Chapter 12:

Resting her head back against the chair, Lightning just had to resist the urge to laugh as she could see Rosa starting to get towards her wit's end. It was beyond amusing to her just because she knew that it wasn't even out of malice for Lightning. Which was more than enough to shock Rosa a little just from the comparison of Serah to Lightning's father.

"I'm just saying that you can always find some place to store the money. Because you won't like what it looks like as one figure instead of twelve smaller ones."

"Serah we realistically only need one of those every few years." Rosa said as she started to rub her temples.

"Serah, would I be far out of line if I said to Rosa that this is because you are feeling more like Father and not helping me when I'm suffering in your eyes?" Lightning said as she could see Rosa developing a shocked look as she could hear Serah coughing on the other end. "I'm right aren't I? Serah, I'm sure if Rosa thought about it long and hard she could figure out a way you could help that makes it feel to you like you are actively helping and it stops this headache for her."

"Shut up Claire. I'm nothing like him." Serah spat as Lightning just smirked causing Rosa's full attention to be drawn to them.

"This over compensation is making me think you do think you are like him. But you aren't Serah. We both know that. You just need to relax and listen to Rosa." Lightning stated as she just stared at the head doctor who she just knew had the same expression of shock strewn across her face that Serah was going to have.

"If you weren't my big sister I'd happily start a war to get your head for a comment like that..." Serah spoke softly. It was so quiet that Rosa had to strain her hearing to hear but it still shot through the room like a grenade had gone off.

"Please Serah, you are squeamish around me having a scraped up knuckle. How do you think you'll fair seeing a war you want for a body part of mine?"

"CLAIRE!" Serah screamed as both Lightning and Rosa could hear a loud bark followed by the woman on the other end taking a deep and calming breath. "Rosa. Can you and I talk without my sister being present? She is just going to get on my nerves intentionally which might lead to me doing something stupid, so please can you and I just talk in private?"

"Yes that can be arranged. It is about time for Lightning to have her blood sugar tested anyways." Rosa said as she picked up the phone and pressed the speakerphone button. Just as the teenager was standing up herself to walk out of the room.

"If she starts to bring up that she can't do what you want, go that way or how our father when he wanted to shut her up would give her money. That should stop her in her tracks and get her to look at things objectively."

"Lightning. I know what I'm doing. Good night." Rosa said with her hand over the microphone as she could see Lightning walking out of the room. It provided a weird sense of comfort to Rosa just because it was that reminder that she always felt like she needed when she was dealing with those videos. "Okay, she is gone now Serah, can you please just see this from my point of view?"

"I need to know that I'm doing something to help my big sister. With money I know I'm at the very least I'm losing a tiny part of my family's obscene wealth. Just being there for Claire doesn't work. Not for me because she refuses to talk to me about anything that is important in her life. Especially when it is something like this. I doubt even torture could get her to talk." Serah spoke as Rosa quickly shot her hand up to cover her mouth.

Taking a deep breath Rosa just glanced at the ceiling. "If you need to feel like you are doing something to help her Serah, there isn't much you can do besides being there for her to let her open up in her own time. But I can assure you throwing money at me or the institute isn't going to do much for anyone at this point due to the fact that we don't have anywhere to put it. But if you want to help I'm sure there is a lot someone in your position could do."

"Like what?" Serah asked sceptical. The time she had spent in her current position becoming clear to Rosa if just because this had at one point been a girl that would have jumped long before looking and damning the consequences that would befall her because she knew that she would be fine on the other end due to others coming to save her and hide the underbelly of the world from her.

"Do you remember Palom and Porom? I received news that they are looking for an education beyond the teachings of the church and the town, Mysidia can't foot the bill for that nor do they even really know where to start. Something that they have informed me and despite the fact I know both Palom and Porom do write to your sister almost weekly they haven't mentioned that to her."

"I don't see how that would help my big sister..."

"It would make her happy to hear that Palom and Porom are achieving what they want. Mainly getting their lives back on track. And like with a physical wound, people do tend to heal better when they are happy. And unlike with Vanille, unless Palom and Porom intend to scuttle any advantage they are given which is unlike them."

"Yeah I suppose I could find them a dorm willing to educate them in whatever they want. or hell I could even find them a room or two here..." Serah began as Rosa was almost deafened by the sound of a knock followed by a groan. "That is my ten o clock appointment. So we need to put a pin in this Rosa."

"Okay, you have my number and I now apparently have this private line..." Rosa said carefully as she stood up walking around the desk.

