and Stan replied at the same time.
"Hacker and Elastic Band are in." McGucket replied. "Just doing the hamming."
There was the sound of what sounded like somebody tapping a champagne glass with the handle of a fork but it turned out, it was a white unicorn with a moustache tapping on an ice sculpture of a ginormous unicorn.
"Unicorns and esteemed guests of honour!" Yelled the unicorn while narrowing its eyes at the humans.
"Hi there!" Exclaimed Ghost Eyes and Grenda in unison.
"Yes, welcome." The unicorn said. "I've called your attention because the leader is about to make his grand entrance where he will announce his successor. But first, question: Did anyone recently lose a horn with a horn ring on? Because we found a horn."
The unicorns all laughed while Gideon, Pacifica, Dipper, Ghost Eyes and Grenda weren't laughing since they didn't exactly get the joke.
"This must be funny to unicorns." Ghost Eyes said.
"Hmm, this must be one that we have to think hard about." Grenda said.
The unicorns soon stopped laughing while the unicorn who made the announcement smiled. "That joke was terrible, don't give me sympathy. Anyway, please welcome our leader, King Chandler."
Just then, a huge dark orange unicorn walked down the stairs with long blonde hair and a metallic horn on top. The unicorn was as big as a wardrobe and looked like the kind of unicorn that could crush someone's head with a single stop of its hoof.
The unicorn exhaled from its nose, releasing some kind of smoke from its nostrils like a dragon.
The leader turned to his fellow unicorns in a threatening manner before taking a breath. "Unicorns, it is time for me to depart from this world and move on to a better world. For those who don't know, my time as leader has ended and I now must pass on my role of leadership to my successor who I have chased wisely. Before I announce the successor I will explain where I will be going. Bring out the rainbow portal!"
A ginormous gate opened and a whole bunch of unicorns were pulling a ginormous circular rock ring held together by two ancient handles at the bottom. It was so big that a majority of the guests had to back away to make sure they didn't get in the way of the ceremonial artefact. The unicorns stopped pulling it once they were in front of King Chandler.
"This here, is where I will be going." King Chandler continued. "My destination of choice will be an island belonging to sorcerers and witches and the birthplace of the Earth creatures known as giraffes. I don't know why they hated that place as well. Its weather consists of boiling rain so I can watch as the residence burn. It will bring me amusement. Yes! It is known as, The Boiling Isles."
The unicorns cheered wildly and they stomped their hooves with approval at where their leader's choice of location. Meaning it was a great place to be.
"Now, my successor." King Chandler continued. "He is the strongest unicorn who ever existed. He is a champ and has killed many unicorns in the pits of war, he is Goldor 'The Everest.'
The ginormous golden unicorn that the crew had met like 15 minutes ago walked on stage to his predecessor where his hooves were covered in what appeared to be unicorn tears but Dipper thought it was most definitely unicorn blood.
Dipper and Pacifica were terrified that this unicorn was gonna be the successor since he looked like the kind of unicorn that would invade the human race without a second thought.
"On the bright side, at least he didn't choose the unicorn that…..That…." Ghost Eyes then started to think about the other unicorns at the event. "….Actually, I don't know anyone else."
The Everest approached King Chandler while the king looked on, pulling a sinister grin. The king then noted the liquid on his successor's hooves, still smiling.
"May I inquire as to what that stuff on your hooves are?" King Chandler asked.
"Unicorn tears." The Everest replied.
"You sure?" The king asked. "Because our blood, sweat and tears are made of the same substance."
"Does it matter?" The Everest asked with a cold hearted stare.
"Uh, yeah." Pacifica replied.
"Who wants to bet he'll kill the butler?" Grenda asked. "I'm betting 200 gold coins and 3 cupcakes."
Meanwhile, McGucket was busy typing the code to the safe while Candy was busy playing with a yo-yo to pass the time.
It had been a few minutes since McGucket got started, but he wasn't even finished yet. And the absolute long wait was killing Candy while looking tired.
"How much longer?" Candy asked.
"Give it time." McGucket replied. "Hamming ain't a quick man's jub."
