Eighteen days ago…
Julius Juukulius, more commonly known as Lugunica's Greatest Knight, has been part of many rescue operations in his life. But that doesn't make him hate them any less. Doubt, uncertainty, and fear home in Julius' heart as he races towards the location Bordeaux marked on his map.
He is accompanied by ten knights and a handful of healers, but no one utters even a single word. The only sound around them is produced by the ground dragons they ride, and the occasional bird flying by.
Not that Julius expected them to act any different, the situation is dire and the mood is grim. Rescue operations often are.
Fourteen years after the first expedition to subjugate the White whale, a new one was finally arranged.
Under any other circumstances, Julius would probably celebrate it. Every child in Julius' generation had looked up to the previous Sword Saint, Theresia Van Astrea, so it would be only natural that they wanted to avenge her—no, not only her, but also the thousands of hundreds who died during its attacks.
But there was nothing to celebrate, for the Whale's mist had already abandoned the area and no news, either good or bad, was sent back from the battlefront.
Felix Argyle, one of Julius' closest friends in the corps, had been one of the knights selected to be part of it. And as sad as he is that another tragedy was added to Lugunica's history books, his well-being is the only thing on Julius' mind.
No news meant no reports, and no reports meant the entire group could be dead. Julius' only comfort is that his friend is a healer, and healers don't usually join the battle. They instead watch from the sidelines, healing, supporting.
…but the mabeasts didn't care about those things. If Ferris were okay, Julius is sure that his friend would have at least tried to make contact with the garrison. But he hasn't, and the violet-haired man can't help but grit his teeth and fear the worst.
When he heard Commander Marcos was calling the Royal Knights for an emergency meeting, Julius got very curious. He had expected, naively, that it had something to do with the Royal Election his kingdom was currently holding. But that innocent interest soon turned into excitement and finally horror when the older man explained the gravity of the situation at hand.
With the combined efforts of the Royal Army and the duchy of Karsten, the latest apparition of the White Whale had been predicted. The Duke, with the support of some members of the Royal Army, sent a group of knights to fight it, but hours later, no soldier reported back.
The gathering ended after the Captain informed a rescue operation was being organized and set to part in an hour.
Julius cursed under his breath and resisted the urge to volunteer for it. Even if he was a Royal Knight, he now was under Lady Anastasia's service, which meant he could no longer could make job-related decisions on his own.
But to Julius' relief and disbelief, moments after the meeting ended he was told Lady Anastasia was already aware of the situation and ordering him to join. He also learnt that before anyone even briefed her, she sent Mimi to Marcos with a letter. In it, she explicitly informed the Captain of the Royal Knights that her personal knight was at his disposal for any emergency rescue operation he needed to organize.
He was not asked how his Lady knew about the failed expedition, they didn't need to. Anastasia Hoshin always has eyes everywhere, especially since the Royal Election started. Julius himself had been aware of the fact that the duchy of Karsten was buying more weapons than usual, but he hadn't considered the possibility of them doing something as big as hunting one of the three Great Mabeasts.
Julius isn't naïve enough to believe Anastasia's order to join the rescue operation was out of goodwill. But as cruel as it sounds, Julius doesn't mind it: her merchant-like personality is one of the reasons he believes her to be the best option for Lugunica's future.
A bright future he wants to share with his family and friends. A bright future Julius hopes Ferris will get to see.
Even if Julius' group hasn't reached its destination yet, the air is already tense and unpleasant. They don't expect to find anything other than a tragedy.
He is trying to even his breath when a voice breaks him out of his grim thoughts, "Sir—!" the despair on the knight's voice and the smell of iron reach him long before the sight of the first corpse does.
For his immense relief, they not only find torn corpses but living breathing people too. They are in a bad shape, but Julius suspects the psychological damage is much worse than all their physical wounds put together. To lose so many of your friends and still not be able to defeat your foe would break even the strongest of warriors.
Added to that, the Whale's mist often left people confused, sometimes to the point of them never regaining full possession of their faculties. It didn't happen often, but it was common enough the Royal Army took notice of it.
