My old middle school changed drastically. The once tall, proud building now had cracks everywhere. The closer I got, the more my anxiety rose. The inside didn't change one bit. The halls had a stale smell to them from the years of being left alone. It wasn't even that cold thanks to the lifeless vines that wrapped around the exterior which insulated the building. I walked to my old shoe locker and saw my name was still there. Kanade's locker was next to mine. I opened it and saw dead flowers. Some fell out from being packed inside.

"You never really liked flowers." I stated.

I closed it and went down the hall. The classrooms were all a mess. Papers, books, and utensils were scattered. Everyone was ordered to leave and never come back. It's not a surprise why things were messy. I walked up one floor. The school had six levels that included a basement. For Kanade, the roof was the seventh level. It was her escape from the world. It eventually became my escape after meeting her. I could still remember her bright personality and harsh words. She always kept her black hair in a low, messy bun. Her eyes were a sparkling green that matched the forest that surrounded us. She was my best friend and the only friend I've ever had.

"To be honest, I'm still confused why I'm still alive." I looked out a window and kept walking up to the next floor.

This one had our classroom. I walked to the familiar door and opened it. The stench of decay hit me. It came from the abundance of dead flowers on Kanade's desk. It looked like a bush of flowers on top of the desk that spilled over onto the chair and floor. I walked to me desk and saw writing. Even time couldn't erase those hateful words. Everyone loved Kanade. When she died, I became everyone's target.

"An eye for an eye. A life for a life. Time's up, murderer." I read some of the words on my desk. "Don't worry. My past will creep up on me and tear my body to shreds. Everyone will get their revenge." I said to the desk full of flowers. I took out a small wooden box. When I opened it, a melody played, echoing throughout the room. It was Kanade's favorite song and one she'd always sing to me.

"I hope you're at rest." I left the room and sighed.

I shook my head and kept going up until I made it to the roof. This was where we'd be most of the time. We'd eat lunch and do our homework here. The fence that used to stand was broken and rusted. Faded police tape blew in the wind.

"This is it, the seventh level."

Tied to the fence was Kanade's black scarf next to my red scarf. It hadn't moved since we tied it there all those years back. "Kanade…" I sat in front of the scarf and touched it. It had lost the softness it once had. My eyes burned.

"It's hard, you know? I can't see you, hear your brash voice, or even feel your hand on my shoulder anymore."

I stuffed my face into the scarf. I'd never get that moment back. I'll never get you back, Kanade. "Everyone thought you were happy, but I knew how you really felt. You were abused by your family. Even when you were put with another family, they still took advantage of you. The only thing that made you feel better was being around me. That's why you stayed in school. I kept you sane the same way you kept me sane." I looked through the remnants of the fence.

"No matter what I said, no one believed me. They were blinded by grief to see the truth." Tears were falling down my cheeks. I couldn't stop them. My grip on the scarf tightened. "Because I lived, I'm destined to be punished for the rest of my life." I stood and walked to the edge. This was where we were years ago.

"Stop!" I gasped from surprise. I thought I was alone. I turned and saw a guy that looked familiar. "No way. Shiori?"

"Kazuma?" Kazuma was one of my classmates when I went here. He ran over and dragged me away from the edge.

"What the hell were you thinking? You may have survived the first time, but you probably won't survive the second."

"I wasn't going to jump." I said quietly.

"After what you and Kanade did that day, I don't think I could believe you."

"I really wasn't." I said before silence overcame the rooftop.

"You cut your hair. I've only seen you with really long hair, so seeing it short is weird." He played with my hair.

"I have my reasons."

"So, if you didn't come here to jump, what did you come here to do?" He asked curiously.

"I came to face my past." I explained.

"Face it? What do you have to face?"

"I haven't been able to accept anything."

He hummed and nodded. "Seems legit. Since you're here, let's go eat. I'm hungry."

"Huh?"

