Chapter 14

"Jackson…" Michaela reached out to touch his face, but he backed away. Again, she looked in his eyes. Something…something was different about him, but she didn't know what it was. "Jackson…how…what…what are you doing here?"

"I've come to see you." He moved around the headstone.

"But you're…you're dead!" Her eyes widened.

"Come here," he beckoned.

"Jackson I-"

"Come here," he said, moving closer.

"Jackson, there's something different about-"

"Come here." He pulled her close and brought her lips close to his, wrapping her in a possessive kiss.

Quickly, she pulled away from his icy lips. "Jackson…"

Jackson held tightly onto her arms. "Don't move."

"Jackson, please let go-"

"It should have been you too, Michaela!" He shook her. "It should have been you, too!"

"Jackson stop! Please!" She tried to wiggle out of his grasp. "You're hurting me!"

"You're hurting me!" he repeated back to her, his eyes turning even darker.

"Jackson, what's wrong with you? Why are you doing this?" She continued to struggle.

Suddenly, he brought his face mere inches from hers and stared into her eyes.

Michaela froze suddenly, transfixed in his gaze. She watched as his eyes turned black. He moved closer to her, brushing his cheek against hers, whispering in her ear. "Yet, we'll never be apart…"

"Jackson, stop it! I don't-"

"Love me?" He cocked his head to the side, pushing her away. "Then why are you still wearing my ring?"

Michaela looked down and placed her hands before her, seeing Jackson's ring on her finger. "But I-" She stopped. "Jackson?"

She looked around seeing no one. "Jackson!" She yelled again! "Jackson!"

"Michaela….Michaela…" She heard her name being called.

"Jackson…" She turned around, opening her eyes, meeting pools of blue. "Jackson?"

"Michaela, it's me."

"Sully?" she squinted. "What…what-" she breathed deeply.

"Calm down." He brushed her hair from her face. "I was in the other room with Hannah, and I heard ya screamin'."

"It was Jackson," she swallowed. "He was alive, and…and he grabbed me. He told me that it…it should have been me too…I should have been hit."

"What?" Sully gathered Michaela's face in his hands. "Michaela, no."

"It…it was so real. But…but there was something different about him." She tried to think. "Something dark."

"Somethin' different?" His eyes narrowed.

"I just don't know what it-"

"Dr. Mike?" Hannah walked in rubbing her eyes.

"Oh sweetheart, did I wake you?" she regretted. "I'm sorry."

"You otay?" she asked, pulling herself into Michaela's lap.

"I'm fine. I just had a bad dream." She swallowed. "How about you? How do you feel?" Michaela looked to Hannah's neck where she had to stitch up her tracheotomy. "Does it hurt?"

"No, hurt." She smiled, touching Michaela's cheek. "No more bad dreams." She placed her elephant next to her. "She sleep wif yah!"

"Well, thank you!" Michaela smiled, putting the elephant under the covers with her.

"Papa sleep wif me when I have bad dream," it occurred to her. "Papa sleep wif you!" She became excited.

Sully and Michaela looked at one another, both becoming extremely uncomfortable. "Ahh…sweetheart, we-" Michaela began.

"Hannah, that's not how it-"Sully interrupted.

"We can't do that sweetheart." Michaela's face turned red.

"Why's not?" The little girl didn't understand. "He makes ya feel better!"

"Your papa already made me feel better." She smiled toward Sully.

"You sweep wif Dr. Mike?" Her face lit up.

"No!" They both shouted in unison, causing Hannah to jump.

"Hannah," Sully said, trying not to laugh at the awkwardness of the situation, "Dr. Mike and me were just taking. You know how sometimes when you're scared and when we talk about it, it doesn't seem as scary afterward? It makes you feel better inside." He touched her tummy.

"Yeah…" She smiled.

"Your papa talked to me to make me feel better," Michaela summed it up.

"Good, Papa…" Hannah patted his arm.

Sully smiled back. "Come on, Hannah. Let's go back to bed. Dr. Mike needs her rest."

"I stay?" She smiled, touching Michaela's hair. "I sweep."

"No, Hannah. You need to come back to bed in your own room."

"Pwease!" Hannah pouted her little red lips and batted her lashes.

"Hannah… Dr. Mike needs it to be-"

"It's alright. She can stay with me, if it's alright with you."

"Alright, papa?" Hannah smiled wide, showing her perfect row of white teeth.

"Are you sure?" He looked to Michaela.

"It's alright." She moved over. "We'll have some girl time."

Sully exhaled. "Alright, but if she gets to be too much, just bring her back over."

