Chapter 22: Reunited

Our lovely protagonists flew over the countryside on the greasy back of Paap. Checkered fields and the occasional column of smoke stretched out before them, as far as the eye could see. The overcast day had a fearful mood, as if something terrible was about to happen.

"Where's the water? We've been flying for hours, I'm thirsty," Kakyoin yelled over the wind, digging around through the mess of bags on Paap's back. He didn't find anything, only socks and more socks.

"Why are there so many socks? Who packed these? And where's the water?" he asked, looking around at his windswept compatriots (but not windswept in a cool way, windswept as in they were all a hot mess).

"I thought you were in charge of food and water and stuff! You're the oldest," Aang moodily replied, clinging onto a skin flap of Paap's. Kakyoin whipped around faster than a horse with 50 legs.

"The oldest?! Are you trying to say I look older than Joseph?! He's literally in his 60s… you think I look older?!" Kakyoin whispered menacingly. Aang leaned backwards, in an effort to stay safe. Jotaro pushed him forward, because he didn't care about Aang's safety.

"Uh, listen Kakyoin, you may be a pog gamer, but you still look kinda old. And I packed the socks in case my feet got cold! But then I remembered that I don't have any more… Anyways, Joseph's, what, 28 at the oldest?"

Kakyoin lunged forward, intent on strangling Aang for that devastating insult, but he was prevented from doing this by Zuko.

"Kakyoin, stop strangling Aang. I, Zuko, Prince of the Fire Nation, son of-"

"Zuko, shut up about your titles! Get to the point!"

"Fine! Stop strangling Aang, we don't have time for you to get arrested and have to bail you out again like last time!"

Kakyoin glared resentfully at Zuko.

"Listen, pal, I had that situation fully under control. You just showed up and ruined it; I knew what I was doing!"

A hand crept up from the shadows, gently and sensually poking Zuko in the eye. It was Katara's hand.

"Oh my god, Zuko! When was Kakyoin in jail?! Tell me ALL about it. My tarot cards said something EXACTLY like that would happen!"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that. It would scar you. Actually, that reminds me of a really funny story from my youth, when my father, Ozai, burned my face off as if I were a worthless piece of trash, which maybe I am, but that's besides the point, Katara." said Zuko, laughing lightly at his childhood trauma.

Katara stared at Zuko with anger.

"You don't realize how close I am to the edge right now, Zuko."

"Well, Katara, speaking of the edge, if I was to tell you why Kakyoin got arrested, he would push us both over the literal edge, and we would fall screaming to our deaths. You can tell by the murderous look in his purple eyes."

Katara grumbled.

"I literally hate every one of you, except for Sokka. I cannot stand you." Using Star Platinum, she punched Paap in the face to release her anger. Paap screamed frenchly with pain, dipping down 20 feet before regaining altitude.

Good grief, Jotaro thought to himself, adjusting his hat with sadness. If I don't get my stand back soon, I'm sure my dear Papa would be disappointed-no. My long lost brother Jay would be disappointed! I have to find him! Or maybe not. Maybe he's aged badly, and sucks now.

Jotaro cleared his throat and looked at Katara.

"Katara, due to recent events, I want my stand back. Star Platinum, named for me by Mohammed Avdol."

Katara pouted.

"No." she said simply. Jotaro narrowed his eyes.

"Why not?" he asked.

"Cause you're ugly and I hate you." Katara replied angrily.

"Really. What's ugly about me?"

"You're hair. I hate the way it blends into your hat. I find it personally offensive." Katara stated, as if these facts were more obvious then that Caesar was a bleach blonde boi.

"Actually, if you buy me some rose quartz and some new Tarot cards, I'll give it back, ok? God knows I need some more rose quartz, with you people around."

Jotaro fainted with happiness. He believed crystals were a tool of the man (he still hadn't fully abandoned his dear Papa's views), but he really wanted his stand back.

Sokka sighed in a godly manner.

"Oi," he said. "Oi oi oi oi oi! We're at Ba Sing Se! I don't know how we got here, or why we got on Paap in the first place, but I guess we couldn't stay on Ember Island. Too much trauma. Plus Veronica Lodge, even though we defeated her. Well, technically Jet defeated her, but whatever. I sure am glad we ditched him."

