small references from the last episode :)
He has her facing him with the stream of warm water running down her head. Her eyes are closed rinsing the shampoo out of her hair as his hands washes her body. This side of Elliot she is finally able to see. So intimate and nurturing. He takes his time washing her body and she fights herself internally trying to avoid it becoming sexual or she'll never let him leave her shower.
His fingers press into every muscle he moves across. He's lathering up her body and when her eyes open she does the same to his. She pulls him underneath the stream with her getting the soap off of the both of them. Her fingers lock behind his neck as she brings his lips down to hers.
After they showered it is her that stops him from laying her out on the bed again. If she didn't them showering together would have been a waste of time. She hides her self in her bathroom before she caves into him as they both got dressed. She gave him some NYPD sweats she had that thankfully fitted. They made their way back to her kitchen. He turned on the coffee pot and grabbed two mugs from her cupboard.
"You remembered." She said referring to her coffee and how she liked it as she held the mug close to her mouth.
"Some things don't change, Liv."
"Mmm, some."
He looks past the damp waves that hover over her face. The change in her demeanor is obvious because he knows her so well and they are still able to read each other. Her eyes remained staring into the hot cup of coffee, her finger tapping the glass repeatedly. She can't be regretting what they did but he knows they still have so much to work through.
"You okay?" He asks her.
Her "I'm fine" act won't work on him, she knows that so she doesn't even try it. They need to talk to find the balance in their relationship.
She looks at him with her head tilted to side. "Umm yeah, we just have so much to talk about El."
"I know."
He helps her out of the bar stool and moves them to her sofa.
"Where do you want to start?" He asks her because he knows she'll be doing most of the questioning.
"The letter. Why did you give it to me?" She said blankly. It made it hard for him to read any emotion from her.
"You knew you loved me, but still gave me the letter."
From the night he disclosed that Kathy made him write the letter, questioning why he gave it to her was always on her mind.
"Liv, I didn't even want to give it to you. I felt like I had to after..after she died. She wanted me to."
A part of him believed that It may have helped him get over her. Stop her from loving him because he didn't want to see her hurt. Possibly move on from whatever their relationship was.
She doesn't call bullshit on his response. Consciously or unconsciously he may have thought it was his last chance to do something for his wife after she died. Something she wanted him to do and maybe she just has to respect that. Just what about how it has affected her.
Kathy trusted her husband yet her worry was constant during their partnership. They were too close. So in tune with each other she thought one day she might just lose him.
She and Olivia grew to be good friends but the thought never seemed to leave her mind. Even in Rome it was hard to believe that they didn't keep in contact with one another.
Yet her reasons were valid. Olivia knew things about him that he would never bring up to her.
She brings the mug up to her face for another drink. "Hmm I guess it's still hard to believe after all those years she couldn't trust me completely."
"Don't do that Liv, everyone knew that we would choose each other over the job."
He was right about that. It's what almost caused them their partnership.
"And what about Wheatley's wife. From what I've heard she seems very fond of you." She downs more of her coffee hoping she can wash away the bitterness in her voice.
This he wishes he doesn't have to tell her. He regrets getting involved and having some commonness with her even if it was grief. He knows it all could have been avoided if he had just started therapy when she told him to. Undoubtedly, she was right. She knew what he needed and it was time with his family away from Kathy's case and rest. She needed him to get himself together not only for him and his family but for her as well.
"I kissed her in a moment of weakness. I wanted to feel something other than the pain but I didn't let it transpire any further. I left."
"And your other friend, flutura."
However you pronounce her name. She whispered under her breath.
At first he wasn't sure that he should even tell her. But she seems persistent in knowing what happened. The last thing he wants to do is tell her the stupid things he did that could affect their relationship.
"We did…" he started after seconds of silence. "I tried to avoid it happening the first time…."
"The first time. Wow." She said cutting him off looking away from him completely.
He continued so he can some what, if he can save himself.
"I crushed a sleeping pill and put it in her drink which I regret because it was still wrong. But I did it so I didn't have to then left. But a week later she showed up to my trailer. If I didn't she would've known something was up Olivia."
