How I Met Your Mother- "Of Course…Michael…"
Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended
Summary: There was a little more to the "Of Course" episode as Mr. and Mrs. Scherbatsky-Stinson relate after a chance meeting.
Part IX…
2019, Maclarens'…
"'First Try'?" Tracy asked. Ted, for his part rather stunned.
Come on, Anita Appleby, even on two-thirds impulse…In pursuit of…He pictured what he remembered of Michael…Middle-aged, slouchy, overweight, casual to the max…And forever on either Robin's, Anita's…Even…
What's-her-name? The vapid blonde whom I happily dated to rebuild my ego till I realized I wasn't into seven-year-olds? Anti-Karen, Marshall used to call her…
Right, Becky. The one at Fox now handling foreign affairs…
…Hook
God, didn't Robin say she was once up for a job in the White House a year or so ago as a "foreign policy advisor". I remember she couldn't tell Argentina from Brazil on a map.
Then again, doesn't my old thing from elitist hell Karen work under her now as an assistant, Robin said?
He was on the hook to them all at different, and I think, the same times, briefly…Yet…
Oh, she must have reverted to 'extreme just Anita' in the cab or something…
"Yeah…" Anita sighed. "But let Barney continue, it still hurts to tell it…" sigh. "Though it makes me so proud…" beam.
Ted eyeing Tracy…Robin eyeing them, then Barney.
That bad? She noted telepathically to husbro.
That…Bad…Telepathic return. Telepathic high-five, mutual nods.
"Honey?" Barney, stunned at her sudden weeping…
"Oh, we are so in synch…" Robin sobbed.
…
Metro News 1…2010…
"So, are you going to call Robin, Barney?" Patrice, seated in her chair, Barney perched on her desk, munching his third cookie.
"What? Why? Uh, did she say…? I mean…No, certainly not. Unless she asked that I did, as a friend, I mean…Did she?"
"Oh, no. I just think you should." Patrice beamed.
"Really? What? No…" attempt at casual… "Patrice, she's with Don…I'm with whomever my next conquest among the busty dullards should happen to be…It's fine. Though, of course, if she asked that I call her…As a friend…" eyeing Patrice narrowly, shrewd nod. "I naturally, as a friend…" he stopped as a low moan came from the door…
"What the…?"
"Oh, my…" Patrice rose, anxious look. "That doesn't sound good."
Door opening…Anita in her glasses, looking bedraggled, yet still quite smokin'…Heels in hand…
"Good God…" Barney stared. "Anita? What happened?"
"He said…Nooooooo…." She moaned, weeping… "Oh, God…" dropping head into hands.
"I was so proud of him." She looked up, wan smile. "That bitch has lost him for good."
"Oh, Anita…" Patrice sighed, going to her, offering hug.
"Dear…" Barney stared at the two… "'That bitch' is you."
"I…" sob… "Know…" sob… "But it was so great to see him brush her off." Frown. "I knew I should have gone with the tweed." Shaking head.
"What did he say?" Patrice, shaking head.
"Well…" Anita, dabbing at eyes… "Damn this stupid mascara, why does any sane women wear such crapola?"
Barney sighing, shaking head. "This is my fault. I went too far and killed playa Anita."
"No…" Anita frowned. "I was full on…Well, with the glasses I was a little tentative, but smokin' still."
"Uh-huh." He eyed her.
"Barney." Patrice, reprovingly.
"No, it's ok." Anita shrugged. "Look. I took a picture on his doorstep but I couldn't send it to you. Signal was terrible." She held camera. "I had the glasses off, in my purse, like you suggested…"
Hmmn…Barney eyed the quite reasonably hot image of Anita, though somewhat lessened for effect by the hopeful smile on a face oddly innocently yearning.
Oh, God…Now I wanna cry myself…He stared. How could he have turned her down, relentlessly unforgiving bastard?
"So, what happened? He refuse to see you?" Barney stared at her.
"Oh, no…" annoyed tone. "Michael is always polite. He'd never be rude like that." Anita beamed.
"But…Ooooh…." Weeping. "He opened the door, told me he really couldn't talk to me now, and…Hoped…I'd…Be…Ok…No…Hard…" sob…
"Oh, sweetheart." Patrice hugged her.
"And you just gave up?" Barney frowned.
"Certainly not." Anita, a bit miffed. "I begged him to let me in…"
"'Begged'?" Barney stared.
("Begged?" Ted stared.
"Believe me I'd've torn out my heart and offered it on a platter if I'd thought that would make him believe in me." Anita, firmly.)
"He said…" sobbing… "He was grateful I'd…" ooohhh…. "…let him spend some time…Oh, that miserable, vicious bitch!...With him…" weeping.
"But he felt it was best for him…And me…Oh, God…" sobbing.
Barney sighing, rolling eyes. Patrice patting Anita on shoulder, Anita embracing her.
"I stood in front of his door, I begged him to open again…" Anita, between sobs.
"And then you left?" Barney frowned.
"Certainly not. He opened the door like the wonderfully kind man he is, told me he was flattered I'd gone to such trouble…And then explained he had to go see his daughter. And he hoped I'd be ok and again, no…Ooooh…" head burying into Patrice's shoulder.
"Napoleon at Waterloo…Michael the Duke of Wellington, resisting your charge…And his daughter the Prussians…" Barney shook head.
"No." Patrice firmly. "If we're going to use military analogies, this is Grant in the Wilderness. Anita?" she pulled the woman's tear-stained face up. "You lost the first round, but you're going to keep on marching toward Richmond. You're gonna fight on this line if it takes all summer, heck all year." Firm tone.
"Patrice?" Barney stared.
"I love puppies, warm milk, helping people feel better, Robin, Robin and you…" sly beam… "And History." Patrice noted. "I'm in News, Barney, it's not that strange. Plus, my second major in college was History."
"You're right, Patrice." Anita, firmly now, wiping eyes…Damn this mascara!
"If I love this man and God, I do, I gotta fight for him. He deserves to be fought for. And my doctoral skills are telling me that's the way to prove myself. He's testing me…And damn it, I'm up to the challenge." Determined look.
("I don't quite remember it that way…" Barney noted. "I think you just said you wouldn't give up…")
"I shall fight. I shall fight on the sidewalk and here in Metro News 1…Can you get me an interview spot, Patrice? When my honey's working, of course… I shall fight in his favorite restaurants and at his favorite bars and his favorite sporting events. I shall never…Surrender." Anita, grimly.
"Yay!" Patrice clapped. "Though just a bit creepy, stalkingwise." She noted.
"Well, you get the point…" Anita shrugged.
"Wow." Barney blinked. "As Patrice says, a tad creepy but impressive."
"And you mustn't surrender either, Barney." Anita, eyeing him carefully.
"Field Marshall Robin crushed me at the beaches, Anita. That's over." He shook head. "It's fine, we negotiated a friendly armistice. Let's focus on your campaign, shall we?"
"Fine…But, despite all my Churchillian rhetoric…" Anita sighed. "What do I do now? Playa Anita's attack's been routed."
"Well, if you really mean to carry on this campaign…" Barney, sternly. "We'll need to put our heads together, regroup, and find a new place to make your stand. I think I need to call in additional support…Just a minute." He pulled cell and stepped away.
"Yo, Marshall. Is Lily available?" he told phone.
Five dollars says World War II-Robin/Barney breaks out in three months, Patrice hissed to Anita.
I'll say two to make it interesting…Anita nodded.
…