(A/N: Disclaimer: Why do I do this to myself? ...Oh yeah, to get away from the awfulness that is Sabrina The Animated Series episodes for the Across The Multiverse story. That's sad to admit, that Care Bears helped with my mitosis. Plus, my brain thought, 'Hey, you're already doing it as a story, why not do it as a review?' Curse you, brain. Anyways, enjoy the review.)
A trio of glowing dots looked at the readers.
Critical Mew, looking for you
The glowing dots split into the Regi Trio.
Critical Mew, where are you?
The Critical Mew flies in, wearing a trench coat and a hat, giving the readers a wink.
Come on, Mew, where you been?
The Critical Mew took off the trench coat and used Transform, becoming a king, a dame with blonde hair, a waiter and an Elvis impersonator.
Trouble's on the loose again
A mysterious figure showed up, trying to crush Mew with a sandbag, only to narrowly miss. He looked behind him to the embodiment of stress, who proceeded to chase him to a door of things to review, which began to do the Thriller hip movements.
(Mew)
They're not gonna get you
(Critical Mew)
The Regi Trio went in a protective circle in front of Mew, protecting him.
Uh uh, the Regi Trio's gonna help you
(Mew)
Mew was in a barrel full of toys, deciding to peek out only for the floor to break under him, causing him to grab a loose floorboard with his tail.
Ooh, the comment's gonna be there
Registeel jumped on the floorboard, launching Mew into the air. Regice and Regirock caught Mew in their arms.
And the readers too
The Critical Mew floated past Lavender Town, only for the ghost of Marowak to appear, scaring him away.
Critical Mew, looking for you
Mew was surrounded by loads of Ghost and Dark-Type Pokemon, all about to ambush him.
Critical Mew, where are you?
Only for the Regi Trio to attack them all, saving Mew as they head back to the Tree of Beginning.
Mew, Critical Mew
Mew
The stuff to be reviewed danced once again, doing the Thriller hip moves.
Critical Mew
Mew
A pair of eyes zoom out, showing Mew and the Regi Trio with the Tree of Beginning in the background.
Critical Mew!
The Critical Mew-Season One
Episode 3: The Care Bears Movie
Tree of Beginning, Kanto Region
Mew groaned with his face on the table. The DVD for The Care Bears Movie was right next to him.
"You know, I gotta say, my work isn't always easy." Mew said, raising his head up. "Granted, this is technically a punishment, yet it's the greatest job ever. But if someone at work asks me, 'Hey, what did you do today?' and I have to answer, 'I watched The Care Bears Movie,' I die a little on the inside." Mew continued.
"No joke, I die a little. How can anyone say that with a shred of dignity? How can anyone say that with pride?" Mew asked, being silent for a moment. "You can't. Roll it." Mew said, as Registeel put the DVD into a random DVD player.
('Care-A-Lot', sung by Carole King, plays in the background)
"Yeah, the Care Bears were big back in the 1980s. Disgustingly nice, disgustingly cute and disgustingly marketable. Any child would fall for their trap. It's much worse than if every cute thing got together and had a convention. Heck, it's much worse than Pikachu being cute, Kirby being nice and Mario being marketable!" Mew said.
"And sure, you all would say, "Aw, you're being harsh Mew. What about that time you were laughing as you fell off the windmill rotor and landed on the ones underneath the others, like on New Island?'" Mew said.
"I'll let you in on one thing: that wasn't laughter of joy, that was laughter of pain. And Mewtwo didn't help much when he threw that Shadow Ball at me. Celebi forced me to stay here for two weeks, just to recover. You don't want to know how she managed that." Mew said, terrified by the memory.
"Plus, you all are not helping with my reputation, given a certain Anime Abandon hates the fact that I'm cute." Mew added before shaking his head. "But we're not here to talk about my cuteness problems. We're talking about Care Bears."
"So, is it as bad as I'm making it out to be? Let's find out. This is," Mew said before groaning a bit, "The Care Bears Movie. Registeel, why do you do this to me?" Mew asked.
"Because you did a double feature of Crystal Rose of Pollux The 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo second season. You need something that you think is bad so that we don't have rainbows and sunshines coming out of your mouth every review!" Registeel shouted.
"Ugh, curse you, Registeel, for being right. Then again, I do need to be unbiased with these reviews," Mew said.
"However, before we begin the film, I think a proper history lesson is in order. Regirock, if you may," Mew said.
Regirock cleared his throat before pulling out a point stick and pointing at the Hallmark logo. "Hallmark! A greeting card company back in the 1900s, they had cards for everything. Then, in 1981, an artist by the name of Elena Kucharik painted designs of multi-colored bears for the cards. Then, in 1983, they were made as plush teddy bears.
"Two years later, they would have their first T.V. show, followed by the first film, which not only saved Nelvana, but also beat The Black Cauldron, which not only surprised Disney, but renewed interest in animated films for both kids and adults, which brings us to now." Regirock explained.
"Thanks for the history lesson," Mew said, actually interested.
"No problem, sir." Regirock said as he left.
"Anyways, we begin the film at an orphanage, somewhere in a world without Pokémon, where children are doing some last minute prayer before bedtime. Somehow, that's not the most shocking thing to ever happen in these reviews," Mew said.
Children: Bless all the people young and old, for they are yours to love and hold, and bless Mr. and Mrs. Cherrywood, amen.
Mrs. Cheerywood stood at the door, waiting till the kids were done praying.
Mrs. Cherrywood: Good night, children. Sweet dreams.
Mew spit out his drink. "No way! Is that...yeah, it is! Mrs. Cherrywood is voiced by the late Billie Mae Richards, who not only voiced Tenderheart Bear in this film as well, but also does Rudoph the Red-Nosed Reindeer from the Rankin-Bass films as well." Mew said with joy, before remembering what he was doing and cleared his throat.
"Anyways, the kids are in bed, but they're waiting for Mr. Cherrywood, played by the late Mickey Rooney, to tuck them in. Luckily for them, Mr. Cherrywood comes into the room to tuck them in a fun way." Mew said.
Mr. Cherrywood: *Pulls out juggling balls* Look sharp, everyone. Watch the bouncing balls. *Start juggling the juggling balls* All righty, here we go. A-one, a-two, a-three. And then...ah-ah-ah! *Finishes his juggling act by catching all the balls* Thank you, thank you and...thank you. Now off to sleep to dream of clowns and circuses, acrobats and jugglers. And remember: I want a full report in the morning.
"Those kids are lucky. Back when I was growing up, Arceus never did those kinds of stuff. Nooo, he has to monitor the world and think I can handle falling asleep myself. ...My dad is a jerk," Mew muttered to himself, pouting slightly.
However, he shook off those thoughts and feelings of bitterness. "Nope, I'm not going that far just to earn pity points. It happened in the past, and nothing can change that. Plus, I don't need pity." Mew added.
"Anyways, the kids want to hear a story, which Mr. Cherrywood decided to do so. But before he could tell a story, he needed to put on his…" Mew trailed off.
