She couldn't help but laugh. Bilbo stood there in horror with several dwarves groaning at his feet with Gandalf the wizard standing on his doorstep, and Bluebell Baggins chose to laugh. She snorted crudely, doubling over and grabbing at her stomach, trying to control herself, but she was surely lost. How could she not laugh, all things considered. How could she not laugh at what she was seeing? The circumstances were altogether quite out of the ordinary, and unordinary things never occurred in Bag End. And now herself and Bilbo were the not-so-proud hosts of several dwarves they've never seen before and a grand wizard she had long forgotten from the one birthday he had apparently attended.
"Does the lass laugh in jest?" one of the dwarves barked, offended.
Bluebell tried to stop herself. But it seemed once she started, stopping was impossible. And soon she had to lean on her mother's glory box that was still stained with the mud from Kili's shoe. She couldn't bring herself to care much. At last, Bilbo walked over, clearly concerned and unsure whether he should deal with his new unwelcome guests or his sister who seemed to be stuck in a right fit.
"Are you...alright?" he asked.
"I...I...y-yes, of course I am, brother, I..." Bluebell cut herself off as she finished off with a loud snort and another burst of bubbly laughter. At last it seemed to die down, the dwarves slowly getting to their feet and watching the pair in obvious bemusement. Gandalf seemed to be chuckling under his breath, so unlike the disrespectful laughter Bluebell had just bestowed upon them. He ducked under the doorway, trying his best not to accidentally hit his head. "I...I apologize. I just...all of this is just so silly, to be fair. I've never encountered anything like this."
"Dwarves?" one of them asked.
"Not exactly. I suppose the circumstances in general," Bluebell said, flattening her blouse as she tried to regain what composure she had left.
"I'd like to introduce you lot to the Baggins siblings," Gandalf suddenly spoke, silencing them. It was not aggressive nor intimidating. In fact, Gandalf sounded as friendly as Rosemary pretended to be, but he sounded genuine. His smile was welcoming, and Bluebell felt it familiar, as though she had seen it before. "Bilbo Baggins...and his younger sister, Bluebell Baggins."
"I...how do you do," Bilbo mumbled, still put out.
"I hope you don't take what just happened and pin it against me," Bluebell smiled, bowing her head. "Otherwise, it's nice to meet you all. Although...from what my brother's recently told me, Gandalf and I have crossed paths before, yes?"
Gandalf smiled, unaware of the tension behind Bluebell's words. "You have grown to resemble so much of your mother. A good thing as well, Belladonna was a lovely woman. Now, I'm aware some of our fellow dwarves have found Bag End before we could?"
As if waiting for their cue, Dwalin, Balin, Fili, and Kili had suddenly entered the hall, all baring stains from the food they were either destroying or cooking. They all elicited happy yells, pushing past Bilbo and Bluebell to get to their comrades. The dwarves who remained strangers to them lit up in excitement, embracing their companions and greeting them with happy words and congratulations for whatever they had accomplished before their current reunions.
"I need...I need to have a word with Gandalf," Bilbo said quietly. "This will not stand. I need to speak with him."
Bluebell grabbed his arm just as he made to march over. "Bilbo, be reasonable. If you start a tiff right as these dwarves have come together, I'm afraid it won't be their words they'll use to defend the wizard. Give them a moment. Wait to see what Gandalf has to say. You must."
Bilbo tried to protest, but it seemed Gandalf was very much aware on the subject of their argument, as he had ducked away into the dining room, the crowd of dwarves following him. Bilbo huffed angrily, but he stalked off, no determination in his step, which plainly told Bluebell he was not off to tell Gandalf off. That would hinder Bluebell's plan. She knew it was wrong and especially selfish of her, but she was going to attend this adventure with or without her brother or his approval.
Smiling, she hummed and followed.
She had quickly learned and was introduced to the new dwarves, carefully observing their body language as well as the way they spoke. Bluebell liked to think she could read people very well, as they often did not do the same for her. To those in the Shire, she'd always be Bilbo's mad sister that needed a caretaker.
There were three brothers by the names of Dori, Nori, and Ori. Dori was the eldest, and he had happily shook Bluebell's hand when she introduced herself to him, though he already knew her name after her fits of laughter. Bluebell got the sense he was rather arrogant, though vastly intelligent. He spoke eloquently, and it mostly had to do with his own person, but Bluebell also got a sense he was a mother hen, especially where his youngest brother was concerned. As for Nori, Dori was more often scolding or smacking him upside the head for his quips or actions. Dori was a stern dwarf, she had learned, but she was keen on learning more.
