A/N: I'm not completely satisfied with this chapter. The subtle issues and emotions didn't come out the way I'm really satisfied with but I hope you will enjoy it anyway! Happy new year! May this year be so much better than last year….please! *Desperate cry*

Chapter 17: Friends or strangers

Yavin 4

After ending an eye opening conversation with Yoda, it was surprisingly pleasant to be out of the command center. Feeling the humid air was actually a relief as Anakin felt his breath return to him. An audible sigh left his lips as he puffed out loudly the simmering frustrations he couldn't put into words before he noticed the figure leaned up against the wall behind the door he just exited.

"I see you are here in one piece, and I didn't hear any lightsabers go off, so I will conclude that things went well?" Obi Wan stated cheekily as he sauntered over to Anakin's side.

"It could have gone worse," Anakin agreed as he faced his old mentor. Admittedly, he felt much lighter than before, yet he wasn't entirely thrilled by it either.

A warm smile spread across Obi Wan's exhausted, weathering face and he placed a grateful hand on Anakin's shoulder. "I'm happy for you. I truly am." He squeezed gently with that intimate and rare smile on his face.

As much as Anakin wanted to agree, instead of comforting him, it did the exact opposite as he reluctantly pulled away from Obi Wan's touch. Everything seemed to be going so well. Too well. This wasn't what he was expecting at all, as the skeptical part of him wouldn't accept it. Dreadfully, his lips thinned at the thought.

An understanding smile crossed Obi Wan's face as he quickly tucked his arms into his robes and stood a little taller. Adjusting effortlessly with his legendary calm and composure as he promptly changed the subject. "Well, I think that was enough excitement for one day. Some rest is in order. Ahsoka, I'm sure you can assist in finding Anakin some accommodations?"

"Yes," Ahsoka responded smoothly, stepping out of whatever corner she was hiding. "Don't worry about it. I have everything under control." She said brightly.

"Good," Obi Wan replied, then sighed heavily. The weight of the last couple of days started to show on his exhausted face. "If you both excuse me. I will be spending some much needed time in-the-refresher." He beamed through the fatigue, physical pain, and today's many moments of embarrassment he had to swallow. The gently aging man was ready for some much needed self care.

It was pretty evident and Anakin and Ahsoka both grinned knowingly in response. Falling into the cozy pattern the three had built on over the years was easy. At least for that moment, it felt like time never passed between the three of them. The shenanigans of youth seem to further Obi Wan's fatigue, and there were times he honestly thought he had inherited not one but two padawans. But, at least this time, he didn't seem to mind and found a new appreciation for his situation.

Impishly, Anakin added, "Don't rest too much; otherwise, the ladies won't be able to keep their hands off of you." He stated with guile as he often did before. For as long as he could remember, the Galaxy loved to compare the two men, and they both were fully aware of this.

Bursting into genuine laughter, recognizing the old joke, Obi Wan replied, "Oh no. We wouldn't want that now, would we?" His eyes glistened joyfully as he winked in a carefree way. Enjoying the moment, his eyes lingered once more on the two of them. Then, not wasting another second, Obi Wan pivoted to take off to the left, vanishing instantly around a corner like he was never there.

From what Anakin gathered from Obi Wan's uncharacteristic hasty departure, it highlighted how drained he was, and Anakin actually felt little pity for the older man. After all, he had a pretty good reason to feel that way between what happened on Nevah and their conversation on the ship. All things considered, Anakin couldn't fault the poor guy. True to their relationship, Anakin proved to be a handful yet again. It's ok, the old man could handle it. Slyly, he thought to himself. It was his sworn duty to keep Obi Wan's life interesting.

Doing a slight stretch with her arms out, Ahsoka turned to Anakin, keeping her promise to Obi Wan, "Let's go this way. There's a sleeping quarter in the western barracks with an empty room you can use. It's one of the nicer ones. No Yavin rats and trust me! You don't want to meet one. They make the womp rats on Tatooine look tame!" She joked thoughtfully.

Despite the generous offer, he wasn't sure how he felt about taking a nice room someone else could benefit from. So Anakin decided to follow next to her with his hands behind his back quietly before he added, "I don't need anything fancy. I won't be here long."

Caught by surprise, Ahsoka stiffened up. That remark hit her on some deep level as she tripped over her step. "Oh." She said softly before catching herself with Anakin watching out of the corner of his eye. She hesitated before adding, "Well, it's empty right now, so there's no reason you can't use it." She said, all the joy vanishing and dissolving into a casual indifference that was a lie.