"Let's go, Shiori." I couldn't give an answer. Kazuma immediately started to drag me all the way down the stairs with a solid grip. "You know, Kanade and I dated." He said out of the blue.

"What? You don't seem like her type."

"That's what she thought too. Other than you, I knew what bothered her and how she thought." His voice was serious. His grip on my wrist tightened.

"You should have pushed me off then."

"I know you didn't do it, Shiori."

I tensed up. "How?"

"I found her journal after you disappeared from town. If she didn't write about the abuse, she talked about her sunshine."

"I see."

When we got down to the last floor, Kazuma went to my old shoe locker and opened it. To my surprise, there were many letters were piled inside. "What's all of this?" I asked.

"They're letters to you from everyone. Once everyone realized you wouldn't have pushed her, they all wrote letters hoping you'd come back."

"And years later, here I am." Kazuma took out a plastic bag and filled it with the letters. There were even flowers in there.

"We were focused on Kanade that we didn't realize you were the one that needed help just as much as her. You needed help and we all turned our backs on you. Unlike everyone else, I saw the whole thing. Kanade told me not to go to school that day, but I came anyway. That's when I saw you two." Kazuma explained. I stared at the floor. I couldn't believe what was happening. "She loved you, Shiori. She loved you more than she loved everyone in the world. Knowing Kanade, dying alone would be too painful. I knew at that time you wanted the same thing, but she didn't want that for you."

"How are you so sure about that?" I asked.

Kazuma handed me a notebook. "This is her journal. Take it."

"Why? Why do you even have it on you?"

"I always have it on me to read it from time to time. My wounds have all healed, but yours are far from closing. It'll help."

"Thank you." I took it and held it close to my chest.

"I'm serious about eating, though. I haven't eaten in hours."

"I guess lunch wouldn't hurt." I said with a small smile.

"Wonderful! This way!" A few minutes later, we were at a rather large place. "It'll be my treat. Get anything you want."

"Okay."

We went to a local diner and sat down. A waitress handed us menus. I looked through it and could feel my mouth fill with saliva. I didn't want to break his wallet. Xanxus is the only one that can pay to fill me.

"Go ahead and get as much as you want. I'm aware of your black hole stomach." Kazuma said with a big smile. Kanade must have written something in her journal about it.

I sighed and gave in. "I'll get the large beef bowl set."

He whistled. "When Kanade wrote about how much you could eat, I couldn't believe it. I can't wait for the food to get here to see if you can handle the beef set."

Twenty minutes have passed. I was in the middle of my meal while Kazuma just watched with awe. "Kazuma?" We turned and saw a girl around out age.

"Hey, Tsubasa, look who I ran into."

She looked at me. "Who is she?"

"You don't recognize her? It's Shiori."

Her eyes widened. "No way! It can't be." She got right in my face. "Yup. It's Shiori alright."

"You're being creepy as usual, Tsubasa." Kazuma said with a dull expression.

"Shiori never jumps or flinches when anyone gets right in her face. She's the only one I know that's like that. How've you been? It's been years." Her deep blue hair was put in a braid that hung off her left shoulder. Her glasses perfectly framed her brown eyes.

"I've been as well as I can be." I replied.

"Have you been doing anything interesting lately?" Tsubasa asked, pushing Kazuma to the side to sit.

"Well, I was in a play in Tokyo. I happened to get one of the lead roles."

"Really? Our class was in Tokyo to see a play recently. What character did you play?" She asked.

"I was Bern the witch of miracles."

Their eyes widened, Kazuma choked on his food. "That was you?!" They shouted with shock. They were getting everyone's attention.

"Keep it down. You're bothering everyone." I scolded.

"I can't believe it. You're not the type of person to be on stage." Kazuma said, leaning back into the booth.

"Seriously! Out of everyone in the world, I wouldn't have guessed the quiet, cute book nerd would want all that attention." Tsubasa added.

"I was just as surprised, but my club members helped me." I said.

