The Magicians' Realm Chapter 110: Rank and File Trouble, a yu-gi-oh fanfic

Chapter 110, everybody! Yes, it lives! I mean it hasn't been that long since I updated last, right—

Last updated December 28, 2020

…please never let me go this long again TWO YEARS oh gosh that's terrible. OTL

Okay to be fair this did give me the opportunity to do some severe editing because in the case of the alternate town we're into sections I wrote all the way back in 2008, so a lot of that needed to be edited anyway, and then the need to write BH6 fanfiction hit me hard over the head. Good news though, we're set for at least a month, happy summer. :)

Onto the topic of editing, at some point the kids would have been treated to a really butchered play and other assorted nonsense, so in some sense they lucked out. On the flip side, Skulduggery is fun to write for in a section that was written years after the bare-bones of the current timeline. And look! It's someone important! And discussing politics which reminds me why I didn't touch this fic for a couple of years. OTL

Movie this week is technically a combo of Shrek and Die Hard—we were watching the movies on the TV so every commercial we'd flick to the other one. In other news, I've been working on this fic for so long that Microsoft is starting to try to phase out DVD-playing apps. Microsoft and I are destined to have words.

Angiembabe, thanks for the review! Ooh that sounds good, that would definitely be a trigger for Yami….

FluffyIdiotIsI, thanks for the review! Yes it is! *has been gone from this fic for two years* Oh same—every time I've ever been told to scale back my writing, either for school or work, I think of the massive fanfics I've read/written and just laugh. Yes yes oh yes so long as chaos doesn't turn into Chaos they'll do well. Me too! Hopefully I don't have another big gap like I did. ^^;

References:

Original characters, + setting © Kineil D. Wicks (myself, not the girl in the story)

Yami was jolted awake by a loud banging.

He sat bolt upright, glanced around in disorientation, then sagged as he realized where he was.

No, it was not all a dream: he—and his friends—were still stuck in the limbo dimension with—

The door swung open and Kineil Wicks stuck her head in.

"Good morning!" she chimed, grinning broadly; it looked like a predatory snarl. "We've got a big day planned, so up and at-em!"

Yami glowered as she ducked back out. Big day planned? He didn't like the sound of that.

This was confirmed in short order when they were all sat at a breakfast no one bothered to eat.

"You see," Bakura Necromancer said. "It's been so long since we've had guests, that we're all dying to entertain you!"

Kineil slamming a bowlful of porridge into his face wasn't exactly a surprise, considering the groans coming from the other dead denizens present.

"It's bad enough I have to hear skeleton puns from Skul," she said. "Don't you start."

"Fine, be that way," Bakura Necromancer groused.

"What kind of entertainment?" Anzu asked warily.

"The kind that will only end in tears," Honda said.

"So we're all going to die," Bakura (their Bakura) observed drily—

Startled along with the rest of them when Rocky loudly declared "OF FUN!"

*\*/*

The trip to the Capitol was uneventful, all things considered. Really gave a man time to think.

For someone like Skulduggery Pleasant, ace Magician and crackerjack detective, it gave him too much time to think.

Mostly he was thinking of the frustrations involved with this investigation, which wasn't going as smoothly as he'd hoped. Yes, they had figured out how to prevent Kineil's untimely death, but his acute sense of the feminine mind told him that Teana had seen more than just that—and that she hadn't even intended to share that part.

Which was why he had bothered to come up to the Capitol in the first place, a nice sturdy clean-looking town that suffered from an egress of politicians, same as Delvaire. In this case, it was the politicians relating to the Civil Branch, who mostly preferred to operate separate from the Magicians. Not that there weren't Magicians here—those fell under the unfortunate blanket of sensible. Darn them. They probably used doors too.

At the moment, however, everyone he interacted with seemed simply baffled—mostly because he'd go up to every man he saw, check to see if they were about his height and wearing a badge, and then quiz them, mostly for identifiers. Didn't want to bring up Kineil and inadvertently plant the idea in their heads, although he did bother to ask any murdering impulses lately?

