Author's Note: I am very sorry for the long wait on this chapter. I don't want to make any excuses on this, but I guess I wanted to focus on my other story and this one got left behind. Also I had massive writer's block. Still, I did it and got this chapter done. I want to try and get this story done, as I want to work on my next long story I have planned, and believe me it's a good one, but I can't really say much. Anyway, Enjoy.

Chapter 23: Lingering Doubt

*Knock* *Knock*

The knock on wood sounded loudly, before a few moments later the front door opened, Hiccup being the one to answer it. The teen being alone within the house, except for Toothless. Upon hearing it he sighed in slight irritation. As much as he didn't want to answer it, he didn't want to be rude, and knew whoever it was is there to see him…and more. It wasn't a guess, more of a fact. He's correct as behind the door were a couple of Vikings from town, each one of them holding a covered-up basket, with smiles on their faces.

"Hi," Hiccup greeted, forcing a smile upon his face.

"Greetings Hiccup," the first Viking greeted, being respectful of the tribe's heir. "Stoick told us you weren't feeling the best, so we hope you're doing well."

"Thanks dad," Hiccup responded back in his mind, glad his father made up an excuse for his continued absence from the general populace. "Y-Yeah…but I'm doing ok."

"Well…we brought gifts for you," the second one responded back, holding up the basket as a delicious aroma came from it.

"T-Thank you," was all Hiccup could say in response, when in his mind he sighed. Still, not wanting to be rude, he reached out and took the first basket. Toothless padded up and saw his rider's arms filled so he went over and took the second basket, which thankfully had a handle so he can clamp onto.

"No, thank you for all you did for us," the first one responded back with a sincere expression.

"We know it was a team effort from you and the riders, but we know you came up with the plan," the second one responded. "My children can rest easily thanks to you."

"It wasn't really a problem," Hiccup tried to dismiss, but they wouldn't have it.

"Still…we're in your debt."

"Hope you feel better soon, everyone will feel a lot safer knowing you were up and about," the last voice said, which nearly made Hiccup flinch some. Thankfully, he kept his composer, and didn't falter as both Vikings finished before biding their heir a farewell, turning and walking off to return to their duties. Hiccup stood in the doorway for a while longer, trying to be polite and hold the expression before closing the door fully. Finally, once in the confines of his home he sighed deeply, allowing his face to fall…really troubled by what was said, still he tried not to think of it. Turning around he moved a few feet to the side and placed the basket down…

With the rest of them.

Yup, before the teen were many more baskets, all of them containing foods, or other goodies from the villagers…all of which were a thanks from them all. Which he had accumulated over the last few days. All of it ranged from fish to pies, bread, blankets, and more…all for him. To think all of this started due to Snotlout and his mother, as they delivered them lunch. All of which seemed to have gotten the ball rolling with everyone else doing the same, but with different items. He was appreciative of the villagers generosity, but could see it was bothering Hiccup, but his son just decided to accept them to not be rude, as they didn't seem to be ending.

Hiccup sighed, feeling a bit guilty at accepting all these gifts, feeling that he isn't deserving of them, as they could go to better use…but he didn't want to be rude and turn these gifts away as they were thoughtful…and he didn't want to seem like he didn't return their gratefulness…still, they all kept piling up.

Another day had passed since he and his father talked some more, the teen declaring that he's not a hero, and doesn't deserve the praise he's getting. Stoick kept trying to convince him otherwise, but his son was set in on this, that all the chief could do is try and comfort him the best he could, which is helping some. Afterwards he then decided to help his child clean up his room, due to Hiccup not having that many possessions, the room was picked up in no time, restoring it to its original state. Even afterwards Hiccup wanted to remain inside, by himself to deal with his thoughts, the teen still not feeling up to leaving the house so far. Something Stoick respected as he didn't want to force his son to do anything he didn't want to at the moment, deciding to take things slow.

Well, another day came and Stoick wanted to stay with his son longer but was urged by the teen that it was alright, that others needed him. After asking repeatedly if it was ok the chief left, but still said he would check in on him now and then, which was appreciated. Yet throughout the day he kept getting knocks at the door with people giving him gifts, this having to be the latest one.

Another sigh left his mouth as he looked at the pile yet eyed his dragon sniffing at one of the baskets filled with fish. Smiling, Hiccup petted his dragon and pulled the fish forward, "Go ahead bud."

The dragon smiled as he started to gobble down the fish, glad to be having a meal. Good thing the fish was for the Nighty Fury, as cod being his favorite.

Walking away from the pile Hiccup went over to the brazier, sitting down in the chair next to it. He picked up one of the spar logs and tossed inside the dying flame, which roared back to life in a matter of seconds. Both hands reached out towards the flames, slowly being warmed by the renewed heat, comforting the teen some. Having a fire now was a huge comfort, something he no longer took for granted. Being out in the forest he was forced to endure the chilly weather outside while on the run. Fire being a luxury he couldn't afford in risk being spotted, not matter how chilled to the bone he got. So, sitting by the fire helped eased those feelings, even if it was for a brief respite.

