Deer (or some things I hate about you. )

"Oh, chère you've cut the vegetables wrong," Remy said peeking his head over her shoulder.

"Did I cut the vegetables wrong? How do you cut vegetables wrong, Remy?" she asked laying the knife down on the chopping board, remembering that her husband had no healing factor.

"You've cut them in Brunoise and for stew, you cut them in bandelettes," he added crossing his arms over his chest. He looked really disappointed.

"Remy, I don't even know what you're saying."

This man was very sensitive when it came to cooking.

"I told you how I wanted the vegetables," he insisted pointing to the chopping board where a pile of bell pepper and onions were piled.

"No, you didn't," she replied holding back the urge to throw the damn vegetables over his head.

"Maybe you didn't hear me," he clenched his teeth.

"Or maybe you think you say things you don't say," Rogue retorted using the same insolent tone he had used with her.

"Or maybe you'd better stay out of my kitchen,"

"Or maybe I'll go down and eat at the Chinese place down the street," she replied defiantly.

"Très bien, bon apetit".

"Don't use French when we argue."

"Well chère, it's my language," he said moodily raising his tone just enough to piss her off.

" Well then, vous allez dîner seul et probablement dormir seul." she said, leaving her apron on the counter and walking out the door.

" D'accord.," she heard him shout from the kitchen as she walked away through the house.

He loved her hair, always had. He loved the feel of it and the smell of it. Partly because for years it was the only part of her he could touch.

Turning something that for any other couple was trivial into something intimate. So much so that he felt like a small betrayal when she cut it off.

He loved her hair, what he never imagined was that he would hate living with it.

There was Rogue's hair everywhere, on the floor, on the pillow, in the shower. Oh, the shower was terrifying. There was so much hair he feared it would one day come to life and eat one of the cats.

And not that they had much time to clean up either, but Rogue could avoid leaving hairs sticking to the shower wall.

Today he had found one shaped like a heart. Maybe this was his dear wife's idea of romance.

Maybe he should pick them all up and serve it up like a plate of spaghetti.

The bathroom light was on. It was on and no one was in there. It wasn't that hard to turn it off, just flip the switch. But Remy LeBeau didn't know how to use them. Apparently.

"Do you work for National Grid, Sugah?" she asked leaning her arms on the back of the couch where her beloved husband was watching a basketball game.

"What?" he asked confused without looking away from the TV. He'd probably bet something with Logan. They loved it, it was never about the money. It was about seeing who was right.

"You left the bathroom light on, again," she said pinching his cheek to get his attention at least he could look at her. "Last week you left it on for three days."

"Don't worry, we can pay for it," he said grabbing her hand to kiss it.

"Not the planet," she replied kissing his head.

When he arrived home he found Rogue in the guest room. All her clothes were there, the purses, the shoes. Everything.

She was cleaning the closet thoroughly and arranging the shelves to her liking.

For some stupid reason, she had decided that they would no longer share a bedroom and for some stupid reason, she had decided not to tell him why.

"Are you moving out?" asked Remy leaning against the door. "I didn't do anything," Remy said in a defensive tone, he had no idea what this was all about.

"Huh?" Rogue asked stepping away from the closet still holding the rag in her hand. "You don't want me to use this closet?"

"You can do whatever you want," he growled in a bad mood.

"It doesn't look like it," she replied defensively throwing the rag into the closet.

"This is unnecessary and especially not when I have no idea why," Remy said unable to hide his temper.

"I wanted some space," Rogue replied crossing her arms.

"Great,"

She stared at him in disbelief, looking hurt, then turned her back to him and grabbed a handful of clothes in her arms.

"Well, if it's such a big deal to you, I'll take the clothes back to the bedroom closet, but at least tidy up yours," she said in barely a whisper.

"What?" Remy asked confused.

"You're such a mess, it's all jumbled up, I can't even find my clothes, I just wanted to get my clothes tidy..." she looked at all her clothes on the bed and sighed. "It makes me anxious to see it all in disarray..."

The truth was that Rogue sorted her clothes almost obsessively, not only by clothing pieces but also by colors and shades of color.

And he was a bloody mess.

"Are you just moving your clothes?" he asked taking a step into the room.

"What else was I going to move?" said Rogue laying the clothes back on the bed, not taking her eyes off the mess.

