Summary: What if the Akatsuki had lived \past Itachi's fight with Sasuke? What if there was more to Kisame and Itachi's relationship than they'd ever known, including a child? How will things change?
Tags: Canon Typical Violence; Accidental Baby Acquisition; Canonical Character Death; Age Difference; Alternate Universe; Child Neglect; Akatsuki as Family; Good but Bad! Akatsuki; The Akatsuki don't like Sasuke; Neither does the author; More to be added as the Story continues
Pairings: Hoshigaki Kisame/ Uchiha Itachi; SasoDei; PeiKon; ToZet; KazuHida
Chapter One
He was thirteen when he found her.
It had been a week since Juzo had been killed by the Sanbi jinchuuriki, and his first solo mission for the Akatsuki, his first assassination since that night and it had been a fight to keep himself present.
To keep his hands from shaking as they had when he-
No.
He'd forced the thoughts away, carrying out his mission with a steady hand and a blank expression, reminding himself that it was for Sasuke. It was all for Sasuke.
His target, a corrupt brothel owner kidnapping prostitutes and handing them over to slavers, as well as the man's wife, who was complacent in her husband's dealings, watching it all with cold eyes and a false smile.
He'd watched them, studied them intently and yet…
His "all seeing" eyes had missed her until shortly after he'd murdered her parents. Until she had began to cry in hunger as he was readying to flee the scene.
He found her shoved in a barren room a few doors down from his targets' bedroom, her tiny face red in exertion as she screamed her little lungs out. She was only a month old, though small from obvious neglect and a sudden surge of vindictive anger hit him.
He no longer felt bad for killing her parents.
Not when she was lying in that little crib with nothing but a tattered blanket and dirty nappy while her parents lived in luxury just a few doors down. Not when she looked up at him, almost as if she were surprised that someone had appeared as she cried, her tiny frame malnourished and she reached so freely for him, of all beings.
Gently lifting the babe into his arms, he rocked her soothingly, lips pursing as he took in the old bottle at her bedside. Rifling through her meagre belongings, he found a clean bottle and filled it with water from his canteen before making her a fresh bottle.
Knowing that he still had nearly an hour before the sun rose and even longer until anyone noticed his targets' absence, he fed the hungry child, his cold broken heart warm for the first time since he'd been forced to raise his blade against his kin.
Amber eyes stared up at him curiously, hand curled tight around one of his fingers as if he would vanish should she let go.
Allowing a tiny smile to curl across his lips, he told himself that he would take her to a good family when he left. One that would love her as she deserved. One that didn't consist of having a clan killer as kin.
The thought should've been painless and yet-
As that trusting topaz gaze slid closed, little body curling closer...he couldn't bring himself to let her go.
Something strong and binding wound its way around his heart, linking them and though young, he knew what it was.
He'd felt it since he was six years old. Since the very first night he'd held Sasuke in his arms.
Love.
He loved this little creature, as he had loved Sasuke. She was his. Tucking her bottle into his kunai pouch, he cradled her protectively and made his way back into her parents' bedroom. Taking one of the smaller blankets from their closet, her created a makeshift baby sling and placed the sleeping child into it, then placed his cloak over it. Making sure she was warm and secure, he slipped from the room into the crisp night air, a warm smile on his lips.
"Sleep well, Amara." He whispered softly.
*/*
Hiding her from the rest of the Akatsuki is surprisingly easy.
Being the only other person without a teammate, he has an entire room to himself and he is grateful for it. No one bothers him, too busy with their own problems or too afraid of his apparent "berserker" tendencies.
Amara is quiet and watchful, eyes like liquid gold and hair the same ash color of his own. Her cries were easily hidden by the privacy seals Pein had placed on every bedroom and he'd used a subtle seal to hide her chakra.
Falling into routine is almost too easy.
He wakes to feed her every three hours at night, power napping between feedings. During the day, barring there were no missions, he kept her tucked under his cloak or he remained in his room and read to her, singing the songs of his ancestors even as they tasted like ash in his mouth.
He was an Uchiha and proud of it...but he didn't deserve to call himself one.
Not after the sin he'd committed.
So he doesn't.
He is just Itachi and she is just Amara. He wants to give her a last name to be proud of.
He doesn't.
She coos at him and bats playfully at his cheeks when he tells her they are clanless.
The days passed quickly.
One week turned to two, then three until two months had passed.
Then the routine changes and Kisame is assigned as his partner
*/*
His secret is discovered on their second night as partners.
The shark had moved into his room earlier that day, his large frame imposing. His eyes, nearly the same shade as Amara's glinted with the kind of criminal mischief he hadn't seen since Shisui had been alive and the man's statement to him had made him curious.