He got a few smart remarks in response to that one.

But after most of a day, he was going to have to admit that he needed more to go on than just this. Hence his call.

The phone picked up on the second ring. "Hello?"

"Oh hello!" Skulduggery greeted. "Is this Teana's answering service? Can I speak to Miss Teana, please?"

"Ah…Miss Teana I have good news," Yami said, sounding like he was holding the phone away slightly. "You've officially moved in."

"And today is different from the past month or so because?" Teana asked, faintly picked up by the phone.

"You're getting social calls."

"Oi vey…give me that." Wait patiently. "Hello?"

"Hello Miss Teana, it's Detective Pleasant, remember me?"

"You're really going to ask that question."

"It seems like a good icebreaker. I was wondering if you had anything else you could tell me about Miss Kineil's future killer."

"And now you're going to ask me that."

"I am! Very good deductive reasoning, we ought to look into making you a detective. But moving on—I need details. Eye color, hair color, skin color…a name…actually a name would be excellent right about now."

"And what would you do if you had those details? Wait, what are you doing now?"

"Identifying potential suspects. Unfortunately, what I have doesn't narrow things down much. I am assured the perpetrator is not female and not a civilian, but that leaves a lot to be desired."

"I can't believe you're still on about this."

"Skulduggery has this habit of not letting things go," Yami volunteered.

"You beat it this is a private conversation."

"Yes, let him know I second that feeling," Skulduggery said.

"Skulduggery says to buzz off."

"Close enough. Any more details to share, Miss Teana?"

Long silence.

"Dark hair, dark eyes," she told him. "Dresses like he's off to hunt John Dillinger."

"Well that eliminates less than half of my suspect list," Skulduggery sighed. "A name would have been better."

"You know what, I'm kind of curious—what, exactly, would you do if you caught the guy? It's not like you could arrest him."

"No, that's true, but I could dissuade him."

"You're making too much out of this."

"Am I? Perhaps you're making too little of it."

Beat. "Goodbye, Skul."

And she hung up.

"Well that was rude," he muttered, hanging up. And very telling. She wasn't making too little of it—she was just terrified of what was to come.

What on earth had she seen in that dream of hers?

Later—moving on: going through his list and crossing out everyone who didn't match the amended description. Glance up routinely to watch the crowd—

Blink when he spotted someone walking by who matched the description—someone he hadn't grilled yet. "Ah, excellent," he muttered, slipping out of the phone booth to follow him. Trail until he reached an open-air barista, wait until he was distracted with his order, sidle up to lean on the glass displays.

"I'll have what he's having," Skulduggery told the lady behind the counter—looked at the stranger. "At least I say I will—what kind of taste do you have?"

The guy considered him for a long moment. "Coffee, black, no cream."

"Hmm, serviceable, but needs something to wash it down with. Add one of those croissants, I'm feeling in a Francois mood."

"Sure you are," the man said, eyeing him. "Mind sharing why you've been following me?"

Oh wow this guy was good—most people didn't notice a tail, and most of those people didn't notice him tailing them. "Mind sharing how you're certain I've been following you?"

"Magicians put out a sort of obvious air."

"Excuse you I showered."

"I was talking more the suit color."

"It's mauve."

"It's ghastly."

"It is, actually—best tailor in Ameris, let's be honest."

"And who's that?"

"Ah, terribly sorry, but you still haven't told me who you are."

"And one of you needs to tell me who's paying," the lady behind the counter said.

"Put it on my new friend's tab, thank you."

The guy looked like he was debating on stewing as Skulduggery plucked up his coffee and croissant, keeping one eye slitted open during his moment of silence and adding an apology for that.

"Thomas Montgau," he said finally, pulling out a few bills and putting them on the counter. "Keep the change. And you," he said, redirecting his attention to Skulduggery. "I think I've heard of you—that annoying detective from Delvaire?"