"Just don't write it down. All lines into the current Farron houses tend to be super restricted and they can only achieve that by keeping all traces of it gone."

"Okay Serah. I won't."

Smiling faintly as she rested her head on Lightning's lap as she started to shuffle the cards in her hand. "So how did the games go Lann, Reynn?" Lightning asked as Vanille blew a raspberry up. "Vanille, don't be a sore loser." Lightning continued as she smiled down at her.

"I lost by one. A stupid point... and you said that you knew a fun game but just started reading... not even reading out loud." Vanille complained as Lightning just sighed as she closed her book over and accepted the deck of cards.

"While I'm waiting for another book, all I have is philosophy books, or ones ear marked for you to read. And philosophy isn't a topic that you'd enjoy. It is all about questioning the motives of people... and this one specifically points out what makes a bad person a bad person."

"Moment they want to harm another person. Next question." Vanille said as she started to sit up as she watched the cards dance between Lightning's hands in a blind flurry

"What if they were going to harm someone you cared about? Like Fang and they wouldn't stop until you stopped them with force." Lightning said as she started to deal out several cards towards the various people when she could see out of the corner of her eye the sight of Vanille just biting her lip. "That is what this author poses. Not in as black and white terms. But states that context of why a person acts is just as important as the act itself. Any act a person takes can be thought of in those black and white terms you state, but that would make you just as bad as the person in my example that was going to harm Fang. He simply poses where is the line? What act makes a person too far gone?"

"Nietzsche... that is what it sounds like." Reynn said as Lightning smiled and tapped her nose.

"Who dat? And what does the book say?" Vanille said as she started to pick the cards in front of her up.

"He is someone who specialised in philosophy and tended to write pretty dark topics. But the point of the book is that humans are dumb for even creating morality that is impossible for us to achieve close to the standard we set ourselves. The acts we perform never matter, but the intent of the act matters. Did you wake up in the morning wanting to harm one person and they just happened to want to harm Fang? Then that makes you bad. If you happen upon it then you might be good. Regardless, we all are human so there is no point in looking at the end result like most people before him did and you can't look at their reasons after the fact and focus solely on them. You have to look at both."

"Fun. You should pick better books. Maybe that is why you were so grumpy last week." Vanille started as she cocked her head to the side to look at the book. "Pretty cover though. Now what game is this? Don't tell me it has the name of some fun activity that is going to make me feel embarrassed that I get confused over." Vanille asked as she started to fan the cards outwards so she was looking at them with a smile.

"That wasn't why I was grumpy. I was grumpy because I was in pain. And it has many names. But the one Serah taught it to me is called 'Bullshit' . We take turns laying cards face down saying what they are and it can either be the truth or you lying about what it is. If you think someone is lying they reveal the cards they placed, if you call it right they pick up the stack. If you call it wrong you do. The point of the game is to be the first to empty your hands."

"Why wouldn't you just tell one of the doctors? They seem like they would give you something if you hurt yourself." Lann said as he started to snicker ignoring an elbow coming from his sister. "And how do we decide who goes first?"

Placing three cards face down, Lightning just sighed. "Three twos. And it wasn't that I hurt myself. I can ignore that kind of pain. Not my first bout of cramps since I was eleven though. And for the record I did talk to Yuna about it. She suggested a type of tea and that helped."

"Raspberry leaf or chamomile? She always suggests both. And if you would have told me I would have helped ease the pain. Some of the elders in Oerba taught all of the girls how to elevate the pain and they always said the best way that didn't involve expensive drugs or teas was to have someone rub your lower back... or exercise frequently which is probably why it didn't cross my mind that is what was wrong with you." Vanille started as she took some cards from her hand. "Four aces." Vanille said as she placed them face down and on top of the ones lightning had pointed to.

"Why would they teach girls that?" Reynn asked as Vanille just laughed and pulled a single card from her hand. "One three."

"I'm from a small village. What we couldn't grow or make then chances are we didn't have ready access to it. I mean to the nearest town Paddra it was still a day and a half journey and parts of that you were looking over a cliff. And to the bridge it was a multiple day trek and that was only once you knew the way."

"That sounds a little sad. What if someone got sick or needed emergency surgeries?"

"We did have some stores for medicines, just those were reserved for when a person looked really bad and there was a doctor present. We just happened to be lucky unlike Paddra and had a lot of powerful medicinal herbs around. If neither worked or if someone needed serious surgery we would try and keep them alive until our fastest runners could get a message out but most of the time all we could do was ease their pain as we waited for their death." Vanille said softly as she started to gaze off.

