"I've changed my mind."
Tay watched as Spot put his boot in the doorway and blocked Racetrack's attempt to close the door in their faces. Part of her felt relieved as she was leery of Spot's plan to begin with. She did not care to be left in Racetrack's care while Spot left to 'take care of some things' as he'd told her the night before in their apartment. He was still so good at keeping secrets that Tay had little to no idea what things needed to be taken care of and part of her was a little disturbed by the implications. Spot had always had things to take care of and most of those problems seemed to have violent solutions.
"We had a deal, Higgins," Spot said as Racetrack wrenched the door back open and stood there looking miffed. Race glanced at Tay and she looked down, holding tight to the carpetbag in her hands and trying to look presentable. Spot stepped back behind Tay and placed his hand at the small of her back, trying to steer her forward but Tay resisted.
"Edward, who is it?" A woman's voice came from behind the door and Race's wife, Emily, soon appeared behind her husband.
Tay bit the inside of her cheek to keep from smiling at the mention of Racetrack's real name. She had never heard anyone call him 'Edward' before and it was a little off-putting. The humorous feeling soon died as Tay saw Emily carrying a small bundle in her arms. The child was busily gumming the pocket watch Race usually kept in his waistcoat and her berry-brown eyes searched the room around her as Emily held her. A strangled noise erupted from Tay's throat and she tried to keep calm, groping through the empty air behind her until she found Spot's hand and grabbed hold of him tightly.
"Spot, no. Please," Tay whispered, unable to take her eyes off of Race's daughter.
"We talked about this, doll," Spot answered as he squeezed her hand reassuringly. Tay turned to look at him, tears springing up in her eyes as he looked at her and nodded his head once. "You can do this."
"This is Spot and Tay," Race explained as Tay wiped her eyes and concentrated on the floor at her feet.
"It's nice to meet you both, I'm sure," Emily said as she shifted the bundle to her other hip and pulled the door open wide. "Come in."
"I gotta be going," Spot told her. He let go of Tay's hand and lifted her chin until she met his eyes. "Look at me. I'll be back in three days, okay? I know you can handle this."
"Why can't I just stay at the apartment?" Tay asked quietly. She had no desire to be rude to Race or to Emily but the thought of sharing the same space with their child unnerved her. Spot had been honest when he'd told her about Race's offspring but Tay hadn't expected to be hit so hard when she saw the child in person.
"Three days. I promise," Spot answered and it didn't escape Tay's notice that he'd ignored her question. Of course it was the same question he'd heard from her for the past week as he vaguely explained the need for her to stay with Race.
He dropped a kiss on her forehead and as he headed back down the hallway Tay fought the urge to run after him. There was a gnawing feeling in the pit of her stomach that he was headed into something far more dangerous than he was willing to admit to her. Instead of following Spot, Tay clutched her bag in her hands and stood awkwardly just inside Racetrack's apartment.
"Thank you for letting me stay," Tay mumbled as she looked around the interior. It was cheerful and cozy, two things that Tay wasn't sure she had been prepared for when she thought about the kind of place Racetrack would live in. She had pictured something more along the bunk room at the lodging house or the poker rooms out by the river. There was no stale alcohol smell and Tay was surprised that there wasn't even a hint of smoke from one of Race's trademark cigars.
"Are you hungry, Tay?" Emily asked as Race took over holding their daughter. He gently pried his daughter's fingers off his watch and placed it in his vest pocket. For a moment Tay thought the baby would start crying but she just blinked a few times and cracked a toothless smile as Race cooed to her.
"No." Tay instantly blushed at how impertinent she sounded. "I mean, no thank you. We ate before we came here."
"That's an interesting name you have there. With my husband having friends called Skittery and Bumlets I thought I had heard almost everything but I've never really heard of Tay before. Is it short for something?"
"It's just Tay. Or Anna. I'll answer to both," Tay explained. She tried to return the smile on Emily's face but found that she couldn't. There she was, starting off on the wrong foot like always. She twisted the strap of the carpet bag in her hands and tried to find some semblance of normalcy. Meeting new people had never been very easy for her and there was the fact that she'd always remained alone in the hope of keeping Spot at bay.
"Do you know where he's going?" Race asked in a low voice while Emily peered into a large pot she had boiling on the stove.
"Yeah, he told me all about it," Tay kidded. Race frowned at her flippant attitude and Tay sighed. "I don't know where he's going, Race. It ain't like I didn't ask but you know how he is. I just know it can't be good."
"You ain't wrong about that," Race answered. He shifted the bundle in his arms. "This is Rose, by the way."
Tay swallowed thickly and tried to ignore the lump in her throat as she looked at Race's child. It took a minute before she could get her emotions under control and was able to whisper, "She's beautiful, Race."
"Takes after her mother," Race grinned as he looked across to where Emily stood in the kitchen. Something seemed to pass between them and Race appeared a little hesitant. "Do you want to hold her?"