The healers work non-stop as they keep looking for survivors, but to Julius' distress there is still no sign of any brown-haired demi-human.
Julius stands up straight and carries one of the wounded they just found, an older man with short white-gray hair and yellow eyes, he looks tired but mostly alright. Julius doesn't know him.
As per accord of the joint efforts, most of the knights who joined the expedition were part of the duchy of Karsten. A foolish decision, because as strong as they were, they lacked the raw power someone like the Sword Saint had. If Theresia had failed, why wouldn't they? To deduce the location of the White Whale and not call for Reinhard's assistance was inexcusable.
At first, Julius thought the duke might have not liked the possibility of sacrificing yet another Sword Saint to the mabeast. But then he remembered that Ferris' adopted father isn't the kind of man who would put a bloodline over the safety of his people, or even his own happiness.
Even when Duchess Helena failed to give him an heir, he opted to stay with her until the day she died and appointed their adopted son as the next duke. He had never even considered marrying again.
When Julius finds yet another body, he kneels down next to it and searches for a pulse, a sign of life, anything. Unlike most of the other knights he found, this one is young and barely older than him. He isn't brown haired or demi-human, but bile still rises in his throat, his soft face somehow reminds him of Ferris.
His hopes about the unknown knight not being dead soon disappear when he notices how crushed the left side of his head was. He isn't a healer, but he knows no one other than Ferris and maybe Reinhard could survive these types of wounds.
That's when Julius decides the word 'foolish' isn't nearly enough to describe the person who was responsible of such carnage. He is about to call for Bordeaux when Ia, one of his six spirits, calls for his attention.
The moment he hears what Ia has to say, he inhales deeply.
Julius' heart gallops as he rushes over to Flugel's Tree and follows his little sprout. His eyes, huge and scared, search for something he still cannot see. He ignores his fellow knights as they ask what's wrong…for only meters away from them, between a collection of mangled bodies and wrecked carts, lies a barely-conscious Felix Argyle.
"Ferris!" Julius exclaims in relief. His friend looks bad: his clothes are both torn, and soaked in dry blood… but he is alive, and as long as he is alive, he can get better.
Julius doesn't even question why Ferris hasn't healed himself yet. The Greatest Knight just wants to hug his friend and cry tears of joy, but he finds himself too short of time for that. He needs to take Ferris to the healers.
He rushes to pick him up when his friend stops him mid motion, "Julius—don't!"
Julius stares confusedly at his friend, he doesn't look trapped and there is no evident reason for not moving him. Ferris interrupts him before he has a chance to ask what's wrong. Once he does, his friend's plea sends a glacial chill through his back.
"—I still haven't found Fourier, you nyeed to help me find him!"
Julius feels his heart stop for the second time in twenty four hours. "W—What?" he asks, unsure whether he heard his friend right.
"His Highness Fourier isn't here—I—Ferris doesn't knyow where he is! He was right besides Ferris for a myoment and then—!" his friend moves his arms hastily around his body. "Ferris hasn't been able to find him!" he repeats, voice breaking.
Julius knew the whale's mist often left people confused and delirious, but not even in his wildest nightmares had he imagined Ferris would ever forget about Fourier's death, "Ferris…" he whispers, horrified of his friend's request. How was he supposed to help Ferris search for Fourier? His Royal Highness Fourier was miles away from the Flugel Tree, buried near the Palace at the Royal Cemetery.
"—dyon't just stand there!" Ferris shrieks, making Julius flinch at the desperation in his voice. He can see his friend is barely holding it together: his eyes are huge and red from crying, and his entire body is trembling, probably because of the many hours he most likely spent searching for Fourier. "He could be hurt—I don't knyow what state he's in!"
Julius sees one of the healers run towards them from the corner of his eyes. Ferris' pleas are beginning to gather the attention of the other knights.
"Stop! Don't waste your efforts on mye when his Highness could be in danger!" Ferris begs once again. Julius isn't unfamiliar with heartbreaking sights, but as Julius watches the tears fall from his friend's face, and hears the anxious tone in his voice, he feels he is about to throw up.
