A Moment of Madness
I hate the fact that I have just told Stefan that I hate him because I don't. I love him. I just hate the way he acts like I am kid and have no say in anything.
I have been wondering around the woods for hours, because I am dreading going back home, so I'm stalling for as long as possible. I know when I get back I'm going to get an ear bashing off Stefan and maybe even smacked for cussing at him. Sometimes I really hate my life! I can't put it off any longer so I begrudgingly, and also worriedly, make my way back.
My phone rings for the umpteenth time. It's Stefan. I decide that it would be better to answer it so I'll know what type of mood he is in before I go home.
"Hello"
"Sophia... I've been trying to call you."
"I know. Sorry. I just needed time to clear my head." I tell him.
"Where are you?"
"I'm just heading home now. I'll be there in a couple of minutes."
"Ok. Stay there until I get back. We need to have a talk." Uh oh. That doesn't sound good, does it?
"I will do. Bye." I hang up the phone.
I am almost home when I see Caroline running down the drive. "What the...?" I say out loud. I watch her until she is out of my field of vision. I cautiously walk through the front door, still a bit miffed as to why Caroline was doing her best Usain Bolt impression.
"Helloooo. Is anyone home? Zach?" There is no answer so I slowly make my way through the downstairs areas. "Zach? Are you here?" Still no answer.
I make my way down to the basement to check on Damon. As I turn the corner to the cell I see Zach laying on the floor, his body is slumped and his neck is at a weird angle.
"ZACH" I shout as I run over to him. I bite my wrist and try to feed him my blood, but it's no use. "Please don't be dead! Please Zach! Wake up." I'm too late.
It's only after I come to my senses and notice that the cell door is open that I realise what has happened. Damon killed Zach! Nooo, no no no this can't be happening. Please don't let it be true. He promised me he wouldn't kill anymore, he can't have killed Zach!
I hear movement upstairs and vamp up as quick as I can. Damon is in his room getting changed.
"Damon, please tell me it wasn't you who killed Zach?" I beg him. He furrows his eyebrows and for a split second, I can see remorse on his face before gives me a stoic look.
"Of course it was me. Who else would it have been?" My tears are flowing to the point where I can hardly see.
"But you promised!" There is a lump in my throat that distorts my voice, making it sound squeaky and small.
Again, I think I can see a tiny flicker of remorse.
"That's when I thought I would get out. I heard what Stefan said, so I got myself out!" He smirked at me. I wanted to vomit. How can he be so callous? Zach is our family. Our only remaining family at that. I pull out my phone to call Stefan and let him know what has happened, but Damon takes it off me.
"I don't think so, little sister. You are not giving him a heads up." I freeze. What is he going to do to Stefan?
I didn't have to wait long as Stefan came home a couple of minutes later and Damon vamped down to him.
"Sophia, where ar..." The rest of his sentence is garbled and I see why when I reach them. Damon has him pinned against the wall by his throat. Fear is etched on to his face.
"D-Damon... How di-how did you get out?" Stefan managed to get out in between gasps of breath. His hands were around Damon's wrists, trying to prise them away from his throat.
"Stefan, he killed Zach!" I told him, fresh tears streaming down my face.
"No! No!" He shakes his head.
"Yes, yes, brother. Luckily for you - you won't die" Damon reached up and snapped Stefan's neck. "Well, not permanently anyway!" He joked.
Stefan's body fell to the floor and Damon just stepped over him like he is nothing but trash.
"Why did you do that?" I ask but he just ignores me.
I know Stefan isn't dead but seeing him laying there so lifeless is terrifying. I pick him up and carry him over to the sofa and place him laying down on his back. He just looks like he is sleeping now.
Damon has the audacity to just stand there, pouring himself a bourbon, like what he has just done is completely acceptable. Well it's not! Going over to him, I smack the glass that is half full of bourbon, out of his hand and it smashes on the floor.
"Watch it, little girl!" He warns me, his hand shaped like he is still holding the glass.
"No, you watch it!" I throw it right back at him.
"Don't test my patience, Sophia."
"Why? What are you going to do? Snap my neck?"
"Oooooh I could do so much worse to you, little one" I can feel the fear rising inside of me but I push it away.
"I'm not afraid of you, Damon!" He vamps in front of me,
"Well you should be!"
"I think you should just leave, Damon, before Stefan wakes up."
"I think no!"