Nori was the middle brother. There was sort of a mischievous aura about him, not just in the way he smirked or his eyes swooped over Bluebell in keen interest not for her words, but for her curves. And while flattered, she did not let that slide. When Nori spoke, he was rather mysterious, as though there were always some sort of ulterior motive behind whatever words he used. Bluebell would figure he could lie himself out of anything, which made him the perfect yet most imperfect candidate for interrogations, because the truth could never be found. He regarded Bluebell in earnest, but there was nothing under the surface he was interested in.
Ori was the youngest brother and, as she had learned, the youngest of the company. He technically wasn't supposed to be there either, but he had insisted and fought with his brothers until they were forced to bring him along. Bluebell found she liked him best. Despite being many years older than she, he was innocent and childlike, something she wanted to protect, even if he didn't need it. He was very kind, and he talked to Bluebell, genuinely interested in what she had to say. But when she questioned why he insisted on carrying around a big leather-clad book with him everywhere, he had turned red and quickly changed the subject. Dwarves were strangely secretive on a number of subjects.
There were two other brothers in the lot as well as their cousin: Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur.
Bifur was the eldest of the trio, and he happened to be their cousin. Bluebell had been quite horrified when she had finally got a good look of him, only two see he had an axe head imbedded into his face. When she tried to ask him what happened(looking back on that now, that could be considered quite rude and invasive), he spoke in a tongue she could not understand. When Bifur could see she was not catching on, he used hand gestures instead. Despite his terrifying appearance, she found him to be quite good company. He had funny habits, she noticed. He would snort and shake his head at the antics of Fili and Kili, who appeared to try to get Bluebell to laugh by berating Dwalin with a million stupid questions, but he would stare proudly at his cousins, even if they were just retorting back and forth with minute insults and quips.
Bombur was the elder brother to Bofur, she had learned. Quite unlike his sibling, Bombur was soft spoken and gentle, so to speak, but Bluebell got the sense he could do some real harm if he truly wished. He addressed Bilbo and Bluebell with surprising respect, shaking both of their hands and introducing himself. While his size was impressive, that did nothing to hinder his overall presence. He laughed with the other dwarves and happily participated in grabbing the heavier things from the pantry his fellow dwarves struggled to. Bluebell found his strength very surprising and admirable, even if it was just a few cheese wheels. However, even she and Bilbo struggled to heave those things in one at a time, and Bombur held three without breaking a sweat.
Bofur was initially just a handsome face with a grin that could rival Nori's, but his personality really drew Bluebell to him. He was very charismatic and seemed to be in on every joke. He seemed to break out in song every few minutes, whether it be belting it to his fellow dwarves or under his breath as he lugged something in one direction or another. He had eagerly shook Bilbo's hand, even going as far as to ruffle his hair. He had given Bluebell a kiss on the top of her hand and even took off his hat. While it seemed quite uncharacteristically gentlemanly, he had waggled his eyebrows suggestively before being hit upside the head by Bombur. Bofur was overall such a friendly dwarf, someone Bluebell could see herself laughing and sharing stories with him.
At last there were a pair of two brothers, both of which Bluebell struggled to find her footing with.
Oin was the elder brother, judging by the silver of his hair as well as the horn he carried around because he seemed to struggle to hear. He regarded Bilbo and Bluebell quite respectively, otherwise he ignored them completely, mumbling to himself. He wasn't rude purposefully, so to speak, though his social skills were rather lackluster by Hobbit standards, and even then Bluebell often fell short, so perhaps she shouldn't judge too harshly.
Gloin, on the other hand, resembled a lot of Dwalin's attributes. He was gruff and intimidating, glaring shrewdly at the pair of Hobbits before them and only nodding as a greeting. He seemed almost suspicious of the pair, as though he did not trust them. Bluebell could understand that, as they had just met, but as far as their species go, Hobbits tended to be the most open of creatures. What lies are behind their eyes? Perhaps, if he had glared so suddenly at Rosemary or Lobelia then Bluebell would completely understand his reaction, but Bluebell liked to think she and Bilbo came off as kinder and more outgoing creatures. Although, with the red currently in her brother's cheeks, perhaps Gloin wasn't so much on the ignorant side.
Bluebell was absolutely smitten. All of these dwarves were the perfect comrades, in her most honest opinion. She could see herself laughing with them, dining with them, sharing tall tales around a campfire while they clapped her across the shoulder and addressed her as a friend instead of an obstacle or the mad Baggins she was that the Shire always saw her as. They would not think her crazy, her ideas and wishes so farfetched she should be ashamed of them. She desperately wanted to attend this adventure with them; she was determined to, Gandalf and Bilbo be damned.
Bluebell found herself now between the pantry and the dining room, watching as the dwarves marched back and forth, their arms full with their belongings, though she could not find herself to care. Bilbo, on the other hand, very much seemed to, as he was arguing with several of them. It would be more pertinent for him to argue with a mirror, however, as the mirror would talk back with the same, feverish movements. These dwarves, on the other hand, paid him absolutely no mind.