Toddler girl: Story hat, story hat!
(As the children are waiting, Mrs. Cherrywood gives her husband his top hat.)
"Oh, yeah. Duh!" Mew did a face-palm, er, face-paw? "He needs his story hat on. Thanks, little girl, for reminding us of that.
"So, Mr. Cherrywood begins the story. What is it about? Isn't the title of this film hint enough?" Mew asked.
Mr. Cherrywood: This is the story of two young children named Kim and Jason, and how they were helped by a group of very special friends: the Care Bears.
"Ugh, I don't like the face he makes when he says that." Mew cringed.
Mr. Cherrywood: ...the Care Bears.
"Ugh! That's creepy. It's not as bad as Ganon trying to kill Vincent, but this barely missed the 10th spot of the 10 things for 'What The Heck Is Wrong With The World?!' list I have made."
Mew said, cringing in disgust.
Mr. Cherrywood: You see, the Care Bears have a very special mission, and that mission is to help everyone share their feelings with others. The Care Bears live in a magic place...called Care-a-lot.
"So, as the first song plays, we see the Care Bears just doing things with this song, 'Care-A-Lot', written and sung by Carole King, playing in the background. And I know this has been done to death before, but doesn't Carole King sound so bored while singing this?" Mew asked.
Care-a-lot is a place we all can go
Whenever we choose it
"Care-A-Lot is paying for my career
"So might as well volunteer," Mew sang in a bored tone.
"Okay, some of you might be mad at my joke. And, yeah, her bored tone does nothing to impact the song. Then again, some of the covers for this song I heard also sound like they were bored out of their minds." Mew commented.
"Boo! You stink!" A random Ledian cried out, throwing a tomato at Mew's face.
"...After getting this treatment in the previous episode, I've grown used to it," Mew said, wiping the tomato off his face.
"Anyways, if you want to hear the song, go on YouTube and listen to the whole thing." Mew suggested.
"But back to the point. Two Care Bears, known as Friend Bear and Secret Bear, go to Earth after Wish Bear noticed that two kids stopped caring. Specifically, Manhattan. Did I forget to mention this supposedly takes place in 1967? Oh, and by 'go to Earth', I mean crashing into a tree." Mew said.
The Cloud-mobile disappeared after Friend Bear and Secret Bear crashed into the tree.
Secret Bear: *Whispers into Friend Bear's ears*
Friend Bear: No, Secret Bear, I don't think it was the Cloud-mobile's fault.
"After all, it had a face, so it would've seen the tree and avoided crashing into it, Secret Bear. Gosh, blaming things on a sentient car that has a steering wheel, thus needing to be driven." Mew said with an eye roll.
"Anyways, Secret Bear notices the two kids are watching them and points them out to Friend Bear." Mew said.
Friend Bear: Hi. I'm Friend Bear and this is Secret Bear. We're Care Bears.
Jason: What do you want?
Friend Bear: Only to be your friends.
"Well, that's one way to make someone care." Mew said, before trying to suppress his giggles...and failing.
"Plus, I just have to laugh at how Kim and Jason are not reacting to the Care Bears. I mean, they're acting like talking, multi-colored bears are normal." Mew said before bursting into hysterical laughter.
After a moment, Mew controlled himself. "Then again, when there's Greek Gods hanging around on the top of the Empire State Building, a camp for demigods nearby and an evil Roman emperor trying to rule the United States with two others in different parts of the USA, maybe it is normal for New York to be used to weird and magical stuff like this." Mew added.
Mr. Cherrywood: You see, although Kim and Jason were warm and loving children, they had been so hurt when their parents went away that they had decided never to love anyone ever again, just in case they, too, went away. Kim and Jason felt they didn't need anyone, but the Care Bears knew better.
"I wonder, what did happen to their parents?" Mew asked. He then looked up the internet to find the answer.
"...Their parents died in a car crash?! When did that happen?! Better yet, why did no one mention this anywhere? I mean, yeah, Wikipedia isn't always reliable, but even the Care Bears Wiki points that out. I think this should've been mentioned somewhere in the film or something!" Mew said.
"Also, I wonder what counts as caring? Like, if I were to go to a restaurant with Celebi and she asks, 'Hey, what restaurant do you want to go to?' and I were to say, 'Who cares, as long as it has great fo-'," Mew realized his mistake with his word choice.
"No, no, wait." Mew said, but it was too late as a shimmer of light appeared, as a random Care Bear was off-screen. Mew groaned while putting his face on the table.
"Hi, we're the Care Bears! And everyone has to care about some-'' the Care Bear began.
Mew, not wanting to hear any of this, uses his psychic powers to send the Care Bear back to Care-A-Lot.
"The sad thing is, this isn't the first time this happened." Mew admitted.
"Anyways, the two Care Bears tried to be friends with Kim and Jason," Mew said, getting the review back on track.
Friend Bear: Everyone needs friends, Jason, even you and Kim.
Kim: We're not your friends.
Jason: How do you know our names?
"While that is a reasonable question, Jason, that should be question number 5. Your first question should be, have they been stalking you?" Mew said.
"Also, did I forget to mention Kim is voiced by Cree Summer, who voiced Chloe Flan in Sabrina The Animated Series, Susie Carmichael from Rugrats and their spin-off series, Numbuh Five from Codename: Kids Next Door and Princess Kida from Disney's Atlantis: The Lost Empire.
Friend Brear: We know a lot of things about you. Kim reads a lot of books and wants to be a nurse when she grows up. And, Jason, you wanna be a jet pilot.
Jason: Yeah. How did you know that?
Friend Bear: Friends are supposed to know about each other's hopes and dreams.
"Friends, stalkers, they're always nice and caring." Mew said.
"...Uh, Mew, there's something wrong with that statement." Regice said.
"I know that," Mew stated, before pushing a button that said, 'Back to the review'.
"Anyways, their attempts to get Kim and Jason to care backfires, since the two kids believe that anyone who cares for them will let them down and walk away. ...Man, this got sad pretty quick," Mew said, looking away.
"But no time for that. We turn our focus to the other side of Manhattan, at a carnival, where the leader of the Care Bears, Tenderheart Bear, went to check up on a teenager named Nicholas, who is a magician apprentice." Mew said.
Mr. Cherrywood(narrating): Nicholas was a magician's helper. He had never had a friend in his life.
Nicholas attempted to drag the heavy trunk, but failed. He then tried to get the attention of the van driver, who dropped off the trunk, but the driver turned on the van and drove off, as the smoke from the exhaust vent got in Nicholas's face.
Nicholas: Thanks.
"Wow, this kid has rotten luck. Someone should help him or give him a hug or something." Mew said. "Not only because he has no friends, but because the magician he apprenticed to is a real jerk." Mew said.
"Oh, you don't believe me? Watch this and tell me I'm wrong!" Mew shouted, pointing at the scene.
Mr. Fetuccini was doing a house of cards when one of the cards fell due to the wind coming through the open door. He turned around, annoyed, to glare at Nicholas.
Mr. Fetuccini: Hey! Close the door!