Fourier was the only reason his friend decided to become a Royal Knight. He was already the Karsten's heir; he didn't need to join them. Yet he did, only so he could become the Fourth Prince's right hand man.
It takes him a moment to gather his breath. "…His Highness Fourier was here, fighting the Whale with you?" Julius inquires, voice unsure.
"Yes!" his friend snaps. The newly arrived healer tries to get near Ferris, but Julius grabs his arm and stops him. He doesn't think the Blue would let anyone touch him right now, not when he thinks his Highness is in danger. The man, startled, stares in confusion at the duo.
"Sir Ju—?" he starts.
"His Highness Fourier is dead, has been for more than a year now," Julius announces. He isn't stupid; he knows the best option would be to tell Ferris Fourier has already been found and that the only one who needed assistance was him. But he can't, he knows Ferris would never forgive him if he lied about his Highness' well-being.
He wouldn't forgive himself either, and it has nothing to do with him being a Spirit Knight.
The brown haired knight's reaction is immediate. "What are you—? Lies, lies, lies!" Ferris cries out. Something in his tear-streaked face darkens as he says those words. "Why are you saying that? Fourier is alive, he was right besides Ferris during the battle—he was—!"
"He is dead," Julius' own tone crumples as he interrupts his dear friend. He grits his teeth and looks away: he cannot bear to watch Ferris go through this again. He had severely underestimated the mabeast's abilities to confuse its victims' minds.
"Styop lying!" Ferris cries out as he stands up and starts rashly limping towards his right. His legs are shaking and visibly wounded. It finally hits Julius that the reason Ferris isn't healing himself is that he's saving all his mana for the moment he found Fourier. "I nyeed to find him—he needs my help," his friend stumbles – he is no state to walk – and Julius hurries to help him. A big mistake on his part, because the moment Ferris notices his fast approaching form, he lashes out at him and tries to brush Julius' torso with his hands.
Julius dodges Ferris' attack easily, but he still tenses and takes a step back.
Ferris may not be combat-orientated, but water magic could be lethal when performed by a competent healer. Julius' lips remain thin as he rests his hand on his sword pommel—he doesn't unsheathe it though, to do so would only anger Ferris more.
He acknowledges his friend is attacking because he wants to protect Fourier, but it doesn't stop Julius from feeling taken aback. He never expected to cross swords with Ferris on anything other than a friendly spar.
Julius doesn't want to harm Ferris. He isn't angry at his fellow knight for aiming a deadly attack at him, he is only worried about him and his health, as he knows a mentally sound Felix Argyle would never even consider fighting a friend. "You are hurt Ferris, the whale's mist frequently leaves people confused, please let us help you!"
"Traitors, the lyot of you—!" Ferris' eyes flash red as he lunges at Julius with a short sword. As Julius dodges the several slashes directed at him, the violet-haired man distantly remembers that Lord Meckart gifted Ferris that weapon, years ago.
Julius clenches his jaw as Ferris continues attacking him, "Ferris, stop this madness!" Julius doesn't want to draw his sword, he doesn't want to hurt his friend any more than his words already did. "Remember the Royal Election, the Sage Council—think about it!"
"It doesn't matter—I was with him! He wore an armor—he…? " Ferris' tears don't stop flowing even when his ramblings come to halt. "Wrong, you are all wrong he—"
Julius curses their luck as he considers the options in front of him. His friend's wounds reopened since he continued to move, but Ferris still refused to heal himself. On the contrary, the demi-human's attacks were coming even faster. It was obvious Ferris was becoming more and more agitated as he understood Julius wouldn't back off and that he had no hope of winning a fight against a Spirit Knight.
Between a rock and a hard place, Julius accepts that the only way to help his friend is to knock him out for the moment.
Please Ferris, Fourier, forgive me for what I'm about to do, Julius thinks as he moves towards his friend's left side and calls for his spirits. I know I won't, he finishes. As expected, the Greatest Knight is much faster than a hurt Blue. In a single movement, he strikes his friend unconscious.
The way back to the Capital is sour and quiet. Knights and healers are both equally exhausted and, once again, not in the mood to talk.
