Before Kagome's brain could fully process the sharp pop, Inuyasha had already crashed to the ground beside her, blood droplets spattering her uniform and rapidly pooling beneath his downy head. A distant piercing wail she only belatedly recognized as coming from her own mouth, rose above the white roar filling her ears. Her hands flew to cradle his pallid face.

000

While the stunned group rushed to the side of the downed hanyou, further up the ridge, Deadpool collided with trees, rocks and debris as his body, along with numerous other loose objects, was pulled into a vortex which abruptly ceased right as his back crashed heavily into a cluster of jagged rocks. Before the merc had a chance to catch his breath (he was fairly certain one of his lungs was punctured by a broken rib) he found himself pinned against the stone by a bar pressed into his neck from behind.

Unable to see his assailant, the hitman reached across himself with the Glock he still clutched, firing it several times into the space between two rocks on his left side which he surmised to be his attacker's location. Apparently he missed; the pole cutting off his air only tightened. Wade slid the barrel of his gun into a gap between the rock and the bar and pushed against it with both hands and all his remaining strength.

Even as blackness filled his vision, the pressure against his throat lessened ever so slightly, providing him enough oxygen to double down his resistance. He managed several more gasps as the space continued to widen. He heard a grunt behind him, his adversary struggling to keep him pinned down, but with each ragged breath the mercenary quickly regained strength. Following a final, decisive thrust, the grip holding him in place suddenly broke.

Deadpool wheeled around, pistol aimed, to face his opponent. The monk of Inuyasha's group rapidly swung the staff he'd used to subdue him, knocking the weapon out of the gunman's hand with deft precision. Deadpool ducked under the second swipe from the metal rod.

"You seem to still be in fairly good shape even after the hit you took against those rocks; I was afraid the force from my wind tunnel might have banged you up too much," remarked the hoshi calmly.

"How about I ram that stick up your 'wind tunnel' sideways," suggested Deadpool.

He lunged at the younger man even as Miroku's staff struck him directly in his wounded thorax. Absorbing the blow without a flinch, the Weapon X dropout seized the pole, using it to shove the monk into the rock face behind him. The itinerate exorcist ducked down just in time to avoid being impaled by his own shakujo.

"Why are you doing this," demanded a baffled and slightly winded Miroku, "Are you actually teaming up with the people you came here to eliminate?"

"Yep. I'm on 'Team Eternal One' now," reported Deadpool. "...And yes, I'm already aware of how lame that sounded." He flung the monk's weapon away and pulled out his trench knife, thrusting it downward at his crouching opponent's heart.

Miroku rolled to the side, as the blade grazed his shoulder, kicking Wade's knee to knock his leg out from under him.

"I really don't like sucking people into my cursed hand," admitted the young fighter, putting much needed distance between himself and the mercenary, "I wish you wouldn't put me in this situation - but I can't allow you to harm my friends."

"That cursed hand?" Wade pointed to the brandished appendage wrapped in a rosary, "I can just chop that right off for you; no more curse." He pulled both swords from his back and stalked unfazed toward the holy man.

Miroku clutched reluctantly at his rosary, with nowhere left to retreat.

"Hiraikotsu!" the weapon of the same name suddenly flew up from the drop off behind the monk, sailing over his head and directly into Deadpool, before returning to Sango's grip. The young woman pulled herself the rest of the way up the hill, panting slightly but ready to go again. "What the hell are you doing, Mercenary," she demanded angrily, "why have you betrayed us?"

The merc pondered her question for a moment as he got unconcernedly back to his feet, "Dunno; guess I just came to my senses about how awesome Apocalypse is. Anyway, it's really thoughtful of you ass clowns to come up here and make my job easier rather than forcing me to chase you all down." He yanked a grenade off his belt and arched his arm back to lob it.

"Snap out of it, Wilson," a random kid suddenly shouted as he took the ledge beside the demon-slayer, hastily re-adjusting the kitty pajamas cutting into his crotch, "you're being controlled!"

The assassin's eyes narrowed at him, "Who the fuck are you," he asked, unknowingly parroting Inuyasha.

"Don't tell me you've forgotten how you robbed me blind," the ridiculous-looking boy snapped back.

