Ever since that day on the battlements nothing has been the same, as if the two sisters transformed into light and darkness itself.
Despite everything Elaina had warned morgana about, such as Morgause using her as a tool for her own means, forsaking all the people she had known, morgana still remained loyal to her.
events saw that Morgause lit the fires of idirsholas to claim the throne, awakening the deadly knights of medhir and morgana became the vessel of a spell that put all those around her to sleep. Elaina had been such a victim and when she awoke, morgana was gone and neither Arthur nor merlin could tell her what had happened, though she made countless guesses without use of her magic.
but she could feel that Morgana was well and in the keeping of Morgause.
Elaina might have been the one to sever her link between herself and her sisters, refusing to follow where they led, yet the loneliness was almost too painful to handle. Sometimes she cried herself to sleep with the sorrow of wanting to be with them. Her visions igniting images of their childhood and that blissful moment of peace she shared with Morgause when she challenged Arthur.
What truly tested her resolve was when merlin finally admitted to her what he did the day of morgana's disappearance.
He poisoned her so that the sickness would die with her and somehow he believed it would make Morgause put a stop to the fires and the knights at her command. Elaina had called him all the names under the sun, that he would dare take her sister away after all she had done to preserve her life.
But a few days later it occurred to her. If She had asked morgana once if she would be willing to kill in order for the old religion to reign, then it worked both ways.
So, would she Elaina daughter of gorlois, be willing to kill for the sake of Albion?
Fortunately, she has never had to. Merlin took that burden and it must have been hard for him to have made that decision regarding morgana and she was glad that she had not been the one in his shoes. It was an insult for all he had done to be angry with him. He did what he had to so that Elaina didn't need to make any more sacrifices for the sake of the future they wanted to see be realised.
With that in mind she forgave him, assuring merlin that he did not have morgana's blood on his hands. That she actually lived, just not as the same person they had known and been fond of.
And if it was to come down to life or death again; then the morgana they knew did not exist. She was killed by her inclination and she was an enemy, the same as any other, moulded into the ideal apprentice by Morgause upon her 'unexpected' and 'miraculous' return to Camelot.
So, if there was a cause to preserve Camelot at the cost of morgana or Morgause, then Elaina gave her permission to repeat his actions if need be, as this would let it be so that they shared in the burden this time.
Within the first few days of Morgana's reappearance, Elaina had thought they would have to make good on that oath but morgana has avoided fault in everything she has done and what she clearly intends. Uther is just as devoted to her as he was before only now, she was using that as leverage and playing him the fool.
But it has not gone unnoticed the rift between the sisters. When they were in the same room people were almost uneasy at the tension they created between them. It wasn't born of rivalry or sibling squabbles. You could actually feel the distain that prevented them from speaking, or from sharing their meals, or going about the gardens…
It was almost as if they were not sisters at all.
No one in the castle suffered more from this change than Arthur, who was none the wiser of the true reasoning for the sister's coldness. Thus, he made it his mission to see them reunite and where better to start than horse riding, their love in life.
"Elaina it will be fun. We haven't all gone out on the horses together in what a year?"
Arthur was chasing her as she walked down the hallway, barely giving him enough attention to show she was the least bit interested. Had the offer been just the two of them, then of course she would gladly take him up on it but why would she want to endure morgana's smug grin and digs. She wouldn't have a moments peace in wondering what schemes she was conjuring.
Elaina was never relaxed and constantly on edge. Any little wrongdoing, she automatically assumed morgana was behind it which was why the atmosphere was always so sour when they were in each other's company. But how could she possibly explain that to anyone besides Gaius and merlin who shared in the anxiety she instilled.
Arthur cut her path and held out his arm against the wall to stop Elaina in her tracks.
She glared at him madly, jabbing at his ribs that made him jolt but not faulter.
"well, I've been otherwise engaged!"
He opened his mouth to say something but then morgana swept in, with her hair braided down the length of her back and in a stunning green gown. A beauty whose core was blackened. A waste of potential if you asked Elaina. The world could have been morgana's, regardless of her magic.
"Arthur if she doesn't want to come then leave her where she is. No point wasting your energy. You and I can go alone."
She antagonised Elaina by that last remark, knowing what little trust her sister carried for her. Elaina couldn't understand this arrogance, because as clever as she thought herself and Morgause to be, they hadn't had much success yet which they needed reminding of.