The survivors were more than they had expected but considerably less than they had hoped. Because of the nature of the White Whale's attacks, many of the corpses they found were in such an appalling condition it was going to be difficult to recognize them.
Every knight knows their life is always at risk, but the idea of being crushed by the White Whale sends shivers down the violet-haired man's spine.
He would always take the Whale over the Rabbit or the Snake, but only by a small margin.
Unlike the previous morning, when the knights headed towards the Flugel Tree, the Greatest Knight isn't riding a ground dragon, but sitting in one of the carts along the wounded. Next to him rests a despondent Felix Argyle, who, silent as a tomb, hasn't uttered a word ever since they left the clearing.
As glad as he is that Ferris stopped screaming at him, he doesn't believe a quiet, dead-like Ferris is any better. Julius clenches his fists as he thinks about the many names his fellow knight called him after he woke up: 'traitor' had been the kindest word his friend threw at him
Because Julius had been the one who knocked him out and took him to a tent, he is the one who was accused of keeping him apart from Fourier. Julius would tell his friend time and time again that the whale's mist was affecting him and that his Highness was gone, but the confused knight just wouldn't accept it.
Julius doesn't say anything either as they ride; he is too emotionally drained for it.
He is perfectly aware Ferris was delirious and didn't really mean the things he said… He also understands it's all the Whale's fault and not his friend's—but Ferris' words still hurt.
He hadn't known the fourth Prince nearly as well as Ferris, but he too had respected and admired the man. Not because of his blood but because of his words: Fourier Lugunica was a Royal Julius was proud to serve.
"—if the Royal Family is truly gone, why are we even wearing this uniform?" Ferris' unexpected voice startles Julius. The healer's tone is flat and weak, but his words, sharper than broken glass, cut Julius' core deeper than any weapon ever could. His friend's eyes are glaring at the floor, but Julius is sure he is seeing something very different to the wooden boards in front of him. "A knight that cannot save its liege is no different than a sword without edge."
Ferris' voice rings in Julius' head, but he can't disagree with anything his friend just said, for The Royal Guard had almost been disbanded once, already.
Back when Ford Lugunica's only daughter was kidnapped right in front of everyone's noses, people started to wonder whether the group led by Theresia van Astrea was competent enough to protect something as important as the Royal Family.
But Ferris' words are as hurtful as they are truths. They had been right to doubt: they showed once again their incompetence only fourteen years later, when they failed to save even a single member of the Royal Family. What's the point of mastering the Spirit Arts and becoming a talented swordsman if he is still incapable of doing his job? Fifteen months afterwards, Julius still doesn't have an answer.
Julius isn't as strong or talented as Reinhard, and Reinhard wasn't enough to save the King either. He knows he might one day face a foe capable of killing both him and his Lady, but Julius won't let that stop him.
The death of the Royal Family had been a turning point for everyone in the Royal Army, and the day he swore himself to Lady Anastasia, he renewed his vows to protect the future of his country. Watch after the Kingdom in our absence, those had been the last orders of his King, and just because he no longer was besides them, it didn't mean his legacy didn't live on.
Nonetheless, trepidation grows and grows in Lugunica's Greatest Knight's heart with each of Felix's words. Even if Ferris technically insulted the entire forces, the self-blame is evident in his tone.
"You are right," Julius begins, making his friend raise an eyebrow at him. "We failed them, we all did, and we don't deserve to wear this uniform." Ferris doesn't turn to meet his face. "But His Majesty wouldn't have wanted us to give up either. He himself said that we should protect the Kingdom in his absence,"
Ferris's only answer is a bitter laugh, "it all comes down to myoving on, doesn't it?" his friend starts, "what a Julius thing to say, nya."
The spirit user blinks, startled and a little perturbed. He isn't sure what his friend meant by those words, but they didn't sound like a compliment, "Why would you say that?"
Ferris has no qualms about answering Julius' question "because you had no trouble finding yourself a new liege, didn't you nya? You think Lady Anastasia is the best thing to happen to Lugunica since the wheel," Ferris finishes mockingly.