"I'm sure we'll be fine." She covered both her and Hannah up.

"Good night, honey." Sully bent over and kissed Hannah on the head. Turning, he looked over at Michaela. "Ahhh…good night."

"Good night, Sully."

Michaela watched as Sully exited the room and closed the door behind him. She looked down and saw Hannah snuggling against her. "Are you warm enough?"

"Yep," she smiled. "Dr. Mike?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

Hannah twirled Michaela's hair around her fingers. "You not go away again?"

"Go away?" she questioned.

"I live wif Indians and I not see you no more?" Hannah held her hands up.

Michaela couldn't help but smile at the child's innocence. "Hannah, I'm not going anywhere, but it depends on where your papa wants to live. He likes staying with the Indians."

Hannah didn't say anything, but she continued to play with Michaela's hair.

"But if you do go back to stay with the Indians, I'd come to visit you." She smiled.

"Weally!" Hannah's eyes grew big. "Come see me?"

"Yes, sweetheart," she smiled. "I'd come see you."

"I love you, Dr. Mike." Hannah hugged her before falling asleep.

"I love you too…" Michaela kissed the child's forehead.

May 5th 1863

"What do you mean she's gone? Where'd she go?" Loren looked to Sully with astonished eyes.

"She told me she was comin' to see ya. She never came home last night." Sully bounced Hannah on his hip.

"She never came home?" Loren frowned.

"No." Sully looked around, thinking.

"Someone musta taken her!" Loren jumped thinking the worse.

"No one's taken her." Sully put his arm out calming Loren. "She's run off," he realized.

"Run off! What in tarnation are you talking about?"

Sully set Hannah down in the crib that Loren set up for her at the store. "She was getting worried that she was gonna be sent to jail. She was afraid that people were gonna be comin' after her."

Loren's brow furrowed, "I thought you were takin' care of that!"

"I was! I mean…I am!" Sully countered. "It's just that Abby's been acting real strange lately." Sully tried to remember. "She's been real distant, not wanting to hold Hannah. She just looks out the window. And last week, she was talking about going away to see her aunt in San Francisco."

"What are you talking about?" Loren was skeptic. "She don't have no aunt in Frisco."

"What!" Sully was stunned.

"What have you done to my baby?" Loren neared him.

"Loren, I'm gonna find her. She couldn't have gotten that far. I found her before. I can find her again."

"I knew I should never have let her marry you! You're nothing but trouble!"

"Loren…" Sully tried to calm him.

"If something happens to my daughter, I swear I'll never speak to ya again!"

May 1866

"How you been doin?" Sully asked Michaela, as he sat down next to her at Grace's.

"Hi," she smiled. "I've been doing good."

"Any nightmares?" He tried to look her in the eye.

Michaela exhaled. "Not really nightmares…just dreams." She was vague. "I…I remembered something last night."

"What's that?" he was interested.

"Do you remember when I told you that night I had that nightmare I thought there was something different about Jackson, but I couldn't remember what it was?"

Sully shook his head.

Michaela bit her lip, trying to come to terms with what it could mean. "His eyes, Sully, they…they were brown."

"So…" He didn't understand where she was coming from.

"Jackson has blue eyes," she stated matter-of-factly. "And I remember they were just getting darker, until…"

"Until what?" He touched her hand, trying to bring her comfort to go on.

Michaela looked down at her hand in his, and it made her a bit uncomfortable. "Sully…" She removed her hand. "His eyes, they turned black."

"Black?"

"He was so different Sully. He was mean. He was…not Jackson."

Sully sought his words, hoping they would bring solace to her. "The Cheyenne say that your eyes are the windows to your soul, and once you become one with mother earth, they turn hollow and dark, and that is when they know they've crossed over to be with the grandfathers."

"If…if that's true, then why was he so angry with me in my dreams? Why did he say-"

"Michaela, sometimes dreams are just what they are, dreams. You've been though a terrible ordeal."

Michaela shook her head in understanding.

"And I know ya been blamin' yourself," he came out with it.

"Sully, I don't-"

Sully tried to reason with her. He couldn't stand to see her going through so much inner turmoil. "Michaela don't ya see? If you don't stop blamin yourself for what happened, you're never gonna put your mind at ease. These nightmares are only gonna get worse."

Michaela pursed her lips trying to concentrate on what he was saying to her. She knew that he was right. And it definitely wasn't Jackson in her dream. "I know that, Sully, but it's not that easy to do."

Again he tried to hold her hand. "I wanna be there to help ya though this."

"Sully." Michaela place her hand over his. "I'm…I'm not ready for us. It's too soon."