Elaina charged and hit Arthur's arm forgetting it was there, which was lucky because it was keeping her at bay from morgana. Instincts of childhood fights which they had until then avoided, were now beginning to surface making Elaina want to pull morgana's hair or turn her cheek red with a handprint. Anything to try and make morgana see sense again and also to release all the pent-up rage Elaina held inside.
"no, the whole point of this is to be together! Honestly, I don't know what it is between you two but it has to stop."
Insync, the sisters replied, 'I don't know what you mean', and even that coincidence was a source of annoyance for them.
"really, because Gwen would say different. Honestly she feels like there is some side she has to take, in an argument no one knows anything about!"
Unfortunately, the past of trying to keep her workload down hasn't lasted during this rift. Gwen was torn between attending to two women, who refused to be in the same space as each other and she had to equal her time between them.
It was a lot to take on and it wasn't fun anymore. She actually felt for the first time that her service was an actual job. She cared for each sister but sometimes she didn't want to wake up and come to the castle. All it entailed was morgana's sly remarks towards her sister, or Elaina's utter indifference to life at the present. When the serving girl had tried to breach the matter with Elaina, she just dismissed her help in anything she thought herself capable of doing herself to avoid any further quizzing.
There was something more to their story neither was telling and how right Gwen was.
"well I have tried Arthur, but Elaina…"
She let the sentence drift off insinuating that she had tried to make the non-existent amends, when neither party has attempted because they could not admit they were wrong in the cause that was keeping them apart.
"please Elaina. For me; father has been on my case lately and I just want some free time with you and morgana, having fun like we used to."
Elaina had to admit that a guilt for Arthur being caught in the middle of this had nestled its way into her conscious and he wasn't any the wiser as to why. What good would it do him to tell of morgana's intentions. Elaina wasn't exactly sure he would believe her, because she wouldn't have if the roles were reversed.
As well as polishing up on her magic, Morgana had become an excellent actress using her past as a shield and a persona to draw inspiration from and she could cry at command, which was a new development for all she had endured after her 'kidnapping'. Honestly, she just needed the official ceremony for sainthood in Camelot, since she had them so convinced of her pious nature.
It would only turn against Elaina if she tried anything. Morgana had threatened her with that very fact, rubbing in how very little influence she had in the castle. Morgana always had a voice on affairs if she cared to give it, a point she made use of now more than ever. Whereas Elaina, her place was stand and look pretty, to be seen and not heard. Whenever she did make a comment the king and council actually had the audacity to act surprise by the wisdom to come from her mouth. Although even then it would be ignored and only Arthur would agree with her or try and persist what she said had merit.
No claim of hers would be valid, only morgana's golden word.
"you, me, morgana and merlin?"
Elaina would stop the whole thing if merlin wasn't there to protect Arthur. It would ease her nerves with him present and the more bodies, the less chance morgana would pull something, less someone catch her in the act.
Arthur beamed and scuttled away to make the preparations before she could change her mind, taking the question for as good as an agreement as he was likely to get.
"well of course merlin, who else is going to carry the food."
Elaina groaned. More and more this castle was becoming a prison, which she didn't wish to leave because to do so would mean that Arthur was vulnerable without an army at his disposal. So, she tried to get him to stay safe within its walls as much as she could, where she could keep an eye on him, thus trapping herself inside as well.
"oh, and how about Gwen, a good handful of guards, with some added blood thirsty dogs for company as well while we're at it!"
He didn't hear that last bit, but he wasn't meant to. Elaina had directed it at morgana and exaggerated her signature smirk right back at her, to see how she liked to be threatened. The lady only rolled her eyes and went to get to ready, leaving Elaina to stare on after her already dreading the ride.
when they did venture outdoors, the crisp air and change in scenery was just wasted on Elaina as she was alerted by the slightest of things, she thought might indicate danger. The pressure was suffocating; yet merlin carried it so effortlessly. He didn't allow it to affect him as it did her.
but then these dangers Arthur did face, Elaina blamed only herself for them. Because she was the one to have created the monster morgana was becoming. She deserved this no matter how hard it was to bear.
her payment for the sin, will be to keep Arthur safe and breathing, while she struggled for air.