"Put that back! Put that back!" he shouted over the roar of the hearty laughter and barks of encouragement.
Bluebell ducked behind Bombur, smiling in fervor as she found herself in the kitchen where Dwalin and Gloin were occupying, preparing the meat for their grand pre-adventure feast. She stood just outside of their little bubble, bouncing on the balls of her feet with her pearly whites glinting in the firelight. At last Dwalin noticed her, pausing in his slicing ministrations with the links of sausages Bilbo had bought earlier that week.
"Can we...help you?" he asked, skeptical.
"I was just...wondering if any of you lot needed any help? I'd be happy to give a hand or two," Bluebell asked.
Gloin grunted disapprovingly, returning to his activities. Dwalin glared at him, as though scolding him with his eyes for leaving him to answer the Hobbit lass alone.
"I don't see how...well, perhaps you could-"
"Blueball! You could help Fili and I with the table!" Kili suddenly chirped, throwing an arm over her shoulders.
"Bluebell," Bluebell corrected, but she happily followed him to find his brother yanking off the tablecloth on their table, along with the platters and silverware still on it, Miraculously, he had caught them, saving them from their fate of smashing into pieces, just as the cookie jar earlier had. "Kili said you may need my help?"
Fili brightened considerably. "Would it trouble you to ask for some plates, silverware, and...perhaps any jugs you've got lyin' about for the ale. How many are there, Ki? Ten?"
"Who taught you to count?" Kili asked, pushing Fili. "Let's see...we got Balin, Dwalin, Gloin, Oin, and us...that's six. Uh...Dori, Nori, Ori...nine. Plus Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur...twelve. Master Gandalf...thirteen. Miss Bluebell, which makes fourteen. Uh...will your brother be joinin' us?"
Bluebell looked over her shoulder in time to see Bilbo fighting with Master Oin over a chair.
"I dare say not," Bluebell said, smiling guiltily.
"And Uncle?" Fili asked.
"Master Dwalin said he'd be late, but we'd start without him," Kili answered.
"Uncle? Who is your uncle?" Bluebell asked.
"Thorin. He'll be leadin' the company, but he won't be here 'til later. Be best if you let him talk to your brother alone. Nothin' wrong with you, but Uncle Thorin prefers gettin' down to business. No sidetracking," Kili advised, pulling Bluebell by the wrist back to the kitchen, perhaps to grab plates and other things Fili asked for.
"Well, actually, I was thinking-"
"Where do you keep the plates?" Kili asked, pushing past Gloin and Dwalin to get access to the many cabinets. He began opening them at random, poking his head in and continuing along without closing them behind him. "Found the forks and knives. Here, hold out your hands."
"Since I've got you here, could you lend me your ear?" Bluebell asked, obliging his request and trying to ignore the glares from Dwalin and Gloin. "You know, I understand Gandalf has requested Bilbo for this journey, but if he's given any indication already, he's not all for it. I, on the other hand-"
"Here we are!" Kili said, completely ignoring Bluebell. He brought out a stack of multi-colored plates, adding to the column with more that he found, making Bluebell turn white. If even one of those plates smashed, she would sure it would kill her brother. "Let's get back to Fili!"
"I...but...okay," Bluebell sighed with defeat and followed the dwarf back to the dining room, where Fili seemed to be engaged in a conversation with Master Gandalf. Bluebell instantly lit up. If she could not receive her welcome through the dwarves, she would do so with the wizard. He could, perhaps, convince them she was worth it. She brightened considerably, walking more with a bounce in her step.
Kili seemed to think she was strangely excited for setting the table, and he mirrored her, lowering the column onto the floor and grabbing the plate on top. Fili looked over and saw his brother, seeming to recognize the face he was making and turned to Gandalf, gently tugging on his sleeve.
"Forgive me, Master Gandalf, but we should probably move out of the way," he said.
"Right, of course," Gandalf agreed, also seeing what Bluebell couldn't.
"Is everything alr-OH!" Bluebell squeaked, almost dropping the silverware as Kili suddenly started throwing the plates as though they were discs, like the games young Hobbits would play outside, but those objects were made to fly in the wind, not glass plates. "My brother is so going to kill me."
"For what?" Kili asked innocently, continuing the throwing of the plates, all of which landed expertly in front of each chair Fili had set out. There was no chips, no cracks, no jerky sensations that would surely have them toppling from the mountain of a table only to shatter on the hardwood floors. Instead, the table was beautifully covered with each platter until the column was no more. "There, now! Your turn!"
