"Let me get this straight," the woman at Bishop Security says. "So you want to find a 'Peter Parker' who got his daily cup of joe from your bakery and then stopped showing up because you publicly berated him for ogling at you and now you want to apologize because you feel awful about it. Is that right?"
"Wow, you're really great at this stuff," Michelle remarks. She is about to add further if not for Ned's constant nudging and elbowing. Fine. She'll keep mum. This was his idea anyway.
"Can you help us?" he asks politely.
The bespectacled blond hag sneers. "Read the sign behind me and tell me what you think we are."
Bitch-Stop-Security, Michelle is badly tempted to yell reading the stylized lettering of the company name but manages to refrain herself.
"I'll tell you exactly what we are. We are security contractors, and if we're to help teens like you play hide-and-seek, half of New York would be lining outside and we'd no doubt be making millions."
Michelle springs off her seat. "Then it's a tragedy you haven't already."
She hurries through the rest of the floor, occasionally bumping into someone or the other, and darts towards the elevators, not paying heed to the dark haired woman pleading with her to stay.
"Stupid idea," she exclaims outside. "Security company, really? What do you have next in mind, the National Guard?"
Ned has to race to keep up with her. "No, but don't blame me, I've been trying my best even though it's not my-"
"It's not your what?" MJ stops walking, Ned following suit. "Problem? Because I know this is my mess and I'm sorry for dragging you along. You can go if you want."
"MJ," his voice is gentle but unapologetic, "if he doesn't show up, maybe he doesn't want to. Look. You made a mistake, we all do. But you've got to stop doing this to yourself. This isn't you! There are a dozen important things right now and finding this guy isn't one of them. Who knows, we may bump into him when we're least expecting."
Over the span of the following weeks life is an endless blur of school, assessments, making financial arrangements for college and serving coffee to strangers. The fine line that separates one from the other fades and Michelle often finds herself doing things at the wrong time of the day.
"Go home Jones. You can't get a raise working overtime."
"I don't need a raise. Just like it here."
She spends the rest of her time with books, although her mind keeps wandering and she ends up looking blankly at the wall or at the night outside before taking to bed.
Sleep isn't easy but when it gets hold of her, a familiar face smiles when she hands him coffee. "Dude!' he walks towards Ned at the back of the bus, wearing a yellow blazer like the rest of them. "Nice to have you back," Liz beams at him from the front of the bus as she shuffles through her questionnaire. "Thanks," he smiles back and MJ is green with envy. "It's good to be back." For some unknown cause the team feels complete. Even Mr. Harrington, who has seemed so despondent lately, looks cheery. But Michelle knows time isn't on her side. "I'm sorry," she begins, approaching him. "I shouldn't have-"
Her eyes snap open and she's back in her room where there is no Peter Parker. She turns to her side and pulls up the blanket to cover her head because the sound of the clock is deafening. For the last time she thinks of his dejected face. The dejected face that she created.
Ten minutes later the early morning alarm goes off.
"You look sick," Sasha says nonchalantly at the bakery. "Thin like a stick."
MJ responds with a smile; she doesn't have the strength nor the patience to explain that she's unable to even look at food, that water is the only thing passable through her throat. Anything solid reminds her of stretchy rubber or leather. Sometimes she finds a plate of scones or an overbaked cake on her table which peacefully witnesses both sunrise and sunset until her father comes and takes it away.
"You do look like you've lost some serious pounds," Ned remarks.
"Anything else? I'm done hearing this."
"Okay," Ned rubs his chin in thought. "You got the Iron Man Scholarship? I did. Results were out yesterday."
"Yeah." She slowly pulls out a chair opposite him, her face crestfallen. "I can't go to MIT Ned."
Ned coughs. "Why?"
"Because I only won a half scholarship," she says and tries to manage a smile. "Maybe Empire State University. It's much more affordable, though I still have to pay."
"But you said your folks could afford sending you to MIT!"
"They can," she replies with a sigh. "But I don't want them to. I hate going home. This is sad but I hate how my parents are. Sometimes I want to move away, if I could. I don't wanna hate them and feed off them at the same time. I wish they never met! They don't understand each other. Only pity themselves. My house is a literal hellhole. So what does it make me, attending college when it's paid by the people I can't stand? Makes me feel miserable, baseless, shameless. Like I don't already."
###
The rest of the days pass uneventfully and MJ loses track of time. She distances herself and keeps away from most people at school, even avoiding meeting eyes with her teachers. Until one day, when Jason Ionello announces the sightings of Spider-Man's return over the morning episode of Midtown News."
"… on a dumpster in an alley," he cries over Betty Brant's voice, "his costume was apparently torn in places like he was mauled. By claws..."
Silence befalls at the Wall-Crawler's name, bringing everyone to a standstill. Ned waves at MJ from across the hall and shoves his way towards her.
It isn't until seconds later that she realizes she's been clutching and pulling at her necklace.
"Remember folks," Ionello continues, "this comes just after the fact that Spidey's been missing for weeks!"
Then Flash Thompson barges in and Michelle's blood begins to boil at once. "Of course this is not good," he is boastfully loud, his face a torch of excitement. "I mean who thought this was possible, right?"
"Come on," Michelle whispers to Ned and turns to leave.
"The last I heard of him he was near the Rockefeller Center", Flash informs. "MJ, Ned, will you sing a 'welcome-back' song for our Spidey?"
"No Flash," Ned retorts. "We're leaving that to you since you're good 'friends' with him."
