Angel wasn't exactly sure what had happened, but near the end of the ceremony the air seemed to shift around Buffy. He'd tried to whisper over to her to see what was on her mind but she just shook her head and squeezed his hand for a moment.

He tried twice then let it drop for now. He himself ignored any questioning looks coming from Cordelia up at the front of the church.

Buffy hadn't been wrong, he didn't exactly like weddings. He thought they were lovely and beautiful, sure, but he always felt out of place among so many people looking all formal and proper. Somewhere along the way he started zoning out a little, thinking back to his and Buffy's small wedding many moons ago. He smiled, replaying it over in his head but soon a deep sadness washed over him. He wondered if Buffy was going through the same beside him.

Angel looked down at his hand. It had been a long time since he had worn a ring on that finger. His chest tightened as he suddenly missed it. Clearing his throat and sat up straighter, pushing those thoughts away and trying to just enjoy the wedding before him.

OoOoO

"I'll be back," Buffy whispered as she tried to hurry past him. Angel's eyes squinted and he called her name but she held up a hand. "I just need a minute," she told him and went in the opposite way than the crowd. Angel watched as she went out of the front doors behind them. His eyes continued to stare at the door until Jesse started talking to him. "I'm gonna wait on her, we'll be down in a few," he told his friend.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, see you in a bit. Tell Cordelia to save a dance for me," he said with a wink.

"Oh, I'm sure she will be down there waiting for you," Jesse laughed and waved his fingers behind his head as he walked off. Soon the room was silent and empty. Angel glanced around the large room before taking a seat. His fingers tapped against the cushion below him as he waited.

A few minutes passed before Angel dared to stand and go look for Buffy. He squinted as the bright sun hit his eyes but it didn't take much looking around for him to find her. "I shouldn't have come."

Buffy glanced at him, her jaw seemed to clench for a moment but she waved him off. "It's fine, Angel," she told him. "I just needed a moment... I was just thinking about the past and suddenly very overwhelmed with everything that has been going on. It's catching up to me that you're... here. That you're back anywhere in my life at all."

Angel stepped down a few of the large cement steps and took a seat beside her. "I kind of figured. My head was in the same space in there."

"This isn't the place for it, or the time, but God how I want to scream out 'What the hell are we doing' and that this is all insane."

Angel nodded. "We will have that talk, Buffy. I promise." He could tell she wanted to say something, though. He sat there beside her for a few more moments then, "Get it out," he urged.

Buffy let out a slow, shaky breath. "Fred and Gunn... they are so perfect for each other, they are so in love. They're going to make this work, you couldn't convince me otherwise. But... that is exactly what I felt when we got married, too. I remember being so happy that day and just knowing you and me... we were going to be spending the rest of our lives together. And then all of it wound up going to hell in a hand basket and I wasn't prepared for that. I feel like for the most part I just shut down and we worked so hard to remain civil and wrap it all up in a pretty bow. But it sucked, Angel. It is crappy as hell that we ended."

"I'm not arguing that. Buffy, losing you was the worst thing that ever happened to me and probably ever will. Which just made all of this... with Cordelia and Jesse and the date... and last night... it's all a crazy whirlwind and I'm afraid to take the breath, to stop and think about it."

"Cordelia is going to be losing her mind downstairs waiting on us," Buffy finally said, a chuckle in her voice.

"Kind of afraid to that, too."

Buffy laughed and they agreed to put the elephant in the room off to the side for a little bit longer. Angel stood and held a hand out for her, helping her up then they made their way downstairs to where the reception was being held.

OoOoO

"Fancy seeing you here."

Angel turned around, smiling as big as possible. "Cordelia! You look beautiful as always."

"Well, thank you... but what are you doing here?"

"I was invited."

"Mmhmm. And a little birdie told me you and Buffy came here together." Angel's eyes darted over to where said bird was. Jesse made a clenched teeth face at him. "And I can't help but notice you're wearing the same clothes as yesterday." Angel stayed silent, leading her out on to the floor. He met Buffy's eyes for a brief moment. She gave an encouraging smile. They'd both been making a game of dodging her since making it downstairs. "Anything you want to fill me in on?" Cordelia pressed on.

