I don't own Invader Zim okay? I am glad to see so many people like this fic. So while I am working on a few things I figured I would update. But enough of this A/N, on with the fic!
Purple landed as softly as he could inside the fence of Area 51. The guards were still busy examining the wreckage of the Massive to notice that one of the Irken leaders who was on the ship when Dib had brought it down had just crossed their fence and into their jurisdiction. Purple took a deep breath and moved on. The important part was finding Zim. The labs were a highly secured fortress from what he could see, guards with guns that he knew fired projectiles instead of energy beams like most Irkens used. However, that did not mean that the essence of guard duty wasn't the same no matter what you were using. And from what Purple could see, had many of the same foibles. He crouched down in a sagebrush as best he could, knowing that plants in the desert hardly got tall enough for a Tallest to hide. At nearly 7 foot 5 inches tall, hiding wasn't that easy. A door opened, and Purple jumped along the wall, hoping that no one saw or heard him.
"Whoooooo! Humans rule!" One of the guards said as he danced around in a circle holding a can of beer in one hand, his other arm around his buddy, who was equally intoxicated.
"We're not alone in the universe, but we kicked their ass!" The other guard said.
"Hell yeah!" the first guard said. Purple rolled his eyes and looked on as the guards then passed out in front of the door. He then picked up the hat and shirt of the guard, slung the rifle over his shoulder, hoping the rest of the staff was just as clueless as the guards seemed to be. Zim was inside these labs, he just had to find exactly where. He looked at the computer in his arm cuff and followed the dot of Zim's TRAK. He was in a private section. Hopefully this won't take long... Purple thought as he headed down the hallways to get to where Zim was being kept.
"Hello?" One of the workers in the Area 51 labs said from behind Purple. "Where are you going sir? You know you are heading to Dib's labs where Zim is, right?"
This worker seemed naive and trusting, and remembering many of the shorter crew members of the Massive would be easily fooled by a guard, he did his best impression of a guard on an official job. "Don't you think I don't know that?" Purple said.
"Oh! I didn't know... I just..." The worker said.
"I have a job here that you are not a part of." Purple said in a gruff voice.
"Okay, just do a good job." The worker said as he ran off. Purple breathed a sigh of relief and headed to where he found Zim's TRAK to be. This meant that his PAK was still active and Zim was probably still alive. Once an Irken died, the PAK was no longer needed and stopped functioning. It wasn't uncommon in battles for many Irkens to become unknown soldiers in the battlefield disposed of however the winner (usually Irk) saw fit to. Which was just to put them all into a big hole in the ground. He had about a total of 9 hours of night to rescue Zim, get back to where Red was with Zim and then they could treat him and find a way to get back to Irk. Zim would be overenthusiastic to be personal aids to the Tallest themselves so he could be counted on to help them out. At least if Purple had it his way, that was what it would be. It had been 20 Earth years since they last heard from Zim and when they tried to call his PAK, he didn't answer, but the TRAK was showing he was still alive. Zim just ignored you because it had been such a long time since you called, he could have easily doubted it was real or thought it a malfunction.Purple thought as he headed through the corridors to a room that had in Dib's handwriting on a poster board in black magic marker, 'Dib the Great Paranormal Researcher's Labs. Do not enter without Dib's express permission. Seriously. Don't. It's booby trapped.' "That Meekrob powered human stink monkey with the pointy hair seriously goes on doesn't he?" Purple sighed as he adjusted the hat and the shirt he took off the passed out guard and slung the gun behind him, hoping there was no cameras about and reached to the knob. "Here's hoping it isn't locked. I don't know how to use a human gun."
The door to the labs creeked open and Zim looked up from his containment chamber. "Huh? You here to taunt me more? Or should I say I taunt you more? You know your defeat of my people is pyrrhic at best. It's like I told you before..." Zim said.
"Relax, it's me, Tallest Purple. That human stink monkey won't be taunting you anymore." Purple said as he headed over to Zim's containment chamber. "So this is how they kept you for 20 Earth years."
"Yes, reading magazines on human psychology most of the time, sometimes guns, looks like you have an AR-15 there. Small caliber but effective. I do have to give it that. Took it off a guard I see." Zim observed.
"So, all they've been doing to you is giving you magazines to read? Not torturing you for information on the Irken Empire?" Purple said as he looked for something that would release Zim.
"Well what are you doing here my Tallest wearing the shirt of a guard, a hat and a gun?" Zim asked. "And this has been torture. Not knowing what your enemy will do to you, but he did inadvertently give me insight into his mind and weaponry of his people with this. He can be brilliant but he's got a Vortian mind, overlooking massive flaws. Like with the Mechadoomers."
"We can talk later. I have got to get you out so you can help me heal up Red. He got injured on the crash when our escape pod landed on Earth due to a malfunction." Purple said. "Here, this looks like it turns off an alarm." He said as he switched it from 'secured' to 'unsecured' and then turned to the containment tube and pressed the 'Release' button. "Now we're going to have to get out of here. So stick with me Zim!" Purple ordered.