Julius stiffens, taken aback by his friend's spiteful words. Unlike Ferris' delirious insults only hours ago, these ones felt far more personal. "It's not fair of you to say this," Julius has trouble finding his own voice, "It's not fair at all," he says, every muscle in his body tense.
For how long had Ferris felt that way about Julius and Lady Anastasia? Did he disagree with the Royal election as a whole? He knew his Lady was interested in Ferris, for the Blue wasn't only the key to the Karsten's domain but the greatest healer in this side of the Waterfall, but after the demi-human's words, Julius doesn't believe his friend will ever join a camp, much less Julius'.
"Whatever," Ferris scoffs, "Ferris knyows he's telling the truth."
"It's not like that at all—!" Julius continues, hurt. "I understand you miss Fourier! But Reinhard and I both—!"
Julius knows better than anyone how Reinhard felt about the entire matter. The Sword Saint still thought the death of the Royal Family was his own personal failure.
"This has nothing to do with Fourier!" Ferris cries out loud. Julius' spirits tell him the other knights finally noticed their conversation. "The throne belongs to the Royal Family, this is the Dragon Kingdom Lugunica— not the Dragon Kingdom whatever! The Royal Family are the Lugunica and only the Lugunica, we don't need another set of Royals."
Julius grits his teeth and curses his inability to find better words to help his friend "…they are dead Fe—"
"I know that!" Ferris screams, making Julius shut up with an audible click. For a moment neither of them says a single word. "Ferris knows that…" he repeats, eyes shining once again. "But… we still have the Sage Council, we…"
Ferris' mind remains a tangled mess. He still thinks Fourier had been with him during the battle, but he also knows his Highness was dead. No, he is sure his Highness is dead, he was at the Palace when his entire family died, but… but…?
"The Kingdom needs more than a council," Julius says softly, trying to make his voice sound as conciliatory as possible. Ferris doesn't answer: he is too busy going over his memories and failing to understand why they don't make any sense at all, "the pact with the Dragon—"
"To hell with the pact," Ferris spits and Julius closes his eyes, he already knew the demi-human blames Volcanica of Fourier's death. "This Kingdom needs more than a dragon," his friend throws Julius' words back at him.
Julius doesn't know what to say, so he just stares at his crying friend with upset, tired eyes. "Fourier wouldn't want you to mourn forever," he says, dejectedly. "He would want you to remember him with a smile, not with a crying face."
"So you care about Fourier's opinion nyow," Ferris retorts, and Julius feels another unfair stab reach his heart.
"The Kingdom needs to move on—"
"Well, maybe…maybe Ferris doesn't want to!"
Julius freezes. Ferris' tears, along with those words, leave a horrifying knot in his stomach. To hear Ferris admit he thought he was betraying Fourier by moving on…
Julius was no stranger to loss. He had lost his parents when he was young and he had almost lost Joshua, several times, thanks to the unjust and cruel illness his brother suffered. But Joshua didn't want to die, he wanted to live more than anyone Julius ever met, and his parents hadn't wanted to leave their side, either.
Suicide was an ugly, disgusting thing Julius never thought a friend of him would ever consider. He truly wants to believe he is misinterpreting Ferris' words.
"Ferris, please don't say something so horrible," Julius admonishes his heartbroken friend. "Even if you hate me because of my choices, I still consider you my precious friend and care about you." His friend doesn't say a word, and instead returns to stare at the wooden boards in front of him, "and his Highness did too, he loved you and would have hated himself if you did something drastic in his name… he would have wanted to hold your hand forever, had he had the chance, but—"
Julius cuts his own speech when he hears Ferris growl. His friend doesn't give him a proper answer, and instead just glares even more strongly at the floor. It worries Julius, no matter how famous he had become as a knight, he has never been particularly talented at talking to his friends.
He doesn't want to force another conversation with Ferris when he isn't really up to it, but…
"Ferris?" he asks, gathering courage "I—"
"You are lying again." Ferris interrupts, eyes downcast.
Julius frowns and lowers his head. He keeps worsening the situation and he doesn't even understand what he is doing so wrong, "Why... why do you believe that?"
Ferris tone is still detached and bitter as he speaks, "Even if Fourier had had the opportunity to stay by Ferris' side, he would have chosen to leave."