Many thoughts were running through his mind as he was contemplating on what to do next. Truth be told he was getting bored being inside all day, as he was running out of things to do. Yet, thankfully he has Toothless here for company, as his dragon made a great companion. The Night Fury being so in tuned with his emotions, helping him when he's down. Still, even his dragon could only sate his boredom or so long. He would need to go out sooner or later, but he just doesn't feel ready to confront the town after all he went through. Just…not yet.

Besides, it would take something important in order to get him to go out and all.

*Knock* Knock*

His head perked towards the door, sighing for a moment as he knew what it could be. He wasn't in the mood for anymore gifts, but he rather not turn them away. He hoped this would be the last one, but knowing his luck it wouldn't be. Getting up he walked over towards the door and pulled it open, both eyes peering out, yet rose in surprise at who's behind it, "A-Astrid?"

Indeed, the blond Viking stood in front of Hiccup, a bit relieved and concern upon her face as she too holding a small basket in her arms, "Hey Hiccup…"

"H-Hey," is all he could say in response, as a small bit of awkwardness filled the area. Whatever words he would normally say stuck in his throat and wouldn't come out no matter what.

"Um…h-how are you feeling?" Astrid then asked, at least she wanted to know where his head is at the moment. Still concerned as she, nor the others, haven't seen him ever since the fighting ended. Most of them worried about his mental state, and if he was ok in general, but didn't approach him, as they opted to give him space for the time being. Yet, finding an opportunity to go to his household, she jumped at the chance, and is relieved to see him.

"I'm…ok, for the most part," Hiccup responded as he reached up and rubbed the back of his head. His answer was vague, but he felt like that was all he could say at the moment. Making the situation that much awkward for them as he tried to find another thing to say…that is until his eyes were trained back onto the basket she was holding. "W-What's that you have?"

"Oh," Astrid remembered as she held it out. "My mom decided to make you one of her special pastries…as a thank you. I said I would deliver it to you."

Hiccup smiled at that, a genuine smile, instead of the forced ones he usually had to put on. The thought itself was good, plus he knew Astrid's mother always made good pastries. Plus, coming from Astrid was a refreshing change, that he would accept this one, mainly as his friend was delivering it. "Thanks Astrid...it's thoughtful of her," the teen responded as he reached and gently took the basket in hand.

The silence lingered on for a moment longer, Astrid able to rub the back of her head with her free hand, trying to see how to go about this next part. She had been worried about Hiccup for all of yesterday, and now seeing him before her relieved the stress. Still, she chose to deliver the basket for a reason, and hoped to talk with him some more, if he would allow it. "Um...Hiccup...do you mind...if I come in for a bit?"

The one-legged raised an eye at that, effectively silencing him for a bit. To be honest having it just being himself and Toothless was just fine for the time being...yet, after all he has been through having one of his friends over could help improve his mood...yet he knew from experience that Astrisd would want to ask more about if he was ok or not...and he wasn't sure about answering it. Still...like before he would have to go back out eventually, and maybe talking with her will help. Small steps after all.

"Sure...come on in," Hiccup nodded as he stepped out of the way,

Astrid mentally sighed in relief upon being granted at this request, and proceeded to step inside, the door being closed behind her. She looked around the small house, noting that nothing that things were cleaned up, a sight that every home on Berk faced. Everything looked pretty much the same...well except for the stack of baskets that were nearby, making her eyes raise, "Whoa, did the villagers bring you all those?"

"Yeah," Hiccup responded bashfully, going over to the table and putting the basket down upon it. "It's their way of thanking me for everything I did apparently."

The blond Viking nodded, turning back to her friend, "Yeah, the villagers are very grateful for what we did...we all received similar gifts and thanks from them, yet it seems like you are getting the most attention," she said with a smile. Which is true, as far as she knew it she and the other riders received gifts as well, but usually it was a basket or two, yet Hiccup seemed to be getting the most out of it. Yet, part of her was glad to see her leader is getting recognition for all the work he did.

Now that caught Hiccup's interest, turning to look over at his friend, "R-Really?"

She nodded back, "Many are grateful for what we all have done."

"That's good to hear...mainly It wasn't just me out there, it took all of us to free Berk," Hiccup downplayed, glad to hear he wasn't the primary focus of the praise. Yet, it seems like he was receiving the most of it.

"And it's a team effort cleaning things up," Astrid added in, taking a seat down to join her leader. "Everyone is helping out, always on the move and even helping out with jobs they don't normally do."

