Things You Are Not Allowed to Do at the SCP Foundation
DISCLAIMER: I do not earn any profit by writing this. It's just for fun. I don't own anything.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This one is rather specific to fans of the Tales From the SCP Foundation. I'd been thinking about this for a while, and after watching a couple of similarly themed videos on YouTube, I decided to go ahead with it. Let me know if I should keep it up. R&R.
Chapter 5
Sapient SCPs, specifically those that are human or humanoid, require special handling. This can entail anything from telling carefully structured lies to the SCP in question to avoiding certain, seemingly common-sense, actions while in their presence. While certain protocols are relaxed in the presence of some SCPs, with others, stricter than normal protocols must be observed, regardless of their class. If in doubt, consult individual containment procedures. They are in place for a reason.
61. Addressing certain SCPs by their given names is acceptable, given that it lowers their stress level, makes them more cooperative, and makes our work easier. However, becoming too familiar with some SCPs can be dangerous. It's been said before, but do not get overly friendly with SCP-953. She's a man eater. Literally.
62. The protocols for dealing with SCP-82, Ferdinand, are NOT relaxed. Being polite, providing him luxuries, and humoring his odd whims are matters of survival for those tasked with guarding him. Be polite if he invites you to dinner or you might end up on the menu.
63. SCP-5151 can be quite personable, but he has proven to be unpredictable. His versions of honor, justice and even common sense are radically different from your own. If they aren't, please report for psychological evaluation.
64. SCP-326 should not be addressed by her SCP number. It makes her angry. You wouldn't like her when she's angry.
65. For your own safety, please remember that SCP-5057, Senor Tasty, isn't.
66. SCP-56 is living proof that beauty is only skin deep. Do not let your guard down.
67. Sympathy for SCP-1060 is normal and understandable, but remember that she is only an ordinary person by day, and she refuses to believe she's dangerous. Female personnel, especially, should remember that she is.
68. SCP-881 is the result of an accident. The people of that community are just that. People. Not treating them as such, especially telling them that they are not people but 'research materiel' is forbidden. This is another example of relaxed protocols making our work easier. At the very least, it prevents open warfare.
69. SCP-86 has been quite useful, but it is still a poorly understood SCP. Treating it as a colleague could be very dangerous. Even SCP-86 understands this.
70. SCP-2241 is to be addressed by his name in an effort to keep him cooperative. His abilities and his desire to be a super-hero will make him a valuable asset someday, but right now, he's a dangerous brat. Patience is key here.
71. If you converse with SCP-1171, do not tell it you're human. The idiot bigot has been a font of useful information about his world.
72. SCP-3663 is one of those with relaxed protocols. He is docile and cooperative for the most part. It is best to keep him that way so that he doesn't wander off. Or scream. We still don't know what set him off last time.
73. SCP-2662 is not, by his choice, dangerous. Treating him as a person, despite his appearance, is part of the protocols. The world doesn't need protection from him. Like many of the other human SCPs, he needs protection from the world.
74. Remember that SCP-187 has been enormously useful to the foundation. Relaxed protocols keep her happy and cooperative and your future bright.
75. SCP-208, Bes, is an excellent medic and a boon to the SCP Foundation. Let's keep it that way.