"Right, well, I don't think I'm as good as throwing things as you are, unless books count(although, that was only to help relieve the tension between myself and Lobelia, and I gravely apologized), so I think I'll do this the old-fashioned way," Bluebell said, carefully putting a fork and a knife on either side of each plate. Kili seemed slightly disappointed, but his short attention was soon grabbed by Dwalin who called for help in the kitchen. Looking simply vexatious, he wandered off, leaving Bluebell alone with Fili and Gandalf.
"You really must forgive him," Fili said, looking between the wizard and the Hobbit. "He's as bright as his beard is mighty." With that, he straightened his tunic and rushed to follow Kili to the kitchen, unknowingly doing exactly what Bluebell wished, leaving her alone with Gandalf to talk.
The wizard didn't seem to see Bluebell's determination nor her desperation. Quite the contrary, he seemed completely content in her presence, digging around in his robes and successfully pulling out a pipe. He smiled at Bluebell; he seemed strangely proud of her, more or less like he had expected something dreadful to become of her and since that unknown thing never occurred, he was more than happy to see who she was now, the mad Baggins she was under the care of her elder brother who wanted nothing to do with this journey. And while that thought both annoyed and made her strangely prideful, she was not going to stay that permanent image he's seem to build from her. She was still a Took, and he needed to know as such.
"Will Bilbo be weary of a wizard smoking a pipe?" Gandalf questioned, breaking the awkward silence.
Bluebell shook her head. "I dare say not, seeing as it pales in comparison to what our other guests are doing. Not that I mind. I find the spontaneous chaos rather comforting. Fun as well. These dwarves have proven to me to be a merry gathering, if not a little scarce when it comes to normal Hobbit hospitality."
Gandalf smiled, lighting the pipe with just his finger.
"Oh, they are quite entertaining. It's a shame Bilbo is only seeing what damage they bring to his plumbing."
Bluebell winced. "I dare say once they leave, I will as well. That is, if I'm still here when they do."
Gandalf's expression did not change. He seemed neither curious nor confused at her statement. He did, however, ask, "Are you going somewhere, Miss Bluebell?"
Bluebell hummed, looking down at the table. Seeing one of the forks were crooked, she moved to fix it. Really, she was just finding something to do so she wouldn't have to look Gandalf in the eyes while she popped the question. She truly was a coward. Still toying with the silverware and the plates, she said, "I was hoping...I wouldn't have to be left alone while my brother attends this quest with these dwarves, wondering if he'll ever return." That was definitely an exaggeration, especially since she understood her brother had absolutely no plans at all to go.
To her surprise, Gandalf laughed. Her green eyes snapping forward, she observed Gandalf shrewdly.
"Have I said something funny?" she asked.
"Not necessarily, Bluebell. You just...remind me so much of Belladonna, from your eyes to your face to your mannerisms. I'm sure if I'd come years before and requested your father on such a journey, she'd jump at the chance to attend, too." Gandalf said, blowing a silver ring of smoke from his nose. It was rather impressive, especially since she's seen Bilbo do something similar, but it has never been that big.
"Can I ask you something without it coming off as a jab at yourself?" Bluebell asked, pulling one of the chairs out and taking a seat.
"Of course."
Bluebell took a deep breath, suddenly looking over her shoulder to be sure they weren't being overheard, especially by her brother. She could see him in the pantry speaking very sternly at Dori and Bifur, who were both clutching something to their chests. When she was sure their conversation would remain private, she turned back to Gandalf.
"Why did you ask Bilbo instead of me?" Bluebell asked. "You seem to know me quite well; you understand I mirror much of my mother and her...let's just say for argument's sake, Took-ish tendencies. You understand I've been cooped up here all my life whereas my heart was out there instead. I've yearned to see the impossible, what the world could show me that the Shire could not. Yet you asked my brother, who'd abandoned all of his Took attributes long ago. You know he does not wish to go."
Gandalf was smoking avidly at his pipe. He was no longer staring admirably at Bluebell, but his face did not seem resentful or angry for her feelings. She took that as a good sign. Perhaps he'd see her side and decide she was much more suited for this than Bilbo. He could convince the dwarves and this Thorin she'd make a fantastic addition.
"Bluebell, I could give you all my reasons as to why I had chosen Bilbo for this journey, and I am as sure that you'll find most of them not up to your standards, for you are not angry I asked him, you are only angry I did not ask you. I could have asked both of you and you would be just as excited as you would be if I had only asked you." Gandalf said.
"Yes, that's...obvious," Bluebell said.
"I suppose a shorter list would be all the reasons I didn't ask you."
Bluebell now seemed concerned. "There are reasons you didn't ask me?"
"You figured I did not consider you at all?"
"Well, when you pass me over for my own brother, I-I figured..."
