So hi guys another chapter :) Sorry for such a long wait :s Being an adult and sorting out a place to live is apparently stressful and a creativity killer :s Anyhoo - as you know I only own my OC and own lyrics - anything else belongs to their respective owners :) Now on with the show!
X-Men The Imperfect Angel Saga – Part Two: Second Chances
Chapter Three: And it Felt Beautiful, and I Felt Beautiful...
Erik's POV
I watched with wide eyes as I got a closer look at the man who stepped out of the blue smoke. He was dark blue in colour, and I was able to just about see what appeared to be tattoos etched into his skin. He also had jet black hair and pointed tipped ears – like the kind of ears you see on an elf. I also noticed the tail with a triangular point on the end swaying rhythmically.
"I'm sorry if my appearance startles you. My name is Kurt Wagner – better known as Nightcrawler." The man explained – a German accent very prevalent when he spoke.
"Kurt – can you get Erik into this room? I warn you it will be very cold and Caroline's powers are also very unpredictable." The Professor asked concisely.
"I need to be able to see where I am going. Otherwise we could end up in a wall or another place entirely. And what do you mean by 'unpredictable'?" Kurt replied nervously, as he looked in the direction of the slowly freezing bathroom.
"She has a lot of powers, and she can't control them all yet – hence this latest meltdown and loss of control." The Professor replied concisely.
"Ok Professor – I will try. Erik, keep a firm hold on me and don't let go." Kurt said quickly. After keeping a hold on his shoulder, we disappeared in a puff of smoke – and a moment later I found myself in the frozen bathroom.
"Caroline? It's me Erik." I said slowly, in the hopes she will calm down from just my presence alone.
"What exactly are Caroline's powers?"
"Her main power is being able to mimic any power after witnessing it once. She can then use any of the powers at will without having to witness the power again." I replied concisely.
"What's your power?" Kurt asked curiously.
"I...can manipulate people...just with the power of my voice alone."
"Can't you just use your voice to get Caroline to stop using her powers?" Kurt asked curiously.
"Caroline is the only one unaffected by my powers. Apparently learning my power makes her immune to its effects." I replied quietly, as I considered my next move – all the while the room became colder by the second. I proceeded to do the only thing I knew affected her – and that was proceed to open my mouth and sing.
When you're alone, silence is all you'll know.
When you're alone, silence is all you'll know.
Let in the noise and let it grow.
At first the ice continued to grow around us, as Kurt and I started shivering violently.
When you're alone, silence is all you see.
When you're alone, silence is all you'll be
Give me your hand and come to me.
Yet she didn't give me her hand, nor did she take my outstretched one.
When you are here, music is all around.
When you are near, music is all around.
Open your eyes, don't make a sound.
Eventually our shivering slowly lessened as the ice started lessening also.
Let in the shadow, let in the shadow,
Let in the light of your bright shadow.
Let in the shadow, let in the shadow.
Let in the light of your bright shadow.
We stopped shivering and the ice began to thaw more quickly – making me realise her powers were starting to calm down again.
Let in the light.
Let in the light.
Let in the light of your sweet shadow.
Eventually the ice had all vanished, as I heard the door open slowly.
"Here's a warm towel, I bet Caroline is cold after her shower and nearly freezing the school." I then noticed everyone averted their eyes, as I kept my eyes looking up before parting the curtain slowly. After quickly wrapped an unconscious Caroline in the towel, I took her through to her bedroom, before placing her under the covers.
"We should leave her to rest – that meltdown has taken a lot out of her apparently. Maybe when she is rested and calm, we can see what we can do to help – so this doesn't happen again." I said stoically. And with that we left the room, as Caroline slept peacefully in her bed.
"Erik, could you come with me a moment? There are some things we need to talk about – don't worry you aren't in any trouble." The Professor said in a fatherly manner, before making our way to his office. Once we were safely ensconced inside, the Professor asked curiously.
"How much do you know about Caroline? The only thing I know about her is her powers, and that was only after they first manifested themselves. It was difficult to sense her on Cerebro because her powers are so sporadic."
"I'm afraid I know nothing much about her. Although when she was in my world, I noticed some strange behavioural patterns. However she never told me why she behaved the way she did whilst she was there." I replied quietly.
"What kind of strange behaviour has she been exhibiting? Maybe I can shed a little light on things." The Professor asked curiously.
"She didn't make many friends whilst in my world, and she appeared to be particularly sensitive to noise and touch. She also had these bouts of emotional anguish – like she would be in floods of tears and nothing could calm her down – except the sound of my singing voice. There are also times when she doesn't make eye contact, and she seems to tap out a rhythm with her fingers when anxious." I replied concisely.
"Have you ever thought of the possibility that she is Autistic?" The Professor asked curiously, to which I felt my eyebrows furrow in confusion.
"Autistic? What do you mean?"
"Ah of course – the term wasn't coined in your time period. Autism is a developmental disorder of variable severity, characterised by difficulty in social interaction and communication, as well as restricted or repetitive patterns of thought and behaviour." Professor X replied concisely.