"What club are you a part of?" Kazuma asked.

"Archery." The two looked at each other and smiled brightly. "Why are you two being weird?" I took another bite.

"You've changed a lot, Shiori." Kazuma said.

"It's to be expected with time."

"You're almost the opposite person you were in middle school." Kazuma said happily.

"Did you make any friends?" Tsubasa asked me.

I hummed in thought. I guess I could count Xanxus and his group of strange people. "I guess I have. They're strange though."

"It doesn't matter how strange friends are. The stranger the better in my opinion." Tsubasa was absolutely shining like the sun. "I have to go. I'll see you two around." She ran out of the restaurant.

"What's her problem?" I asked.

"It's Tsubasa. She got even more energy over the years."

"I never thought it'd be possible." Kazuma laughed at my words.

When I finished my meal, I gave a sigh of content. The food was just as delicious as I remembered. "Damn you can eat."

"I'm a black hole for a reason."

Kazuma and I walked around Kyoto. It was fairly peaceful and for some reason, my heart felt a little bit lighter. "There you are." We saw Kazuma's parents. "I thought you'd be at the school and not with some girl." His dad teased. "Would you like to introduce us?" His mother asked.

"Guys, this is Shiori. She was my classmate a few years ago. You should remember her." They looked at me. Their eyes slowly widened.

"How could we have forgotten? You've changed so much, dear." Kazuma's mother said sweetly.

"It must have been the short hair. No one seems to recognize me." I said nervously, playing with a strand of my hair.

"I'm glad you came back for a visit. If you don't have a place to stay tonight, you're more than welcome to stay at our house."

"Thank you. I might just take you up on that offer."

Dino went back to Shiori's the next day to check up on her. Reborn and Tsuna were also worried about her. They didn't know if she'd do anything with her father in the hospital. Squalo was inside, sitting at the table. "Squalo?"

"Where is she?"

She wasn't home. Did the Hibari come and kidnap her? "I don't know. What are you doing here?" Dino asked.

"Call her!" Dino called her number after Squalo yelled.

"Hello?" Shiori sounded out of it.

"Where are you?" Dino said in a loud, worried voice.

"It's too early in the morning, Dino. Shut up. I'm in Kyoto." Shiori's voice was groggy and irritated.

"What are you doing there?"

"I'm visiting."

"Who's that, Shiori?" A man's voice asked.

"Get away from her, dumbass! Let Shiori be!" A woman's voice yelled. Shiori groaned.

"You sound like you're having fun." Dino commented.

"Fun is the wrong and complete opposite word to describe this."

"I was worried. You didn't tell me you were going anywhere."

"I don't need to tell you where I'm going." She said. The two voices gasped.

"Is he your boyfriend?" The woman asked.

Shiori let out a gasp. "T-there's no way I'd date anyone like that idiot!" Her voice was higher pitched and a lot different than usual. It surprised Dino and Squalo but it was a pleasant surprise.

"I'd never date you, Shiori. I'm sure Xanxus wouldn't allow it. He might just kill me."

"Xanxus?" The woman said.

"That's an Italian name. Shiori, are you with an Italian man?" The man asked.

At this point, Shiori was making noises of embarrassment. It took Dino all he had to not laugh. Shiori would be mad and tell Xanxus to hunt him down. "You're adorable, Shiori. It's much different than what we remember. You wouldn't even make a single peep."

"Tsubasa! Leave me alone!"

"If it makes you react like this, I'll never leave you alone."

"I'll call you back." Shiori said in an irritated tone before hanging up.

"Well?" Dino looked over at Squalo who was sitting on Shiori's couch. "She's having fun with friends."

"We're her only friends." Squalo said.

"They're friends from years ago. Don't be too jealous, Squalo."

"I'm not jealous."

"So, why are you here?"

"Xanxus lost his connection with Shiori and sent me to see if she was still alive."