Nicholas attempted to close the door, but the weight of the trunk shifted his balance back, causing him to stumble backwards and fall, crashing down to the ground. However, Mr. Fetuccini's concern was more for his house of cards than his young ward.
Said house of cards fell, causing Mr. Fetuccini to let out an annoyed sigh before standing up with a firm expression.
"And does he do anything to help Nicholas? If your answer is no, then you're smarter than a Slowpoke!" Mew said as a banner appeared behind him, saying, 'Congratulations for being smarter than an average Slowpoke!' with confetti coming out of nowhere.
Nicholas: I-I didn't mean it.
Mr. Fetuccini(angry):You never mean it, Nicholas. I bought that trunk thinking maybe there's some junk in it I can use in my magic act. Now half of it's broken! (Sighing.) What am I going to do with you? Every time I give you a simple thing to do, it's boom this and crash that!
Nicholas: I'm sorry, Mr. Fetuccini.
At that moment, Tenderheart stealthily made his way into the trailer and was behind Mr. Fetuccini.
Mr. Fetuccini: Enough of your sorry's. Check that new trunk and see if there's anything left I can use in my magic act. I have a show to put on.
Mr. Fetuccini left the back room as Tenderheart ducked under the dressing table.
Mr. Fetuccini(getting ready for his show): Perhaps one day I will teach you how to make an audience love you. But right now you're next to hopeless.
"And that's why you don't have friends, Nicholas. Nor do you have parents, who may or may not still be alive and I may or may not be hiding you from," Mew said, imitating Mr. Fetuccini.
"Seriously, what crawled up his butt and died, a Shellder? I get that someone who makes more than one mistake might warrant a stern lecture or scolding, but this...this is just stupid. It's like I decided to punish Mewtwo for forgetting the lesson he learned the first time around, or Victini punishing Ash and Pikachu for failing to win a Pokemon League six times in a row. Just because someone made a mistake more than once doesn't mean you get to call them hopeless, you talentless sack of garbage!" Mew ranted.
"Anyways, as Nicholas starts to sort through the stuff, an evil book, more evil than Twilight, heard his wish." Mew said.
Nicholas: I wish… I'd give anything to find a way to get people to like me.
The wrapping on The Spirit falls off, revealing the glowing green book she is in.
The Spirit: Anything? *Nicholas started to look around, wondering where the voice came from* Nicholas?
Nicholas: Who's there? *Nicholas stood up, still looking around* Who said that?
The Spirit: You did say "anything"?
Nicholas backed away from the book, falling into the trunk, which knocked him out cold.
"I think Ash Williams said it best," Mew said, pulling out the scene from The Army of Darkness.
Ash Williams: It was never meant for the world of the living.
As he said those words, the Book of the Dead was slammed shut and tossed to the sides.
"So while that happens, we're shown Care-A-Lot, where three Care Bears are working on a 'Rainbow Rescue Beam'." Mew said, reading the instruction manual for said device.
"Wonder why this is here. Better yet, who makes their buttons look like Lucky Charm marshmallows? That's asking for the Lucky Charms guy to come and mess with this." Mew added.
"Oh well, probably not important," he commented, before throwing it to the side.
"However, after some minor scenes involving Tugs and Hugs Bear believing the device can make bubbles, the beam works, bringing up Friend Bear and Secret Bear. However, it also brought up Kim and Jason despite it not being supposed to," Mew said.
Jason(Interrupting the Care Bears, all of whom were discussing what to do): Hey, could we say something? Where are we?
Funshine Bear: We're terribly sorry. Bears?
All the Care Bears stood side by side, prepared to introduce themselves.
Care Bears: We're the Care Bears.
Kim and Jason: More friends?
Mew snorted in laughter, suppressing the urge to burst into uncontrollable laughter. "I can see the reason why Nostalgia Critic like these kids. They have the appropriate reactions." Mew remarked.
"Anyways, the Care Bears give the kids a tour of Care-A-Lot via a song number, 'Nobody Cares Like A Bear', by John Sebastian. What's the judge's take after one lyric?" Mew asked, showing a random lyric.
When you think nobody cares (Nobody cares)
Nobody cares like a bear
"Too...much...joy!" TFS Turles said as he blew up, along with the Christmas Tree of Might.
"Yeah, I thought so," Mew said. "But, hey, it seems to work since Kim and Jason both decide to care about others. ...If that's what it takes, wonder why no one did that with people who cause wars to happen. Better yet, why not help people who desperately need to know that people care for them?" Mew asked only for random Ledians to start booing him.
"Just asking. Just asking." Mew defended.
"So while that happens, The evil book, simply known as The Spirit, attempts to wake up Nicholas just by saying his name." Mew said.
"And no, we don't know her backstory, her name or even her motivation for doing the things she does, she just The Spirit and she does things. And you wanna know why?" Mew asked.
"Just Cause! 3." Renegade For Life(AKA TFS Vegeta) said as the video zoomed in on the title card for Just Cause 3.
"...Why is it that the Renegade For Life and Two Saiyans Play is much more funnier than Dragon Ball Z Abridged?" Mew asked.
"Anyways, as soon as Nicholas wakes up, we get this interaction," Mew said.
The Spirit: Nicholas?
Nicholas slowly wakes up and looks at the book, dazed before remembering what happened.
Nicholas: Who are you? How do you know my name?
"Finally, someone asks the right question first." Mew said with a small grin.
The Spirit: I am a spirit, Nicholas. Your friend. I know many things. (Nicholas gasps) Almost everything.
Nicholas got himself out from the trunk.
Nicholas: Everything?
The Spirit: I know how you can earn more friends.
Nicholas: Really? How?
The Spirit: With magic.
Nicholas: Magic?
"Sorry, Spirit, we're all fresh out of magic kids. Hogwarts likes to keep them all to themselves to kill off-I mean, to educate them. Surely, they would never let kids die on their school grounds and then decide not to close the school for some reason. That's insane," Mew jokes.
"Well, no, that's not the type of magic she's talking about. Good thing too, or else Nicholas would've been killed during the Battle of Hogwarts." Mew said before looking at the camera. "What? It could happen!" He defended himself.
"No, the magic she's talking about is the power to be better than Mr. Fetuccini and Nicholas can gain it by unlocking the book." Mew said before looking thoughtful.
"Hmm, on one paw, he might unleash all sorts of things from the Unknown dimension and possibly kill everyone. But on the other paw, he'll be stuck with Mr. Fetuccini, the worst person ever. Hmm, Nicholas, I think you should unlock the book. After all, magic is the only thing that can cure your loneliness." Mew suggested.
Nicholas slowly approached the book, prepared to turn the key.
Tenderheart Bear(still under the dressing table): No, don't!
Nicholas turned the key, unlocking the book. The Spirit turned around, blasting Nicholas backwards in a sea of green magic. As he hit the wall, the key laid under his hand, forgotten.
"Judgement Day is upon us!" Mew said with maniacal laughter as a lightning strike.
"That's what people said about 2012 and look at how well that turned out, sir." Regirock said.