"That makes sense – I guess that's why she never told me about it before – because the term didn't exist in my world or time period. She was probably afraid of being judged or people being scared of her."
"And probably why she didn't tell you she was a mutant – that term didn't exist in your time period either." Professor X continued.
"I think it should be safe to check on Caroline. I just want to make sure she is ok."
"It is late now – you should get some rest. We can check on Caroline in the morning." Professor X said gently. With a resigned sigh I made my way to my room, despite wanting to check on Caroline's wellbeing.
-The next morning-
The moment I woke up I immediately went in the direction of Caroline's room – the only concern in my mind at that moment was of Caroline's wellbeing. When I reached her door I listened intently, waiting to hear a noise coming from within. Yet when I listened closely, all I could hear was her rhythmic breathing – signalling to me she was still peacefully asleep. I guess I cannot fathom how she can sleep for so long as I don't fully understand her Autism yet. But I decided to leave her alone to wake in her own time, as I had a feeling she wouldn't appreciate being woken up early - especially after such a draining ordeal the night before. I then sought out the library – in the hopes reading a book could distract me from my worry for a while. Yet when I tried reading the book, all the words became a jumbled mess in front of me. What was wrong with me? Was I distracted by other thoughts and that was why everything was jumbled? Was lack of sleep the cause? After pacing for what felt like hours, I went in the direction of Caroline's room – hoping by now she was awake. I smiled a little when I heard music coming from inside, yet the piece sounded so forlorn and melancholy. What has made her so sad? I remember the way she conveyed her emotions through song in my world – so does that mean she can only convey her emotions through music? As I continued to listen to the song she was playing, I realised it was the song I sung to her the night before. I just sat outside the door as she continued to play, knowing she doesn't appreciate being interrupted when she is playing. All too soon the song finished, and so I proceeded to knock on the door firmly.
"Caroline? Are you ok in there? You have been in there an awfully long time." I asked gently, the only thing concerning me right now was her well-being.
"I'm fine." She said quietly in reply, before the playing resumed with full force. Yet I could tell she wasn't fine, as the song had this underlying emotion to it that I couldn't place. For once I put aside all reservations, as I knocked on the door firmly.
"Please Caroline answer the door – I am worried about your wellbeing!" I exclaimed concernedly through the door. The playing increased in intensity in both sound and emotion – causing my knocking to also increase in intensity. Eventually I pushed all thoughts of propriety aside as I pushed the door open.
"Just stay out of my head!" She screamed the moment I came through the door.
"It's just me, Erik. I cannot penetrate your thoughts." I said gently, hoping to placate her.
"I can tell someone tried penetrating my head last night. But somehow I managed to block them out – and I don't want to experience that sensation ever again. It felt like someone was stabbing needles into my mind." She said tearfully.
"I'm sorry you had to experience that – I want to ensure that experience never happens to you again." I replied passionately, before embracing her tightly. I had to suppress a sigh when I felt her tense within my embrace.
"I'm sorry if I have been too forward or overstepped a boundary. But I am just concerned about your wellbeing. I would never want to hurt you intentionally." I said gently, as I held her hand and stroked the knuckles gently.
"Sorry, I just naturally tense up when I get hugs without warning. I'm not sure why, but this has always been the case all my life. I tense up really bad when strangers touch me or when relatives I haven't really met give me a hug." She replied quietly.
"I won't judge you for feeling such reservations. But I'll ensure to take things slowly with you, and give you a warning before I embrace you next time." I said gently.
"But come, it is time for our control lessons with the Professor." I continued, before gently leading her out of her room. During the walk to the Professor's office, we walked in contemplative silence, which I could tell was setting Caroline's nerves on edge – as the rhythmic tapping resumed with full force. We soon reached the Professor's office, and after knocking we waited to be allowed inside.
"Enter." I heard the Professor say from inside, to which we entered the office slowly – Caroline's tapping still evident in the air.
"Ah Caroline glad to see you up and about. Also I heard you playing your violin just now, it sounds absolutely splendid, and so beautiful. How long have you been learning for?" The Professor asked curiously.
"About six months I think – to be honest it is really difficult to keep track of time when you teleport from one world to another. Especially when the other world is in a different time period to your own." Caroline replied quietly.
"That is impressive to be playing such complex pieces so early on in your teaching. Anyway, down to the business at hand. We're going to try the same exercise as during yesterday's lesson – however I am going to do something a little different this time." The Professor said concisely, before we made our way towards the Danger Room.
"Ok so this is the same exercise as before – I want you to draw out one power – just one power – and use it to hit this target here. After hitting the target, I want you to draw out a different power and hit the target again." The Professor continued concisely, pointing to the target positioned in front of us. Was there anything else he was doing differently, and if so why wasn't he explaining it to us? I watched closely as Caroline closed her eyes and concentrated on summoning one of her powers. But how was she going to hit the target without seeing it? Suddenly I noticed Caroline's eyebrows furrowing deeply – almost like she was in pain. I then looked up to see the Professor holding his index and middle finger to his temple – the same motions he goes through when he is penetrating someone's mind. But before I could go to stop him, I watched as Caroline appeared to be trying to push him out of her mind. There appeared to be a battle of wills, as neither Caroline nor the Professor was willing to back down. Suddenly the Professor drew back with a gasp, before holding his head in his hands.