Julius' eyebrows rise up. Truthfully, the Greatest Knight has no way of knowing what his friend is thinking about. Especially considering Ferris never told his fellow knights that his Highness Fourier had forced Ferris to promise him he wouldn't bring him back to life using the Immortal King's Sacrament.
…but that doesn't stop the slightly older knight from trying to make sense of his friend's words, "The mist must have affected you more than expected, because I assure you: Fourier would have moved earth and heaven to stay with you. And I promise you this as a Spirit Knight."
Julius gives his friend a sad, side smile when Ferris turns his head to stare at him. His eyes, still a shade too pale for Julius' taste, tell the spirit user his speech is finally reaching him.
Ferris opens his mouth, but he closes it before saying a single thing.
Julius is about to continue when his friend interrupts him, "But he didn't," Ferris mutters darkly, "he ordered Ferris to continue on his own instead." Julius' eyes widen at his friend's words. To think Fourier had already expected Ferris' feelings…
"The fact he did so is enough to prove my words are true," Julius moves slowly towards the wounded healer and puts a hand on his shoulder, "he wanted you to thrive: to not be held back by what happened to him and his family," he adds with a soft, regretful smile.
"…that's the one final proof that his Highness Fourier loved you, and that had he survived his illness, he would have wanted to keep you as his knight forever," Julius finishes.
Ferris stiffens. For a moment, it almost looks as if reality froze for the demi-human. "…Julius truly believes so," the younger knight says, eyes shining with a strange glint as he speaks. And his voice, dull yet full of hope, cracks with every word he whispers. "Fourier said he wanted Ferris to myove on, but if he had had the chance… he would have stayed with Ferris, wouldn't he?" His friend looks taken aback, but Julius has no idea what he's thinking.
Julius guesses it must be the mist talking, because he is pretty sure Ferris already knew how much Fourier cared about him. "Of course, you should never doubt that," Julius affirms, slightly confused by Ferris' sudden change of demeanor.
Ferris once again doesn't answer, but it finally looks like he calmed down. He now looks conflicted, but fairly relaxed. Nonetheless, Julius hesitates before letting the matter drop: something in his friend's tone had unnerved the Spirit Knight.
Julius opens his mouth, but he closes it only seconds later, no word spoken. He thinks Ferris would rather sort his feelings out in silence than continue an uncomfortable conversation. There still are a lot of things Julius wants to say, but he doesn't know how. What Julius does know, is that he is not going to leave his friend alone anytime soon.
Ferris appreciates the peace, too, but for a complete different reason: a vile, potentially traitorous plan is forming inside his mind.
But Julius doesn't need to know that, he doesn't need to know that at all.
Is it even "Ayamatsu" if Ferris doesn't try to kill Julius at least once?
Some things i want to say before we proceed:
1) Crusch was absolutely killed by the White Whale. Fourier is unsure because he doesn't think a mabeast could be capable of erasing people. They are all theories though, he has no idea what really happened.
But we do and we know Crusch and Wilhelm were both 100% erased by the whale. Someone asked about it in the comments so I wanted to make it clearer here.
2) this chapter was supposed to be way (waaaay) longer, but i decided to cut it in half because 10k-words-chapters aren't one of my many talents.
3) Ferris' short sword is actually Canon and was gifted by Crusch, but Julius now thinks it belonged to Meckart.
...In fact, Ferris backstory was completely changed, that's why I'm making Julius talk so much about it...
4) in Ayamatsu, Ferris kills Julius because his master, who """ works""" for his Highness wanted him dead. Knowing PrideIf!Ferris only cares about Fourier, i imagine he would hate the Royal Election. There is no Crusch as a candidate. Only a merchant from Kararagi, a childish half elf and a Vollachian princess.
"What an insult to Fourier's memory! They are totally unworthy!"
—Ferris, probably.
(Yes, i do know Tappei said Felt and Reinhard met in Ayamatsu, but he never specified when.)
5) The captain of the Royal Knights was Wilhelm, not Theresia. This was also changed, due to his erasure.
Thanks for reading!