Deadpool opened his mouth to reply, only abruptly remembering the grenade he still held. "Oh, shit."

"Get down," ordered the kid dressed for a slumber party to everyone around him. The the deafening boom immediately followed.

After an uncertain interval of oblivion, Deadpool slowly opened his eyes. He felt the now familiar sensation of being bound, with the slight difference that he was lying on the ground instead of against a tree, and his bonds were physically real rather than made with hoozie-doozie magic.

Scattered bits of shell littered the earth around him and (he discovered as he twisted his neck to look further) embedded themselves in the oversized boomerang held by the female demon-slayer who stood several paces away, staring flintily back at him. A moment later, her monk boyfriend stepped over to join her.

A blunt blow to his kidneys, as if from a hard kick, sent the large man rolling onto his back where he found himself gazing up into the scowling, bloodied face of Inuyasha. "So you're awake now, you rat-bastard?"

"Heeey," grinned Deadpool weakly, "did I shoot you? My bad."

"That's all you have to say to me," exploded the half-breed, his spittle flying into Wade's face.

"Ugh, I feel like I really tied one on," The bottom half of his mask having been shredded by shrapnel, Deadpool suddenly turned his head sideways and vomited a torrent of black blood onto the ground.

A pair of brown loafers rushed up as he retched. "Is he hemorrhaging," cried Kagome.

"Nope. No, just purging," Deadpool let out a loud belch, collapsing back into the dirt with a relieved sigh. "Hey, is there any way someone could untie me?"

"I don't know," the half-demon shot back, "only minutes ago, you were trying to kill us; how do we know you won't try again as soon as we let you go?"

"Because I puked up the blood! It wasn't me doing it - it was the blood of that S&M psycho-bitch!"

"Disgusting," the unknown boy in pj's remarked, his bare feet stepping carefully around the crimson rivulets in the dust as he walked up to the bound man, "I can't believe how much of that woman's blood you drank!"

Deadpool squinted back up at him. "And I can't believe you thought laser lemon was a good color on you. Although I will give you credit - whoever you are - I've never been able to find spandex that hugged every contour of my package quite as well as those pants do for you."

"Shut up," exclaimed the red faced youth, tugging the hem of his ruffled top down as low as it would go, "You have no idea what I've been through - I didn't ask you to drag me with you into this nightmare; I'd be sitting with Akane-san having tea right now if it weren't for you!"

"You'd be what - who are you?"

"Keh. It's P-chan. Don't you recognize him?" Inuyasha smirked.

"P-chan?" Deadpool turned incredulously to the hanyou, "What do you mean by saying this sad sack is P-chan?"

"Who are you calling P-chan," seethed the boy through gritted teeth, "My name is Hibiki Ryoga!"

"It's true, he really is P-chan," Shippo popped up from behind Kagome's shoulder, "we all watched him transform as soon as he had hot water poured on him."

"Ahhh, well that makes sense," Deadpool nodded slowly, "today is just handing me a soggy shit-sandwich of disappointment."

He then turned and offered the scowling Ryoga a plastered on smile, "Hey. Nice to meet you."

"I suppose we haven't met officially yet," huffed the oddly familiar teen, crossing his arms.

"Wait..." recognition slowly dawned on Deadpool, "Aren't you the weirdo I ask for directions to the Higurashi Shrine?"

"Looks who's calling who a weirdo!"

"Now I remember - the boy with no sense of direction! So you were the pig the whole time? I should have known when you lost your way trying to walk around a puddle - that's why I had to carry you everywhere."

"I hate you."

"Thanks for all the pop tarts!"

"Alright, enough of the happy reunion," Inuyasha interjected, ripping apart the bonds holding the mercenary with a swipe of his claws.

"Are you sure that's a good idea," remarked Sango, "the three of us could have been killed by his explosive if we hadn't shielded ourselves behind Hiraikotsu."

"And he did almost kill you too," added Shippo.

"No he didn't," scoffed Inuyasha, "Don't make me laugh!"

"Fortunately, it was just a graze," Kagome exhaled in weary relief.

Inuyasha directed his gaze at the now standing Wade, "Even if it wasn't, I still wouldn't have died from that - idiot!"