Still, he'd waited until the shark was well into REM sleep to remove his cloak and bear Amara's existence to the world.
The infant stared up him with a disgruntled pout, whimpering as her stomach announced its demand for food.
He'd made a quick bottle and began to feed her, Kisame's presence fading to the background as his entire existence focused on the babe in his arms. She suckled ferociously, choked coos leaving her little body and he chuckled softly.
"Sh, hime. Slow down." He whispered, pulling the bottle away slightly. She whined and handed it back, watching as she slowly fell asleep. Once she finished he pat her back and burped her before giving her cleaning and lying down curled protectively around her fragile form.
A few hours later she awoke with a wailing screech, and he'd jumped up, weapon in hand. Finding that the culprit was a soiled nappy and hunger rather than an enemy shinobi he'd sighed and set about soothing her, unaware of the curious gaze following his every move.
After he'd fed and changed her, he rocked her back to sleep before collapsing beside her, hands trembling from lack of rest.
"How old is she?"
He tensed, curling tighter around his child's tiny form. Mentally, he wondered how he'd managed to forget his new partner's presence.
"Three months, give or take."
The shark's eyes widened. "And no one knows?"
"No, and they won't." He replied, threat clear in his voice. Kisame stared at him then shook his head.
"You're playing a dangerous game, Itachi-san."
He glared at him.
"I refuse to allow Amara to grow up to become a weapon for 'Tobi' to exploit. I refuse to put her in that position."
"She's growing. Surely you don't expect to hide her forever. She's a human."
The Uchiha pulled his daughter closer. "I know." He whispered. "But I couldn't leave her there."
"There?"
"I killed her parents on a mission and found her neglected only a few doors down. I couldn't leave her." He looked down at her, a tiny smile curling across his lips. "I don't plan to hide her here her entire life. I have a seperate apartment outside of the base setup for when she turns two."
Kisame nodded, glancing down at the baby lying next to his partner, then at the beautiful teen curled protectively around her.
They didn't speak about it again, but somehow or another he ended up roped into helping care for her.
He'd become her parent just as much as Itachi, himself, which had somehow translated to him becoming very overprotective of Itachi as well.
The former Uchiha had even found himself referring to Amara as their daughter, more often than not, and the babe didn't seem to mind. She seemed just as enamoured with Kisame as she was with him, and it was surprisingly easy keeping her hidden.
Most of their missions were long, taking weeks or months at a time, so it was normally just the three of them.
This said he really shouldn't have been surprised when, shortly after the one year anniversary of finding Amara, he discovered that he'd fallen in love with the blue-skinned man. The realization had hit him as he watched the man play with the baby, watching him chuckle every time she giggled.
He'd fallen in love with the way the cold, rogish kiri-nin would soften around their daughter when they were alone. The way he circle Itachi in battle when they were fighting as if Amara were tucked under his cloak, even knowing he always entrusted her to his crows and a bunshin to keep her out of harm's way. It always left his heart feeling warm and his cheeks feeling as if they were burning though his cloak hid it well.
He'd fallen in love with Kisame and he absolutely hated it, because he knew that nothing would come of it. The man was ten years his senior and outside of caring for Amara, he seemed to view him as a child. There was no way he'd return the feelings lurking in Itachi's heart so, the Uchiha locked them away as he did everything else, and tried to pretend that he didn't hurt a little when the shark whistled appreciatively at women they passed or told him tales of life in the mist.
He'd been prepared to hide it forever...Kisame had turned that plan on it's head.
Just a few days after he'd discovered (and consequentially hidden) his feelings for the man, they'd gone on an undercover mission in Iwa to observe the Yonbi jinchuuriki. They had decided to pose as a married couple seeking to renew their vows, seeing as how Amara was travelling with them. During the faux ceremony, he'd found himself surprised when the man slid an actual ring on his finger, topaz eyes gleaming mischievously.
The mission went off flawlessly and he was stunned when they returned to their room the inn, only to be shoved against the wall and kissed soundly.
His partner's strong body pinned him there and he moaned softly, allowing the kiri-nin's tongue to slip past his lips when it sought entrance. After a moment, he pulled away to breathe, his cheeks burning from the flush there.
"I-I don't-"
Kisame smiled, kissing him chastely, before producing the certificate they'd signed during the ceremony. "We've been together since we started raising Mara-hime. Might as well make it official."
It was such a thing for the man to do that he couldn't do anything but chuckle.
"I think this means Amara is now Hoshigaki Amara, no?"
His husband frowned. "Not Uchiha-Hoshigaki?"
Itachi shook his head. "We aren't Uchiha. Not anymore."
