AN: LexCook: Thank you for the great review!

It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do
To look you in the eye
And tell you I don't love you
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie

to show no emotion when you start to cry

It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do
To turn around and walk away pretending I don't love you

The Hardest Thing

"That isn't a problem is it?" Steve asked

"This is not good!" Kelly bleated almost to herself, shaking her head

"Why?" Steve observed her demeanor

"What do you mean why?!" Kelly snapped. Steve remained silent.

"Because he'll tell Brenda!" Kelly huffed before mumbling to herself "...and she already knows."

"Knows what?" Steve cocked an eyebrow

"I don't know what I'm doing here." Brenda blurted out as soon as Rick opened the door.

"That's okay." He assured, happy to see her.

"I was on my way home and I wound up here." She sighed once she entered and sat on his couch.

"Maybe this is where you should be." He sat beside her.

"No... " She shook her head, "I've thought about being here many times, and I always stopped myself. My family is everything to me. I should be where they are. No matter what's between us... I will always put my son first. I'd always put Dylan first."

"I understand." Rick nodded slowly

She scoffed to herself. "...I've always put Dylan first. Over my dad, over my friends... since I was 17... my life has been about Dylan."

Rick remained silent. Brenda continued to ponder that thought.

"...I'm thinking of leaving." She finally breathed out.

Rick looked up at her, hopeful.

"But my son." She whispered

"Bren, look at me." Rick pulled her chin up to face him. "This is what I love about you. When you love, you love fiercely. Maybe it's time to love yourself fiercely, and... allow someone to love you that way too."

"I don't know" She sounded doubtful.

"If you're happy, your son will be happy." He affirmed.

"Knows what?" Steve probed and Kelly let out a deep breath. "Oh no." Steve shook his head, realizing what this possibly meant. "What else did Dylan do?"

"Steve, keep your voice down." Kelly groaned.

"Kelly... What's going on between you and Dylan?" He said sternly

"Nothing." She hissed in a whisper

"I know that look..." Steve paused, "You're still in love with him."

"Well, you don't have to worry because he's not in love with me... It doesn't matter." She shook her head anxiously, making sure not to tear up before gaining composure.

"I heard my dad's name." James said from the couch as Steve and Kelly continued to have their discussion in the kitchen. While they couldn't quite catch what they were saying, they could tell the discussion was heavy. Pamela struggled to make out the words herself. She then observed James, who seemed confused.

Pamela sighed deeply, "Listen, James..." She hesitated between a long pause, "I care about you a lot. And even though we're just friends now, I don't want to lie to you."

"Okay..."

"I think... I think there's something between my mum and your dad." She murmured

"What?" James fumed

"I'm not saying anything's happened or anything like that." She quickly interjected, "But... I think my mum's not over him."

"Well which is it?!" Brandon snapped

"Brandon... " Dylan huffed. "I really think this is between me and your sister."

"Like hell it is." He sneered, "My whole family have gone out of their way to be accommodating, making you one of our own... And because we're brothers, I stood by and let you have your way. Not this time." He shook his head.

"I love your family." Dylan insisted with a sincere, quiet drawl. "They're my family. They are the last people I'd wanna hurt."

"And yet, they're the people you continue to hurt."

Just then, Brenda opened the front door to find them both standing there. They both turned to face her.

"What's going on?" She eyed them cautiously

"You gonna catch her up or should I?" Brandon provoked

"Brandon." Dylan sighed, closing his eyes for a moment, agitated.

"No, no. Don't look at the floor, look at her." Brandon ordered, "Look her in the eye and tell her what's going on."

"Brandon, what are you doing?" Brenda turned to her brother

"Not now, Bren." Brandon warned. "Dylan." He urged firmly.

Dylan let out an exhausted sigh, before uttering "I slept with Kelly."

"I know." Brenda crinkled her forehead

"What?" Brandon looked over to his sister, astonished

"She knows." Dylan repeated.

"You knew?" Brandon hissed, "And you." He turned back to Dylan, "After all these years... you'll never change." Brandon shook his head, "Come on, Bren. You and Jimmy can stay with me."

"No." Dylan said defiantly, "You don't have the right to make decisions here. This is my family."

"My nephew isn't going through what you've put the rest of us through." Brandon warned

"Don't talk to me about my son, alright?" Dylan growled, "Worry about your own son! I spend more time with him than you do!"

In that instant, Brandon furiously got up in Dylan's space. Before things could get heated, Brenda jumped in between them and yelled out. "Enough!"

Brandon stepped back and Dylan glared at him.

"Look." Brenda said breathlessly, "Brandon, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but go home. Dylan's right. It's between us."

Brandon scoffed before he left. Once the door closed behind him, Brenda made her way to the couch to gather her thoughts. Dylan followed suit.

Standing before her, he lowered down to sit on the coffee table opposite her. "So... what now, Bren?" He asked softly

"You tell me."

"Where've you been?" He asked

"I... went to see Rick."

"Really?" He scoffed, turning away from her.

"I'm just being honest."

"That's how you're going to deal with this then? Run off with another guy?!" Dylan shook his head.

"At least I'm still wearing my underwear." She spat

Dylan let out a deep, frustrated breath and backed down. He then got up to leave, heading for the bedroom.

"Wait." She called back, getting up to follow him. "I don't want to keep saying things like that... Sit down." She said softly as she made her way to the dining table.

Dylan took a moment before joining her. He finally pulled up a chair and turned to face her.

And baby it's killing me, it's killing you

I've made up my mind
There is no turning back
She's been good to me
And she deserves better than that