Tay just shook her head, unable to form the simple word 'no'. She took a step back away from Race and tried to focus despite the room beginning to spin before her eyes. It took several deep breaths before she could calm down and all she knew was that in that moment she wanted one person to be by her side and that person was Spot.
"I have to go," Tay told Race quietly.
"I didn't mean to upset you, kid." Race crossed the room and handed Rose over to Emily before he returned to Tay. "And I don't mean to be rude, but you can't go anywhere. I mean, you gotta stay if you wanna keep us both out of trouble."
Race grinned at her good-naturedly and Tay tried to return it but only managed a small smile. She felt so entirely out of place in the scene of domestic happiness she'd just been dropped into. Part of her was angry with Spot for leaving her alone but she also knew Racetrack was right. In order to keep from ending up on Spot's bad side she would have to grin and bear it for the next three days.
"I knew you hadn't given those up." Race turned to see Tay step up onto the roof nearby and made her way over to where he stood smoking a cigar. She held a cigarette and box of matches in her own hand and lit it before tossing the match over the ledge into the street below.
"Bad habits are hard to break," Race chuckled. "I'm guessing Em sent you up here?"
"Can't blame her," Tay answered. "These things are terrible."
Race glanced sideways at Tay and thought about how much she had seemed to have changed in the past three days. At first, Tay had been her usual prickly self and Race had tried to make excuses for her even though Emily hadn't asked for any. In fact it was Emily who seemed to take more of a shine to Tay than Race did having Tay in the house. He recalled the conversation they'd had about their visitor the first night.
"She's scared, Edward."
"Tay's fine, she can handle herself."
"I know when someone is broken and terrified and she's both. She is certainly not handling things. Have you seen the way she looks at Rose? Most of my friends can't wait to hold her but Tay just looks like she wouldn't touch Rose with a ten foot pole."
"It's a long story, Em."
"I know you said she came from the streets, like you, but there's something about her that I just can't put my finger on. I was thinking maybe we could get her to stay a few more days. At least until the end of the week, maybe?"
"She won't stay. Once Conlon comes back, she'll be gone. I'm honestly a little surprised she stayed this long. Believe me, Em, she can handle things on her own."
"So, how did you two meet?" Tay asked, breaking Race's concentration. He let the memory of his conversation with Emily fade before answering.
"At the racetrack."
"Obviously," Tay grinned. She tipped her head to one side and blew a thin stream of smoke out between her lips. "Don't mind me saying so but she seems a little high class for you, Race."
"She is," Race admitted. "She don't have a lot of money but she comes from a good family. We met when she was selling flowers over at Sheepshead. The minute I saw her, I was hooked."
"No offense but the only person who 'hooked' more girls than you was Jack," Tay kidded. "And now look at the two of you, all settled down and married."
"You're one to talk," Race answered with a grin. "I'll bet there is more than one girl who wished she had tied down the infamous king of Brooklyn."
"Ain't like those girls ain't still around," Tay said bitterly.
Race was only slightly surprised by Tay's talk of other girls as Spot had never been known for settling for just one girl. There had been plenty of times when Race had watched Spot flirt with any number of girls regardless of their station in life. Spot had always seemed to take it just far enough to cause Tay pain before he'd break it off.
"You know, Higgins, I'm not sure you deserve all this happiness," Tay told him with a grin. "I would have lost a lot of money if I played the odds of you ending up with such a sweetheart."
"Just played my cards right, kid," Race smiled, thinking back of his courtship of Emily.
"Tay." Race and Tay both turned to find Spot standing behind them looking no worse for wear than he had three days earlier but Race still felt something was off about the younger man. Tay immediately tossed her cigarette and rushed toward Spot, hugging him tightly.
"What's wrong?" Tay asked as she noticed Spot grimace when she held him.
"Nothing to worry about, doll," Spot answered, holding his hand over his left side. He looked over to where Race still stood, cigar in hand. "You held up your end of the deal, Higgins. I'll talk to my boys about the fight."
"You're both welcome to stay the night," Race pointed out as he remembered Emily's argument a couple days earlier. He wasn't really sure he wanted Spot in his house but there was Tay to think about and Race knew she wouldn't leave Spot's side once he had returned.
"Go get your stuff," Spot told Tay, seemingly ignoring Racetrack's polite invitation.
"But I thought maybe…"
"It's time to go. So move."
Tay seemed to hesitate but decided better of it when she saw the look on Spot's face. As the two departed Race thought briefly of following them but decided three days of being mixed up in Tay's business was enough.
Spot tipped the glass back and the last dregs of whiskey burned his throat as he swallowed. It was the cheap stuff that he only drank because it was the best way of suppressing his inner demons. Tay was in the bedroom, busily yanking drawers open and slamming them shut as an outlet for her anger. She'd tended to his injuries silently before she retreated to the bedroom and made it clear she wasn't happy.