"Regirock, stop ruining my moments!" Mew shouted while flailing around in a cute manner.
"See, you look so cute when you do that." Regirock said.
"STOP CALLING ME CUTE!" Mew protested, his voice went a pitch higher than normal, making his voice sound, well, cute.
"It's alright to be cute, Mew," Regice said, appearing out of nowhere.
Mew spent the next couple of minutes just screaming in a cute manner.
A few moments later
"Sorry for that stupid filler. I got it handled," Mew said with a smile as some random creepy laughter played in the background.
"Anyways, The Spirit gets Nicholas to do a bunch of spells, including knocking out Mr. Fetuccini. ...Are we sure The Spirit is the villain, because she just helped get rid of a Mr. Fetuccini, worst magician and care-giver ever. Heck, she's even helping Nicholas with his life." Mew said.
"But of course, Tenderheart attempts to talk some reason into Nicholas," Mew adds.
Tenderheart: Nicholas, stop! This isn't the way to make friends.
Nicholas: Who are you?
Tenderheart: I'm Tenderheart, a Care Bear. Your friend.(Makes his way towards Nicholas and The Spirit)
The Spirit: Friend? Where was he when you needed him?
Tenderheart jumped onto the desk and gave The Spirit a firm look.
Tenderheart: What matters is, I'm here now, when Nicholas needs me the most.
"Wow, I just enjoyed Nicholas's reaction during the scene. It's like, 'Wow, I never thought this would happen in my life. A talking bear talking down to a face in a book. Thank God it's Thursday.'
"Anyways, The Spirit throws Tenderheart in a cage using magic, convincing Nicholas that magic is the solution to your problems." Mew said.
Tenderheart: Magic isn't the answer, Nicholas. Your feelings can help you find the true answer.
The Spirit: Don't listen to him!
"Yeah, Nicholas, don't listen to the talking bear. Listen to the talking book." Mew said, only for another tomato to hit him in the face.
"Oh, come on! I didn't even make a joke that time!" Mew protested.
"I know. I just wanted to throw something." The Ledian from before said with a shrug, before flying off.
"I'm starting to regret telling them about how people throw stuff at critics just because of something they don't like," Mew grumbled, wiping the tomato off his face.
"As soon as Nicholas and The Spirit leave, Tenderheart frees himself from the cage and chases after them to the magic show. Said magic show, where The Spirit embarrasses Nicholas in front of everyone, without anyone realizing. ...Well, now I see how she's a villain," Mew said.
"Oh, do you?!" Registeel asked sarcastically, having been annoyed with Mew praising The Spirit.
"Uh, yeah. Um, want some enchiladas later?" Mew asked nervously.
"...Maybe," Registeel said after a moment before going back to operate the cameras.
"Remember folks, don't annoy Registeel. He's like Crazy Steve, but only a tiny bit crazier." Mew whispered.
"Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah, Nicholas's humiliation at the hands of The Spirit, and he doesn't know it." Mew said.
Nicholas: And now The Amazing Nicholas will pull a dove out of his hat.
The crowd watched in wonder as Nicholas put his hand into the hat. However, The Spirit let out a chuckle as she used her magic to make water shoot out, spraying Nicholas in the face, causing the kids to laugh.
At that moment, Tenderheart ran in, only to see Nicholas slipping, causing the kids to laugh even harder.
"And when Nicholas attempts to plead to The Spirit to get the kids to stop laughing at him, she tells him to do it himself, via a spell. And so, faced with public humiliation and being friendless for life, or listening to an evil face in the book...which option did you think Nicholas chose? Hint: it doesn't involve losing something that can allow him to do anything. And it's all thanks to one kid." Mew said.
Random kid: Come on! Make us laugh.
The Spirit: One they'll never forget.
Nicholas glared down at the laughing kids before glancing at The Spirit's book and began reading the spell.
Nicholas: Zimmer zot, raknee tut…
Tenderheart(Running towards the stage): Nicholas, no!
Nicholas: ...cansorthe ne!
Lightning struck as the spell had been cast. The kids, who had been laughing at Nicholas only a seconds ago, now glared at each other, turned into complete and utter jerks.
"Oh no, he turned them into YouTube commenters." Mew said, before a bunch of negative comments and comments that are off-topic of whatever video/post on YouTube started popping up next to him.
"Scratch that. He's making the YouTube comment section! Ahhh!" Mew screamed, being buried under the amount of comments.
"Ew, I'm buried under all the inappropriate comments," Mew complained.
The Spirit(She and Nicholas are escaping via a magic green tornado: This is only the beginning!
Tenderheart: This is a job for all the Care Bears.
"So while Tenderheart makes his way back to Care-A-Lot, the other Care Bears, Kim and Jason, are playing games. However, just as Wish Bear is about to tell the two kids some good news about...something, everyone notices Tenderheart's rainbow-roller is out of control and drops him. Good thing he has a parachute in the form of big, heart-shaped balloons." Mew said.
Tenderheart: Quick, run for cover! It's coming! Brace yourselves!
Friend Bear: What's coming?
An earthquake happened soon after, knocking everyone off their feets and causing all the buildings to crack.
"That's why, folks, we don't ask questions when someone tells us to do something. We just do it. And after that, they noticed that the Caring Meter is dropping," Mew said.
Funshine Bear: Tenderheart! The Caring Meter dropped two whole points!
Everyone gasped as they saw the Caring Meter drop down by two points.
"We're reaching Jersey levels. Jer-Nah, that's too easy." Mew said, before coming up with something else.
"We're reaching Steven Universe levels! Steven Universe levels!" Mew exclaimed dramatically.
Before another tomato hit Mew in the face, he grabbed it with his psychic powers and threw it to the side.
"You know, people and Pokémon can have their opinions about stuff, too, you know! And if I want to say negative things about Steven Universe, regardless of what you all think, then deal with it, because I'm not changing my opinions." Mew said firmly.
"Anyways, the kids soon find out the good news Wish Bear wanted to tell them: they're gonna get adopted. However, they decide to help out the Care Bears with saving the world, since the Care Bears helped them share their feelings." Mew said.
Tenderheart(Giving Jason the key to The Spirit's book): Hold on to this for me, Jason. Don't lose it. It's very important.
Jason(Puts the key in his pockets): Don't worry, Tenderheart, I wouldn't lose it for nothing.
"Not trying to be mean to Jason, since I have seen kids do some incredible feats. Heck, most Trainers are kids. But, why don't Tenderheart hold onto the key if it's important?" Mew asked, before brushing it off.
"No matter, they're going back via rainbow beams." Mew said with a smile, before it slowly left his face. "At least, that's what should've happened." Mew added.
Kim, Jason, Friend Bear and Secret Bear disappeared in the beams of rainbow, heading away from Care-A-Lot towards Earth.
Tenderheart: All right, Champ Bear and Funshine, you're next!
Suddenly, another earthquake happened, causing everyone to fall down to the ground once more. However, the thing that took damage this time was the Rainbow Rescue Beam.