Giving him an assessing look, his husband finally smirked. "Hoshigaki Itachi. I like."
He leaned into the man's warmth, hiding the tiny smile that curled his lips there.
He liked it too.
*/*
The next few years passed in a haze of warmth and violence.
They continued their missions for the Akatsuki, keeping Amara hidden in a secret apartment away from the base with bunshins to care for her until they were sent out once more. They managed to keep their marriage hidden from their comrades, barring Konan who had pulled him off to the side and congratulated him.
Still they grew closer to the rest of the Akatsuki, never close enough to tell them about the beautiful child that held their hearts, but close enough that their deaths would hurt. That they couldn't imagine not being able to return.
They were content.
So of course the other shoe had to fall.
And it did.
*/*
He collapsed after a mission just after Amara's third birthday.
The toddler had been walking between them listening as Kisame indulged her with tales of Kiri and his fellow swordsmen. He'd listened with a small smile,trying to ignore the ache in his chest that had been building over the past few days, only for his chest to clench unexpectedly. He'd slipped into a coughing fit, that had escalated to him coughing up blood.
Kisame was at his side immediately, their daughter crying in panic in the background and he barely managed to summon his Bunshin no Karasu to take her away. Once she was gone, he slipped into unconsciousness, his lovers cry of his name ringing in his ears.
When he awoke, the man was staring down at him with a broken gleam in his eyes.
"K-Kisa?" He rasped, and his husband shook his head.
"You're dying, 'tachi." He murmured and Itachi sighed, looking away as memories flooded back to him.
"I thought this had gone away. When I was a child, the healers had assured my parents that my illness had gone into remission. When it didn't reappear, chichue believed I was healed."
"Its incurable." The man guessed correctly and Itachi nodded. "Use of my Mangekyou only exacerbates it. Its why I never-" He cut himself off, stiffening as Kisame pulled him into his arms.
"How long?"
"Optimistically, four years. I need to live for at least five."
Kisame looked up at him. "Need to?"
He pursed his lips, looking up at the man that loved him, that had showed him he was capable of falling in love, and wanted, for the first time in years, to cry. He wanted to be anyone but who he was, yet he wouldn't want to be anywhere else.
"I've known since I killed my clan that I wouldn't live past twenty, maybe twenty-two. I've accepted it."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
He met his husband's scowl head on. "When the time comes that Sasuke has finally attained his Mangekyou...we will fight. He will kill me."
The man's glare darkened. "And you'll let him?"
He nodded.
"Why?! Why would you do that?"
It was the raw pain in the man's voice that made his decision for him. The raw despair at the thought of his death that made him grab the man's hand and tug him onto his hospital bed.
Slowly, the truth of the massacre left his lips, the story a whispered breath on the wind. His lover listened, wide-eyed and finally when he'd concluded it, pulled him into a strong embrace, large shoulders trembling slightly. Instead of lavishing him in false platitudes, he kissed him as soundly as he dared, and held him close.
They didn't move the rest of the day, not even when his bunshin brought Amara to join them.
*/*
They're sent after the Kyuubi Jinchuuriki a year later.
It takes everything in Kisame not to kill Sasuke when he shows up, sharingan blazing. When Itachi fights back, and knocks the boy unconscious with Tsukuyomi, he's relieved.
They escape once Jiraiya arrives.
Itachi has a fit shortly after, his sickness rearing its ugly head.
They don't talk about it.
*/*
They enroll Amara in the Amegakure the next year.
They lie to the academy teacher and tell her that the child is in witness protection with their organization and that for her own protection, they cannot put her last name down.
The instructor, well acquainted with their red clouded cloaks, nods in acquiescence, and allows her to be registered with no further questions.
Amara had stared at them wide-eyed when they told her that she would be staying there for the day, nerves visible in her gold eyes and he'd kissed her forehead with a smile.
"You'll be fine, little one." He soothed. "Tou-san and I will be here as soon as your classes let out."
She stared up at him, biting her lip and he was suddenly struck by the thought that she was growing up. This child that he had raised, that he'd trained, was growing so fast...and he wouldn't live to see the outcome of it all.
He wouldn't live to see their baby girl soar through the ranks. To threaten her lovers should they hurt her, to see her married.
It hurt.
It hurt so much more than anything he'd ever felt.
Forcing back the tears that wanted to fall, he continued to smile as she finally nodded.
"Promise?"
"Promise."
Stiffening her spine, she kissed him on the cheek then ran to join her class.
He dispersed into a murder of crows before she could see the tear that left his eyes.
*/*
"No."
Kisame sighed as he took in the stubborn set of his husband's jaw, the younger man's sharingan glaring death at the chunin in front of them.