Just then, behind the two, two unicorns were walking while talking about the stuff in the storage. This included the same unicorn that took the crate in.
"So, we got another stash of human mannequins." The red unicorn that was covered in black and dark green stripes all over.
"Why do we keep getting those?" The unicorn asked. "It's completely unnecessary. It's like they're trying way too hard to sneak iiiiiiiiiiii-Wait a minute, humans!"
The unicorns noticed Candy and McGucket trying to break into the vault. When the two realised they were caught, they froze and looked at them awkwardly while the second vault door opened to reveal a third one.
"Aww come on!" Candy angrily exclaimed.
"They're trying to steal our precious hair!" The unicorn with red fur yelled.
"How dare they?!" The unicorn with stripes shouted.
"Uh oh." McGucket said before pressing on his ear piece to contact the others. "Hacker to Beast, code D."
On the other end, Grenda heard the signal and tore the sleeves off her dress and shouted, "Distraction!"
She screamed and started charging towards another buffet table across the room, an act that didn't go unnoticed by every unicorn in attendance. Including the leader who smiled sinisterly at the sight.
Grenda was about to crash into the buffet table, but the unicorns stopped her by trapping her in a force filed coming from their horns.
But it wasn't just Grenda who was captured in the force field, Gideon, Dipper, Ghost Eyes and Pacifica were also captured in the force field by the unicorns.
The unicorns carried the captured guests to their leaders, as well as Candy and McGucket, whom were also captured.
"How were you two captured?" Gideon asked the two while staring at them with confusion.
"McGucket was a slow hacker." Candy replied.
"But I did do it, dimint I?" McGucket asked.
Candy sighed in annoyance over McGucket's response before rambling in French.
"Well, well, well, well." King Chandler laughed. "If it ain't the team that tried to rob me."
The team froze in surprise and shock over this revelation since they tried way too hard to be discreet about the whole heist.
"How did he figure it out?" Dipper asked.
"I have ears all over." The king replied. "You don't think I had a way to hear your conversations? You're trying to get our unicorn hair. Might I inquire as to why? And why you didn't think of asking us?"
"Because we know if we ask, you would've said no." Ghost Eyes replied.
"Quite right." King Chandler confirmed. "Because, you don't deserve that hair! Unless for good reason! But even if that reason has morales, I still wouldn't give you any! That's ours!"
"We needed that hair to protect us." Gideon replied. "From a threat who calls himself, Toffee."
"But, we captured him." Dipper pointed out.
"Well, we need to defend it from other forces." Gideon replied. "I mean, he does have an army! Which includes Pacifica's Dad who's an ice zombie now or something like that."
"And, why should that concern me?" King Chandler asked.
"Because not only is this a big threat to us, it will affect you as well." Gideon replied. "And other unicorns including your successor."
The soon-to-be-retired king just gave a cold smile and said, "Good thing I found another universe to live out the rest of my days."
The Everest pulled a cold smile as well before looking at his soon-to-be predecessor. "Should I crush them with my hooves."
"If you want." King Chandler replied. "But, I'm too old to witness violence. Do it after I leave."
"Oh, this is how we die?!" Grenda asked. "Death by unicorns?! What is wrong with the world?!"
"At least I'm dying, knowing I'm in a relationship!" Pacifica exclaimed.
"At least I'm out of prison!" Ghost Eyes shouted.
"Aww! But I won't be able to see my uncle!" Candy yelled.
"I won't be able to know if my journals will be sold!" Dipper shouted.
"Guys, we're gonna live." Gideon responded.
The response from their leader caused his crew, except for McGucket and Candy, to stare at him like he was just being too positive, because their fates had been sealed. While the unicorns just stared at the little leader like this would be his last ounce of hope on his mind before he is crushed by The Everest.
"What is he talking about?" Pacifica asked.
"I don't know." Dipper replied. "I think you're being too overly positive."
"No." Gideon replied.
"But you are captured." King Chandler pointed out. "While your little getaway drivers will suffer the same fate. You have lost."
"No." Gideon replied. "You've forgotten our other friends. Specifically, ones in high places."