Grumpy Bear: Oh, no! The Rainbow Rescue Beam's jammed! They never made it to Earth.
Tenderheart Bear: What do you mean? Where are they?
Grumpy Bear: They're lost somewhere between here and Earth.
"Wait, somewhere between Earth and Care-A-Lot? Great, they're probably in purgatory, given how people compare this place to Heaven. I'm not making that part up, either," Mew said.
"So the only other option left to do? Follow a river in the sky. It just makes sense!" Mew said.
MRr Cherrywood(Narrating as the Care Bears, excluding Grumpy Bear, Good Luck Bear, Grams Bear, Hugs and Tugs, sailed off down the river): No one in Care-a-lot had ever followed the river. They had no idea whether it would lead them to Kim, Jason, and the missing Care Bears, or to nowhere at all.
"Yeah, because that's the best way to find missing kids and Care Bears: getting yourself lost! Thanks, Care Bears, we hardly knew you!" Mew mock-saluted.
"At the same time, Kim, Jason, Friend Bear and Secret Bear get dropped off in the middle of a forest. On tree branches. High off the gro-how is this safe again?" Mew asked, reading the manual for the Rainbow Rescue Beam.
"But wait, it gets better, because a lion is climbing up a tree." Mew said.
Friend Bear: Secret Bear says not to worry about falling. *Secret Bear whispers into her ear* Worry about the lion instead.
Kim, Jason, and Friend Bear: Lion?
Kim: What are we going to do?
"Um, scream and hope the noise will scare him away?" Mew suggested.
Friend Bear: Close your eyes. Maybe he won't see us.
Friend Bear and Secret Bear closed their eyes for a few seconds.
"Are you sure it would be that he won't see you, or that you don't want to see him maul you all?" Mew asked.
Friend Bear and Secret Bear opened their eyes, revealing no lion.
Friend Bear: See? He's gone.
"...Guess Rowley Jefferson is right after all. Greg, you should listen to him more often." Mew said, before throwing what he said off the side of the Tree of Beginning.
"No, just kidding about that. The lion is above them, trying to help them?" Mew said, dumbfounded.
"Of course, the branch snaps under their weight and, despite a monkey trying to catch them, he falls with them. Luckily for everyone, the ground is made out of clouds." Mew said as someone in the background shouted, "YAY!"
Brave Heart Lion: Everyone in the Forest of Feelings knows of Playful Heart Monkey and Brave Heart Lion.
"After some introductions are made, we burst into our next musical number, 'Home Is In Your Heart', sung by the cast. And I get the message of the song is good, but...it sucks. And I'm not talking about that bee scene" Mew said as the entire world booed at him.
"I know, I know. How can I hate this song? I mean, it's a great message for kids about home being in your heart, given lyrics like this," Mew said, showing an example.
Everyone: *Everyone ran around a pole, tying ribbons around its base* Forest of Feelings, Care-a-lot
And earth are the homes we claim
Loving each other
What we've got are places with a different name
But they're all the same
*Everyone slid down a cloud slide* Forest of Feelings, Care-a-lot
And earth are the homes we claim (Right here with you, my friend)
Forest of Feelings, Care-a-lot
And earth are all the same (We are all the same)
"But what about people who don't have homes and they're watching this? Wouldn't this be a slap in the face to them? Not trying to be a downer at this party, just pointing something out." Mew said.
"Anyways, as Brave Heart and Playful decides to help Kim, Jason and the two Care Bears find a way out of the Forest of Feelings, we cut back to The Spirit and Nicholas, who just now realize that Kim and Jason are the only two kids who weren't affected by the spell from earlier, sparing them from becoming YouTube commenters." Mew said.
Nicholas: There! The spell is cast. Now everyone in town will know the loneliness they've made me feel.
The Spirit: Not quite. Look! *Uses magic to show an image of Kim, Jason, Friend Bear, Secret Bear, Brave Heart and Playful Heart in the cauldron* These two small children still care very much about everyone, except you.
Nicholas: But they were to fall under my spell.
The Spirit: Ah, but those-those soft little bears shield them from your spells with their love and caring.
"Nicholas is willing to let them go, since he got his payback on the entire town of Manhattan...wait, the Caring Meter dropped over one city? I would've believed it if it was half the country, but one city? That's a bit extreme, don't you think?" Mew asked, staring up at the skies.
"Pushing past that minor detail, The Spirit emotionally manipulates Nicholas to keep going down this path, due to everyone else in the world still cares. Plus, she tells him that if the others come, they'll be coming to take him down. Terrified of that, Nicholas listens to the Spirit and casts another spell," Mew said.
Nicholas: Meeboo, weeboo. Tic, toc. Weeboo, zeeboo. Zip, zap, zot!
A face appeared in the cauldron, which glowed purple, as it spewed out, causing Nicholas to scream.
"Congratulations, Nicholas, you unleashed the purple fart gas of doom. Now all the fart jokes will never end. Said fart joke gets sent by The Spirit to go after the kids to teach them a lesson," Mew said.
Nicholas: But isn't there another way?
The Spirit: No! They must be taught a lesson! A lesson for the children. A lesson for the town! A lesson for everyone.
Nicholas: What do you mean, "everyone"?
The Spirit(ignoring Nicholas's questions): Now go! *The spells goes off to find the kids*
Nicholas: You said, "a lesson." What kind of lesson?
The Spirit: Never mind that. You must now collect the ingredients for your next spell.
"Surely that's not ominous in any way." Mew said sarcastically.
"So while that happens, the other Care Bears arrived at the Forest of Feelings. ...So that's where the river leads to. Wonder why they never thought to go down it," Mew said.
Wish Bear: There's nothing ahead to tell us where we are, Tenderheart.
Love-A-Lot Bear: Bear overboard! *Wish Bear turned around to see which Care Bear fell overboard, only to narrowly avoid falling off herself* Bedtime Bear went to sleep and fell overboard. Look! *Love-A-Lot Bear points at the part of the river that was bubbling, the exact spot where Bedtime Bear fell overboard*
"Oh, there's a reason why. Forget I said anything, then," Mew said.
"Luckily for them, a penguin helps them out by saving Bedtime Bear from drowning and brings him back to the ship.
Love-A-Lot Bear: Oh, thank you very much. I'm sure Bedtime Bear will thank you, too, when he wakes up *Love-A-Lot Bear and Wish Bear put Bedtime Bear gently on the floor of the ship*
Cozy Heart Penguin: No thanks needed. I'm Cozy Heart Penguin. Helping someone in need is what warms my heart and keeps me cozy.
"Only $9.99! Buy him now! Prod your parents, annoy them and scream until they break down and finally give you one! Remember, owning Cozy Heart Penguin is more important than breathing!" Mew said, sounding like a cheesy ad.
However, The Spirit's spell decides to attack the Care Bears' ship, attempting to drown them in a whirlpool. And how does it do that? By taking the form of a fish." Mew said, looking unimpressed.
Lotsa Heart Elephant(off-screen): A rope! Throw me a rope!