"Maybe I had nothing clean to wear?"

"Is that what happened?"

He chuckled. "Not exactly."

"Hmm. Imagine that. Sooo..."

"I didn't make it home last night," he finally said. "And I didn't have time to swing by and grab something else to wear before coming here."

"You left with Buffy last night."

"We decided to share a cab, yes."

"And you didn't go home last night?"

"No."

Cordelia thought that over for a moment as they danced. "Angel?"

"Yes?"

"Did you spend the night with Buffy last night?"

Angel cleared his throat. "Yes."

Cordelia stopped and stared at him. "Like, stayed the night stayed the night?" she asked, her voice a little lower.

"Yes."

Cordelia's brown eyes widened and she did a little jump. "Yes!" she cheered. "Oh, I have to go find Buffy." she said in a rush then turned, her eyes scanning for the blonde. "We will talk more about this later but she gets to be first." She turned around for just a moment. "I told you!" she said in a very sing-song type of tone.

"Cordelia, that doesn't mean..." he tried yelling after her.

"Hush!" she yelled out, stepping away from him to go find Buffy.

OoOoO

Angel parked his car in front of Buffy's building. Today had been long. She looked lost in thought and sad most of the way back here. "What's on mind over there, Beautiful?"

Buffy let out a shaky breath. "Being around you makes everything seem so out of control. It's like this huge part of me was woken up and went into autopilot, even with the shock and awe of seeing you again it just felt natural to go back and forth with you again like that. Those excited, flirty feelings rushed back like they had never even left and came with full force. It's like... those years apart happened but at the same time so much feels like we could almost pick up where we left off in a sense. Which.. I mean, that is fun and all... but... it's also holy terrifying. Angel, we ended pretty easily, easier than we should have anyway. And like I said earlier no matter how much I tried to just make it go smoothly and cut things off before they got worse... it was horrible to go through all of that."

Angel let his head fall back against the head rest. "We tried and we failed once so..."

Buffy sniffled beside him. "I don't want to go through that again. There's been so much on the idea of what if we, I don't know, tried this again and that part is almost easy to think about. Being around you, kissing you, sleeping with you, spending time with you... that all comes natural, but when I take that extra moment to think it over I see the end. And I don't want to do that part again. So I don't know what we're doing with one another here."

Angel unclipped his seat belt and cracked his knuckles a few times. "I wish I could go back and do everything differently," he told her.

"Me too," she told him softly.

Angel swallowed. "I shouldn't have left or I should have figured something out to make everything work. When I realized how bad me being away and how hard everything was on you back in Sunnydale I should have gotten my ass in gear and fixed everything right then and there. I wasn't trying to put you on the backburner or act like we weren't important through any of it, I promise. I just... I didn't realize how bad it was at first. I kept thinking if we just get through the weeks away, then when I come home we can work on everything and we would try but then I'd be gone again and more would come up and before I knew it we were drowning and struggling to catch up."

"Angel, there was no right or wrong with us. This wasn't one issue, one choice... it wasn't... it wasn't a one-sided thing ever."

"Buffy, I wasn't there when you needed me most. I had one job and that was to be your husband and I failed. I wasn't there and I let everything snowball out of control and by the time I woke up and realized how fucking bad things were it was already too late."

She shook her head. "I spent so much time trying to figure out what exactly went wrong with us and so much time trying to think back to every choice I ever made and how I could have done something different to have changed things. I could have asked you to stay, Angel. I could have figured out some way to be out there, I know we tried several times to figure that out but we could have kept pressing on and on until we figured it out. I could have not gotten jealous and crazy. I could have... I could have understood that many people have husbands or wives who have jobs that keep them away for long periods of times. I could have tried to explain to you long before how crappy everything was turning instead of shutting you out. I could have begged you to fight with me instead of basically just throwing in the towel and giving up. That list just goes on and on, Angel."

