Hi guys, I know it's been a while, I kinda just go through phases. This chapter is a little bit of a filler but does have some nice domestic EO. Next one will be pretty angsty. I hope you enjoy and love to hear what you think.
As usual, mistakes are my own but otherwise I own nothing.
Also, find me of twitter MR_proud_stan
The sun is streaming through her bedroom window. It's a rare occasion when the sun rises before her. She's never been a good sleeper. Up at all times of the night when they caught a case and when Noah was a baby, it didn't exactly improve. She is used to getting up when it is still dark. The city still asleep. She gets ready for work, gets Noah ready for school.
She relishes those times with her son. The sleepy breakfast table conversations, generally recapping the previous day because, in all likelihood she might have gotten home after his bedtime the night before. She loves the thrill of an all to regular manhunt for his missing shoe or his homework. She loves the morning. There is almost something sad about missing them today.
She rolls over onto her side and sees Elliot lying beside her. He is still asleep, the sun reflecting off of his bald head. He decided to stay dressed after their middle-of-the-night walk. Nothing else was said on their walk home. When they walked back into her apartment, he had given her another hug, even tighter than the first one, if that was even possible. He kissed her forehead and turned to return to the couch.
She knew he mustn't be very comfortable; the couch was small and definitely not designed to be slept in. She knew that from first-hand experience. There had been many times, before Noah, when she had fallen asleep on it herself. The exhaustion of the day just knocking her off her feet. She always regretted in the next day.
"Elliot" she croaked out, surprised by the weakness in her voice. "Come and sleep in the bed, the couch will kill you in the morning".
He look at her, with apprehension painted on his face. He knew his back would be thankful, the few hours he had slept on the couch were not exactly the most comfortable. But he also knew that she was vulnerable. He wanted to be near her, but he didn't want her to feel uncomfortable. He eventually decided, that if Liv didn't want him with her, she would never have asked.
"You sure?" he questioned.
She nodded and led him down her hallway and into her room. She didn't bother turning the light on, the light come in from the street would be enough for them to find their way. She made her way to her side of the bed, the one closest to the door. She points Elliot to the other side as she pulled back the covers.
They had both taken their coats, scarfs and beanies off at the door. At the bed, they both toe off their shoes and she takes off her sweatshirt, leaver her in just a plain black singlet and some grey sweatpants.
When they went for their walk, Elliot hadn't gotten fully re-dressed so he was just in his suit pants and an un-tucked dress shirt. He probably could have taken his shirt off to sleep, because he as well, was wearing a singlet underneath but, he decided against it. They were already crossing one line tonight and he didn't want to screw anything up.
She lies there for a few minutes, staring at him. The sun is flooding her room now and she wonders what time it is. It's her Saturday off so she doesn't need to head into the office, but she still has things to do. She needs to go grocery shopping, do a bit of house cleaning and she desperately wants to fit in a solid workout.
With her schedule the way it was, she was rarely able to hit the gym, but it always seemed to help her, especially after an anxiety inducing week, like the one just gone.
She is feeling a bit better today. Telling Elliot about both Burton and Lewis in one night had been exhausting but it had also been oddly cathartic. He hadn't made it about himself. He hadn't told her that he would've killed them, he hadn't punched a wall, he hadn't bombarded her with apologies. He had just listened, which is exactly what she needed him to do.
Looking over Elliot's shoulder, she can see the clock on his nightstand reads 8:56. Gosh, she hasn't slept until nine in years. Its time to get up.
She doesn't want to wake Elliot, so she slowly slips out of bed and heads to the shower. After showering, she takes the time to blow dry her hair and also applies some light make-up. It adds a layer of protection, not from anything in particular, but is gives her some confidence. Today, it also helps her hide the bruise on her face.
On her way to the bathroom, she had grabbed some jeans, a comfortable bra and a black and orange floral top. One of her favourites. When she is dressed, she ventures back into her bedroom. Elliot is no longer sleeping in her bed.
For a split second she is terrified that he is gone. Maybe he was never there. He left her. Maybe he never came back.
Before her mind can spiral too much, she hears some pots clanging in the kitchen. She walks down the short hallway, hears something sizzling and her coffee maker going. When she rounds the corner, she sees him in her kitchen, barefoot, standing over her stove. A part of her couldn't help but silently laugh at the whole scene.