"I'm serious!"
"so am I!"
"you're not wanted here anymore, so just go."
"This is my home too, Sophia. I'm not going anywhere. I happen to like it in Mystic Falls!"
I give up. It doesn't matter what I say, he won't listen, so I return to Stefan, hoping he wakes up soon.
It has been roughly 20 minutes since I laid Stefan on the sofa. He wakes up gasping for breath and clutching his neck. He looks around frantically until his gaze focuses on me.
"Are you ok? I ask him.
"Where is he?" He finally managed to say, completely avoiding my question.
"He's upstairs." He swung his legs around, so they where flat on the floor, and sat up, still rubbing at his neck.
I give him a minute to compose himself and offer him a drink. He declines.
"Stefan, what are we going to do about Damon? I've asked him to leave but he's adamant that he is staying here. He is not going to leave anytime soon"
"I really don't know, Soph. I just... Don't know". He slams his fist on the coffee table and it breaks. I have never seen him like this, he is normally calm and collected. Well, unless he is in ripper mode, but that's a different story and a different Stefan altogether.
"Calm down Stef, we just have to wait him out".
"What?" He looks at me like I've lost my mind.
"I said we just have to wait him out. He won't stay long - he never does! He will get bored soon because you know he doesn't like small town life."
"I think that might be easier said than done."
"We have to try at least. Just ignore him, pretend that he's not here. Hopefully he will get bored sooner rather than later!"
That's exactly what we did. It's been two weeks since that fateful day and I haven't said a single word to Damon. Stefan has spoken to him, but only to be civil. I can't even do that. I literally just grunt or murmur if he speaks to me.
I haven't been out much of late, just to school and back. Socialising is not one of my priorities anymore. Stefan spends as much time as he can with Elena. He doesn't like leaving me home alone or with him but I don't like him staying here because of me, so I tell him to go. There is no point in both of us suffering, is there? Damon just floats around doing whatever Damon does. I don't care anymore. The only good thing I can say about him is that there have been no deaths since Zach. None that have been reported at least.
I can't get the image of Zach out of my head. I know this sounds crazy coming from a vampire, but death terrifies me. Not my own death, but other people's. Don't get me wrong, I have seen a lot of it, especially with ripper Stefan, but I don't like it. Seeing Zach though, he was not just some random that I didn't know, but my own family. It has really affected me, messed with my head.
I guess it's because I know I'm partially responsible for his death. If I hadn't have gave Damon that blood bag, he would never have been strong enough to do what he did. So I suppose that actually makes me directly responsible, doesn't it?
Stefan just called me to let me know that he is staying over at Elena's and there is no sign of Damon. There is a good chance that he won't be home tonight either, so I'll have the whole of the boarding house all to myself. I consider inviting Sarah and Emma over but decide not to. I have been avoiding them for the past two weeks and they would be full of questions, wondering why, and I'm just not up for it right now.
I'm feeling a little bit rebellious so I grab a bottle of Damon's best bourbon, a glass and take them to my room. If I'm honest, it tastes like crap but I keep drinking it anyway. The fact that it will piss Damon off makes it taste that bit sweeter.
I have never drank strong alcohol before, only beer, so by the time I've drank a quarter of the bottle I'm far from level headed. I don't know what has come over me, but the thought of messing up Damon's things seems really appeasing to me right now.
I enter his room and take a good look around. It's time to get this plan in to action. I walk over to his bed and pull all of his covers and sheets off and throw them around his room. Then it was his mattress. I smash his bed until it is nothing more than antique fire wood. Next I emptied all of his drawers, most of his clothes I threw into the bathtub filled with cold water. Now when he does come back, he will have nowhere to sleep and no dry clothes to wear. "Ha" I say out loud.
I look around his room and I should feel satisfaction but I don't. I feel... Stupid! Alls that will come from this will be one VERY pissed off Damon! Stefan won't be best pleased with me either. There is nothing I can do about it now, though, so I head back to my own room and pour myself another bourbon. It doesn't taste so bad now, I think it's killed off my taste buds.
I must have passed out because I don't remember going to sleep. I wake up to Damon wailing like a banshee. I can't make sense of anything, my head is spinning too much. I must still be drunk.
Seconds later, Damon comes storming in to my room.
"WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE?" He shouts at me. The alcohol must have gave me courage because I just sit here and laugh. Pretty soon I'm laughing uncontrollably, and that's when Damon notices his previously full bottle of bourbon, half empty. He vamps over to my bedside table and picks it up - examining the bottle. "Have you drank all of this?"
"No. Yeah. Maybe."
"You are in deep, DEEP, trouble!"
Because I'm still drunk, his words have no impact on me. I just shrug at him, nonchalantly.
He grabs me by the upper arm and pulls me to my feet.
"Get off of me" I slur as I futilely pull away from him.
"Hush!" He says as he drags me out my room and pulls me down the stairs. He pushes me and I land unceremoniously on to the sofa. Damon bites his wrist and tells me to drink his blood.
"Ew! No! I'm not drinking that! Don't be so gross!" I protest.
"You either drink it or I'll make you drink it. You need to sober up and this is the quickest way to do it."
"Yeah? Well I don't want to sober up, so get lost".
Before I realise what is happening, Damon has bit his previously healed wrist, drawing blood, and is pressing it against my mouth. I was sober in under a minute.
"Yuk! That's disgusting! Why would you do that? You weirdo!"
"Shut up and sit down, now!"
"Screw you!"
Damon swatted my bum 5 times before turning me to face him.
"Wanna try that again, little sister?" I shake my head no. "Good! Now sit down" this time I do as I'm told. Damon takes a seat on the table right in front of me and leans forward with his forearms resting on his knees and his hands clasped together.
"So, do you mind telling me what exactly happened to my room?" Damon asks me.
"No, not really!" I lean back on the sofa and do my best impression of a sloth.
"Lose the attitude.."
"Lose the idea that you actually have a right to be doing this right now".
"But I do have the right. As your big brother, I have every right to be doing this right now!"
"Wrong! You lost the right to act like this, the day you killed Zach. The same day you temporarily killed Stefan and threatened to hurt me".
I can feel traitorous tears welling up behind my eyes. So much for not caring anymore.
"Yeah... I know I messed up, but I'm going to put it right"
"You're leaving and never coming back?" I sit forward and he scrunches his face up as if he smells something foul.
"No!"
"Well how, then?"
"That, little sister, I don't know". "And why exactly should I trust you?" I ask him, returning to my previous position.
"Because I have kinda kept my promise, well, sort of. I mean I haven't killed anyone else".
I feign happiness.
"Oh, really? So you have only killed our family member? Well that's alright then, isn't it? Let's just hug it out and play happy families then, shall we?" I tsk and stand up.
"Listen Damon, I don't want to do this right now, I'm going to bed" I go to walk away
"That's too bad..." He wraps his arm around my waist, lifts me off my feet and places me face down over his lap. "Cos now is exactly when we're doing this". He lands a stinging swat to my rear.
"OW! What are you doing? You can't do this to me!"
"I'm spanking you, and, yes I can! Watch..." He gives me an extra hard swat.
"Ahh Damon! Get off me now" I struggle to get off his lap, but he just tightens his hold on my waist. He lets out a deep breath through his nose.
"Nope" he says, and with that he reigns blow after blow on my upturned behind.
I doesn't take long before I'm spewing out gut wrenching sobs. My tears aren't just from the spanking that is in process, but also from something deeper.
For the second time in my life, Damon cuts my spanking short. He flips me over so I'm no longer laying over his lap, but rather sitting up on it instead. I immediately bury my face in to the crook of his neck, my sobs still coming fast and strong.
"Hey, hey, hey! Calm down Sophia. What's wrong with you?" Damon says as he holds me with his left arm and stokes my hair with his right hand. I continue to cry, unable to stop myself. "Come on piccolo, talk to me. I can't help unless you let me!"
"It-it's all m-my f-f-fault!"
"What is...? What's all your fault?"
"Th-th-that Z-Zach is d-dead!"
I didn't think it was possible, but I'm crying even harder now. Saying that out loud has broke me.
"Shhhh-sh-sh-shh, calm down baby. Shhh... Come on piccolo, please..." Damon is trying his best to calm me, but it's not working.
I wake up in my own bed a few hours later. Damon is sitting on the lounger in front of my window, staring intently at me.
"What happened?"
"You fell asleep on me so I carried you to bed".
"Oh! Well that's not embarrassing!" I bury my face in my hands Damon laughed.
"It's not the first time, piccolo",
"I know! But it had better be the last!" We both laugh this time.