"Yeah, okay," snorted the other, "I guess we'll never know for sure." He then turned to face the monk he'd grappled with earlier. "No hard feelings. That was a pretty nifty strangling maneuver you used on me; it almost worked."

"You are truly a frightening opponent," Miroku responded with a slight bow.

"And hey, don't stop rocking that wind-thingy of yours," Deadpool gave his back a hearty slap, "keep on sucking, my man."

"It seems I have no choice," sighed the young priest.

Inuyasha abruptly and noisily cleared his throat, "Does anyone else here happen to remember that we were right in the middle of being attacked by a murderous cult that wants to take over the world? How about we start discussing something that actually matters - like what we're going to do to them now."

"Agreed," seconded Sango, in uncommon synchronicity with her loud-mouthed traveling companion, "but let's do it back at the campsite - I want to check on Kirara."

The campsite...

"Excuse me...pardon me," Wade navigated his way through the small, cramped shelter, plopping down in the non-existent space between Inuyasha and Kagome as the impromptu group meeting commenced.

"Hurry up and tell us what you've learned about those bastards in the past two days," demanded Inuyasha, yanking his jacket sleeve out from under the hitman and scooting back as much as he could.

Deadpool, however, leaned over in Kagome's direction. "Was that your hand on my ass," he whispered loudly.

The white-haired boy immediately stood and, reaching over Kagome, punched the top of the merc's head, "I said get on with it!"

"I'll let that slide this once since I already gave you a lobotomy with a bullet earlier," Deadpool side-eyed the dog-eared youth.

"Both of us have learned a good deal about the goings on at the palace," volunteered Ryoga from where he hunched in the corner directly behind Miroku and Sango. "I, for example, spent hours spying on the Daimyo's meetings one day. Even though it was a little difficult to hear everything from where I was hiding..."

"Are you talking about when you got lost in the closet and all the futons fell on top of you?" yawned Deadpool.

"I was wondering about the alleged miko who put you under a spell with her blood," Miroku, pivoted the conversation slightly, "Do you have any insight on her?"

"You mean like whether she's beautiful or has big breasts," muttered Sango.

"Now, why can't I ask a question about a woman without it having to do with sex," defended the monk, turning a placating smile on her.

"I don't know; you tell me."

"You know, that blood ability doesn't sound very much like a miko power to me," Kagome, quickly interjected.

Wilson shrugged, "It was definitely nasty, but not in a good way; kinda felt like I'd swallowed something alive that was squiggling around inside me. It was like a parasite took over my brain and spread all through my body...

"Now as far as her tits are concerned..."

"Nevermind!" groused Sango. She sat back and continued stroking the languishing Kirara. "I wonder if that power of hers has anything to do with how they grow the numbers of their group."

"But if that were the case," countered Miroku, "then how was our mercenary able to buck the spell so quickly? It seems a bit ineffective for that purpose."

"Truly, I am smarter than the average mercenary," nodded Deadpool sagely.

"No you're not," objected Inyasha.

"Oh yeah? Then I guess it's gotta be the jacked up healing factor; it usually punches that kind of biological-based shit right in the proverbial dick." Wade went silent a moment as he appeared to consider his own statement. "Come to think of it, that slutty little minx might just be a mutant."

"What's that," demanded Inuyasha, "someone like you?"

"Um, no... Are you calling me a slut? I mean someone like Apocalypse!"

"There are others like him," Kagome looked startled.

"Now don't worry, Kags, like I've been saying this entire fanfic, they're all sloppy seconds compared to the big A-face! But yeah, I'd say we can safely assume the front man of this entire outfit is a mutant too."

Kagome appeared confused at first, but quickly recalled something else she'd been told recently, "The Starling Lord we met - what he said about the of head of this group suddenly makes sense now!"

"How's that, Kagome-chan," asked Sango.

"He's not a demon, but he uses demonic energy," the Tokyo native glanced up at the man beside her, "Wade, do you think it's possible for that to be a mutant power somehow?"

He quirked an incredulous brow at her, "Flicking explosive boogers could be a mutant power (or maybe I'm thinking of a devil fruit power). But who's this 'Starling Lord'?"

"Some demon we met who spies on people using his birds and who likes shiny objects," Shippo offered helpfully.