But Flash is already on Michelle's trail, his hand on her shoulder.
"I was thinking we should-"
Michelle swiftly turns around, grabs hold of his collar and hauls him towards the lockers. Flash hits with a metallic thud.
"- get pictures… MJ what-?"
"It's Michelle," she snaps. She wants to scream. Her fists are clenched and ache to punch him in the face. If it wasn't for him, Peter Parker would still be around. She'd have a full scholarship to college. "I've had enough of your shit. It's all your fault. If you hadn't bailed that day Decathlon would still be a thing here. We could've won!"
"Me?" Flash shouts. "Oh please, I never bailed. I left for an appointment after telling the goddamn Principal! Heck, I even tried telling you but you never even heeded! But wait a sec." He forces a chuckle. "This has got to do with you being unable to pay for MIT, right?"
###
"You shouldn't have done that," Ned says later at the bakery. "You can't stand all of Flash's nonsense which is relatable, but maybe try not attacking him next time? It wasn't really a very smart move."
"I didn't attack him, just pushed him," MJ corrects.
Ned shrugs, taking a bite off his donut. "Yeah, but now he'll taunt you every chance he gets."
"I don't care."
"Seriously? You just said that? What's happened? You're not being yourself right now!"
"So you keep saying Ned, but what do you mean by that?"
He sighs. "I know you've been annoyed lately and probably even hate yourself. But you're letting emotions get the better of you, and you just make everything about Peter Parker and how you behaved with him that day. Just stop already! I keep telling you, and I'm telling you again. This is your life. Your story. So stop making it about him. Gosh, I sound so campy!"
A lengthy silence ensues, with Ned picking at his half-eaten donut and MJ playing with a damp wipe. The clock goes from a half past five in the evening to a quarter to six.
"It's going to stay Ned. This is going to stay, and I don't think I'll ever be able to forget it."
He shakes his head. "No. No, you'll be fine. Trust me."
She looks out the glass double-doors one last time.
Graduation eventually arrives, and everyone's wearing caps and gowns and sitting with their families listening to the Principal and various other dignitaries speak. Ned brings his grandmother as well, and Michelle's with her parents.
Flash is Valedictorian to everybody's astonishment and he gives a grateful speech about perseverance and hope. Michelle's surprised at his turn of character because everyone's listening closely, but then he slowly transitions into making every word about himself and she can't help but smile.
When she leaves her seat for her certificate she doesn't return. Instead, she walks into the school for probably the last time. It's strangely quiet inside. She goes to the rooftop where she and Ned enjoyed the world without the noise, and the cafeteria where she mostly sat alone during breaks. In the detention room she drew caricatures of the defaulters.
Lastly she walks into the gym, where she went to Homecoming all by herself because no one asked her out, and where she ended up roaming around like a ghost.
There's someone inside.
"Oh MJ, it's you," Betty says when MJ finds her by the gallery. There's relief in her voice. "Hell of a circus out there."
"Yeah," MJ smiles. "Realized this whole thing's a joke when they made Flash Valedictorian."
Betty chuckles. "Yeah, there's that."
"What are you doing here?"
Betty wearily looks about herself before her gaze shifts back to MJ. "I can't leave because I'm with my folks, and Jason's been trying to confess his feelings to me but I don't feel the same."
A noise from behind startles them. Michelle turns around to look, expecting to see Ionello but it's only Ned standing at the door.
"I saw you come here," he says, when his gaze falls upon Betty. "Hi."
"Hello," Betty winces.
"You look good."
"Thanks. You too." Betty stares at her feet for a whole minute and then her head shoots up at MJ. "You know I've been meaning to tell you but I always forget. I like your necklace."
"Oh? Thanks. It's a Black Dahlia. It's really special."
"That's a flower?"
"Yeah, I mean it was a flower. It broke. It broke but I like it this way."
Ned shuffles his feet. "You'll be here in New York?"
Betty nods. "Got a paid offer from the Bugle. MJ, you're attending ESU right?"
"Actually," she says, smiling sideways at Ned, "I've been thinking of going to MIT, so that I don't regret it later."
Ned engulfs her in a hug.
###
Michelle keeps working at the shop till the last day before she leaves New York. She still stays an extra hour or so and occasionally looks out the window. On the streets she tries to search for the presence that she used to feel watching over her. She keeps looking over her shoulders but there's nothing. She makes better friends with her co-worker, Sasha, and they leave the shop together once their shift ends.
"That's a nice necklace," Sasha says one day, and reaches out to examine it with her hand. "But why does it look broken?"
MJ jerks away from her.
"Uh, she's a little protective about that," Ned says, coming to her aid. "Doesn't let anyone touch it."
"Ouh I had no idea," Sasha says, a little taken aback. "I had no idea."
"I'm sorry I hope you don't mind," MJ says as she tucks the glass pendant underneath her shirt. "It's just that it's really precious to me."
A/N: Perhaps I've been writing too much Spider-Man lately. One day a house-hold spider came up to me on my chair and kept returning even though I swiped it away with my pen.
That said, the second chapter was actually supposed to be longer, but as I kept writing and writing and writing, taking more and more time, I was never happy the way it turned out and it became very lengthy. So I split it into two. This is the first half.
I'll be uploading the next one soon. If you've liked this story I'd be happy to read a review from you, because honestly speaking, it's a huge motivation even though I am an aspiring writer and shouldn't always keep depending on reviews for motivation. And thanks everyone for all the follows, favorites and your comments!
See you all soon.