Hiccup nodded at this, surprised at this piece of news, but he shouldn't be surprised at all. When it came down to it all the Vikings of Berk would come together as all hands would be on deck. Working together to accomplish a common goal. It just showed how much they were united together, and would tackle a problem together in order to solve it…yet, the more he thought about it some guilt started to swell up, knowing that he's not contributing to the restoration effort. "I'm...sorry I'm not out there helping...believe me I would be…"

"It's alright," the blond responded softly, surprised at the response. Why would he be apologizing? After all Hiccup did, he would need a rest, and after everything she heard him confess to of course he would need time to sort through things. "We all understand, the rest of the Riders understand...besides after all you've been through, I know you may not be in the right state of mind."

"You can say that again," Hiccup softly responded, leaning back in his seat, but then looked back up to the basket that was brought over. Deciding to change the topic he opened it up. "Want some?"

Astrid smiled at the offer and knew she couldn't resist, "Sure." Both reached into the basket and pulled out what looked like apple turnovers, except these were small squares, but were filled with apple filling. A specialty of Astrid's mother as she made them on special occasions and were a delicious treat for anyone who received them. Hiccup took a bite of one and happily chewed on it as flavor burst into his mouth, "Mmmm...this is so good."

"I know, my mom knows how to bake," Astrid agreed as she enjoyed it as well. The both of them enjoying this small moment between them, Hiccup especially. The one-legged teen then grabbed one and tossed one up in the air, which Toothless snatched up with easily.

"I think Toothless approves as well," he smiled, seeing his dragon gobble it down happily.

"I guess these can sate dragons as well," Astrid smiled as she kept eating, enjoying the small moment and glad to see Hiccup feeling and acting well. Yet that was the problem. From experience she knew that what she saw could be a front. The one-legged teen could be so good at hiding his real emotions, putting on a fake mask of happiness. Yet, others could be seeing this, but at rare times she would be able to see underneath it. And since they were alone, now would be a better chance than ever to try and see the truth and help him. "Hiccup…are you sure…you're, ok?"

"Hmm?" Hiccup stopped smiling as he looked over at her. Only to see concern upon her face. Instantly he could tell what she is hinting to, but didn't respond, not initially. Part of himself didn't want to say anything, but other than Toothless and his father Astrid was another person he can confide in. Express his real emotions without consequence…yet, he did want to be open with everyone about how he felt, especially after all he had been through. Yet sometimes getting a different perspective was nice, it could help, but wasn't sure what could come from it. Still, having help was always comfort, something he would need. Sighing deeply, he placed his hand down, feeling a bit of nuzzling from his dragon. Which helped some. "It's…on and off right now. At some moments I feel fine, but others…well, you know."

"I see," Astrid nodded, starting to understand what he meant. Still, it made questions swell up within her, but she didn't want to cross any boundaries, so she needed to choose them carefully. "A-Are you sleeping at least?" That is something else that is important to know. Remembering the state Hiccup was in when they arrived at Berk. The distraught and brokenness he was in…and how he managed to feel better after sleeping.

"I-I am," Hiccup nodded slowly, briefly closing his eyes and clenching his hands repeatedly as in the darkness of his eyelids, could see the cold, lifeless eyes of everyone he killed. All of them were just looking at him. His body trembled slightly as he took a few deep breaths, before opening them, allowing those faces to disappear. "I…I do have nightmares, about everything. But dad has been helping me." He left out the part where he had been allowed to sleep in his dad's bed, finding that a bit embarrassing.

Astrid is silent at that, not sure what to say at this moment. She never killed anyone before, Hel not even a dragon, she had no idea what her friend would be going through. Still, it didn't mean she wasn't going to stop helping. It'll be tricky, but she knows she can help. Reaching out she carefully placed a hand on his shoulder, making sure he saw it first. "It'll be alright…You'll be fine. Time will help you."

"I know…it's just…hard," Hiccup said slowly, eyes looking down at the table. Soon enough he shook his head and sighed, his mind going to the overall picture of things. "Everyone sees my deeds as heroic, killing all those Berserkers and Outcasts as part of a Viking's life, and how it was considered a testament of a Viking's strength. Many celebrate it by taking a trophy as a reminder of their victory…With me I…I…I don't even want to remember any single one of it. Every single kill I accumulated haunts me, despite being justified in taking their lives. I see their faces every time I close my eyes. How can killing be a norm to a Viking life if…if…"

"Hey, hey, it's alright," the female kept rubbing her friend's shoulder, seeing some anxiety making itself known. "You came out of things ok; you're still standing after all."

"Believe me, I'm already having trouble doing so…the killing was hard enough, but now couple that with everything that has happened and…and…"

Astrid was silent, not sure what to say as Hiccup didn't finish his sentence, as he wasn't able to. All the steam seemed to be lost as it was like he didn't want to finish it at all. She didn't blame him at all. She waited a bit longer for him to calm down before responding, "Is…Is that why you're holding up in here?"