Cozy Heart Penguin: Do as she says!
"Yeah, because I usually listen to random voices telling me to throw them a rope without making sure they're friend or foe." Mew said.
"Of course, it pays off for them since the mysterious voice pulls them out of the whirlpool. And if that being can pull a ship out when helping people, I don't want to get on said being's bad side." Mew said.
Elephant trumpets can be heard, causing Love-A-Lot Bear and Champ Bear to hug each other in fear.
Cozy Heart Penguin: May I introduce the strongest, most fearsome creature in the entire Forest of Feelings. Lotsa Heart Elephant.
Lotsa Heart Elephant(Popping out from the trees): Hello.
"Well, that's as much weirdness as I can handle. I'll be back after the commercials," Mew said, going off to the sides.
"Commercials!" Registeel shouted as the commercials started playing.
(Instrumentals of the theme song plays in the background)
This episode is sponsored by the Pokémon League
"Want to prove that you're the best of the best?" A random voice asked as the Indigo League popped out of the black screen.
"Then enter the Indigo League! Show everyone you got what it takes by earning 8 Kanto Gym Badges and competing in the League, until only the best Trainer is the winner!"
A montage of Pokémon Battles took up the screen, showing the various skills and strategies Trainers and Pokémon used in various battles.
"Enter today, and prove you have what it takes!"
The screen fades back to black.
(Instrumentals of the theme song plays in the background)
"So while the Care Bears and their new friends go off to find Kim, Jason and the two missing Care Bears, we cut back to the others as they plan to rest. However, the spell decides to go the Evil Dead route by taking control of a tree to kidnap the kids. So hope it doesn't go the other route," Mew said, disturbed by the context.
The spell went inside the tree everyone was under, bringing it to life. Leering down at them with its glowing yellow eyes, the tree slowly moved a tree branch-like arm towards the kids.
Playful Heart Monkey: While Brave Heart's gone, let's play a guessing game. *Does a pose for everyone to guess* What am I? *Looks up and notices the evil tree, causing him to gasp. He then start sputtering incoherently as he tried to get everyone to look behind them, but they think it's part of the game*
Kim: Gee, I don't know.
Playful Heart Monkey(After getting a hold of himself for a moment): Look out!
However, his warning came too late as Kim and Jason were grabbed by the evil tree.
"And everyone's attempts to help the children all result in them getting grabbed by the tree or slapped away. Even Brave Heart isn't immune to this treatment," Mew pointed out.
Brave Heart Lion ran back to the others, only to see what was going on.
Brave Heart Lion: Oh no.
Kim and Jason(Shouting at the evil tree): Let us go!
Brave Heart Lion: Charge!
Brave Heart Lion ran to the tree, planning on saving the kids, only to be slapped aside by the tree.
"Wow. That was an epic fail. I'm sure Ridiculousness would have a category for that." Mew said.
A fail caption appears over the scene where Brave Heart Lion got knocked aside by the evil tree.
"Nice," Registeel nodded his approval, putting on sunglasses...for some reason.
"Anyways, they get saved by a deus ex machina. In this case, Swift Heart Rabbit." Mew said.
Swift Heart Rabbit started zipping around, chewing through tree branches, allowing Brave Heart to catch Friend Bear, Secret Bear, Kim and Jason and causing the tree to be tangled up in its own tree branches.
"And the spell leaves the tree. Just like that. Wish all evil beings give up that easily," Mew said.
"So, while the kids, the two Care Bears, and their three new friends go off to find the way out, the others on the ship goes into a pitch dark cave, where they're as blind as Zubats." Mew said.
Bright Heart Raccoon(Voice): Steer to the left!
Tenderheart Bear: Who said that?
"I'm just as confused as you are. Weird that we agree on something for once," Mew said.
Bright Heart Raccoon(Voice): It was me! I said it!
Tenderheart Bear: Who are you?
Bright Heart Raccoon(Voice): Don't ask questions. Steer left quick!
"I don't like your attitude, whoever you are. I think we're just gonna continue going str-Ahh! We hit a rock and are sinking! Oh, this would've been prevented if you told us who you were, random cave voice!" Mew said, wearing a sailor's outfit, as his ship began sinking and the voice of panicking Care Bears were in the background.
"You know, they say a good captain always goes down with their ship. Good thing I'm not a good captain...or a captain at all," Mew said, jumping off the ship before pushing the joke aside.
"Okay, they didn't sink. They listened to the voice and went left, exiting the cave. And the voice is revealed to be a raccoon." Mew said.
Tenderheart Bear: A raccoon? No wonder you could see in the dark.
Lotsa Heart Elephant: Not just a raccoon. Bright Heart Raccoon.
Bright Heart Raccoon: I can usually see my way through anything.
"Oh, sorry that I was rude and didn't introduce you earlier. I thought to let you do it in a humble way." Mew said sarcastically.
Wish Bear: Waterfall ahead!
Everyone was shocked about that news, including Bright Heart Raccoon.
Well, you didn't see your way through that, did ya?" Mew asked.
"And no, they didn't go off the waterfall. The Care Bears use their belly badges to make balloons to allow the ship to float towards the direction that the missing kids, Care Bears and the other three are at.
"Speaking of them, wonder how they're doing?" Mew asked.
Kim, Jason, Friend Bear, Secret Bear, Swift Heart, Playful Heart and Brave Heart were walking down the path until a huge shadow passed them by.
Brave Heart Lion: Oh no!
The others gasped as the shadow turned out to be the spell, transforming into a giant bird.
"Yeah, I thought so. Oh, and Brave Heart tries to have a boxing match with the evil bird. For those who want to know the victor, watch the following scene. For those who already know, too bad and watch the scene!" Mew said.
Brave Heart put his fists up, attempting to punch the evil bird. However, the bird hit harder, causing Brave Heart to spin in the air before falling onto the ground.
"You know, just because you have 'brave' in your name doesn't mean you're capable of beating evil spells in different forms," Mew deadpanned.
Another fail caption popped up, this time showing Brave Heart spinning in the air after he got hit by the evil bird.
"So of course, the evil bird manages to trap the kids in a ravine, where no one will be able to get to them on time. The only option to save them?" Mew asked.
Friend Bear: Our only hope is a Care Bear Stare. I just hope it works. There's only two of us.
"So they tried that. And, well, you can see the results for yourself," Mew said.
Friend Bear: Care Bears stare!
Friend Bear and Secret Bear used the Care Bear Stare on the evil bird. However, it's not enough to dispel it as it managed to get out of the way.
"Guess I won't be saying 'Chomp the Rainbow!', then." Mew said, a bit miffed at the evil bird for ruining his fun.
Suddenly a fail caption appeared over Mew.
"I hate you, evil bird." Mew grumbled out.
Suddenly, the evil bird got hit by a much stronger version of the Care Bear Stare coming from behind a rock.
Friend Bear: Look!
She pointed at the area where the Care Bear Stare was coming from, which turned out to be the cloudship.
"I think Doug Walkers got this one," Mew said, pulling out the joke.