"Yes to the second and yes to the third, but annoying is a failure of a description and I'll thank you to rescind it." Shuffle his food about a bit, dust his fingers before tipping his hat. "Head Detective Skulduggery Pleasant, at your service."

"Head of the Civil Branch."

"Holding up the line," the lady behind the counter said, shooing them both away. "Go one-up each other somewhere else."

They sidled away, still eyeing each other, Skulduggery evaluating, Montgau apparently trying to figure out just why he was here, eyeing him like he was suspected of murder.

Which he was—about Skulduggery's height, nice hat, dark hair dark eyes, and a badge on his chest. Fit quite nicely with the description.

Now how to figure out if he was right?

"So what brings you up here to shadow me?" Montgau asked.

"Whims, contrails, question marks," Skulduggery said. "Reaches of the cosmos were beckoning, although I'm still waiting on them to be enlightening."

Good news, he had succeeded in baffling Montgau. "So you're as batty as I've heard."

"'Batty' is such a strong word."

"No, insane is a strong word. You…I've heard a lot of good things about you, but they're always preceded with comments on your sanity. I think I might see why."

"Ah, very cold. Probably on point, but very cold." Finish his croissant. "I've always found that conventional needs rarely get me what I need. People learn the conventional, plan for it—my tactics catch them off-guard."

"And your reason for wanting me off-guard?"

"Telling would be cheating. Although you're telling me quite a bit—guilty conscience?"

"You did follow me," Montgau pointed out. "And now you're interrogating me, unless I miss my guess."

"You might—it can be difficult to be sure, sometimes. What purpose do I have in interrogating you, after all? Perhaps I'm just up here looking for conversation and you seemed suitably interesting."

Montgau sighed. "Fine, I'll ask the stupid question: there was no one in Delvaire?"

"I like to shake things up. After all, there's only so many people. Ever been?"

"No."

"Ever plan on it?"

"Not really. Oh don't tell me, let me guess, you've switched from Head Detective to lead of the Tourist Bureau."

"And I'm up here hunting for my replacement—congratulations."

Montgau took a long drink of his coffee at that, looking aggrieved. Skulduggery took the opportunity to appraise him, debating…killed in the line of duty, yes, but not a killer. Irritated at the circumnavigate conversation, but not driven to violence and probably wouldn't be unless given a concrete reason. Not someone he could picture shooting Kineil in the back, for any reason.

And yet….

Glanced at his badge again, examining it in more detail….

"You're a G-Man," he said.

Montgau looked down at his badge, like he had to be reminded of it now that Skulduggery had called attention to it. "Yes?" Consider him. "You don't seem like you're in need of someone going cross-country with you. Oh wait let me guess, your wife insisted."

Observant too, he thought, rubbing his wedding ring with his thumb. "It just struck me as interesting—there's not much call for you lot in Delvaire. Matter of fact, don't think there's much call for you at all anymore, is there?"

Montgau sighed, finally sat down in an empty chair. "No," he said, indicating Skulduggery do the same. "Or at least, not exactly—there's unrest, but there always is. It's just nothing any of us can act on."

Now this was intriguing. "What kind of unrest?"

Montgau gave him an appraising look. "You're aware of our eminent Head Mage, I'm sure."

"Of course."

"Well, his laissez faire approach doesn't jive well with politicians, you know that. But there's no getting rid of him once he's in power, so the politicians have been spending their energies aggravating their local constituents and then trying to pass the blame to the Head Mage."

"Ah bless, I thought I got away from all that when I hopped the pond."

"That's right, you're from Eire originally."

"You had to recall that? Oh dear, me accent's slipping."

"Cute." Sit back, consider him. "Whatever happened with that business in Roarhaven?"

"Fights happened, people died, unpleasant business all around," Skulduggery said, matching his even look. "Why would these office heads want to stir up trouble, anyway? Wishing to wage war against some nebulous threat?"