"Yes My Tallest." Zim said plainly, which struck Purple as kind of odd. Before this, Zim would have been ecstatic to follow such a command. After all, he spent 3 hours just saying "My Tallest" before Red shut him up. "I noticed the guards have been drinking a lot."
"Yeah, they're pretty idiotic. They didn't notice I am nearly a foot and a half taller than the average human male." Purple said as Zim followed him.
"Probably used to seeing Dib's hair. He grew to be about 6 foot 2 inches tall, but he still wears thick boots that add about 3 inches and that hair of his really got taller. I have to say it added at least 8 inches." Zim pulled out his fingers doing some quick math. "So that translates to about 85 inches which is a little under 7 feet tall, so yeah, they are kind of use to that tall a presence."
"Well that partially explains it." Purple said as he led Zim out the containment chamber. "But the shirt I grabbed was rather small... I doubt we'd be able to use it to hide."
"What do you mean my Tallest?" Zim asked.
"You'd jump on my chest and I'd hide you until we got to the desert outside the fence and I could fly back to where Red is resting." Purple explained.
"Go to the camera room. There's some shirts there the guards watching the footage around this place would change into because they spill coffee and donut frosting all over them a lot." Zim said. He looked at a map on the wall outside of Dib's lab. "Here." He jumped up and pointed at, knowing that he was still the height of an average 5th grade boy.
"You seem to know a lot about the operations here." Purple said as he followed Zim to the camera room.
"I had 20 Earth years to observe stuff. When that is all you do, you learn a lot. And your enthusiasm goes way down when you read too much psychology too..." Zim said. "Find out how the human mind works and you begin to question your own. It's nuts."
Purple nodded as he followed Zim and grabbed one of the shirts the guard had left and placed it over him, covering his PAK. Zim then jumped on with a little help from Purple and they headed back out the way they came, gun still strapped over in case they ran into any trouble. Purple was hoping that nothing would happen. Zim was not the spontaneous fighter that could be trusted to go crazy and do anything and everything in a fight. But he had gotten this far without any real incident, there was a good chance that he could get out the same way. He opened the door he broke in with and looked to find the guards he had looted for disguise reasons still passed out in the waning night. Purple looked to the east and saw that there was a faint light coming up. "Which way does the sun rise on this planet?" He asked.
"East." Zim said. "But you got a few more hours before anyone would notice anything."
"Good." It will take a few hours to get to Red, if we can do that before the sun is fully up, we're good." Purple explained as he tossed the fat guard's coffee and donut stained shirt to the mercy of the wind and the desert.
"Once we get out of the perimeter of the Area 51 base, there'll be less people seeing us. Just saucer morons and no one believes them anyway." Zim explained. "Dib would sometimes bring a few of the better looking and desirable female ones into his lab and make out with them on the desk in front of me. I don't know if he was trying to gross me out or I was a symbol of his biggest dream coming true."
"Did not need to know that Zim. Can you stop being Shrink Zim and be your old Invader Zim self? This is getting depressing faster than it is." Purple said as he flew across the desert and found the rock cave he had Red laying in.
"Coyotes!" Zim said as he pulled the AR 15 that Purple had stolen off the guard, pulled the charging lever back and pulled the trigger, firing at the coyotes, making them run off if they were not killed.
"Nice work Zim." Purple said in amazed earnest.
"Like I said, I read a lot of gun magazines the guards would leave too." Zim said.
Red sat up at the noise of the bullets and coyotes and held the laser pistol aloft as best he could. He saw the hat of the Area 51 guard and running on instinct yelled out, "You think your puny lead bullets can stop an Almighty Tallest of the Irken Empire? We're not out yet!" Red yelled before collapsing back again.
"He wasn't shot?" Zim asked as he ran over to Red. "I didn't mean to My Tallest, I was just hoping to stop those coyotes from eating your lifeless corpse."
"Zim, you're here to help PREVENT him from becoming a lifeless corpse." Purple said as he placed the hat down. "That was me Red, I think you just freaked out a little. I took a hat from a guard to get into the base."
"Good. Zim, am I glad to see you, I need your help." Red said with a smile.
"Never thought you'd say those words and mean it My Tallest." Zim said as he knelt next to Red.
"Yeah, me neither." Red said as he lay back down.
So how was that? Good? Bad? Short? Long? Let me know in a review. I know it wasn't an action packed escape but I figured after something that big the guards would be partying it up and be less than guard worthy. And I do have a tie in to my oneshot Victory or Defeat there, but once again, they are two separate fics. I also have a holiday project I am working on called Christmas Season Starts Earlier Each Year, a Nightmare Before Christmas fic. But enough story pimping aside, remember to read (well you just did) and to review! Ciao for now,
otherrealmwriter
aka
Realm