"Bluebell you are so proud of your Took heritage. You have the spirit, the bravery and courage necessary to be a Took, but you forget you are also a Baggins." Gandalf said, though this explanation was far too vague for Bluebell's liking. She went to tell him as such, but he continued, "You are caring, compassionate, and you are completely unapologetic for you know who you are. As a Baggins, you are comfortable, not for the riches of home, but for your dreams, your wishes, something your fellow Hobbits(and let's face it, your brother) would pale at even the hint of it."
"You seem to be giving me all the reasons why I should attend, as both a Took and a Baggins."
"Bluebell, you care too much, is my issue. When you have your mind set on something, that's all there is to it. There are no detours or changes allowed. You want what you want and you care not how you will get it. And when things are taken from you, you become somewhat of a shell of your former being. I will not lie, this quest will not be easy, not for Hobbits and certainly not for those who fixate on things and people. I fear if you lose something, you'll lose yourself entirely, and I will not be held responsible for that," Gandalf said, making Bluebell more confused.
"You fear me losing myself if something were to happen on this journey?" she asked, dumbing it down for herself. He nodded, confirming. "But you will ask for Bilbo instead, who I am entirely sure is not fit for this adventure in the least, if not at all."
"That is where you are wrong. Bluebell, Bilbo is as much a Took as you are a Baggins. His adventurous spirit, while abandoned some time ago, still lays just under the surface, and I do believe this adventure will be good for him, even if he nor you see it that way just yet," Gandalf said, smiling faintly.
"He, but not I?" Bluebell asked, hurt. "You will leave me here in Bag End, taking my brother who knows where?"
Gandalf mumbled quietly, something not decipherable where Bluebell was sitting.
"You think these dwarves a merry gathering?" he suddenly asked.
Bluebell looked behind her, before turning back to the wizard. "Yes, I suppose so."
"You love your brother?"
"Of course I do."
"I foresee you loving these dwarves nearly as much as you love your brother, if you attend this adventure. I see you fitting right in, laughing amongst them, in on all their jokes. But I foresee you losing them. Losing Bilbo. What you could turn into, Bluebell, is not a fair sight, indeed. Your spirit will be broken. You have potential to lose who you are because you fixate so heavily on those you hold dear that just an inkling of ill will for them is enough to tip the scales of your person," Gandalf said, not meeting Bluebell's eyes.
"You don't know me," Bluebell retorts.
"But I do. Bungo Baggins was very much like you, Bluebell. Those dear to him were kept as close as possible, far from the dangers of the world; your mother was no stranger to that, even if Bungo understood her more dangerous attributes. Losing your mother broke him, Bluebell, but you probably know that already," Gandalf whispered, conjuring flashbacks in Bluebell's mind; the way her father was after her mother passed was not a pretty sight. Losing his other half was surely the worst thing to happen to him, which further pushed the idea of Bilbo keeping Bluebell at home at all costs.
But Bluebell was not her father. She understood the pain of loss. Losing her parents had been very difficult, indeed, but she was older now.
"Age does not mean wisdom, I assure you," Gandalf suddenly said, practically reading her mind and making Bluebell sputter indignantly. "I fear for you, Bluebell."
"It is not your place to fear for me," Bluebell mumbled loud enough for him to hear. "You cannot leave me here alone. You cannot dangle such an opportunity right before my eyes, pass me over for my own brother, and leave me here to rot all because you're afraid I won't be able to handle loss. You fear me losing myself. Well, Gandalf, I apologize if this comes off as offensive, but I don't care what you think of me. I've wanted something like this for years. I've dreamed of it, pleaded with my brother to let me go. Instead, I'm regarded as mad. Most Hobbits cannot stand to even look at me. I have no one but Bilbo. I have nothing."
Gandalf slowly shook his head. "That, again, is where you are wrong, Bluebell."
Bluebell could not reply in time, for the room was suddenly being overcrowded with several rowdy dwarves, all shouting over each other and laughing themselves silly. Gloin and Dwalin drug in the pounds of food they had made, which seemed to be everything Bilbo and Bluebell had stored away. Kili and Fili quickly sat on either side of Bluebell, giving her a smile, completely unaware of the conversation she just shared with Gandalf. She wiped away a few stray tears to ensure they would not know the state of her feelings.
"Alrighty, boys, it's time to dig in!" Dwalin barked, holding his arms wide, seemingly very proud of his and Gloin's work. "Gather 'round, you lot! Don't stagger! C'mon!" At once, the remaining of the dwarves sat at the table. Gandalf even made his way over, taking place between Oin and Balin, still smiling at Bluebell, as though he had forgotten all about what they had just spoke about. Bluebell tried her best to keep her mood light. The night was still young; she had plenty of time to badger him until he would give in.