Suddenly, there was an explosive sound that went off, leading the labyrinth to shake a bit and the people and unicorns as well.
King Chandler stared at the humans with a nervous look in his eyes before looking at the humans and unicorns, trying to think of a clear explanation.
"What was that?" King Chandler asked.
"Like I said, friends in high places." Gideon replied.
Elsewhere, Ford was on a cliff dusting himself off while putting a remote controlled trigger in his coat pocket. He sighed and whispered, "I hope McGucket placed the bombs on the safe." He then noticed a delivery truck driven by Stan with Wendy on the passenger seat, heading towards the labyrinth. "Yup."
Meanwhile back in the hall, the king of the unicorns stared at his hostages with a nervous look all over his long face.
"What is this?"
"I placed the bomes on the safe." McGucket replied.
"Huh?" Ghost Eyes asked.
"Gideon, what you didn't tell us?" Pacifica asked.
"I didn't tell you about the pull-off." Gideon replied. "Which is what I call the moment where the bad guys realise, they have been duped."
Just then, the sound of a van crashing through a wall was heard, startling the unicorns, Dipper, Pacifica, Ghost Eyes and Grenda.
"Who was that?" Dipper asked.
"That'll be your Grunkle giving a grand entrance." Gideon replied.
Meanwhile, two unicorns were backing away from wall debris and a delivery van sticking through the wall. In front of them, they see Stan behind the wheel giving a crooked smile.
"Out of the way jerks!" Stan exclaimed. "Don't make me honk my horn! And I'm not talking about my own! Just the one in front of me!" Stan then honked the horn, causing the unicorns to run away.
Stan pulled a crooked smile, while a dizzy Wendy pulled herself together and looked at what was in front of her with confusion. "Did I fall asleep?" Wendy asked.
Mabel then popped out from the back. "Did we die?"
Meanwhile, the terrified unicorns in the hall were in such a panic that the magic they were using to hold Dipper, Gideon, Pacifica, Grenda, Ghost Eyes, McGucket and Candy in bubbles, popped.
"Guys, let's go!" Gideon exclaimed. "And punch any unicorn along the way!"
And so that's what the gang started doing, running towards the exit while Grenda and Ghost Eyes punched panicking unicorns along the way.
"Punch! Punch!"
"Best riot I've been in for a long time!" Ghost Eyes exclaimed.
Pacifica and Dipper were holding hands while running which kind of caught the attention of King Chandler who pulled a crooked smile.
"Everest, get the boy with the pink shade on his nose." King Chandler requested.
"What are we doing?" Everest asked.
"You're not afraid, are ya?" King Chandler asked the unicorn while pulling a sinister smile.
The Everest only replied by turning his terrified face into a cold and merciless one and then he shook his head and then used his magic to trap Dipper in a bubble, causing Pacifica to let go of his hand.
"Gideon!" Dipper screamed out for his leader, who heard his scream and turned around to try and help him while the others ran out, except for Pacifica.
"Help!" Dipper screamed.
"Let him go!" Pacifica demanded angrily.
"What she said!" Gideon responded.
"Listen Little Gideon…." The King started. "…You're taking my hair away from me, so I'll take one of your metaphorical hairs away from you!"
"What will you do with him?!" Pacifica asked worryingly.
"Kill him and you're gonna start a war you won't believe!" Gideon shouted in an attempt to save Gideon.
"Who said I was gonna kill him?" Chandler asked. "My dear Everest is gonna throw Dipper into the Boiling Isles where he shall spend the remainder of the days. As long as their emperor is fine with humans."
"Let him go!" Pacifica demanded while tears of worry fell from her face. "Because if you don't, then you have lost your chance of retirement and you'll be king for many more years! Do you just want to rid away your only chance of going into retirement by getting rid of one worthless human. No offence, babe."
"None taken." Dipper responded. "You're only trying to negotiate."
King Chandler took a short moment to think about what Pacifica was saying and pulled a smile as his response before nodding to The Everest, who nodded back and threw the screaming Dipper through the portal.
Pacifica tried to run towards the portal in an effort to save him, but it was too late, the portal had close and Dipper was never gonna be seen again.