"K-Kind of," Hiccup's head lowered down once more. "I'm just…I'm just not ready to face anyone else yet…just…being out there and hearing their praise…ones that I don't deserve."

"Hiccup, come on, don't think like that," Astrid tried to reassure, not knowing his state of mind was like that. "I know it was a team effort, but you did most of it and-"

"That's not it Astrid," Hiccup cut her off, with a shake of his head. Surprising her with raised eyes. "Everyone will be looking at me, most considering me a hero…but I'm not…I'm not a hero, everything I did leading up to helping them isn't heroic…not if they found out about the truth…about the breakdown I had…"

Astrid was silent after that, now understanding, recalling to the broken state he was in when the Riders and her found him. Most Vikings never been in such a state, that she was aware of, yet Hiccup was close to having a meltdown. Not the typical picture of a hero. She started to get a picture of what he's feeling, even though she had no idea of what the full picture is like. "Ok…I get it…but Hiccup, you can't hide in here forever. What's done is done…Now you just have to go on living and be glad you're still here with us."

"But how? How can I face everyone? Most will be happy to see me around, but I will know the truth…Especially after such a huge decision I made…one that could make them question me as heir?" Hiccup questioned, looking over at Astrid with uncertainty.

"You just do it…you've done it before, even in the past before the war ended. Back when you were…forgive me for saying this, being called useless. You still managed to walk around the village, despite what everyone else thought about you at the time. This may not be the same thing, but it's similar. Either way, you have nothing to be ashamed of."

"How?" Hiccup couldn't help but ask, surprised.

"Hiccup, not just anyone can survive in the forest while being chased by many others. Not to be mean, but especially with your stature," The one-legged teen raised an eye, knowing she meant about his small body. "You avoided them long enough, even killed to stay safe. Now I know it was something you didn't want to do, but you managed to come through still standing. It speaks leaps and bounds about your ability to survive. Despite being in a bad place mentally, you still managed to make a plan for us all. Not only that you and Toothless managed to beat Dagur and save everyone here. You may deny it, but you're a hero to me, to many others on Berk. You may not want to see it, but you are…and you shouldn't be ashamed of anything. Even after all the negatives that you went through."

Hiccup was stunned at Astrid's words, not able to find words to respond back as he digested that information. She did make a lot of good points, and Astrid never did go wrong when trying to make him see the light in certain situations. Her words helped some...but there were still some lingering doubts within him about the situation.

"I...I just...have conflicted feelings about all this," is all he could say. "But I really do appreciate it."

"I get it...you still need time to process everything," she responded with a sigh, but knew that she couldn't automatically get through to her friend this easily, not after everything that transpired. As much as she wanted to stay longer and help further, she knew she had to get back to the work that was assigned to her, but still was glad she managed to help in some way. "Hiccup, I'm sorry to cut this short but I need to get back to work."

Hiccup nodded, "I understand...still Astrid, thank you for stopping by it helped."

She smiled at that, "Of course Hiccup...I'll be around if you need another."

"I would like that," the teen smiled back, watching as his friend got up and walked over towards the door. She opened it, but stopped and looked back, remembering something that could help some more…yet also make things worse. Still, she had to say it. "Oh yeah, one more thing. Gobber said he wanted to see you."

"Oh, he did? About what?" Hiccup's interest piqued.

"He wouldn't say, just that he wanted to see you."

"Well, I'm here as he can come anytime," Hiccup responded back, not really seeing an issue with the visit.

"Actually, he's busy at the forge, being swamped with work. He said he would need you to come to him," Astrid responded, making Hiccup's eyes raise up in surprise.

"Out...side?" he said softly as he couldn't help but gulp.

"Yes, he said to take your time with it, but also said you might like what he had to see you about," Astrid responded back, but without saying another word, exited the home, closing the door. "Bye Hiccup."

"Bye...Astrid," was all the teen could say as he was left alone with his dragon, standing in place and looking at the door.

"You ok? I don't like how you're staring off like that," Toothless nuzzled his rider.

A sigh came out of his mouth as a hand went up and rubbed his face, "Cold move Gobber...cold move," he responded, knowing the full truth to all this.

Gobber is intentionally trying to get Hiccup to come out of his home and integrate back into the village.

All Hiccup knew is that his mentor was being smart about this.

A/N: Hope you like, I know there is a lot of talking and not much action but this is what I envisioned happening, mainly as I had to change things up a lot. Still, one thing for sure is that Gobber seemed to be the only one who can get Hiccup to come out, as he knows the teen's playbook. Still the story is almost done, just two or three more left for this. I appreciate all those who waited for the story, and are still following. All comments are welcomed as I like hearing feedback. Till next time.