"Michaela, I'm not asking for anything. I know what you're goin' through. I would never ask ya to do something your not ready for."

"Sully, I…I know where I want us to be, but I'm just not ready to go there yet." She looked down. "I wish that we could just…start over."

He didn't know where she was getting at. "Start over?"

Michaela couldn't help but laugh. "You know, like meet for the first time." She looked into his eyes before looking away. "Do things the right way."

"Well…okay then." He held out his hand. "Nice to meet you, Dr. Quinn. Name's Sully."

She took his hand and shook it, "First or last?"

"Huh?"

She giggled, "Is that your first or last name?"

"Last," he smiled.

"What's your first, then?" She tipped her head to the side and mischievous smile crossed her face.

"Michaela…" his voice deepened.

Michaela enjoyed their banter. "Did I say you could address me by my first name?" Her brow lifted.

They both burst into laughter.

"Hannah and I are going out to the reservation this afternoon. Would ya like to come with us?"

"I'd like that."

Boston

Elizabeth sat on the terrace in the back yard of her home, enjoying the warm spring day when she saw the door to the gate open.

"Mrs. Quinn," Martha neared.

"Yes…" She put her cup of tea down and looked up.

"You have a letter here from Miss Michaela, ma'am."

"Oh, splendid. Bring it here." She held out her hand. Elizabeth had been waiting weeks to hear from her daughter. She had been wondering if her and Jackson had set a date for their wedding. And she secretly hoped they would come back to Boston and have a lavish affair. Quickly she opened it.

Mother, May 17th 1867

I hope this letter finds you in good health and the rest of the family is doing as well. I'm afraid that I have awful news, and you don't know how it breaks my heart to tell you everything I have to say in a letter. There is no easy way of saying this, so I'm just going to come out with it…

"Oh no," Elizabeth though. "They've called off the wedding." She held the letter to her heart and took a deep breath before returning.

A few days ago, there was a terrible accident. I was making my way out of the church and it was raining rather heavily, for reasons I was standing in the street, and unbeknownst to me there was a run away stage scurrying through town and heading right toward me. I didn't know what was happening until I heard my name being called, and the next thing I knew, I was being pushed away from the oncoming stage. Luckily for me, Sully was able to push me and himself out of harms way. Oh mother, this is so hard to say. But, Jackson was there, and he also tried to push me out of the way, but he was hit. The impact of the stage killed him.

"Dear God!" Elizabeth closed her eyes tightly.

"What is it, ma'am?" Martha came closer. "Is Miss Michaela alright?"

"She…she…" Elizabeth couldn't finish, her eyes transfixed back to the letter

…and to make this horrendous experience that much more difficult, the stage that came though town was carrying Harold and Lillian Tate.

Elizabeth couldn't read anymore, and she placed the letter on the table next to the porcelain teacup and saucer. "I need to lie down for awhile. Could you please help me turn down the bed?"

"Of course, Mrs. Quinn." Martha eyed her. "Is everything alright with Miss Michaela?"

"Michaela's…Michaela's alright," Elizabeth closed her eyes. "Please, let's go in the house."

Looking between the slats of the gate, his green eyes followed the women, as they retreated inside the house. Ever so slowly, he pushed the gate open and wheeled himself into the vacant back yard. Looking around to make sure no one was watching, he grabbed the letter and placed it in his lap. He looked at the postmark.

"Colorado Springs," he mumbled to himself. "So that's where she is."

He cast one last glance at the house and began to wheel himself backward, trying to stay on the cobblestone walkway. He cursed his chair as he made his way back to the gate, opening the rod iron latch. At least his hands weren't broken too, he thought to himself. Hastily he pushed himself down the street and stopped under a large Elm tree to rest and read the letter. His eyes scanned it quickly.

"Engaged…she became engaged?" He couldn't believe it.

… Luckily for me, Sully was able to push me and himself out of harms way.

…Yes, Sully finally came back.

…I know how you feel about him.

…in spite of everything, he's a good man.

…and I thought you should know that I was planning on telling Jackson that I wasn't going to marry him. I know this may come as a shock to you, but I was actually on my way to tell him when this horrible accident occurred.

Her words confused him more. Why didn't she want to marry this man? Could it be that she still…was in love with him?

…Everything is so confusing now. I need time to process it all. I need time to be alone.

"There you are!" A woman in her thirties grabbed the back of his wheeled chair. "How did you get out here? I've been looking for you all afternoon!"

He placed the letter back in the envelope and shoved it in his pocket.

"Mr. Strauss, are you listening to me?"