"TASTE THE RAINBOW, MOTHERFUCKERS!"
Friend Bear: Care Bears stare!
With renewed hope, Friend Bear and Secret Bear added their own Care Bear Stare into the combined Care Bear Stare, allowing it to dispel the evil bird, and the spell, once and for all.
"Welp, screw caring. The answer to this problem was violence. Wonderful, sweet, caring violence." Mew joked.
"And of course, since the kids want their new friends to come with them, Brave Heart and Lotsa Heart call everyone else in the Forest of Feelings. And you wanna know why? Not only for another musical number, this one is 'When You Care, You're Not Afraid to Try', but also so we can have more merchandise to sell. As if we don't have enough to sell anyways." Mew said.
"So as they go off back to Earth, The Spirit attempts to convince Nicholas to murder Kim and Jason. Yes, you read this right. She attempts to convince him to murder children." Mew said with wide eyes of horror.
The Spirit: They're on their way.
Nicholas(Waking up, gasping and looking everywhere): Here?
The Spirit: You'll be ready for them.
Nicholas(Walking up to the cauldron): How?
The Spirit: By completing your final spell.
Nicholas: Final spell?
The Spirit: Yes. You must gather the elements quickly. When those two children arrive, they must be all that is left of caring in this world.
Nicholas(Catching on to what The Spirit wants him to do): You don't mean…
The Spirit: Yes! Everyone must be taught the lesson.
Nicholas: But…
The Spirit(Uses magic on Nicholas to influence him): Don't you see, Nicholas? It's too late to stop now. You must finish what you started! There's no turning back!
The Spirit and Nicholas soon started laughing evilly.
"The sad thing is, even without The Spirit controlling Nicholas, he might have eventually come down to this option by himself. Face it, everyone. As you have seen, what else does Nicholas have to lose at this point? Friends he doesn't even have? A rotten life? Man, you have to feel bad for Nicholas, given he is probably doing this because, to him, he has no options left." Mew said.
"However, we can be bothered with the sad stuff for long, because our heroes just arrived at the carnival/fairgrounds...whatever it is, they're back on Earth!" Mew said as random cheering can be heard in the background.
"And what do they do? Split up like they're the Mystery Inc. Because that's the best way to deal with something like this. Oh, and we get to see that key again," Mew points out.
Everyone was heading off towards different directions. Jason was about to join them until Tenderheart said his name.
Tenderheart Bear: Jason, do you still have the key that I gave you?
Jason put his hand on his chin before searching his overall pockets. Luckily for him and Tenderheart, he pulled out the key.
Jason: Sure do.
Tenderheart Bear: Good. Now, promise me you and Kim will stay as far away from Nicholas and the spirit as you can.
Jason: But I want to help.
Tenderheart Bear: You can help best by guarding that key.
Jason: B-But…
Tenderheart Bear: If we lose that key, Jason, we can never win.
Jason: I understand, Tenderheart. *Put the key in his pockets* You can count on me.
"You know, I wonder. Why would Tenderheart allow Jason to hold onto the key that's meant to lock away The Spirit and let Kim and Jason help him and the Care Bears out with this, but won't let them get near The Spirit nor Nicholas? And yes, we know the reason why Kim and Jason shouldn't be near Nicholas and The Spirit, but the characters shouldn't. What, did Tenderheart read the script on the way to the Forest of Feelings or did he read it on the way to Manhattan?" Mew questioned.
"So, we get to see Nicholas collecting ingredients for the final spell, which include the following: rotten apple core, spider webs and cigarette butts. And for those of you who think adults were smoking, may I remind you which age group were mostly at the fairground when Nicholas cast his spell? And you don't think so, remember Pleasure Island. That'll ruin your pleasant thoughts for awhile." Mew said.
"However, soon Kim and Jason ran into Nicholas and ran into a funhouse to escape him, as the song, 'Look Out! He's After You' begins playing. Though can you call it a song when people are telling you things in a hushed voice within the first couple of seconds?" Mew asked.
Oh, no! Run away! Hurry up! Look out! Run away! Get away! Oh, dear! Watch out!
"Okay, okay, we heard you. No need to repeat yourselves!" Mew scolded.
"Anyways, the Care Bears and their Forest of Feelings friends managed to keep Kim and Jason safe, but they didn't plan on Nicholas finding the last ingredient for his spell: old bubble gum." Mew said with a flat expression.
Nicholas: Icky, sticky bubble gum! The last ingredient I need for my final spell. *Puts the gum in the bag full of other ingredients*
"I'm sorry. Can you repeat that one more time?" Mew asked, in disbelief.
Nicholas: Icky, sticky bubble gum! The last ingredient I need for my final spell. *Puts the gum in the bag full of other ingredients*
"..." Mew sat there in silence.
Jon: (quietly) All my life, leading up to this moment...has been Worth It. Every last second. I am truly blessed. BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! I'm sorry! WHAT'S THAT? Oh that's just the "You Can't Make This Shit Up" Alarm!
(the clock's face reads LOL SRSLY?)
Jon: GET OUT OF MY BRAIN! (smashes the alarm and the stool it's on with a sledgehammer)
"THE WORLD GOT SCREWED OVER BY BUBBLE GUM?!" Seriously, what lesson do we take from this? 'Remember, kids, to prevent bubble gum from being used in evil spells, either throw it in the trash or swallow it.' Except that's really DUMB! I mean, we just show that Nicholas is willing to do anything, including digging around trash, just to get these ingredients. Meaning the only option is to swallow the gosh darn gums! Except that's also stupid since everyone and their grandparents have been told not to swallow the gum! So what lesson is learned from this?!" Mew ranted, thrashing the room for a solid ten minutes.
Jon: *Plays over Mew wrecking his room* AND IIIIIIIII—HOLY SHIT!—WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU—I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME, GODDAMMIT, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!
"Okay, I'm calm. I think," Mew admitted, as Regirock was horrified by the mess.
"Mew, how many times do I have to tell you? If you're gonna wreck the room, at least mess it up in a way that I can clean it up in a couple of hours, not a few days." Regirock said in a shaky tone.
"Anyways, as the Forest of Feelings critters goes off to find Kim and Jason, the two kids Tenderheart didn't want near Nicholas and The Spirit but now do for some reason," Mew gave the audience a 'WTF' look, "the Care Bears goes off to try and stop Nicholas and The Spirit from casting the final spell. However their very presence distracts Nicholas long enough for The Spirit to cause him to drop the gum into the cauldron, enacting the spell." Mew said.
Tenderheart Bear(Running towards Nicholas): Nicholas!
Nicholas(Pulling his cape over his face): You're too late. Too late!
"I have officially summoned a demon! Not the one that stole warriors' souls until a samurai wielding a magic sword beat him. He totally sucks." Mew said in an imitation of Nicholas's voice.
"Mew, we have a problem," Regice said, pointing at something behind Registeel, who turned behind him and was scared speechless. He even pulled out a random scene to convey his fears.
Mordecai: Holy crap, it's real!