Angel let his head fall down to his steering wheel. "I didn't have on and off switch with you. I was in love with you, even when you were telling me all the reasons why we should end. Even when I let guilt just consume me for making you ever feel like that. I was in love with you as I signed those papers. I was in love with you afterward. Even after we were divorced I still wanted to stop drowning in that guilt, step up and fix everything. I would fly out to LA... I would get a rental car but I never used it. I'd come out on our anniversary, on the anniversary of our divorce, anytime I just suddenly had the urge and was able to. I'd fly out, and I would stay in the airport because I was scared to death to actually go to Sunnydale."

"What?" Buffy half whispered.

"I didn't want us over, but I also didn't know how in the hell to come back from where we were. I tried over and over to put it all behind me and just accept things as they were but then I'd panic and be packing a bag. I didn't know what to show up to Sunnydale with. You took the divorce with such ease and I was trying to just hide my own emotions and not make waves, I didn't know if you'd moved on, I didn't know what the hell I could say or do to bring us back to where we needed to be. For three years I'd wind up doing that. Then..." he shook his head at the memory, "I finally started seeing someone and I thought things were going pretty alright. But our anniversary started to approach and I was still far from okay with the fact we were out of one another's lives. It came on so quick one day, it physically hurt. I was out there, without you, then with someone else and none of it felt right and all I wanted to do was apologize and beg you to take me back. Again, I got on a plane but that last time... that last time I forced myself back home."

The wheels in Buffy's head seemed to be turning. "I wasn't there," she whispered. "Oh, God."

Fumbling with her own seat belt then got out of the car. Angel shut it off and came around to the other side.

"Dawn was graduating, she was going off to collage, I decided to sell the house and started trying to figure out what I was going to do as my next step," she told him in a rush. "I wasn't there."

Angel leaned up against his vehicle. "There was a different name on the mailbox, new family living inside who I briefly met when I went to the door anyhow," he told her. "They'd told me you'd moved. And it nearly knocked the fucking life out of me."

"Angel..."

"But Buf, even then... I could have gone right next to and asked Jenny to help me find you. I could have gone to Willow or Xander or anyone else. And I thought long and hard about that too but it was like a crappy sign to be a means to an end in my mind at the time. It was a slam in the face that I had waited too long again. And I was so glad you got out of that small town and hoped you were finding everything you wanted out there... and I didn't want to mess that up." Buffy's hand came up to cup over her mouth and her eyes closed. "I quit when I got back home. I found a new company, I moved, and I just tried to keep things as one day at a time until I was able to even attempt to move on with my life. It hurts to even think back to any of that, my stomach wants to drop out anytime I think of those days when we fell apart. I don't want to go through that again either, Buffy."

Buffy sniffled again. She started walking around a few steps aimlessly, her hands shaking out as she walked. "So... what, we got caught up in old feelings? We had one last night together for old time's sake?" she asked, her voice cutting out.

Angel ran a hand down his face and looked at the ground. It was starting to get dark out. "You flipped my world upside down the second I saw you again. I couldn't stop thinking about you after that. I went to Jesse's birthday bash thing more to see you than to celebrate with him. I wanted you last night. I wanted you today. All I wanted was to be close to you today. And I'm standing out here knowing it's darker and chillier and eventually you're going to go on inside and I'm dreading that with all I got. And yes a lot of that has to do with past feelings I'm sure but not everything going on inside of me is directly only at the past. I wanted you because you're still as perfect as you always were, because I was attracted to you. I don't want to go home... and that's more to do with right now than anything from all those years ago. I-I to be honest Buffy I want to be with you. I truly do. I tried to fight that and I'm sure you have to because that's crazy talk! I understand that but that's where I'm at. I want to do this... the dates, having you around, taking you home, waking up with you. I want that... because I had it before and I missed it, because I wish I'd have fixed this and not lost years between us, because when I look at you that's all I see even now. I'm terrified that we did this before and it ended the way that it did but that doesn't stop me from wanting to see all of this as a miracle of a second chance."

"Second chance?"