"Tay." There was no response other than another drawer being slammed shut. Spot took a deep breath and tried again. "Anna, come out here."
He fought the urge to storm into the bedroom and yank her out by her hair. He hadn't laid a finger on her since the day they'd stepped out of the clerk's office as newlyweds. It was the longest they had gone without some kind of physical violence and Spot struggled with that on a daily basis.
"What?" Tay asked as she appeared in the bedroom doorway. Two pinpoints of color stained her cheeks and she'd pulled all the pins out of her hair, leaving it to hang down around her shoulders. He felt a familiar arousal as he looked at her while she stood there, eyes blazing with anger and he felt that he wanted to kiss her until she had no breath left.
"Stop slamming shit around," he told her. He gestured to the seat across from him. "Sit down."
Tay hesitated for a brief moment but Spot had made sure to use the tone of voice that she knew better than to argue with. She slumped into the chair across the narrow table and began to bite at the fingernails on her left hand.
"When are you gonna learn that what I do out on those streets don't concern you?" Spot asked. He had always warned her to stay out of his business, especially when it had become much more dangerous than life as a newsie.
"Considering I'm the one who has to patch you up, I got a right to be concerned," Tay answered.
"If it bothers you that much, I can always find another girl to take care of me," Spot told her coldly. He hadn't wanted to hurt her but at the same time he did.
"Go ahead," Tay challenged with resentment burning in her eyes. How dare she challenge him as though he wouldn't willingly walk right out that door and into the bed of some cheap tart. He blamed the whisky and the fact that he'd been trying so hard with her. For her.
Tay reached across the table for Spot's glass and poured herself a healthy shot of whisky but Spot noticed the bottle trembled in her hands as she held it. Part of him still wanted to teach her a lesson. He didn't need her, he could have any girl in the city. Deep down he knew the only one he wanted was right there in that apartment.
Tay coughed once after swallowing the first shot of whisky but quickly poured herself another. She'd never been able to hold her liquor and Spot wondered how long she would go on before she blacked out. He couldn't leave her like that and he grew somber as he knew his threat was what had driven her to pick up the bottle in the first place.
"Anna," Spot said quietly. Tay grimaced as she swallowed the second shot of whisky and glanced up at him with that same reckless look that took his breath away. She'd always tried to keep everything perfectly contained but when she did release her anger it was a bewildering experience for Spot.
"Make sure you clean up after 'cause I don't want the sheets smelling like that cheap perfume she loves so much," Tay told him as she waved the glass in the air carelessly, coming close to spilling the whisky.
Spot walked around to the other side of the table and put his hand over the glass, guiding it back down to the table. He knew her well enough to understand that she was trying to put up a brave front and that, like so many other times, she didn't mean a word of what she said. The fact was he didn't mean anything with his threat but both were too stubborn to take any of it back. Part of him wanted to wring her pretty little neck but he held himself back. It was almost as though she knew he was trying his best not to give into the urge to strike her and for some reason that caused her to be even more heedless.
"Don't you have somewhere to be?" Tay asked as she tried to slide the glass out from under his hand.
"You want me to leave?" Spot asked. He lifted the glass to his lips and swallowed the whisky as Tay frowned up at him. He reached down, taking her by the arm and lifting her onto her feet. He caught a tendril of her hair and twisted it around his fingers. "Answer the question, doll."
Tay opened her mouth but no sound came out and she closed it again quickly. Her eyes searched Spot's face and he felt the tide of anger begin to ebb away. He could have left her like she had left him all those years ago but he'd never wanted to. The way she looked at him reminded him of that night he'd found her kissing another boy. She had grown so determined to rid herself of him and at first Spot had been caught off guard, until he realized that she didn't mean any of it. It was just another game to be played and it was one he was determined to win.
"Well?" he asked, concentrating on the tendril of her hair he was twisting and untwisting around his fingers. Her cheeks were flushed and he knew it was only partially the fault of the whisky. He could practically hear her heart pounding in her chest as she tried to avoid his gaze by focusing instead on the top collar button of his shirt.
"I don't want you to leave," Tay whispered and the flush of her cheeks only deepened. Before Spot could even consider her answer or the fact that he had won, Tay drew him to her and kissed him fiercely. Yet again she had surprised him with her ferocity and it had played out exactly the way he had wanted. But even though he won he was somewhat disturbed by his continued need to break her.
Author's Note: Edward? I know most stories go with Race being Italian and I've seen Antonio used most often for his name but I read somewhere that the real newsie he was based on was named Edward. I have no idea where I read it but it's always stuck with me. Anyway...I hope you enjoy the story thus far! Even if you hate it...drop me a line or review and let me know :-) I have tried to work in what little fluff I can get but with these two it's an uphill battle lol! Happy reading!