"Here ya are, Miss Bluebell," Bofur called, making her turn. He was holding out an entire turkey leg, the skin slipping off it and surely staining the table with its grease. She was grateful Bilbo didn't seem to be joining them. He would be having several heart attacks. Grabbing the plate in front of her, she held it out, and he happily plopped the leg on top. She smiled, grateful.
"Thank you, and just Bluebell is fine. Formalities make me sound much older than I am," Bluebell said. "Although...it is better than Blueball."
Kili blushed, while Fili laughed.
Some of the dwarves laughed at that. Soon, it was easy for Bluebell to forget completely what she was so stressful about. Being in the company of the dwarves made her forget all that troubled her. They were gruff, unhygienic, and they were quite improper. They were the perfect house guests, in Bluebell's opinion. Most fell in easy conversation with her, not at all bothered at having a Hobbit lass in their mix.
Kili and Fili were joking with her, almost as if they had known her for years. They laughed, clapped her on the back, even playfully pulled her hair when she wasn't looking or snatching slices of the sausage she had on her plate. She had happily shoved an apple into both of their mouths at that, to which the dwarves howled with boisterous guffawing. She had looked over her shoulder from time to time, worried for her brother's state.
He was standing helplessly outside of the pantry, seeming to be at a loss of what to do. She thought of getting up to go help him, but she was suddenly pulled back to the table with Fili calling her name.
"So we know now the status of you to Mister Baggins, not as his wife, but as his sister!" he exclaimed. "You must tell us if there's a Hobbit running about in the Shire with your name on his mind!"
Bluebell grimaced, shoving his face into his mashed potatoes.
"I have not." she answered when he reemerged, his face covered. "Hobbit lads and I don't really go hand in hand, not when most of them find me mad."
"You are mad, lass?" Bofur called from across the table.
"I haven't given it much thought," Bluebell said truthfully. "I'd like to say no, but I find the company of dwarves far more bearable and, rather, delightful in comparison to my kind, so maybe they've got one thing right of me." Some of the dwarves cheered at that. Dwalin and Gloin glared disapprovingly, however. Clearly, they did not feel the same in turn. No matter. Bluebell was used to not being well liked.
The chatter went on. Fili had successfully squashed the remainder of Bluebell and Kili's meal with his boots after trying to distribute jugs of ale from the barrel he and Kili had carried into the dining room. Bofur had proven to have excellent aim after throwing an entire wad of food directly into Bombur's waiting mouth, who was on the complete opposite side of the table. Bluebell had revealed a few more of her hidden talents by juggling five hardboiled eggs in her hands and landing two of the five in her mouth, while the remaining three splattered on the already messy table.
Soon there was nothing left to salvage. The plates were wiped clean, the only hint of there being food at all being the stains left on their dishes. The dwarves were all settling their bellies elsewhere, around their home. Bluebell had managed to catch her brother after exiting the bathroom, which she did not get to use because the dwarves had all but destroyed the plumbing. But she did freshen up in the mirror.
Bilbo seemed exasperated as she opened the door. He had looked as though he were about to knock.
"You seem comfortable," he said stuffily.
Bluebell smiled guiltily. "They truly aren't so bad when you give them a chance."
"Are you completely unaware of what they're doing to our house?"
"Not at all, Bilbo, but let's be honest, they're all fixable." Bluebell assured, before grabbing one of his hands. "Are you okay? I haven't seen you all night. I'm worried for you."
"Do not baby me," Bilbo said, taking his hand back. "You shouldn't have to worry about me."
"I can't help it. You're all strung out. Do you want me to get you some wine? Take a little bit of the edge off? I think there's some left. Dwarves think it's too feminine for them. Cowards," Bluebell smiled, trying to crack a joke, but there wasn't even a hint of a smile on her brother's features. She decided to change the subject. "I've spoken to Gandalf."
Bilbo was confused. "Spoken to Gandalf? What do you mean, you've spoken to Gandalf?"
"I just...perhaps hinted that I would like to attend the quest," Bluebell mumbled, averting eye contact.
Bilbo would not have that. He grasped her chin and forced her to look up at him.
"You did not..."
"Oh, keep your trousers on," Bluebell huffed, pulling away. "He denied me."
Bilbo sighed, relieved.
"But that doesn't mean I can't try again." Bluebell declared, grinning with determination. Bilbo slumped. "Oh, Bilbo, could you not imagine it, even a little? The two of us could go together. It would be fun! You and I...Bilbo, think of the things we could see. The books we read pale in comparison to what's out there. Hell, we could write our own stories! And they'd be true!"
"How much ale have you had?"