Angel looked at the pretty blonde. "Maybe. If we let it be?" She looked like she was going to cry again. "Or if you're not okay with that then I'm not going to push it, I promise. I don't have any leg to stand on on that anymore. I just know how I feel. I just know that I like being around you. I know that I want to see you again. I know that I'm dreading going home and being away from you and terrified to actually give you silent time to yourself to think up every reason why this is the dumbest thing that's even been brought up. I'm terrified that I'm going to get back in that car, drive away, and somehow it'll play out to where we never see each other again."

Buffy walked around again for a few moments. "This could devastate both of us."

"I know," he said softly back to her.

"You'd really be willing to risk that?"

Angel was silent for a few minutes. "I have been happier in the past day and a half than I've been in the past several years. I thought I could just chuck up that first date the other week to being a fluke and just put it behind me but even that wasn't happening. I can't promise you that I know how things will wind up no matter how much I wish that I could. But I can promise you that I want to try to see what this could be if we gave in to it."

Buffy looked up toward where her apartment was. She shivered a little as a cold breeze came through around them. "This is crazy, Angel."

"I know," he told her.

OoOoO

Buffy hated that she was an emotional wreck right now, there was so much going on inside of her. She wanted to cry again, to laugh, to scream, to kiss him, and a billion other things all at once. She knew he was anxious as he stood over against his car still but her mind was racing with a thousand thoughts, being tugged in several different directions.

Finally, she walked back over to him. His eyes slowly met hers and she felt herself shake again for completely different reasons that time. "I'm sorry to lay all this out like this right now," he finally spoke again. "Maybe we need to slow down and really just think things over. I don't know."

Buffy thought that sounded awful. She didn't want to be left alone with her thoughts. She didn't want to slow down, if they were going to go for this she wanted to be all in and do things right. Buffy gave Angel a quick kiss before going over to the passenger side door. She opened it up and got back inside.

"What are you doing?"

"You said you didn't want to go home alone... so... what if I came with you this time?"

OoOoO

Angel did his best to lighten the mood as they drove away from her apartment. Even so, Buffy felt that bit of sadness lingering as they talked more about different parts of their lives over the past seven years but she did her best to push that down. She listened as he talked about work, different places he'd lived, friends he'd made along the way. He asked her about things back home, their old friends and such that he'd also been out of contact with over the past many years.

Buffy couldn't help but smile as they went past where Cordelia and Jesse lived as she thought of how damn giddy Cordelia had been earlier after finding out she and Angel had spent the previous night together. She knew she'd never live this whole Angel situation down with that woman.

It wasn't long before Angel was pulling up into a small community of new townhomes and parking them inside the right garage. Angel opened a door and turned on a light quickly as he made his way around to her side, opening the door for her and helping her out. Entering, Buffy passed through a small mud room into the kitchen, following Angel out into a large dining room. He turned on a few lights and took her jacket and bag for her. "This place is huge," she commented as he got back.

"Yeah, I think it's too much space for just me," he said. "There's an upstairs I don't even really have any use for." Buffy glanced over to her right and saw the staircase, she let her eyes try to follow it up. "You hungry?"

Buffy looked back toward him as he was taking his own coat off. "Yeah, a little bit."

"A little bit or a lot bit?" he asked. "Because I can either cook us something or I can order out."

Buffy smiled. "Oh, no, I wanna see you make me something," she told him. He smirked and went through a few options. Once she chose Buffy said she was going to make a few phone calls while he got started.

"If you go around the corner there to the right there's an office, it doesn't have a door though. If you want more privacy you can go all the way to the left to my bedroom or upstairs," he told her. "Tell Will hi for me again," he added.

Buffy rolled her eyes at him. Reaching into her bag she pulled out a small notepad and pen, quickly writing Willow's phone number down and walked back into the kitchen to give him the piece of paper. "Tell her hi your own self," she told him. Softening her tone, Buffy added, "She's love to hear from you." And with that Buffy walked off to go call her best friend who's been trying to get back with her all day. Buffy made her way to the office area Angel mentioned, she let her eyes wander around the room before taking a seat at the desk, knowing she had a lot to go over with her best friend.