When he noticed her, he had to do a double take. She was goddamn beautiful, and his jaw literally dropped open. She was also barefoot; her toenails painted a dark shade of navy blue. Her jeans were light-coloured and form fitting. His eyes trailed up her long legs, quickly sliding over her hips, so as to not seem too indecent. Her top is a little loose, with the sleeves flowing by her sides. The neckline is a perfect V, showing just the right amount of cleavage whilst still remaining perfectly respectable. Her hair lacked the usual curl, but still had a soft kink at the end. She had some light lipstick on and mascara on her eyes, but no eye liner. The bruise on her cheek was still visible but certainly didn't detract from her perfection.
He didn't know how long he had been staring, but he was brought out of his trance when the coffee machine beeped.
"Morning" he finally spit out while he turned to fill the two cups, he'd gotten out earlier with coffee.
"Morning" she replied, blushing, his staring having no gone unnoticed.
"Making breakfast. Still like bacon and eggs?" he asks, handing her a cup of coffee.
"Yea, I do" she says, a smile gracing her face. She walks around the kitchen bench, sitting on a stool opposite him. She sits for a moment, sipping her coffee, while he finishes cooking, plating up the food and comes around the bench to sit in the stool beside her.
"How are you feeling this morning?" he asks casually, before taking a bite of his eggs. He doesn't want her to feel like she has to talk. They do need to talk about everything at some point, but he doesn't know if she stills vulnerable or anxious or exhausted. He needs her to be alright before they can talk about things.
"Much better…" she puts her fork down and turns to face him, her hand landing on his forearm. "Elliot…" a few tears appearing in her eye "I'm happy you came over. Last night was good for me. For us. You have always been a source of strength for me and you just… just listening to me really helped. I know we still have a way to go but… thank you" a single tear slid down her face and she quickly wiped it away. A happy tear, she thought.
He pulled her into an embrace, an attempt to hide the tears that were threatening him. "I'm so happy to be here Liv, for you. I know I fucked up; I wasn't here when you needed me. But I'm never leaving again, and I will be here for whatever you need. I love you" he whispered that last part into her hair, not sure if she would here it.
Pulling back from the hug, they had both instinctively moved closer, their thighs touching. They finished their breakfast in relative silence before Elliot moved to clear the plates.
"Do you want me to stay today?" he offers, still not 100% sure if she is okay.
"I'm actually doing pretty good today. You go home Elliot, see your kids. Shave that thing off"
She's smirking now, definitely a good sign. He knows he needs to shave, finally get rid of the last remnants of Eddie Wanger. He also knows he needs to see his kids. But, the thing he needs more than anything else is for her to be okay.
"Are you sure, because I can stay, I have this weekend off".
"I'm sure" she says with a chuckle. "I have a busy day planned. Shopping. Cleaning. Loads of fun things."
She rounds the bench, to where he is washing the dishes in her sink. She puts he coffee cup in the sink and leans on the bench beside him.
"You, cleaning… really?" he asks, a teasing grin on his face.
"I know, who would've thought" she quips, remembering the chaos that used to define her living room in the early days.
They stand there for a while, reminiscing about old times and old habits. He finishes cleaning the kitchen whilst she puts the sheets away from the couch. They talk a little more, about his kids, her work.
Just when he is getting ready to leave, they have another moment. Another hug. More "thank you's" and "I'm sorry's". She says she will call and then they part. There eyes having a conversation for themselves. The love, the pain, the gratitude, all shared.
He walks out her door and quietly finds his way back down to his car, parked around the corner. As soon as he gets in and closes the door, he slams his hands on the wheel. He had been able to restrain himself with her. He knew she didn't need his rage and his guilt but that doesn't mean its not there. He hates these men. Lewis and Lowe. He is furious that he didn't protect her, not then and not now. He needs to do something about it. He needs to help her.
He knows that Lowe is intent on using his trial to humiliate her and he can't let that happen. He won't let that happen. Having, resolved to do something about it, Elliot quickly heads home to shower, change and kiss his mother and son, before setting off for the drive up to Rikers. He was in the mood for a little chat.