With a stirring in his heart, Anakin felt horrible but said nothing else as they continued on in awkward silence. As they made their way through the Rebel base, Anakin couldn't help looking around, his eyes catching new observations. It finally dawned upon him as Anakin noticed how incredibly scarce the rebellion abilities really were. It was like he was seeing everything again for the first time. The large crates he noticed before now revealed only 1-2 weapons in their empty volumes. Far from being stable, most of the equipment was patchworked together with tape, rope, and anything else readily available. It was a miracle any of it worked at all. Dreadfully, these were all tall tale signs of a struggling rebellion he didn't notice before.

After spending several agonizing minutes in silence next to his former Padawan, Anakin stole a glance again. With eyes set directly ahead, Ahsoka's face was frozen like a guarded statue, but her hunched shoulders gave away her state of mind. Trying to get a better sense, he tapped into their shared bond that had unfortunately weakened over the years apart. Other than some soft splinters of sadness, he couldn't really glean very much from that either, causing him to feel more agitated. He hated seeing her so gloomy and dejected especially since he was the cause of it. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore and spoke up.

"So, um, have you been on Obi Wan's ship?" Anakin asked, attempting to appear nonchalant and cool.

Slowly, the facade melted and Ahsoka seemed appreciative of the change in topic, much to Anakin's relief. "Yeah," she pipped up, her previous stormy mood lifting, followed by laughing sarcastically. "That rickety thing? It's so funny. He's incredibly possessive of that thing. You can hear it clanking whenever it takes off from one end to the other end of the encampment! Everyone knows when he's leaving, and it's amazing how that thing makes it off the ground, yet he won't let anyone touch it." She stops to turn to him as her face sobers again for a different reason. In response, he also paused to listen. "No one is allowed to work on that beatup thing, not even me." Rolling her eyes in exasperation, Anakin could clearly see how personal the issue was to her as she threw up her hands. "Can you believe that? I get that he doesn't want some random person working on it. But me? You would think he would trust me, at least. I don't know what his deal is." She gasped loudly and her feet continued, pounding the dirt decidedly with bolder steps.

That fire never seemed to have left Ahsoka and he was surprised how grateful he was for that. A small smile crept on Anakin's face as his eyes softened tenderly before he followed after her. It was a childlike innocence she still possessed despite whatever she had been through, her roughness around the edges reminded him she wasn't the same teenager he knew years ago, and he clung to the idea that the snippy little girl was still in there. Catching himself staring at her, he looked away before she noticed, as he raked his mind with what she revealed. Unfortunately, Obi Wan's secrecy was probably related to him.

"It probably wasn't personal," Anakin suggested in solace.

But a frown crossed her face instead as she twisted her arms, grunting. "I suppose. No one really knows what he's thinking about anymore these days."

An astromech droid warbled on a dented wheel and rolled by them on its routine path, following the deep lines etched in the ground as it passed. Both lost in thought, they continued on, walking this time in reflective silence. With her togruta features twisted in concentration, Anakin wondered, a little too curiously, why it bothered her so much as Obi Wan has always been a little secretive. At least to Anakin, this wasn't surprising, and maybe he embodied some of that habit from his Master as well. Force knows, Anakin wasn't ever a wide open book to Ahsoka either. Thinning his lip, a bit perplexed, he didn't understand why it affected her so much. Fortunately, he didn't have to wonder long as she explained further.

"He's so mysterious about everything and doesn't tell anyone anything. That's the times he's even around. He's taken the name of his ship to heart when it comes to expressing himself," she explained.

"Nothing?" Anakin answered for her. Indeed, the name bothered him on a deep visceral level and her complaints further confirmed what he had suspected of the Obi Wan's current mental state.

Shyly, Ahsoka nodded, biting her lip as her eyes slowly raised to make contact with his blue questioning eyes, and he let out a heavy sigh.

A bit defeated, Ahsoka offered a despondent shrug and cooly answered. "That's how he is nowadays."

With a sense of utter frustration building up, Anakin found himself speaking freely now. His thoughts loose in the way he used to be around her. "Really? It seems kinda, dark and broody. More like…"

"You?" Ahsoka cut in. Throwing her head back scornfully, she laughed bitterly. "Oh, you have no idea. That man's mood could turn on a credit." Openly upset, she threw her hands up in defeat. "That's our Master Kenobi for you." She lamented sadly.

"More like Master of Moods." Anakin grinned solemnly as he quipped, drowning his regret and guilt with sarcasm. He couldn't help feel the weight of responsibility for Obi Wan's behavior.

"OOO. I like that one!" Ahsoka replied, grinning a toothy smile with her eyes bright with appreciation. It was what she needed to hear to filter out her frustrations.