Bluebell pouted. "Bilbo, this is something we both have wanted. You did, too, years ago. You could want it again. We would not even need to leave permanently. We could always return to Bag End following the conclusion of this quest." She may have stretched the truth there at the end. She genuinely had no intention of returning to Bag End at the end of this adventure. Instead, she figured she'd go off on her own, make her own discoveries. She even dreamed of Bilbo going with her. What a treat that would be, she and her brother doing what they wanted, free from the disapproving eyes of their kind. Bluebell was so sure they'd have fun. "I know what we talked of earlier, brother. But I also know if I turned this all away without even trying, I will regret it for the rest of my life, the rest of my life which will be spent within these walls doing the same thing over and over again."
Bilbo stared at her. His expression was, for once in his life, unreadable. He neither frowned nor smiled, his eyes neither glared nor widened in delight as they normally did when he was excited for something or other. At last, he suddenly pulled Bluebell into an embrace, something she wasn't expecting, but she did not reject it. She wrapped her arms around him in turn, chastising herself for tonight's actions. She had been more selfish than usual, leaving her brother to suffer with all these guests while she not only laughed with them, but helped them. She truly was not a good sister, but Bilbo had to know she was sorry.
"You are foolish," Bilbo mumbled.
"That goes without saying," Bluebell laughed. At last, they released each other. "But you are just as foolish as I, you only manage to hide it better."
"But you are not as clever as I."
"And you are not nearly as cheeky as you think," Bluebell retorted, flicking him across the forehead. He grunted, glared, and did the same back to her. With them flicking each other repeatedly, they noticed not the wizard suddenly pass them, smiling amusedly, before continuing along, listening to the long drivel of Bifur's story. Bluebell wondered if he could understand him.
The siblings stopped at last when Bluebell was called by Kili and Fili to the dining room. Giving her brother one last flick across his ear, she trotted off. She could hear him traveling through the halls, trying to see what the dwarves were up to since he hadn't been looking over their shoulders for the minutes he spared speaking to his sister. Clearly, they got up to a lot when unattended.
Fili had invited Bluebell to finish off Bilbo's strawberry cheesecake that he had been saving for a special occasion. She, armed with a fork, tore greedily into it while Kili patted his rounded belly, for he was too full for dessert. The dining room was deserted, spare for a few dwarves still conversing in a language, Bluebell didn't understood. She would ask, but she did not want to appear rude.
When Fili had shoveled the last strawberry into his mouth, the two of them leaned back in their chairs, caressing their stomachs and mirroring Kili. They were both stuffed.
"So...you and Gandalf?" Fili suddenly asked, breaking the comfortable silence. Bluebell opened one eye, squinting at the blond as he observed her curiously. "You made it exceptionally obvious you wanted to be alone with him to speak your mind. I'm only curious. You don't have to tell me."
Bluebell chewed the inside of her cheek. She hadn't expected him to notice, but now that he has, what was she to do? He made it clear he would be fine if she did not tell him what was said, but would that not be more suspicious? What could be so bad she wouldn't tell the dwarf? Bluebell quickly reminded herself that the leader of this company, who has still yet to arrive, was Fili's uncle. A bright, selfish idea entered her mind. Perhaps if she brought it up to his nephew, Fili could convince his uncle to let Bluebell go with. If she could not get through to Gandalf, this Thorin was probably her best bet.
"I was actually...asking him if...I could go with you all." Bluebell said at last, keeping quiet so only he and Kili could hear. She did not need flies on the wall.
Fili choked, making Bluebell flinch. Coughing furiously, he pounded the front of his chest, while Fili slapped him repeatedly across the back, trying to get him to calm down. Onlookers, or just those also at the table, stared in bewilderment as Fili tried to catch his breath. He was definitely not expecting what Bluebell had to say.
"You...you what?" Fili asked at last, his voice hoarse.
Bluebell frowned. "I asked if I could attend this quest. If my brother refuses, I could replace him. And if he were to go, I could work beside him."
"But you're a lass," Kili said.
"That's a problem?" Bluebell asked, affronted.
"In dwarf cases, no, but," Fili quickly added on, seeing Bluebell about to argue, "you're a Hobbit lass. Different circumstances. You've never fought."
"Neither has my brother, and yet suddenly he's expected to pack up and run along with you."
"And he's a lad," Kili chirped, clearly unaware of Bluebell's quickly rising anger.
"I'm glad to see your priorities are straight. My brother is perfectly welcome in risking and possibly losing his life from lack of experience, but all things considered, his parts are different from mine. Much less scandalous," Bluebell hissed, her green eyes narrowed to slits. "For Eru's sake, I am just as capable with a much more willing heart, thank you!"
"I am sure, and I'd be glad to agree," Fili said, clearly lying, "but it's not up to me."