Pacifica froze and drop to her knees where she started balling her eyes out with Dipper being gone off this world.
She looked at the King who was still pulling his signature sinister smile and he said to her, "I'll wait for many more years."
Pacifica only stayed on her knees when Gideon started dragging her away to the delivery van while the unicorns laughed at Pacifica's pain.
When Gideon rendezvoused with Grenda, McGucket, Candy and Ghost Eyes, they knew just by Pacifica's sad look that Dipper was gone and they were all equally saddened by it.
The delivery van swerved near them which was the go-ahead to get in and get out. Gideon jumped in the back with Pacifica with Mabel playing with the hair. She pulled an enthusiastic smile, thinking that everyone had returned. But when the Pines twin noticed that Dipper wasn't there, her smile disappeared and she asked Gideon where he went.
Gideon only replied with a sad look which made Mabel realise that Dipper was no longer on this world. The female Pines twin started tearing up along with Pacifica and pulled her would've-been-sister-in-law in a hug where they cried their eyes out.
Stan only looked back with sadness before driving away back to the Shack to deal with the unicorn hair. And he wasn't looking forward to telling Ford that his nephew suffered the same fate as him 31 years ago.
Epilogue
Dipper awoken on a sandy ground, feeling like he had just fallen out of the sky, which he had about 12 seconds ago. He noticed he was in a different world from the trees which looked purplish.
"What the?" Dipper asked.
"Hey guys, he's awaken!" Exclaimed a familiar voice.
Dipper froze when he heard the familiar voice of Bill Cipher but his fear disappeared when he realised it was a familiar dark furred dog creature with two horns and a wolf skull mask.
"So, you're human too?"
"What are you?" Dipper asked the creature.
"You're new here?" Asked an old woman with long grey hair, a golden eye iris on the right, a grey eye iris on the left and pale skin. She wore a three-toned maroon dress with mid-length sleeves, a ripped hem with light gray leggings and dark grey boots.
"Hey Luz, is that a human boy?" Asked a girl with light purple hair, black clothing, pale skin and pointy ears.
A girl with tan skin, purplish-brown/brownish-purple short hair styled in a pixie cut, and hazel eyes; wearing a pair of ebony earrings, a short-sleeved half-white and half-indigo hoodie with cat ears attached to the hood, high-waisted shorts, dark grey capris leggings, and a pair of white loafers; Smiled at Dipper and pulled him up.
"You okay?" The girl asked.
"I fell out of the sky." Dipper replied. "Judging by how I was laying on my back." Dipper then looked around the area and looked at the girl with a curious look. "Is this the boiling isles?"
"Oh, so you've heard of it?" The girl asked.
"Well, I was thrown in by unicorns." Dipper replied.
The older woman chortled and bumped the elvish girl with purple hair on the arm. "This kid sounds like he's drank way too much apple blood. Or was it orange blood?" The woman then started thinking for a moment before coming to a quick conclusion. "Maybe it was orange blood, that usually made me hallucinate."
"Eda, please." The girl with hazel eyes requested before smiling at Dipper again. "So, do you want to get home? Or did you come here to escape from a parent who…" The girl took a breath while thinking back to when she had to say goodbye to her mom. "….wanted what's best for you?"
"Well, I need to get home." Dipper replied. "There's a threat coming and I have to be there when he arrives and I think I'm gonna need the help I can get."
"Great, another human who wants to get home." The dog creature complained.
"King!" The girl chided. "Don't worry…."
"Dipper."
The girl chortled at Dipper's name. "Dipper, what a bizarre name. My name is Luz Noceda, the old foxy lady is Eda, the girl with purple hair is my awesome girlfriend, Amity…." Amity blushed when Luz referred to her by her title. "….And that cute little bundle of joy is King."
"Cute?!" King angrily exclaimed.
"And we're gonna get you home." Luz continued to assure Dipper who was unsure if he should be trusting these four strangers, but what choice did he have? He was in a world where he was alone and these four strangers what to help him. So the boy gave them a smile and a nod, ready to get on the way.