The woman shuddered at his stare but powered on.
"Itachi-sama, Amara-chan is years ahead of her classmates. Keeping her in my class would be an injustice to not only the other students but her, as well. We have already moved her up as far as she can go, the only thing we can do is have her take the genin exam."
Itachi's glare deepened, his voice like silk covered steel when he spoke. "She is a six year old child. I refuse to allow you to send her off to the battlefields at such an age. She may be a genius but she is still a child and she will remain one for as long as she is able."
The chunin shook her head. "Itachi-sama, we will only be promoting her to genin. Pein-sama has outlawed the practice of promoting anyone under fifteen to chunin due to the high casualty rate amongst them. The worse she will face is bandits, and even then, she will not be able to take on a C-rank mission until her jounin sensei is sure her team is ready."
He stared at her, then glanced at Kisame, who nodded.
His heart clenched and he looked away from them both to the little girl sitting in his lap.
"Amara," She glanced up at him. "What would you like to do?"
For a moment she was silent. Then a grin, not unlike her father's crossed her lips.
"I can do this." She assured him. "Please, Kaa-sama. Believe in me and the training you and tou-san have given me if you believe in nothing else."
A tiny smirk crossed his lips and he nodded at her decision, trying not to feel as if he had just signed her life away.
"Okay," He agreed and she beamed at him. "Okay."
To no one's surprise, she passes her genin exam with flying colors and graduates with a class all five or six years her senior.
When she is assigned a team, he secretly threatens her sensei into submission.
The woman, Leiko Ayame, takes his threat to heart, her blue eyes wide inside his tsukuyomi. She didn't meet his gaze for weeks.
He told Pein it was because of a misunderstanding.
Kisame laughed.
*/*
He isn't surprised when Amara takes to shinobi life like a fish to water.
Despite not being theirs biologically, she is a perfect mix of their personalities. She carried the burden of his genius and his affinity for fire (and water) while also carrying Kisame's battle lust, quick temper, and kenjutsu proficiency. Her chakra reserves, much like his husband's, were abnormally large, but he'd managed to impress upon her the importance of chakra control.
She loved it.
Ayame, once she got over her fear of him, told him that she was often the most vicious in their team's spars, and the strongest.
He was proud, even if it left his heart feeling heavy.
At seven, she was one of their villages most feared genin, known for her quick temper and the twin sai he'd gifted her for birthday. She'd named them Katon and Hyōton, after he and Kisame, citing that they were like fire and ice for all that their temperaments were so different.
He'd chuckled but agreed.
Kisame had held him that night as they watched her train.
"Seven years, and the others still know nothing about her."
Itachi turned to him. "Do you want them to?"
"I don't know. I just- I know that we're trying to keep her out of Tobi's hands, but I feel like they're going to find out eventually whether we want them to or not."
He nodded.
"With the way things are going, war is just on the horizon, especially if Tobi's plans pan out. Sasuke has defected and I have no doubt that soon we will clash." He forced his husband to meet his gaze. "Promise me that no matter what happens, you'll protect her. Tobi will try to use her and I can't-"
Kisame cut him off with a chaste kiss.
"He won't touch her. I promise."
He believes him.
*/*
He dies just days after Amara leaves for her first C-rank mission.
Throughout his fight with Sasuke, she is in his thoughts, her entire life flashing before his eyes.
Finding her that night eight years ago.
Her first smile.
Her first word. (Ara, Amara.)
Her first steps.
Her first birthday. (They'd made it the day he found her.)
Her first time holding a kunai.
Teaching her shurikenjutsu.
Helping Kisame teach her kenjutsu.
Her first day at the academy.
Her genin exams.
Her first D-rank.
Even watching her leave for her first C-rank only days previous.
In nearly every memory, Kisame is beside him, beaming proudly and it hurts more than he'd like to admit that he is leaving them behind. Still he can't bring himself to regret it, not knowing that the only other option was for them to watch him wither away as his illness took him.
No.
It was better this way.
Sealing away the remnant of Orochimaru that had attached itself to his brother, he stumbled forward, feeling his organs begin to fail him. Keeping the mask he'd worked so hard to develop since the night of Shisui's death, he spouted out some power-hungry nonsense about taking Sasuke's eyes, heart heavy as the teen staggered back in fear.
Darkness encroaching in on him, he reached forward and finally let the mask fall, his fingertips tapping his otouto's forehead.
"Sorry, Sasuke. There won't be a next time."
'I'm so sorry, Amara. I love you.'
Allowing oblivion to finally take him, he could only hope his three most precious people would forgive him.
TBC...