Mew sighed before turning his attention towards the demon. "Joe, for the last time, stop going for the obvious scares." Mew said.
Everyone stared at him in stunned disbelief, before Joe the demon punched him in the face and flew off, cackling like a maniac.
"Why do we even keep him around?" Mew asked, putting an ice pack to his face.
"Even I'm not sure...and I'm usually the one who likes weird stuff." Registeel said.
"Anyways, the Care Bears attempt to use the Care Bear Stare on Nicholas to make him care, which almost works. Almost being the key word, because The Spirit foil their attempts and send them back outside.
Cozy Heart Penguin: What happened in there?
Share Bear: The Care Bear Stare didn't work! The spirit's power is too strong!
Tenderheart Bear: Brave Heart, where are Kim and Jason?
Brave Heart Lion: We can't find them anywhere.
Love-A-Lot Bear: Uh-oh. Look!
The Spirit and Nicholas slowly exit the castle via the rollercoaster.
Cozy Heart Penguin: Nicholas?
Nicholas(In a raspy voice): Where are they?
"Where is who?" Mew asked, a smug smirk on his face.
The Spirit snarled as she used her magic.
Suddenly, Mew was hit by green lightning, causing his whole body to look like it was charcoaled before falling to the ground, whimpering in pain.
Jon: I have fallen, and I choose NOT to get up!
Mew painfully pulled himself back up.
"So of course the Care Bears attempt to stare him down again, while the Forest of Feelings critters decide to, um, well…" Mew trailed off.
Brave Heart Lion: Everybody call!
The Forest of Feelings critters all did their respective animal noises, using the 'call' to try and help the Care Bears.
"You know, this isn't really helping. I mean, maybe if you can make peace signs, or maybe try and grab The Spirit or some-" Mew began, before seeing that they were continuing the 'call'."Yeah, this is pointless." Mew said, disappointed.
A last fail caption appears over the Forest of Feelings critters doing the 'call'.
"However, when things are getting terrible, Kim and Jason arrive to be heroes," Mew said.
Kim and Jason ran past the Care Bears and the Forest of Feelings critters towards Nicholas and The Spirit.
Tenderheart Bear: Kim, Jason, no!
The Spirit: It's them! It's the children.
Nicholas looks at everyone and everything with spiraling, black and white eyes.
"Hey, Carlos De Vil, I think I found your older brother." Mew joked lamely, laughing nervously before sobbing a bit.
Jason: Nicholas! We care about you. We used to be like you. We thought nobody cared.
Kim: But we were wrong. Now we want to be your friends, Nicholas, and make sure you're never alone again. Believe us, Nicholas, believe us.
Nicholas(Breaking free of The Spirit's control): I-I-I believe you.
"Wow, Kim and Jason managed to do the very things the Care Bears couldn't. They're magic! Witchcraft!" Mew shouted as everyone's minds blew up.
"So of course, Nicholas gets the willpower to care and starts trying to seal off The Spirit back into her book, but when everyone is about to use the key, she vaporizes it." Mew said.
Tenderheart(Helping Nicholas keep the book closed): Hold on, Nicholas.
Secret Bear ran towards the book, Nicholas, Tenderheart, Kim and Jason. Using her belly badge, she made a new key, which Jason quickly used to lock the book, ending the threat of The Spirit.
"...Excuse me, what? What is this? Who made it and why?" Mew asked, pissed off.
"Is this the reason why Tenderheart didn't want Kim and Jason near The Spirit and Nicholas? Because he didn't want them to know that the key can be duplicated at any given moment? What, did he feel like the knowledge of duplicating the key would make them feel any less important? If so, shame on you, Care Bears, for doing this!" Mew ranted.
"Anyways, Nicholas remembers Mr. Fetuccini was stuck under the sleeping curse and goes off to free him from it, only for the latter to be awake." Mew said.
Mr. Fetuccini: It's showtime!
Nicholas: Mr. Fetuccini! I'm sorry.
Mr. Fetuccini: Nicholas, I just had the most wonderful dream. *Chuckles* Now it'll read: "Fetuccini and Nicholas." So what do you say, huh? A partnership.
Nicholas: A part- A part...
"And the fact you put your name first is making us regret breaking that sleeping spell on you," Mew said.
Mr. Fetuccini: Oh, all right. "Nicholas and Fetuccini."
"Better." Mew said with a smile.
"And so, everyone lives happily ever after. The Care Bears bring their new friends to be part of the family as Care Bear Cousins or something, Nicholas does magic shows, and Kim and Jason are happily adopted by their new parents." Mew said with a bright smile.
Mr. Cherrywood: Now they'll never know what eventually became of Nicholas. I guess all they need to know is that he, too, lived happily ever after. Happier than I ever thought I could be.
"Yeah, kinda figured that out sometime ago. I mean, your hair looks exactly like Nicholas, the fact that Mrs. Cherrywood looks exactly like Kim, and the fact you know everything, despite seemingly not being there yourself. Which means Kim and Jason told Nicholas their side of the adventure sometime after the Care Bears left, but before Mr. Fetuccini woke up." Mew guess, before realizing what he's doing.
"Nope, I'm not making theories for this franchise. I'm just glad that Nicholas had some happiness in his life." Mew said with a smile.
Mrs. Cherrywood: Nicholas, these children should have been in bed ages ago. What am I ever going to do with you?
Mr. Cherrywood: Care for me, Mrs. Cherrywood. Just care for me.
Tenderheart, looking through the window, giggles before disappearing in a burst of sparkles. He then flew a Cloud-mobile towards a giant heart.
Suddenly, all the Care Bears and Care Bear Cousins appear in front of the heart, waving to the audience, as the movie ends.
"And that was The Care Bears Movie. And what's my opinion? While I don't like this film, much less this franchise, that doesn't mean I hate it. I can see why people enjoy these disgustingly nice creatures, and I can see why this did beat The Black Cauldron.
"Plus, while there are a few things about the movie that are questionable, at least it did bring back the interest in doing animated films when Hollywood was about to stop doing that." Mew said.
"While it's strange to praise Care Bears of all things, I don't feel bad for doing so. Hopefully, I don't regret that. I'm the Critical Mew, and I review these contents so you don't have to." Mew said, going off to do something fun.
"Finally, he did an unbiased review!" Registeel said.
"Yes. Hopefully, he'll do that for my request," Regice said.
"And that'll be?" Regirock asked, curious.
"If I tell, it won't be a surprise. Just wait for awhile, though." Regice said, whistling as he walked away.
Next time: Paladin Aku
Credits:
The New Scooby-Doo Mysteries
Wikipedia
Care Bears Wiki
Jontron Disney Bootlegs
TFS DBZA Christmas Tree of Might
Renegade For Life: Just Cause 3
Harry Potter series
The Army of Darkness
Nostalgia Critic: The Care Bears Movie
Samurai Jack
Jontron Banjo and Kazooie: Nuts and Bolts
(A/N: Despite this message coming out a bit too late, Happy 25th anniversary, Pokémon and all you fans out there, and here's hoping for another 25 years down the line!)