Chapter 21 Sick Twisted Fantasy

Ludwig inhaled once he finally got to the library. The walk there hadn't been long in the slightest, but he was dealing with a shorter stride than he was accustomed to. Besides, there was also the mystery as to why Kamek wanted to see Lemmy in the first place. Ludwig was kind of on the fence about that; did he wish for Kamek to dole out a punishment for his younger brother, or should he be weary about any unfair retribution that the royal vizier would place in his lap?

Well, Ludwig didn't have time to think about that. He turned the corner of one of the bookshelves and saw Kamek reading a book at one of the round tables. Ludwig knocked on the side of the shelf like a door, which caused the magikoopa to look up. He smiled and stood up.

"Ah, Ludwig. Come on in; have a seat."

The oldest Koopaling blinked. "Ludwig…?" He titled his head up, surprise striking his heart. "Wait, you know?!"

Kamek smirked. "Yeah, little bit."

"Oh come on!" Ludwig fell into an agitated mood. He walked closer. "Who told you? Was it Larry?"

"Don't worry," Kamek said with a reassuring tone. "None of your siblings spilled the beans; I figured it out on my own. When you run into a Koopa in the music hall who looks and sounds just like you, and yet has a completely different personality, you're bound to piece together that at least something is amiss."

This pinch of realization gave Ludwig's agitation an even hotter flavor. "Oh great; you were there too?" He sighed, closed his eyes, and massaged his right temple. "Excuse me while I add that to my ever growing list of reasons to murder Lemmy."

"Oh please!" Kamek exclaimed with a roll of the eyes. "Don't give your brother so much credit; you weren't all that discreet either. Yesterday, Bowser came to me about a request he got from 'Lemmy' about not having to room with 'Ludwig.'" Kamek smiled. "Oh, and just to let you know, Bowser knows now too. We had a good laugh at the irony of the whole situation." He closed the book he had been reading. "So nice try, Ludwig Vanessa, but it's gonna take a lot more than that to get out of being roommates with Lemmy."

Ludwig's heart sank. "Ggggrrreeeeaaaaattt," he exhaled.

Kamek snickered. "Well. Now that all the fun scolding stuff is out of the way, I suppose we can move onto the obligatory interview. So…" he took a seat, replacing his giddy expression with a serious one. "How'd it happen?"

Ludwig pulled the chair out and took a seat on Kamek's right. "It happened about three days ago. A koopa troopa who had gotten his body stolen by a duplighost came to the castle right after Lemmy and I had a fight. And, of course being the noble heroes we are, all seven of us went to go fight it. Well, the duplighost tried to take possession of me, but didn't account for the fact that I have ways of fighting back. I used my electricity to get out of his hold, which created a bunch of arcane blasts and ultimately ended up knocking me out. And, when I woke up, I came to discover that I was in Lemmy's body, and Lemmy was in mine." Ludwig sighed. "And currently still is."

Kamek blinked, his eyes growing wide. "Wait, you're saying you went to fight a duplighost? You're kidding, right?"

Ludwig put his hand to his temple again. "Wish I was!"

Kamek exhaled, the breath containing layers of disbelief. "Good Grambi! You guys should have come to me immediately; fighting a duplighost is a fool's errand if you don't know what you're doing!" He sighed. "Well, I guess I can get some satisfaction out of knowing you learned your lesson at least."

Ludwig scoffed. "Yeah, that's not a lesson I was really itching to learn. Neither, for that matter, was finding out what the 'going to the bathroom' experience for Lemmy was like."

Kamek nodded. He looked down at the surface of the table, interlocking his fingers in a contemplative manner. "Well, knowing what kind of Koopa you are, I assume you tried to swap back?"

"We tried a few methods." Ludwig crossed his arms and leaned back. "But obviously, none of them worked. The first thing I did was go through that spellbook you got me for my eighteenth, but I couldn't find anything to help."

Kamek nodded. "That makes sense." His tone and expression were gloomier than a rainstorm

Ludwig kept his eyes on the tabletop., replaying the events of the first day over again in his mind. Then, something occurred to him. "Wait a minute." It was so obvious he was surprised he didn't think of it sooner. "I just realized! You're the most powerful magikoopa in the kingdom; you know spells that aren't even in the spellbook! You can fix this, right?"

Kamek made a reluctant face. "Ehh, not exactly. You see, part of the reason why duplighosts are so dangerous is because they're VERY strong. My magic isn't even on the same tier level as theirs. A lot of magikoopas over the course of the last few centuries have attempted to do what they do, but there's only one spell that even comes close in terms of function. And, based on the quality of the sound that has been coming out of your brother's throat throughout this whole conversation, I'm willing to guess you know what it is."

Ludwig didn't even blink as he reached his hand to his throat. "The voice transfer spell," he whispered

"Correct." Even though he had just been confirmed to be correct, there was absolutely no smugness in Kamek's expression. Just sadness; sadness and sympathy.

Ludwig's heart sank even lower. He lowered his head, putting his arms on the table as his jaw went a little slack. "So you really can't help us?"

"I'm sorry. I would if I could, but…I can't."

Ludwig sank into his chair. "So I guess fighting the duplighost again is our only option." He shook his head. "But in order to reverse the spell, we're going to have to recreate the accident." Ludwig grasped the top of his head. "But Lemmy has my powers right now; how are we going to do that?"

A spark ignited in Kamek's eyes. "Well….I wouldn't say fighting the duplighost again is your only option."

Ludwig turned. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you know, there are a lot more powerful forces in this universe than magic. Like love, for example." Kamek smirked. "Or the urge to vomit when you eat a garlic pancake at one of Wario's casinos."

Ludwig wrinkled his nose. "Well, I highly doubt soiling myself is gonna do much to help in this scenario, so I guess I'm on my own." He pushed the chair back and stood up. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some very important things I need to get back to, including but not limited to: getting my voice back from Lemmy, buying some new toothbrushes, and making sure this atrocious tri-color mohawk gets a decent wash for a change. So, thanks for nothing, you can expect to get your check in the mail."

"My pleasure." Kamek smiled as Ludwig started walking away. "Have fun with Lemmy 101."

"Oh believe me, I plan to." Ludwig took four steps forward before he stopped and turned back around. "Wait, did you find out about the swap when you ran into Lemmy, or when you heard about what I did?"

Kamek chortled, the sound escaping through his smiling lips. "Let's just say it's not what you originally thought."

Once again, the surface of Ludwig's ego cracked. "Ah. So it was me. That's fantastic." He turned back around and made his way out of the library.