Getting brought out of the slight trance by the placing of a soft and gentle if a little awkward hand on her shoulder, Vanille quickly shook her head. "Sorry Light. I wasn't drifting that way." Vanille started as she took a deep breath. "It isn't to say that we didn't get check ups. For a week every season some doctors would come to our village and Paddra which is how we know so much about the plants that grow around our villages just they couldn't stay all the time and you can't prevent bad things from happening."

"What about your parents? I'm sure they wouldn't have any way to relax if you got sick..." Reynn spoke softly as Vanille just looked at the cards in her hand.

"I'm an orphan. Nobody knows my dad and my mom was an example of bad things happening. She died giving birth to me after a beast attacked her..." Vanille spoke softly as she lowered the cards down. "Light... I'm not in the mood to play anymore." Vanille said in a soft tone as she moved the cards towards the center.

Not even giving Lightning a chance to ask her what was the matter Vanille stood up and nearly sprinted out of the room. Sighing internally, Lightning looked towards the shocked expression. "Everyone is in here for a reason... and shockingly that isn't hers. I need to go see if she is alright."

"Okay..." Lann said as Lightning stood up and placed her stack of cards on top of Vanille's. "Shut up Tama..."

"We should probably go to get more of our medication anyways..." Reynn said as Lightning just smiled at her.

'For once, you didn't make her storm off crying... but I don't think they contributed to it either... at least you aren't the only one who hears a super smart and sexy voice in your head.'

Shaking her head, Lightning started to walk out of the room and towards the only room she knew Vanille found comfort in. Or at least she knew that there were two rooms that she knew where Vanille found comfort in. Even down to the point that she knew that there was no chance that Vanille was in her room.

Opening her door she just felt her lips press into a thin line as she could see Vanille sitting in the corner of her bed, tears building up in her eyes as she clutched Lightning's pillow to her chest. Walking over, Lightning took a seat on the edge of the bed as she gently pulled Vanille into a hug.

Just the feeling of initiating a hug was strange and a little revolting to her. At least she could see it being that if it was anyone but Vanille who needed her to hug them.

"I'm sorry... I just..."

"It's okay Vanille. How many times have you caught me in a similar situation where I don't know how to explain it to you? Just... enjoy my first self initiated hug and take from it all the comfort you can."

Smiling faintly as she felt Lightning pull the cuff of her sleeve up as to just dry her eyes a bit. Despite how awkward it felt, she was still happy that Lightning was still trying her hardest to give her what she needs. It was actually a little funny. Just because she knew how hard this was for Lightning to do but she was still trying her hardest.

"Have I mentioned that I hate seeing you cry?" Lightning whispered softly as Vanille just laughed softly as she snuggled further into Lightning's embrace. "I'm serious. I tend to not care overly if people cry. Especially when it is over something stupid in my eyes... like people looking at my past. But you... I really hate seeing you cry. And if it makes you feel better so does the voice."

'Correction, I hate it when you make her cry. This time she set herself off it seems.'

"It does make me feel a little better... and while you aren't the best at giving comfort... the thought is what counts. I just don't know what set me off... I've thought about my parents a lot but... just something tipped me over." Vanille said softly as she just took a deep breath.

"If we ever did come out to my mother, chances are she'd accept you as one of her own... but I don't have many warm memories of her... and if your father is alive, I could use my family's influence to find him. It would probably be the one good duty my family has genuinely done in I'd say a hundred years."

"I don't want to know him. He abandoned me if he was alive. Fang is my father, mother, big sister and best friend. I mean when she found out about me and you she was just as mad at me as you were when you both found out that I put you ahead of my recovery... although she did that stupid forehead flick to me. Which hurts a little, but you made me actually feel bad." Vanille whispered softly as Lightning just took a deep breath and pulled her closer.

"I don't want you to ever put me ahead of yourself Vanille. You know that. Standing offer though. If you ever want to find him, give me a few months and if he is alive I or even Serah could find him. But you know that despite the fact that I'm not very good at expressing my emotions... you know I won't abandon you. Hell it would take one of us dying to keep us separated... but I just know if it was you, I wouldn't be very far behind."

"Suicide isn't funny Light." Vanille scolded.

"I'm sorry."

'You weren't joking and that is frankly the scary part to me. And I'm sure it would be scary to everyone that knows you.'

"Thanks for being here anyways Light."

"I'm happy to be here for you Vanille."

Author's Note:

And another chapter is done.