"She has shut me out again. I don't think anyone will be able to penetrate her mind, ever." The Professor said quietly, as I continued to watch Caroline closely – her eyes still closed and her face now still. Suddenly there was an explosion as Caroline summoned a red laser. But where did it come from? I then noticed the lasers were coming out of her eyes – promptly destroying the target in front of us. But as quickly as the lasers appeared, they disappeared again.
"Interesting, Cyclops – one of our mutants – has that exact same power. However he has to wear red shades, to prevent the lasers coming out of his eyes whenever they are open. Caroline however appears to know how to make the lasers come at will - all without any teaching from me." The Professor said concisely. Does this mean she witnessed this Cyclops use his powers at some point? Another target soon appeared, just as I witnessed Caroline summoning an icicle from her fingertips. I suppressed the urge to step back, as a moment later the icicle pierced the centre of the target.
"Well done Caroline for hitting the targets. I think we can try another exercise tomorrow - I want to see if you will allow me to penetrate your mind – as I felt resistance today." The Professor said gently. However I quickly embraced Caroline when she suddenly burst into tears. As she shook her head rapidly, I could hear her muttering under her breath the same thing over and over again.
"Please no...not again...please no...not again...please no...not again..." As I stroked her hair gently, trying my best to soothe her – I saw the Professor look at us with furrowed brows.
"What has distressed her so? And what does she mean when she says that?" He asked curiously. As I continued to stroke her hair soothingly, I replied quietly.
"It appears she is particularly sensitive to the sensations of someone penetrating her mind. She finds the sensation particularly unpleasant – I think we should find alternative lesson plans for tomorrow. I am worried that if her mind is penetrated again, her powers might become out of control."
"I won't penetrate her mind again – not after getting such a violent reaction from her. Although this is the first time I have seen someone reacting so violently to my powers being used on them." I looked down to see Caroline leaning against my chest, to which I lifted her up in my arms, before carrying her out of the Danger Room. I guess she cried herself to sleep after being so distressed. As we went in the direction of her room, I said matter of factly.
"I think there is a lot about her powers we do not fully understand yet. I'm not sure whether these reactions are to do with her powers, or her Autism, or a combination of the two. However I have noticed that my power doesn't affect her – I cannot use my voice to influence her decisions at all."
"That is strange how your powers have no effect on her. Is it a possibility that when she learns a power – it either has no effect on her, or it has an adverse effect on her instead? I guess that the other possibility is that the Autism makes her powers erratic and unpredictable." We soon reached her room, and after laying her down under the covers, we left her alone to rest. But before we were able to leave out of the door, I heard Caroline wake up with a start.
"What happened?! Where am I?! How did I get here?!" She asked quickly, panic evident in her voice.
"It's ok you're in your room! I brought you here after you collapsed a moment ago. You got particularly distressed after the Professor suggested penetrating your mind again." I explained quickly.
"I'm sorry Caroline for suggesting such a thing. I will never try penetrating your mind again unless it is a last resort." The Professor said, reaching out his right hand to touch her in a fatherly manner. He pulled away a moment later when he saw Caroline tense up.
"I'll leave you to spend your afternoon however you wish to - you're free to do as you please." The Professor said jovially, before wheeling himself out of the room. I watched as Caroline got out of bed, before brushing down her clothes and going towards her violin. After quickly tuning her violin, she immediately started playing a scale – by the sounds of things it was the scale of D major. Yet despite it being a simple scale – there was such emotion and passion behind it.
"Caroline...please talks to me...I can tell something is wrong..." I pleaded through her intense playing. She stopped playing for a moment, before releasing a reluctant sigh.
"I wish I could control my powers better, and be stronger. There are times when I feel like I am a danger to society – that I should be locked away so I cannot hurt anyone." She replied sadly.
"You do not need to lock yourself away – the world needs to witness your talents and your personality." I said passionately, as I drew my hand slowly down her neck – hoping it would calm her mind. Soon enough a look of serenity overcame her features, and a single tear fell down her cheek.
"And it felt beautiful, and I felt beautiful." I heard her murmur, as the tears started to fall harder.
"Lost in the music once more, feeling it rise up and soar, alive once again..." I murmured in response.
"I'm sorry, I'm not sure what came over me there. It was like I was lost to the world for a moment. I was so overcome with emotion – so many emotions – and I couldn't fully understand them all." She said meekly, as she wiped the tear tracks from her face.
"There's no need to apologise. But we'll find a way together to help you understand the emotions you are experiencing, no matter what it takes." I said passionately, to which there was no visible reaction from Caroline – not even a reply. I guess there are so many things I will never truly understand about Caroline. Yet am I willing to accept the fact that I may never get to fully understand her...?