His arm was around her shoulder, but she felt a million miles away. Her body was tense, reactions sharp and expressionless. Not only that, but she hadn't uttered a word to him since they had left. All he felt was terror and guilt. What if she didn't recover? It was his fault. He had put her through it to save her, and now she was in pain- not the kind you could fix with a bit of paracetamol, but deep emotional pain, and he couldn't do anything. He was distracted from his thoughts when he reached a side road, which he turned down before continuing to drive. He would help her. If he couldn't, he had no reason to live.
"We're here."
She got out of her seat, opened the door and walked towards the house without saying a single word.
"Hey, Mel, look at me."
She continued to stare at her feet. He unlocked the door and guided her towards one of the large sofas in the living room. Sitting next to her he cupped her face with his hand, and gently moved it to meet his gaze.
"What's wrong?"
She just gripped his wrist in response, biting down her lip so hard that a light trickle of blood fell from it. He gently wiped the blood away from her mouth, and lightly kissed her on the lips.
"It's okay," he reassured her. "Whatever happens, I will be there for you. I will never leave you because I love you, Mel and we will get through this together."
"I love you to Phil, and. And I'm sorry."
"No, don't be sorry, you have nothing to apologize for."
"I'm sorry," she said again.
He just silenced her by wrapping her in his arms and waiting for her to fall asleep. He stroked her hair and told her he loved her over and over again until he fell asleep.
Natasha knocked on the door and waited for 2 minutes, then 3, then 4. Still no response. She eventually opted to just open the door, and when she entered, she found the room empty. Not what she was expecting. Skye entered afterwards, saw the same thing and suddenly started crying.
"They left, didn't they?" she sobbed. "Everyone always leaves me. Am I damaged?"
"No Skye, you are a beautiful, strong, kind human being. They didn't leave because of you, and they will be back. SHIELD is their lives. They wouldn't quit like that. No. They will be back, and I will train you until then."
"Okay."
Coulson woke up, his body slightly stiff from the position he had slept in last night. His arms were empty, but that wasn't unusual, as she always got up at insane times to do Tai Chi. He lay there for a few minutes before easing himself off the couch- which although originally seemed comfortable, was less so once he had spent the night on it. He moved towards the kitchen, but his blood ran cold when he reached the table. The room was empty, and the kitchen table was adorned with a single piece of paper. He was almost scared to read it, but he did. Carefully unfolding it, he began to read the curly script that covered the page in front of him.
Dear Phil,
I'm sorry that I can't be there for you anymore and beg you to understand that this is on no part your fault. I will always love you but under no circumstances could I ever deserve you, and the happiness that that entails. I hope you can move on and be happier without me, and I'm so sorry that I kept so many secrets and told so many lies. It is most likely that I will never see you again, so I guess this is goodbye. I hope over time that you can forget about me and be happier with someone else. Look after Skye, and make sure she gets her training and becomes an agent. Tell her I will always be proud of her and that I love her. I enclosed my SHIELD ID and resignation. I'm sorry.
Love Melinda.
Silent tears streamed down his face as he read over the words over and over again, smudging the elegant writing across the page. She thought she didn't deserve love or happiness. How could she think that? They were going to get married. They were going to be happy. Now they were both alone again. Not being able to stay in the house anymore, he got into Lola and flew back to the tower. His whole family were still there. He had nothing here anymore.
Jarvis alerted Stark when Lola pulled into the garage, and he let out a sigh of relief. He thought that Phil Coulson had just run away with his sister and hadn't been happy about it.
"You're back."
"Yeah," Coulson replied sadly.
"Where is Melinda?"
"Where is she?"
"Phil Coulson where is my sister!"
"Gone," Coulson finally replied. "She left with no trace of where she was going and a short note. She didn't think she deserved happiness, so she left, and when she doesn't want to be found she won't be. Doesn't stop us from spending all of our resources looking but we almost certainly won't find her."
"Well call Fury. I'll put every satellite I have on it, and you get every agent SHIELD can spare. We have to find her!" Stark ordered.
"On it," Coulson muttered.
"They're back," Natasha said to Skye, when she got a message from Jarvis saying that Lola had parked in the garage.
"Really?" Skye asked, hopefully.
"Well, unless someone has stolen Lola, then yes they're back."
Skye rushed down to the garage, only to find Stark and Coulson, very much alone. She just stopped and stared at them. Natasha, who had been following Skye, saw the girl shatter. If she had been upset before, this would have broken her. Probably the realization that Melinda wasn't coming back. It hit a hard punch on Natasha as well. May hadn't even said anything, she just left before even checking everyone was okay. They had but everything they had into the search but now all they could do was wait for a lead. The base had fallen silent, and everyone was either in random sitting rooms throughout the tower or in their bedrooms.