Jumping off the back of Paap into the bustling center of Ba Sing Se, the Gaang looked around. They all almost had a heart attack, because it was so different from the last time they had been there. Hoards of the Unemployed roamed the streets, even more than on Ember Island. The buildings were all a dusty gray, and the smell of rot was in the air. The streets stretched into twisty little alleyways, rife with rats and unconscious bodies of sleeping Unemployed. All the windows in sight were broken, looking like sharp, hungry mouths in the buildings. Law and order seemed to be gone.

Regaining consciousness, Jotaro looked around at the destruction. Good Grief. Looks like I'm going to have a tough time finding a place to buy rose quartz, he thought, as a vendor shouting "Get your rose quartz and tarot cards here! Very cheap! Free, even! I am giving away free rose quartz and tarot cards!" walked directly past them. Man, this will be difficult. I don't think a single person in Ba Sing Se has even heard of Tarot cards and rose quartz.

Walking up to Jotaro with his cart, the vendor grabbed his hand, and while shaking it, asked, "Say, might you be interested in some-" he was interrupted by Jotaro punching him in the face.

"Shut up! I'm not interested in whatever you're trying to sell me! I should destroy your wares right here and now, just to teach you a lesson!"

"What?! No! I'm just selling-"

"Shut up!" Jotaro shouted, as he kicked the man's cart violently, shattering the rose quartz perched on top of it, and mangling the many decks of tarot cards. They scattered across the dirty street, now simply more litter to be trod underfoot.

The cart itself was also damaged beyond repair, as Jotaro was now punching it as hard as he could, and screaming, "ORA ORA ORA!" Without his stand, it didn't quite have the same effect.

The salesman stopped crying, as he had been since seeing the destruction of his items. He stared at Jotaro with shock.

"You… look so familiar… Almost like my long lost brother…"

Jotaro didn't respond; he was too busy doing his best to rip apart the wheels of the cart. He wasn't all that successful so far. The Gaang watched, entertained by this violent turn of events.

"P-please stop! My life is… a tragic story. Do not make me suffer any more! My small business is the only way i'm surviving!" The young man's eyes welled up with tears. Jotaro didn't notice, he was in a fit of rage. He just kept on kicking the cart, so the vendor began to speak, in the hopes of garnering sympathy.

"When I was a very young boy," the young man explained, "I knew that my destiny would take me away from my family. My mother, my father… and my brother. I loved my mother and brother more than anything in the world. But my father… was bloody bonkers, lads. He didn't want me to fulfill my destiny, as a master of Spinjitzu! When I was still very small, a man named Master Woooo told me he could train me, and help me fulfill my destiny. Of course, I knew I had to go with him! I tried to reason with my Dear Papa, but he wouldn't let me go. So one day… I ran. With my legs, which were longer than my brother's, as I was older than him. He ran after me, crying for me to return. Because a boy needs a brother, Frank. I felt horrible, leaving my dear little brother.

"But I couldn't let myself be weighed down by my past and my family. I had to be the blue ninja, it was my destiny! I went, and everything went well for years: I made friends with the other Ninja, Zane, Cole, and Kai. And Lloyd, after a while. I even found love, but then Nya broke up with me. And then everything went bad… Everything changed.

"The police came to our dojo one day, saying we weren't safe. When we asked why, they said that Master Wooooooo had killed the real Master Wu and stolen his identity, and that he was wanted in 52 different countries for war crimes. I guess we should have realized that earlier, given that none of us ever figured out how to do Spinjitzu, though we were all amazing at regular martial arts.

"So off I was sent into the wide world. I went back to my family home, thinking of what I would say to my Dear Papa and my little brother (because they would be the hard ones to deal with) but they were gone. Only my mother, Holly, was there, and what she told me broke my heart.

"She told me that Papa had been eaten by a lion, some years before, and that was deeply saddening. I had hated my Papa, and his crazy conspiracies, but he was still my father. But when she told me my brother was gone, that was the last straw. Mama said she had sent him and her father to Egypt, to deal with some vampire, because she wanted my brother out of the house. After all, Mama is a powerful force, she could deal with a vampire on her own without batting an eyelash of her hundreds of eyes.