"Do you wanna tell what that was all about?" He asks me, talking about my hysterical crying.
"It-it's nothing", I try to brush it off. I don't want to talk about it. The guilt I feel over Zach's death is crippling, and I'm not in the mood for crying. Again.
"That, wasn't nothing! Talk to me - tell me what is bothering you". I can see he is not going to give up so I resign myself to telling him.
"It's my fault he is dead."
"How is it your fault? I specifically remember it being my hands that snapped Zach's neck - not yours!"
"I know I didn't kill him, but it's still my fault!"
"And how do you work that out, Inspector Clouseau?"
"I was the one that gave you the blood, in turn, that gave you the strength the kill Zach. Which means I am responsible for his death!"
"Nooo! I was the one who lured Caroline here and then compelled her to open the door."
"Wait... Caroline opened the door?" I forgot about seeing her running away.
"Yes, like I said, I compelled her too. Once the door opened, Zach came down the stairs and tried to push me back in the cell - so I snapped his neck!"
"Still, if I hadn't have you the blood, you wouldn't have been strong enough." I tried to explain to him.
"Sophia, even starved to near desiccation, I am still 100 times stronger than any human. The blood just stopped me looking all grey and gross!" He smiled at me.
"So I didn't have anything to do with it?"
"No princess, it was me. It was alllll me!"
I inhale a deep breath and feel all the guilt I have been harbouring, leave my body as the air left my lungs. The relief I feel knowing it wasn't my fault is indescribable.
"Thank you!" A confused look spreads across Damon's face.
"What for?" He asks.
"For telling me that. I mean, the way I have acted towards you lately, you didn't have to tell me."
"Yes I did! And I would have told you sooner if I'd have known that is what you were thinking. I love you, Sophia, regardless of what my actions may say!"
I nod my head, knowing he is telling the truth.
"So, are we going to hug it out and play happy families now?" He uses my earlier words against me. I let out a little laugh.
"Yeah, we can!"
"Good! Come on then" he stands up and opens his arms wide, "I'm waiting!" I leap off my bed and run over to him and jump up, wrapping my arms around his shoulders as he wraps his around my waist.
I pull my head back, mid hug, to look him in the eyes.
"You know, I'm still pretty pissed at you for what you did!" He swatted my bottom.
"Hey!"
"Language!" I roll my eyes. "Want another one? He asks me,
"No! What for?"
"Eye rolling"
"sorry!"
"apology accepted!". He gives me his sideways smile.
We finish our hug and then Damon puts me back on my feet. His face turns all serious.
"I know you're still mad at me for what I did, but I meant what I said before, I am going to make it up to you. I promise!"
"You know, I'm gonna hold you to that!"
"I expect you to expect me to."
"Ive had enough of this doom and gloom crap to last me a lifetime, let's have some fun?"
"That would be a great idea if it wasn't for the fact that it's waaay past your bedtime!"
"Oh, come on! You're kidding me, right? I've already been to sleep so I'm not even tired."
"Ok, how about popcorn and a movie?"
"Well, it's better than bed, I suppose, but I get to pick which one!"
"Fine. But no girly, lovey-dovey-weepy crap. It's gotta be action, blood and gore - the good stuff!"
I pick out Con Air. It's one of my favourite movies. Damon came in to the room carrying a massive bowl of popcorn, 2 bowls of ice cream, different bags of candy and drinks.
"You ready?" I call to him.
"What did you pick?"
"Con Air"
"Then I'm ready!" We settle down on the sofa and I hit the play button.
Half way through the movie, Damon gets up to pour himself a bourbon.
"How can you even drink that stuff? It's vile! Seriously, It's like drinking vervain!"
"You didn't mind it a couple of hours ago when you drank half the bottle!"
"Yes I did! After a couple, I think it numbed my tongue because the more I drank, the better it tasted. At first though, it tasted like shi...shoes" shoes? Shoes? Really? Why did I say shoes? Oh, I know, because he would flip out if I said shit! Shoes though?!
"Shoes?" He gives me a puzzled look before carrying on. "I know what you mean - I hate drinking shoes, too! Plus, the laces get stuck in your teeth!" I laugh out loud. He is too funny! I love him when he is like this.
"You're such a dufus!" I tell him.
"Yeah, but that why you love me, right?" He gives me his best Damon smile.
"Right" I reply, nodding my head.