She wandered into the communal kitchen and made a bee-line for the Keurig, thanking the Gods that Tony's dollars and caffeine habit had afforded the team a freakishly quick machine.
"So, I hear you're our latest psych case," Tony jeered at her, extending a full mug in her direction. "I thought that was Mr. Green and Angry's role. What will her do now?"
"Coming from the raging alcoholic and sex addict?" She accepted the cup, rolling her eyes at his remarks.
"If you're having trouble with panic attacks, I'm sure the SHIELD therapists would be happy to" Bruce was cut off by a silent glare from Natasha and he raised his hands in defeat.
"If there's something we need to do to avenge you, Lady Natasha, you must tell us." Thor said between bites of what must have been his fifth Poptart of the morning. Steve nodded his head, agreeing with Thor's sentiment, but not adding his own commentary to the discussion.
"Anyway," Tony started. "You look like shit and Legolas was all concerned about you, so when are you guys going to admit you've been boning nonstop?"
"Tony," Clint said in a warning tone. Tony quickly took his coffee to the elevator in headed to the lab to work on yet another iteration of his Iron Man suit. Clint followed Tony with his eyes, daring him to make another comment before turning his attention to Natasha. "You really should eat something, Tash. Then, you can come up to the roof with me to talk about this morning."
Natasha unceremoniously drained the rest of her mug and set it in the sink, "I'm ready whenever you are, Hawk."
They walked slowly, in an uncomfortable silence to the roof, where they would have some privacy from the other men in the group. When they reached the roof, Clint perched himself on the side of the building, legs dangling over the edge and bow laid next to him. Natasha sat on the other side, cross-legged and waiting expectantly.
"Tash, what happened?"
"I think I kicked your ass, Barton." She laughed, playing it off as just another sparring match where she had bested him.
"Natasha," his tone was warning, but his eyes were smiling. He felt like he had his partner back, as she seemed so much more like the woman he knew than the one he had seen that morning. He was happy that she seemed to be doing okay, but wasn't entirely convinced. "Were you back in the Red Room?"
"Barton, we really don't need to talk about this."
"Yes, we do Nat. You never talk to anyone about this. You've told me some of it, sure, but never all of it and it's not good for you to keep that shit to yourself. I know what happened was… bad. But I can help if you just let me!"
"To be honest, Clint, it's none of your damn business."
"You almost killed me!" His voice and anger were rising now and he stood up, stepping off the edge and back onto the flat plane of the roof.
"Almost! I never would have hurt you."
"You've killed innocents before!" He regretted it the instant he said it, but that didn't stop the hurt that crossed her eyes immediately.
"That was a low blow, Barton." She stormed back inside as he called her name after her for the second time that day. Then, he returned to the roof, pacing back and forth about what to do next. Seconds later, Tony appeared on the roof, complaining about how JARVIS had woken him up from his nap and how this better be good. By this point, Clint had angry tears rolling down his cheeks which stopped Tony in his tracks because he had never seen Clint cry before.
"Woah," he said calmly. "What is going on? The little assassin locked herself on her floor and now you're crying on the roof, is this a real-life version of a soap opera?"
"I need you to tell me everything you've figured out about Tasha's time in the Red Room. Files, JARVIS's intel, anything you have." Tony faltered in his step, considering his options. This would be a complete and total breach of Natasha's privacy, but on the other hand, Tony didn't have much more than Clint probably already knew.
"Come down to my lab, we can talk there."
They walked quickly to the elevator and tried to stop on Natasha's floor, finding it still locked. They asked JARVIS if she was okay and he responded that he was forbidden from giving any details, but that she was alive and in no immediate, life-threatening danger. Tony silently thanked himself for coding JARVIS with an unreachable backup feature that allowed him to know of life-threatening emergencies despite any restrictions placed by any member of the team. When Tony and Clint arrived in the lab, they sat at a desk in front of a large screen, where Tony would display the information he had found, which he kept in a coded folder, "WRBN." It did not escape Clint that there was most likely a file for his information, but that was a point of discussion for another day.
The first file in Natasha's folder was titled "SHIELD" and contained no important information that Clint did not already know - her mission reports, how she came to be a SHIELD agent, certification dates, her agent number and clearances, and medical conditions which SHIELD had treated her for in the past, which he skipped as it felt like an invasion of privacy and would likely not reveal much as she despised the med bay and had only been there three times, all of which Clint was present for, except for her initial "lady" exam. The next file was of her pre-Red Room history; loving parents, Alisa and Leonid Romanov, died in a house fire leaving a three year old, Natalia, who was presumed dead alongside her parents by Russian authorities. A photo of Natalia before the fire was in the file, as well as immunization and basic medical records, a pre-school enrollment record for the year of the fire, and an acceptance letter to an early ballet school named the Red Swan Program.
"That's how she was scouted." Tony informed Clint. "Her parents wanted to enroll her in ballet, just like any other girl her age and so she had been taken to a ballet 'exam' for placement into a class. Her parents were told she showed talent and she was accepted to a scam program. Her parents mailed in an application," he pulls up a photocopy of the application. "They listed their home address, when the parents are typically home, and a few other details hey should have left blank that made it easy for the Red Room to get her."
Anger was growing on Clint's face. Of course, her parents could not have known this was a scam, especially so many years ago when people were much more trusting, but he could not helping placing some of the blame on them.
The last file was labelled Red Room and was the largest by far. Medical records, photos, mission reports, and more littered the contents, all scanned crudely with some detailed intentionally cut off or black out by ink stains.
Name: Natalia Romanov
Age at Extraction: 3
Immunizations: All
Weight: 13 kg (28.7 lbs)
Height: 90 cm (2 ft 11 inches)
Notes: Natalia will be raised by Mother Aliana until age 5, when she will begin her training with the new class of eleven recruits her age. Shows promise in ballet and will take classes prior to beginning her true training regime.
First Mission Age: 6
Mission: Cherry Blossom
Status: Success
Fatalities: 2 (Intended: 1)
Method: Gunshot
There were hundreds of similar reports, some with information manually redacted. The photographs included headshots of Natasha at each year she spent in the Red Room, several during ballet recitals, and one disturbing photo taken with her facing away from the camera, sitting on a bed in a state of undress, one arm chained to the top and a sheet wrapped around her body. Clint had not realized that the girls were not given clothing to sleep in, though he knew of being handcuffed to the beds.
"She was used as a lethal weapon. A very lethal weapon, from as young as she can probably remember. I think she's entitled to a little panic attack every now and then." Tony said, closing the file and facing his teammate.
"This was different," he said simply before leaving the room. In his head, he silently added "this was dangerous" to the end of his sentence because no one could deal with this by themselves.