OoOoO

After talking with Willow and briefly with the all too excited Cordelia, Buffy made her way back to the kitchen. "That smells amazing," Buffy commented, getting his attention.

Angel looked over his shoulder and smiled. "It'll be done here in a few. You can make yourself at home if you want."

First Buffy asked if she could help with anything and set the table for the two of them, then she started looking around his place more. Buffy wondered how much time he actually spent here, everything was so in order and looked brand new. The most lived in and decorated area had been his office that she'd noticed so far. Buffy remained downstairs, looking around his large living room and peeking at the master bedroom. Buffy felt her heart jump a little looking at the large bed.

"Does your fireplace work?"

"Yeah, it should," he called from the kitchen. "It's just an electric one. I've tried it once but you can turn it on if you want."

Buffy sat down on the large sectional to watch it for a few moments before Angel appeared around the corner and said everything was done. She asked where she could wash up real quick and went to his bedroom. Buffy took a little tour of the room before making her way to the connected bathroom. She fixed her hair and washed her hands, peeked into the closet on the other side then went back out to have dinner with Angel.

"I officially like your place so much better than mine," Buffy announced as she came back out. Angel was setting the food out on the large table that took up most of the space in his dining area.

"Yeah? Why's that?"

"This is gorgeous," she told him. "And huge. I wish I had this much space. Not that I have a lot of stuff as it is but oh, the possibilities! I'm grateful I was able to get my apartment when I did but it just doesn't feel like home for some reason," she said, sitting down. "That's part of why I haven't even fully unpacked yet probably. Those boxes everywhere make me anxious but I just haven't gotten around to putting everything away."

Angel stopped what he was doing for a moment and just looked at her. "You should move in," he said all of a sudden.

Buffy looked at him like he had two heads. "What?!"

"You should move in with me."

Buffy's mouth just hung open as she stared back at him for a minute. "That is crazy."

Angel shrugged. "Why? You like it, there's plenty of room, it's closer to your work by a long shot..."

"There's... you!"

"I thought I was a selling point," he said with a smirk.

"I can't live with you!"

"You have before."

"Exactly! I don't even know what we are right now or what the hell we are doing so I don't see moving in as the smartest thing. You're this side of crazy."

Angel finished with the table then sat down at the table as well. "Maybe," he said. "All of this has been crazy though, Buf. And if you were serious about us seeing where this goes between us again and giving this another chance then I'm right here and I am one hundred percent for that."

"I was, I am... but there's a big difference between us dating again or whatever and moving in together."

"I'm not saying you have to, I'm just throwing it out there. It's an offer, an idea, whatever. Maybe that is fast but I don't care. We've lived together before and a lot of time was wasted since the last time we were under the same roof. I wouldn't mind playing catch up on that, or not... that's fine. I'm just looking at you... thinking I like the view. That I wouldn't mind coming home from work tomorrow night and you being here, and the next night and so on..."

Buffy didn't even know what to say.

OoOoO

"Sorry."

Buffy had just started the dishwasher. She turned around to find Angel coming toward her, he wrapped his large arms around her.

"For what?"

"Freaking you out," he told her. He lifted her up and placed her on the counter behind her. He stood between her legs and Buffy leaned down to rest her head of his shoulder. "That was not my intent and I don't even know why that came over me. It just suddenly hit me and I spoke without actually thinking."

Buffy swallowed. "Are you taking it back?"

"No, just apologizing for any of it in the first place I guess."

Buffy shook her head against him. "Don't. You surprised me, that's all."

"I've missed you a lot more than I even realized. I keep getting ahead of myself."

Buffy rubbed her arms down his back. "You're not alone in that, Angel."

Angel pulled back a little so he could look at her. He gave her a gentle kiss. "I am glad you are here, I do like you being here with me. Even if it's just for tonight."

Buffy pulled Angel back to her and kissed him again before hopping back down the floor. "You should give me a tour," she said playfully. "Starting upstairs because I haven't been up there yet."

Angel laughed. "Alright," he told her and started leading to the stairs.