"Did you now?" Anakin smiled more genuinely, crossing his arms as they shared a look. It felt comfortable in a warm and deeply recognizable way that he had forgotten about. A habit of their's with inside jokes and sharp banter that played a prominent role in their relationship. It's how they dealt with difficult situations.

"That's pretty accurate!" Ahsoka continued with renewed energy. "But, you know." She started, "I think he'll be better now that you're back. We all will be." She chimed in hopefully. That contagious optimism she didn't seem to lose.

What she said felt like a lead weight in his heart. The growing hesitance and suspicion finally materialized into what he dreaded. Instead of joining in her glee, Anakin stood there with a troubled expression. Unfortunately, he didn't share her reverie. Instead, he was filled more with concern and dismay. The dear sweet girl, she really couldn't help herself. Stemming off further disappointment, he needed to stop this now. This was a dangerous path and it was unacceptable to have her sitting on false hopes of something he wouldn't be able to deliver. For what it's worth, it was in her best interest that he was honest from the beginning. After all he put her through, what he put everyone through, he owed her that much.

"Ahsoka…I'm not here to fight your war." He started.

Hitting her like slamming into a mudhorn, Ahsoka's face froze in shock and confusion with her mouth slightly ajar. From her perspective, Anakin could understand why his presence and purpose here didn't make sense to her, but then again, she didn't know about his family, and he wasn't about to disclose that.

"Then why did you return?" She finally collected herself enough to ask, still twitching in puzzlement.

"I'm here for Palpatine," Anakin explained. Emperor Palpatine…Darth Sidious. It was all the same to him. It was the man he looked up to as a father. A man he had trusted with his darkest secrets and felt an acceptance he didn't feel elsewhere. Someone who gave him false hopes and promises.

"Oh, so you're here for revenge?" She rebuked him as she took a couple steps away with her face mirroring her rattled thoughts, trying to piece things together.

"Not revenge." Standing taller, feeling the need to defend himself as he corrected her. "Justice. Revenge is not the Jedi way."

"But you're not a Jedi, are you?" Ahsoka shot back quickly. The accusation hung thick in her voice as all jovial sense from their previous conversation was gone.

With harsh words meant to stab, they certainly met their mark. Stinging like a burning dagger to his heart, Anakin looked away. As he suspected, a part of her was still mad at him, and he assumed it was most likely related to what happened at the Temple. He could sense it. It answered some questions in his mind whether she knew, and he found himself more relieved by this. If she had completely forgiven him for those actions, he wasn't sure he would believe it or want her to.

She continued, "it's ok. Neither am I." Then she looked away too, into the far distant past, into a time and place that Anakin couldn't see.

Cryptic in nature and puzzling as it was, he decided not to indulge in his curiosity and pry into her life. Whatever dark deeds she could have committed were nothing compared to his transgression. This wasn't a common ground that they could build upon, and she couldn't understand how he felt or his reason. So he decided not to say anything further. It became more apparent like an open wound, despite the brief moments of recollection and tenderness, they were different people now. A gaping valley of time and experiences separated them and he intended to respect that distance.

Swiveling his head back to look at her again found her still looking into the distance, but the air between them was different, like she came to the same conclusion.

"Well," Ahsoka began, turning around to look at him again. Her face was stoic and unreadable, and a part of him felt pain. She pointed to the left. "There's an empty room in that sleeping quarter. It'll be down the hall to your right. It has bedding and everything you need. One of the other tenants can help you if you need anything. It's all yours…for however long you're staying here." The acrid in her voice was searing.

After that, she didn't wait for him to answer as she turned her back to him.

"Ahsoka, wait," Anakin called after her, taking a step in her direction. He thought he could handle her disappointment better. Reasoning to himself that her protection would ultimately be enough to tolerate this.

She paused before looking over her shoulders with her montrals perking up ever so slightly.

"Thank you…for everything," Anakin said. It wasn't enough. There was so much more to say, and it stayed caught in his throat.

If she understood, she didn't show it while offering him a weak smile before walking off again.

Every beat of his heart throbbed loudly in his chest. After watching her walk off, never once looking back at him, he ran his hand through his hair in frustration, huffing loudly as he glared feebly upwards into the sky. The anguish and self loathing rumbling through his veins caused his muscles to twitch in irritation. Desperately, he would give anything to see Padmé right now and ask for her advice. It made him miss her even more, being in need of her gentle touch and thoughtfully crafted words. He didn't know what to do in these situations. He was never good at them. Deciding to let the mess he made be as it was, he dropped his shoulders forward, heading towards the sleeping quarters. Another mark toward his penance, he supposed.

A/N: A build up to an eventual blow up? Tick tock…tick tock. Plo Koon talk coming up as promised.