A/N: Keep reviewing! I love hearing your thoughts and as I said, it motivates me to write even when my life is hectic!

The note did not dramatically fall out of her hands, as though she was in some sad movie about her life. Her hands did tremble, though. They shook so hard that Tony thought she might have actually been concentrating solely on shaking her hands, even if subconsciously. As slowly as they began, the trembles subsided and she took a shaky breath to steady herself. The smaller envelope was in Tony's outstretched hand in front of her.

"I need to find her," she says softly, not moving her eyes from the letter in front of her after taking the smaller paper from him. "Where is Steve?"

"Why do you need Steve?" He asks, clearly confused by her sudden interest in his whereabouts.

"I need to talk to him about Bucky. She said some things... We need to save him. He's good." Her words felt heavy and strange as flashes of his actions still danced across her vision when mentioning his name. She was surprised at how easily she had come to trust the brunette, but it made sense as he had been on her side and nothing but helpful since he learned.

"He's with him, they had made some kind of discovery earlier."

"Will you take me there?"

"Of course," his heart surged a bit at her request. He had never known Natasha to ask for help willingly, so maybe they were making an impact on her. On the other hand, though, maybe she was just reeling from whatever the contents of the paper had told her. They walked slowly and he had to steady her every few steps, as even simple walking appeared to be exhausting to the point of dizziness.

"Can I get you something from the cafeteria?"

"Tony Stark? Offering to get something for someone else?"

"Fine, can I send one of these little agents to get you something from the cafeteria?"

"I'm fine," she sighed as she paused again to catch her breath. The exertion of the walk across the compound was taking a toll and she could feel it in her joints.

"Red, you need to eat something."

"No," she breaths heavily, beginning to walk again. "Actually, I don't."

"Come on," he pleads. "You were making such great progress, don't slow down now."

She almost tells him that no, actually, she wasn't making good progress. At least, not according to Clint; and if she wasn't getting better for him, what was the point anyway? But she wasn't ready to give up her slow, less noticeable attempt on her life just yet. Her body would not last more than three days without water, given her malnourished state, level of activity, and increased metabolism. Plus, if she couldn't hurt herself without permission, maybe this could serve the same punishment instead.

"Maybe later," she responds simply, picking up their pace. "I need to focus on this."

When they finally arrived in the holding area of SHIELD's facility, the place was a flurry of chaos all around. Several SHIELD agents were huddled around what she assumed to be Bucky's bed, Steve was in the corner not speaking or doing anything, and Bruce was flying around the room, taking notes and adjusting levels of some chemicals in a hypothetical 3D projection. Upon closer inspection, Bucky was lying motionless on the table.

"What happened?" She asked loudly, moving toward Steve, who held his knees in his arms similar to how she held herself during a panic attack.

"We were trying to detox him."

"Detox?" Stark asked from behind her. "He was on drugs? Oh. OH. Is that how they were-?"

"They were controlling him with some kind of drug. Botched Super Soldier serum mixed with a drug that makes the user more susceptible to suggestion," Bruce says from across the room. "We tried to detox him, but then he crashed. We stabilized him, but Steve watched it happen and we thought we lost him."

"We almost lost him, again," he rasps through a small, tearful cry.

"I understand how you feel."

"Nat, I know you're going through a lot right now, but I don't think you understand this."

"I just lost my best friend all over again," she sits across from him on the floor. "Her name was Sasha if you didn't hear Fury when he apparently told you all first. She was saved from the Red Room, but she killed herself when she got to SHIELD. They told me… They told me she was saved. And then she died. Again." The trembling returned to her hands once more as Steve looked at her through blurry eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Nat," he says, holding both of her hands in his. She flinches backward instinctively, but eventually lets him pull her into a small hug on his chest.

"It was him," she said quietly. "Your friend saved mine."

"What? But he…" He holds her head up slightly to meet her eyes, searching them for an explanation she has not provided.

"I guess it was before… Before they really had him under control. He would come in and out of the drug's effects and he helped her to escape. And she got me out with SHIELD. He's the reason I made it out. The reason that she had a chance at life. I'm not a scientist and I can't do much to help, but I want him to make it through this and get back to who he was, even if it will take a while for me to look at him."

"Thank you," he replies breathlessly after several minutes. "I think… I think I'm gonna need you to lean on as much as you need the rest of us, Nat."