Coulson stared at the badge in his hand. Agent Melinda May. Level eight. Issued by Director Margret Carter. She had just given it all up. SHIELD was her life. How could she even do it? It was his fault. He should have been more careful. He shouldn't have let her leave.
The search continued for weeks, but no leads were found. Agents were gradually taken off the case as months went by. He constantly argued with Fury over it, but after 6 months of no leads, Fury closed the case, set them up as a mobile unit again (with Natasha as replacement pilot), and started sending them on missions. It was just before a simple mission on the centipede case when they received a message. It was imbedded into files in the holotable, so when they activated it to see the serum updates, it was there, displayed over and over again in small but readable letters. Ward Is Hydra. Natasha pulled a gun on him, and before he could react, she had iced him and tied him up. When they dropped him off at the fridge, Fury changed their mission- locate Hydra moles inside SHIELD. After a year of gradually crossing off moles, SHIELD collapsed.
There were too many Hydra agents, so they took a small group of loyal high-ranking agents and took them to a secret base. Fury stepped down, and the new SHIELD leadership was built, with Coulson as Director. Hill took the position of acting deputy director, as he refused to give away the position that should have been May's, Hand, Morse and Romanoff made up the level 8s, Hartley, Hunter and Trip the level 7s, Skye, Fitz and Simmons the level 6s, and a few units of younger agents making up levels 1-5. It was working for them, but Coulson was still trying to find May. There was always at least one unit on satellite surveillance, although their original team were still sent on priority missions. They were away at the moment. Tracking a woman who kept killing off their leads. They would be fine- take her in and put her in holding. They would interrogate her within a few days and then hand her over to the FBI, or CIA, or really whoever was interested. That was how SHIELD worked now.
Skye, Fitz, Simmons, Natasha and Trip were all in a Quinn jet travelling towards their mission location. It was simple- go in, get the target and bring her in uninjured. They were all armed with icers and had agreed to take the first shot they got. Although it was a simple mission, the target was very skilled, and they would stand no chance if they were noticed. The location was a party, so they were all dressed in outfits that allowed them to blend in- Natasha, Skye and Simmons in short dresses, and Fitz and Trip in suits. Coulson was running surveillance from the base.
"Target is in the basement. Heat signatures look like she's interrogating someone else. Orders remain, get in get her and leave. Take the second person if you can."
"Copy that," Skye responded, before exiting the Quinn jet along with the rest of the team. They walked towards the door and let themselves in the door using the fake Id's that Skye had made in advance. After spending enough time at the party to be unsuspicious, they one by one, slipped down the side corridor and met outside the door where their target was. Raising their icers, they carefully entered the room. They were a moment too late to shoot. As the woman noticed them, she drew the sword that was concealed in her skirt and ran the tip across the other unidentified person's throat. They all shot at once, and she crumpled to the floor. She seemed interestingly easy to take in, Skye noted. She hadn't even tried to take them out, even though she probably could have. Skye reached down and took her Sword and ID from her crumpled form, while Trip slung her over his shoulder.
"We have an ID. Her name is Marya Morozova."
"No gun, only a small knife and that sword."
"Impressive sword," Fitz pointed out, looking at the balance of the elegant weapon, and intricate carvings around the hilt. "Vibranium," he added as he further examined the weapon.
"That should make it easier to trace right?"
"A sword like this is not even legal. It would have to have been made on the black market, so it would be easier just to go off the ID, and the details I can find by examining this, and what she gives us in the interrogation."
"We should get back to base then."
Finding a back entrance, they made their way to the Quinn jet with little difficulty, making it back to base before the woman woke up. Trip took her down to the holding cell, while Daisy reported to Coulson and Fitzsimmons headed to the lab to examine the sword.
"Debrief?" Coulson asked as Skye entered the room.
"Mission went as planned. We were unable to get the other man because she slit his throat as we came, but she is in the basement, and we recovered her ID and weapons. Her name is Marya Morozova. That is all we have so far."
"Thank you, Skye, I'll put Bobbi and Natasha on the interrogation. Find anything you can on the internet about Mariya Morozova."
"Yes, Sir."
"Bobbi, we are on the interrogation," Natasha told the taller agent as she headed to the holding cell.
"What's your tactic?"
"I'll see what is most effective once we have spoken to her."
I'm sorry I took so long to get this chapter up. I will try and get the next chapter up by the end of December, but I will probably write some Christmas and New year one-shots in between, so please prompt. I posted a ficlet a few about a week ago, so please check it out. Thank you for being patient and sticking with this story, and please let me know what you think below. Also, happy December :)