She's quiet, he can almost clearly see the wheels turning in her head. Confused about so many things. Hurt for sure. She has dealt with this all before. With Cassidy being under cover. Her having to hear what went down. Literally. It's one reason she try's to avoid undercover operations. Deep down also why she pushed for him to finally come home.
"What I don't understand Elliot is why not me?" It seems like he never picks her.
"I was always here, there waiting for you. If you needed someone why didn't you choose me. You knew how I felt even if I didn't say it. You said you loved me." She said through the cracks in her voice. The hurt residing there.
She feels the burning in her eyes as they brim with tears.
" I still do Olivia. I am so sorry the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you."
He wipes the tears from her eyes then pulls her into his chest. He lays back against the arm of the sofa with his arms around her.
"I'm not mad El. I just needed to talk and let you know how I felt."
"You have every right to." He replied to her. "Mind if I ask you a question?"
She whispers no with her laying on his chest.
"Fin told me you meet someone and it was pretty solid. What happened?"
He has already told her everything with all honesty, she thinks it's only fair she answers his only question.
"Yeah uh Ed died. We broke up more than three years ago before he died because I wasn't ready to retire."
Three years? How has this woman stayed single so long. He would have jumped at any chance to be with her.
"I'm sorry, Liv"
"It's okay, Tucker was a good guy."
It takes him a minute to make sure he heard her correctly.
"Tucker? IAB Tucker?"
"Yes Elliot, why does everyone find that so hard to believe."
"Probably because he was out for all of our jobs. Especially us two."
She lets out a small laugh before she says "Well he was really a good person when he wasn't coming for jobs. He treated me well."
"Hmm, that's good I guess." He said sounding a bit jealous making her hush him. "Were you happy?"
Is he serious?
"I was but later on I just knew it wasn't going to last."
"Tired?" He asks her when her arm wrap around his torso and she yawns.
"Mhmm and you're comfortable." She says eliciting a laugh from him.
"I'll order lunch when we wake up." He tells her.
"Coffee didn't work?" He said when she yawned again.
"It never does." She said closing her eyes.
"Food's here!" He yelled out to her from her living from.
The food was already shared out by the time she comes out of her room. He carried her to the bedroom a little while after she fell asleep. The sofa was not working with his back and he wanted to make sure she was comfortable. She woke some time after then he order their food.
She knocks her food around on her plate before she ask "How are your Kids."
The last time she saw all of them together was for Kathy's funeral. It was shocking to her how grown they've gotten. The last time she was Eli were under not so good circumstances.
"Eli and I are still figuring it out regardless they're all good. They're actually coming next week for a Christmas get together. They will love to see you Liv. You and Noah."
Her heart flutters at the thought of spending Christmas with his family. It has always been her and Noah. She enjoyed nothing more than celebrating and spending time and the holidays with her son. To be with his family this time isn't like when she came as his partner. They're a different kind of partners now. It has her thinking how are they going to tell his kids. How is she going to tell Noah. She leaves that thought alone for another day.
"Elliot are sure, it might be to soon."
She stops when he gives her that no non-sense look.
He bites his lip and looks her up and down.
"Just come."
She doesn't know how to take that. He knows what he's doing. She doesn't hide the smile on her face.
"We'll be there." She says with an even bigger smile.
"Good and don't worry about anything."
"I don't think I'm ready for you to go yet." She says tangled in to him on her bed.
Their fingers are interlocked over their bodies. Her head is laying on his upper arm and his fingers are playing with her hair
"I don't want to."
She lets out a breath. The thought of having to sleep alone bothers her. She's never going to sleep as good when he is not around.
"I have to pick up Noah in a couple hours. Your mom and Eli probably think I've taken you hostage."
He laughs "They actually don't know where I am. Mama may have a clue her heads always going there but they may think I'm still out working."
He doubts her confusing Olivia for is wife was accidental, the thought must have been playing in her mind.
His finger rake through her hair tucking it behind her ear. He'll never get over how beautiful the woman in the front of him is. There is an intersperse of freckles under her eyes and across her cheeks. More than he has remembered her having. Along with other places he has gotten to see. He's finally with the love of his life.
"I love you." He said holding his gaze to her.
" I love you too Elliot, so much." She feels she is able to say it as freely as she wants to.