The top floor was mostly empty Buffy found. There was a large open space you first walked up into, Angel had an extra television set up as well as a sofa and loveseat set and a couple of end tables that also seemed to match. There was a mini fridge and microwave on a small stand in the corner. On the far side of the room there was a door that led to a storage area Angel had mostly filled up with boxes and such. "What's all that?" she asked, raking her eyes over everything.

"Stuff from school, yearbooks and such... photo albums... There's some of my mom's stuff buried in the back corners like an antique jewelry holder thing."

There was a large bathroom with next to nothing inside on the top floor. Angel had added a shower curtain to the bath tub and a bath mat but not much else. There was a linen closet that held a few extra towels and throw blankets and then two bare bedrooms. Angel said nothing as she went inside each room, looking out the windows that only had blinds covering them, checking out the closest space in the rooms. She wondered why he didn't rent the space or the rooms out but didn't ask out loud.

Together they made their way back down. Angel showed her another small storage space she'd missed earlier at the bottom of the staircase then she looked again at the foyer, his office. The entry way had a welcoming mat, hat rack, a key holder and a display on the wall to place coats. There were a few paintings hanging up as well. He had an empty fish tank. "This is the most lived in room," Buffy commented as they entered his office.

"Yeah," he agreed, looking around. There were two desk top computers and at least two more laptops that Buffy could spot. He had a very nice desk and two extra leather arm chairs in the room. There were notebooks, folders, filing cabinets... he had several awards on the walls.

Angel showed her back through the living room, kitchen, pantry, the mud room which was pretty filled up on its shelves up to the ceiling. She peeked her head back out to the garage and he turned the light on. Half of it was neat and tidy, the other half could use some work she noted. Angel followed her back out, going to the living room. The two didn't make it much further than that,

Buffy already starting to slip out of her dress, leaving a trail of her clothes as she made her way into the bedroom.

Angel about tackled her down to the bed, his mouth quickly finding hers. "And this would be your bedroom."

"Mmhmm. And the tour stops right about here for now."

"Mmm, I think I can deal with that," she told him.

"Good," he told her before he started kissing a path down the shape of her body.

OoOoO

"Angel?" Buffy said a little louder, for the third time. He groaned so she shook him a little.

"What's the matter?" he asked sleepily.

"Someone was knocking on your door I think."

"They'll go away," he mumbled only for a moment later to be jolted up by a loud knocking on the window.

"Get up and get decent losers!" Jesse's voice came out. "We're going to breakfast!"

"What in the fuck," Angel half muttered making Buffy laugh louder.

She pulled the blankets up more around herself. "I don't have any clothes in here... and all I even have is my dress from yesterday," she whispered.

Angel heard knocking on the door this time and muttered a new string of curses as he got up and threw on a shirt and boxers.

OoOoO

"Really?" Angel said as he opened the door. Jesse was back over at the other side and the two men were both doing their best not to smile.

"It was all her idea," Jesse quickly said. "And now I'm hungry... so... sorry."

"Morning, Angel," Cordelia said, pushing past him. "You're taking us all out."

"I am?" he questioned. "I don't remember agreeing to any of this."

"It's your way of saying thank you," Cordelia drawled out.

"Uh huh. Well, Buffy has a... limited clothing options..."

"Oh, please. I have that handled," Cordy said with a roll of her eyes, holding up the bag in her hands. She started walking toward where his bedroom was. He'd shut the door and threw her clothes in before going out to answer.

"Cord, you might want to knock. There's a chance she may not be wearing.. uh... well, anything."

Again Cordelia rolled her eyes. "We'll be fine. I have seen Buffy naked before. Hell, everyone in this house has," she said and both she and Angel gave looks at the other male.

Jesse was fast to hold his hands up in front of him. "Hey now! Don't you be trying to get me in trouble, woman!" he started. "That was not even my fault or under my intentions. It was awkward and uncomfortable for everyone! Much like this moment right here."

Angel continued to look Jesse's way after Cordelia disappeared. "Do I need to know something?" he joked.

"It was not like that!"