"I fled the house, sobbing, and ran until I came to a dying rose-quartz and tarot card salesman. With his dying breath, he told me to carry on his business. I agreed, knowing that I could use such a portable business to search for my long lost brother. You haven't seen him, have you? He'd be about my age, a little younger. Probably very short, if he takes after our Papa, but with dark hair."

The Gaang gasped with shock, knowing that this must be Jay, Jotaro's long lost brother. Jotaro, however, did not pick up on this.

"Get out of my face, weirdo! I'm destroying your cart! Go away! I hope you don't have any family members, because they're probably as overdramatic as you are, and they probably go on and on about their dramatic family history! I can't stand people like that..." here he made eye contact with Zuko.

Jay got angry now.

"Listen here, you ugly rat-faced bowl! If you don't back away from my cart, I'll destroy the entire world with my good friend Bob and kill everyone!"

Jotaro stopped kicking the cart.

"...What?"

"I, Jay Kujo, called you an ugly rat faced bowl!"

"No, the other thing. Also, that's a dumb name. Thank God I'm not related to you… "

"...I don't think I said anything else."

"You said something else! You said you'd destroy the world and kill everyone with Bob! Why would you even make such a baseless threat? You're a street vendor. It's obvious that you have no way of 'killing everyone', so why would you even go with that threat?"

The street merchant saucily put his hands on his hips, and spat on the ground with rage and disgust.

"I said nothing of the sort. You're probably just insane," he declared, looking at the sky as if expecting rain.

Jotaro's eyes widened with rage.

"I'm insane?! No, you're insane!"

The street vendor refused to make eye contact with him.

"No, you're the insane one," the vendor said calmly, as if he were entirely above Jotaro.

Jotaro stepped on top of the wreckage of the cart, so he would then be above the vendor. It was now a battle of heights.

"I'm not insane! You're insane! You are!"

The street vendor smiled. Calling to Aang, he said, "Hey there, freakishly tall boy with the booty shorts and bell bottoms! If you pick me up and hold me very high, I'll give you 50 cents!"

Aang's faced contorted with greed, as his lust for gold took over all his other senses, knowing he could buy at least one V-buck with that. He grabbed the street vendor and put him on his shoulders, pushing him to the towering height of 12 feet in the air. Jotaro was now looking very small to the street vendor, which he was not happy about.

"How do you feel now, tiny man?! You look as short as my Papa, back when he was still alive, before he was eaten by that lion!" he shouted down to Jotaro.

Kakyoin sighed. It's time to step in, before they're both so high up they're out of the atmosphere. As interesting as that would be to see…

"Um, Jotaro?" Kakyoin said, stepping forward. "I think this guy is your broth-"

"Quiet, Kakyoin!" Jotaro shouted, as he climbed the nearest building in an effort to be taller. "I have to be taller, to assert dominance over this weirdo! Thank god he's only a random person on the street, not someone I'll have to ever see again, like a friend, or worse, a family member, or worse, my own brother!"

Kakyoin looked around for support from his fellow protagonists, but Aang was still holding up Jay, Katara was telling Joseph's fortune by reading his palm lines, Joseph was crying about his terrible fortune, Zuko was staring at Paap with horror and disgust as Paap consumed a passerby. Sokka was singing.

Kakyoin sighed. Maybe I should just tell them… better to just rip off the bandaid. Summoning all of the eldritch powers at his command, he spoke a series of words in Latin, as the ground opened up, and the clawed hands of the dead began to drag everyone nearby under, going first for Paap, as they knew that he was something that didn't belong in the land of the living, where things are good and light.

"Shoot, wrong spell," Kakyoin muttered. Throwing some frogs and eyeballs on the ground, the hands receded. But they didn't leave fully before dragging Aang halfway into the ground, so now he was just buried up to his waist in the dirt.

Everyone stopped what they were doing; irreversibly traumatized by what they had just seen. Kakyoin smiled and clapped his hands together.

"Great! Now that I've got everyone's attention, Jotaro, that's you're brother, Jay. And Jay, that's you're brother, Jotaro. It's a bit worrying that neither of you clued in, because it was super obvious, but yeah."

Jotaro and Jay just looked at each other.

"...Well that would explain why we have the same backstory," Jotaro said quietly, adjusting his hat.