"I wish we could meet him again," added Kagome, "I wonder if we could get any more information from him."

"Not to worry; I've collected a butt-load of that," Deadpool held up the small cube that was Cable's computer and tapped it slyly, "Anyone feel like pulling a coup with me?"

"I'm ready to go," Sango tightened her ponytail, "The poison used on Kirara is likely the handiwork of that wretched priestess - I'll personally extract the antidote from her myself!"

Inuyasha's fangs gleamed off a narrow shaft of sunlight slicing through the dim room, "I finally feel like we're making some progress; tell us how we get into this place."

"Well, I think I've figured something out," began Ryoga, "You see, I happened to notice a small breach in the garden wall while I was patrolling..."

"Computer, show the palace compound," Wade promptly ordered.

Everyone gaped in amazement as a detailed holographic image of the palace and surrounding village projected itself over the crowded interior of the shack.

"Oh. Well, that works too I guess," muttered the former pig.

"What's this," Miroku pointed at something near the bottom of the 3-D image.

"This," Deadpool swiped his finger to enlarge the area, "is a series of tunnels leading to different locations beneath the castle and through the town. There's also a system of caves where their hideout is located. I intercepted a message from there yesterday - the next village purge is already in the works."

"When," insisted Kagome, leaning around his ample bicep for a closer look.

"Let's just say any time now; I was already on my way here to warn you before I got tied up with Madam Blood Orgy.

"So, I'm thinking - and stay with me on this - I go back like I'm still under her control and tell her I killed all of you. Then, as a reward, they take me into the inner sanctum where I'll eventually smuggle the rest of you. Then - surprise muthafuka - we're in your house!...thoughts?"

No one responded immediately. A grim resolution had already settled over the group as they huddled together in the tiny, single room structure. Miroku continued to study the array of passages under the city with keen interest. Inuyasha uttered a low growl as his amber eyes also scanned the expansive grounds and bustling thoroughfare directly above.

"What if we made our own tunnel?"

Everyone looked up in surprise at the new guy crammed into the corner like a forgotten sardine.

"I know a technique called 'Breaking Point' that allows me to tunnel underground; using that we could ambush them!" He looked around at the others with growing enthusiasm, "I know you haven't known me for very long, but you'll see I'm actually a pretty tough fighter."

Deadpool jerked his head in Inuyasha's direction as he felt something being shoved against his ribs. He looked down to see a canteen in the white-haired boy's hand. The two exchanged a fleeting glance and Wade gave a short nod of comprehension, taking the container.

"A technique called Breaking Point, you say," the merc rubbed his chin as he turned back to Ryoga, "that does sound interesting. Could you give us a demonstration?"

"Sure I could," replied the boy, hopping to his feet. "Just come with me outside and I'll show you!"

Wade rose to follow. Unscrewing the cap, he flipped the canteen, dumping its contents over the unwitting teen's head.

Ryoga froze in the doorway as he felt the cold spring water cascade over his his hair and down his back. "What in the-" his squawk of outrage quickly became a high-pitched squeal as his entire body shrank down to the size of an eggplant.

Reaching into the mound of pajamas left on the floorboards, Deadpool pulled up the stunned piglet by its yellow bandanna. "Hey look who's back everybody - it's P-chan!"

Shippo, uncertain of what else to do, obligatorily clapped, as if at a magic trick he'd already seen too many times.

"Why'd you do that," Kagome asked.

"Because," the mercenary turned to the small dangling pig trembling with rage, "P-chan has a much more important role to play in our little murder-cult caper. Don't you, P-chan? Yes you do!"

"About that," Inuyasha rose, towering like a movie monster over the top of the holographic castle to meet Deadpool's eye, "You said, they're only interested the strongest. Then it only makes sense that I be the one to show up at their door. I could just as easily say that I killed you."

"Yeah, but we want it to be believable," Wade rolled his eyes, "besides, what are you going to do after you tell them that - slaughter all those freaks single-handedly?"

"I'll demand to meet their leader. He should agree to it if only because I have loads of powerful demonic energy that he'd love to get his hands on," the half-demon's fangs made another appearance as he smirked back at the mercenary, "I'll lure him out for you."