"As you heard, she's still very much alive." Dino said cheerfully.

Squalo knew something was wrong the second he entered the house. It was empty and cold. "Dino, what's going on with Shiori?" Squalo asked with a type of seriousness Dino's never heard from him in years.

"What do you mean?"

"Why does the house feel so empty?"

Dino immediately shrunk. "I'm not sure if you'll like it, Squalo."

"Just tell me."

"You can't tell anyone or let Shiori you know about this."

"Why not?"

"If you tell Xanxus, he will come to Japan and create a massacre." Dino said.

Squalo hesitated. "I promise."

Dino nodded. "Shiori's father was attacked by the family that's after her. Right now, he's in a coma. The probability of him waking up is slim and the possibility of death is almost certain. We're hoping for the best and that may be waiting for him to die peacefully in his sleep."

Squalo's eyes widened. Those people were going to break Shiori any and every way possible. First, they brainwashed her mother into hating them and now this? Squalo couldn't even express what he was feeling. "And she's in Kyoto? Why isn't she by her dad's side?" Squalo snapped.

"I think it might be what we talking about the other day. She's facing her past." Dino said.

"Alone?"

"I'm not sure."

Squalo left Shiori's house and went to the hospital. He saw Shamal in the hall. Their surprised eyes locked with each other. "Squalo? What's the Varia doing here?"

"I'm looking for someone."

"Who?"

"Do you know Shiori Mori?" Squalo asked.

"What about her?" Shamal was cautious. Squalo wasn't one to visit anyone other than Xanxus in the hospital.

"I'm looking for her father."

"I won't allow you to kill him. I don't care if you were paid by the Hibari family." Shamal didn't know the Hibari would go to the Vongola to get a single civilian man assassinated.

"I'm not going to kill him."

This surprised Shamal. "What's your reasoning to see him?" He asked.

"I want to see what those bastards did to him."

Shamal let Squalo follow him into the room. Squalo walked to the bed and saw how broken he was. His clenched fist shook. "How do you know him?" Shamal questioned.

"You can't let anyone know of the Varia's relationship with Shiori."

Shamal's eyes widened. "Does she know you're an assassin? Does she know about the Vongola?"

"I'm not too sure. We never speak about the family or our jobs." Squalo answered honestly. He had no idea. They all made sure none of them would leave a single trace for Shiori to find. Shiori must be torn. She shouldn't be in Kyoto. She should be here.

"Will you do anything?" Shamal asked.

"I can't. It's something she needs to deal with."

"And if she gets injured?"

"I don't know." Silence filled the room as Shamal did his daily checkup. "Will he die?" Squalo asked.

"The best that can happen is he'll die from a heart attack and go in his sleep. He can't feel any pain right now."

"How did Shiori handle it?" Squalo asked, keeping his eyes on Shiori's dad.

"She handled better than she should have. I'm worried about her." Shamal admitted.

"She'll be fine."

"How are you sure?"

"It's Shiori. She's strong." That's what Squalo wanted to believed. However, there was a soft, cruel voice in the back of his head telling him she wouldn't be alright. She'll be alone and unpredictable. No one would know what she'd do.

Kazuma and I went back to the school. "This is it." In front of me was a grave stone. It was behind the school itself. It was Kanade's grave. She's buried underneath where I stood. I wasn't able to go to her funeral because I was recovering in the hospital. Even when I was discharged months later, I refused to visit. I didn't want to face the truth.

"I didn't expect her grave to be at the school." I said softly. I crouched down and touched the gravestone. It was cold.

"She wrote down what she wanted the night before." Kazuma said.

"I see." Where would I have wanted to be buried? I guess I never gave much thought about it like Kanade did. Though, she was always a planner.

"Did you have everything planned out like Kanade?" Kazuma asked.

"All I wanted on that day was to die with my best friend. Nothing else mattered."

"Do you still feel that way now?" He asked.