"It's up to Uncle, and he'd never agree to taking a female." Kili answered. "It's why Mother could not attend, even when she's got enough muscle on her to keep any enemy at bay. You are...quite soft."
Bluebell grumbled incoherently. Then she thought for a moment. "So if I were to appeal to your Uncle Thorin..."
"I wouldn't bother. I've told you already Thorin doesn't like to beat around the bush, and he'll not waste time arguing with you," Fili said. "I doubt he'll be much excited about Mister Baggins either."
Bluebell bit her lip. "But...but if I could..."
Kili shrugged. "I don't see it happenin', Bluebell, to be honest."
Bluebell sighed, sinking down in her chair. She didn't want to think this hopeless. That wasn't who she was. This Thorin sounded right annoying, if he was truly not willing to hear her case. Bluebell tried not to think to hard on the misogyny of dwarves. After all, deep down she knew they were right. She had never fought a day in her life. At least, not in the sense of warriors. She had gotten into a few tiffs with Hobbits that said the wrong thing under their breath about her. She has never raised a blade, never shot an arrow, never used a hammer or axe in a threatening manner. She looked down at herself. She really was soft.
"Hey," Fili spoke softly, suddenly grabbing her hand. She looked up at him. "We're not trying to make you feel inadequate, Bluebell, truly. We just know Thorin, and we don't want to see you get hurt. But...if this is what you really want, I say go for it. Why not? What could hurt? The worst he could say is no."
"That's not true," Kili mumbled. Fili shot him a glare. "What? I'm right!"
"I don't think it will work, so don't go off thinking I told you this just to get your hopes up, but I admire your determination. Who knows? Perhaps you will join us. Make it all the more interesting for me and Kili." Fili assured, smiling softly.
Kili mirrored him, bobbing his head enthusiastically.
"Excuse me," a voice called from the hall. The two turned to see Ori at Bilbo's side, who appeared as angry as he had been before he spoke with Bluebell. She was also surprised to see he was displaying such a fit in front of Gandalf, who he had been previously speaking to. Ori stood awkwardly across from her brother, clutching his empty platter. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but what should I do with my plate?"
Fili got up from his seat, confidently striding over. Kili smirked, and he followed, slipping out the door and inching his way toward the kitchen. Bluebell was curious, following Fili and standing just behind him.
"Here you go, Ori, give it to me," Fili said, taking the plate from his hands. Suddenly, he chucked it over to Kili, who caught it with ease. Bluebell squeaked in surprise, covering her mouth. And suddenly, plates and bowls were being tossed over her head from the table behind her, Fili catching and continuing their journey to Kili, who had thrown them into the kitchen where Bluebell hoped someone else was catching them.
"Excuse me!" Bilbo loudly protested. "That's my mother's Westfarthing pottery! It's over a hundred years old!"
Bluebell heard a beat behind her, turning to see the dwarves still sitting were now hitting the silverware to the table, clattering them together in a sort of musical beat. She smiled, humored.
"And...and could you not do that?" Bilbo asked, appearing beside her. "You'll blunt them!"
"Oh? You hear that lads, he said we'll blunt the knives!" Bofur cheekily said.
"Blunt the knives, bend the forks!" Kili suddenly began to sing with a surprisingly good voice.
"Smash the bottles and burn the corks!" Fili continued.
"Chip the glasses and crack the plates!" all of the dwarves chorused, making Bluebell giggle into her hand, trying to keep it hidden from Bilbo.
She squeaked suddenly, when a platter suddenly ended up in her hands. The music had stopped at once, and all of the dwarves, including Bilbo, stared at her, waiting to see what she'd do. Even Gandalf, who was puffing on his pipe, looked rather bemused. Bluebell bit her lip, before grinning at Bilbo, and tossed the platter right over her head. She heard Fili catch it and grinned. The dwarves cheered.
"That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!" she continued, hugging her brother close, while he groaned.
"Cut the cloth and tread on the fat! Leave the bones on the bedroom-mat! Pour the milk on the pantry floor, splash the wine on every door, dump the crocks in a boiling bowl, pound them up with a thumping pole! When you're finished, if any are whole! Send them down the hall to roll!" the dwarves and Bluebell sang, all the while Bilbo tried to interfere with the tossing and throwing to no avail. "THAT'S WHAT BILBO BAGGINS HATES!"
Bilbo and Bluebell found themselves in the kitchen, staring down into the sink where all the dishes now laid, sparkly clean thanks to Bifur. Bilbo gazed in awe, whereas Bluebell threw her head back to laugh in delight.
The good spirits and joyous laughter cut off immediately when they heard an intimidating three knocks on the door.
"He is here," Gandalf said darkly, and Bluebell knew instantly who he spoke of.