Stupid conclusions lead to stupid fights. Luckily, Rogue isn't in fight mode this time.

"You can have every closet in the house," Remy sighed moving closer to her and kissing her forehead. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his head on hers. "Every single one of them."

"Is something wrong?" she replied returning his hug and looking at him worriedly.

"No," he whispered.

"Oh lord, did you think I was leaving our room?" she asked trying not to burst out laughing.

"No," he lied pressing her against him.

"Oh Sugah, I sure screwed up your head,"

She walked into the house with the mail in her hand, her husband was sitting on the floor playing with the cats. He smiled wide at the sight of her.

She squatted down to greet the kitties and ended up sitting next to him.

"Remy why did a traffic fine for your bike come in my name?" she asked reading one of the letters.

"Oh, I'm sorry I forgot to tell you when I renewed the bike insurance I put it in your name," he said taking the paper from her hands to see the amount he had to pay.

"You what?" she asked in disbelief.

"Look Rogue, I had to renew the traffic insurance and all the insurance companies were charging me an outrageous amount, I'm in the most expensive bracket,"

"Maybe it's because you're a lousy driver?" she asked, reading the traffic report again. "145mph Really? I didn't even know your bike could go that fast."

"It's a great bike," he said proudly.

"That's not the point. Why did you put me as the insurance holder?"

"It's cheaper," he added with a shrug.

"Remy you're rich!" She exclaimed indignantly.

"The insurance companies more! They're all a scam. I'm stealing from the rich!

"O wow. You're Robin Hood!"

"Sorry, I should have told you," he said hugging her. Wearing his best-abandoned puppy face.

"Yes, you should have. Now I'll have to pay more on my insurance for your fines," she grumbled trying to resist the power of his cuddles.

" Baby, you don't have insurance or even a car," he whispered in her ear as he gave her little kisses on her neck.

" Because I'm basically immortal and I can fly," she grumbled.

"Then why do you sulk,?" he chuckled resting his nose against her cheek.

"I don't sulk," she added crossing her arms.

"Yes you do, doesn't she buddies?" he said scooping Oli up in his arms. "Roguey's a grouch," he added hitting her in the face with the cat's paws.

"Don't turn the cats against me," she took the cat out of his hands and put it on her lap.

"I don't think that's possible."

Someone once told her that being with Remy would be easy because he wasn't an argumentative person. Well, he didn't argue with them. Because he did with her.

They hadn't spoken since morning. It was his usual tactic. Silence and she hated it. Remy had the facility to do it. For her, however, it was a nightmare. She felt more comfortable arguing, even though she usually lost. Due to the demon silver tongue, she had married.

Remy was reading a book while she fiddled with her cell phone. Ignoring each other. Actually, he was ignoring her. She would glance at him from time to time.

She hated it when he did that.

She turned off the light on her nightstand and slipped into the sheets, her back to him.

Remy kept reading for a good while longer, until he turned out the light too.

"Why are we angry?" Rogue asked when Remy got into bed.

She felt how he rolled over and exhaled a long sigh.

"Because we had an argument," he said in an apoplectic sigh.

She turned around to face him. Remy reached out and caught a lock between his fingers.

"You'll be mad if I tell you I don't remember why anymore, I've had a shitty week and I'm exhausted..." she sighed placing a hand on his cheek.

"Me too, but I think something about some veggies" he whispered, still playing with her hair. He smiled and moved to be closer to her.

"That's a really stupid reason to fight," Rogue added resting her forehead on his.

"It is."

"It's not the real reason though"

"Isn't it?" asked Remy, he gave her a worried look and she smiled sweetly, kissing his lips.

"We're very stubborn, we always want to win, We're like two rutting deer fighting over territory" she explained

"Deer?" Remy raised an eyebrow in disbelief and let out a nervous laugh.

"I watched a silly documentary about animal life..."

"You saw a documentary about deer and thought of us? " he asked hugging her.

"I'm sorry for being so grumpy," she mumbled in embarrassment.

" I' m sorry for being so picky," he said in the same tone of voice, nuzzling her hair.

"Well, what do you say about make-up sex," Rogue said tugging on the elastic of his boxer briefs.

" That's the best part of fighting with you,"