"I'm not sure anymore. During the days I can't wait for tomorrow, I feel guilty. I feel like I should want to die."

"For Kanade's sake?" I nodded. Kazuma crouched next to me. "I don't think she would have held you just for you two to be in each other's arms. I can't speak for Kanade, but I don't think she wanted you to die. It's why she spun you two so you'd have some chance of survival." Kazuma explained.

"Why do you think that?"

He hesitated to speak. That bothered me even more. "Kanade didn't tell you the whole story."

"Huh?"

"I think it's better if you were to read her journal yourself." What did Kanade not tell me? It must be big if Kazuma thinks she saved my life.

Dino was waiting for me at home, but I doubted he'd actually stay. It was already pretty late. I don't know why he wanted to stay, but I still allowed it. He'd probably be questioning me about everything that happened. I wasn't prepared for the questions.

"Welcome back." Dino greeted as soon as I walked in.

"You're still here?" I questioned.

"It's always nice to have someone welcoming you home. How was Kyoto?"

"Draining." I set the bag on the coffee table. It was filled with letters that my classmates wrote me.

"Did you take care of what you wanted to take care of?" Dino asked.

"I sort of did." He handed me some chocolate I've never seen before. "What's this?"

"Squalo came by looking for you and dropped this off. He said you'd probably like it." Squalo probably had business and swung by to see how I was. At least he didn't hate me for leaving unexpectedly. I wonder if the rest feel the same. I took the chocolate.

"Thank you."

"Where did you get that scarf?" Dino asked in reference to the black scarf around my neck.

"It belonged to a friend of mine."

Dino seemed surprised. "You have a friend you're willing to call a friend?"

"Shut up and yes." I sat down and took a bite of the chocolate. It was dark chocolate with an orange crème on the inside. It instantly made me relax.

"Is your friend one of the two I heard on the phone?"

"No. They're too annoying." Tsubasa made sure to see me off. She wouldn't stop hugging me and gave me a muffin from her family's bakery. Kazuma gave me some of Kanade's possessions.

"You look down. What's wrong? It can't possibly be the chocolate."

"It's a personal matter." I responded.

"Do you want to talk about it? You can be as vague as possible."

"Will you tell anyone?" I asked.

"Nope."

"Are you sure? Squalo and Xanxus could make you talk."

Dino smiled like the idiot he is. "While that is true, I doubt they'll ask. If they do, I'll give them a fake answer."

"If they hear about this, I'll send scary people after you, Dino."

He instantly paled. He knew I'd do it. "Yes, ma'am."

I took a deep breath. "I used to have a friend. She was my best and only friend. She could see through me unlike everyone else. There was no one else who was like her." It was hard to say her name. The word stopped from coming out. "She…Kanade jumped."

Dino's face stayed neutral. "I'm sorry, Shiori."

"The world hated her just like it hated me. Sure, we faced different things, but we felt safe with each other. She was the only one that knew what happened to me. She was the only one I could trust. She didn't think I was a monster. I still can't get over her death."

"Why?" He asked.

"I thought I knew everything about her, but I was wrong."

"What did you find out?" Dino's voice was calming and didn't make me feel anxious.

I put the journal on the table. "This was her journal. She wanted me to have this. I don't know what's written in here or what I'll read. I don't know if I can even open it. I'll probably be more confused than I already am."

"Just take it one entry at a time. Don't force yourself to read the entire thing." Dino encouraged.

"I don't think I can. This has hung over my shoulder for years. Only now people are apologizing to me." Dino stayed silent. "I'm going to see dad."

"Call if you need me, Shiori. We'll all be here for you." I wasn't too sure about that. I'm not sure if everyone would be there. "Shiori." I looked up at Dino. "They're worried about you too."

"Huh?"

"I'm learning how to read your expressions. Squalo hasn't caught on yet."

I gave him a small smile. "Where he lacks, you excel."

"Wait. Is that an insult?"

"Yes."