"Nebulous threat is the word for it," Montgau said. "A treatise came through here recently—written by a couple of doctors—"

"Grouse and Finklestein?" Skulduggery guessed, sighing. "I had the pleasure of hearing it as they were puzzling it out. Do believe I also had the pleasure of delivering the final product too." Consider him. "You don't actually believe that hogwash, do you?"

"It doesn't matter what I believe—I'm not the one making the executive decisions," Montgau pointed out. "But from what I've heard, the Administration has always been terrified of the lingering effects of the Age of Chaos—someone found the remains of an old town, archaeologists wanted to investigate it, they shot it down."

"Intriguing…why?"

"Control. No accounts of the history beyond what they say, no chances of losing their power if the Chaos come back. Everything's built on order with this system, no one wants to risk the Chaos coming back and ripping through it all."

Skulduggery couldn't help but scoff at that. "The Chaos aren't coming back. We might say Chaos Weather in regards to warm days, but whatever it was that brought them here isn't just going to—" Pause. "Except—what the good doctors say." Consider the man across from him. "You don't mean to tell me those idiot politicians actually believe that our magic comes from Chaos."

"And that's the problem with Skellington," Montgau told him. "I, personally, don't mind the man—but everything I've heard says he's ridiculously powerful for a Magician. And then his insistence that anyone can learn magic—what if that's the trigger? Unenlightened masses can't fight back—but they also can't run the risk of actually becoming something else."

Skulduggery nodded, drained his coffee. "Very nice. And if you believe that, I've got some lunar green cheese to sell you."

"You and I don't have to believe it," Montgau pointed out, getting up with him and following him out. "And you didn't come here to discuss superstitious politicians."

Skulduggery paused. "No, I didn't." Consider the blinding blue sky, so blue it almost hurt the eye to take it in. Should he share what brought him here? Everything he had seen thus far told him this was a good man, someone he could trust.

But then why would he match the description perfectly?

"Say…someone you knew had a feeling—like a gut feeling," he said, looking at Montgau. "Say you feel the need to investigate, to assure your friends what they dreamed of wouldn't be the case. Would that drive you to go on a trip to chat up random strangers?"

"Let me preface by saying my mind doesn't work like yours and I'm glad."

"Ah," Skulduggery noised, nodding before heading off.

Montgau kept up. "Am I to take it you're going back to Delvaire?"

"Yes—my trail has gone cold up here."

Montgau stopped him. "I can also take it you have the Head Mage's ear."

"Not on me, that would be gross. But I could get it if I needed it."

A muscle twitch was the only hint at the aborted eye roll. "Spend another couple of hours in the Capitol—there's some issues here that need to be brought to his attention."

"Such as?"

"Follow me."

"Ah," Skulduggery noised, doing so. Walk in silence for a bit. "You do know that letters exist."

"I do, and I've tried sending them before—either he doesn't care or he hasn't been receiving them."

Interesting. "And that getting me involved means owing me a favor."

"You won't do it just because it's the right thing to do?"

"You and I both know it's never just that."

Sigh, nod. Glance at him. "If I were to hand you a letter, would you take it to the Head Mage?"

"I would. Are we off to get said letter?"

"No, this is the letter," he said, pulling one out of his pocket and handing it over. "I was on my way to mail it when you started tailing me."

"Ah," Skulduggery said, pocketing it. "So where are we going?"

"I have a lot more than just that letter."

"Most intriguing," he noised, following Montgau into a low sturdy building billing itself as the G-Men headquarters. Route taken through the building suggested he was trying to avoid detection.

"My what a lovely broom closet," Skulduggery observed when they finally reached their destination.

"Funny," Montgau said, pulling a box out and then filling it with files. "Let's just say the Administration finds other things to spend its money on."

"Doesn't it always," Skulduggery said, watching the files being put in. "What is all this?"

"Stuff that should be on your desk—I keep trying to send it, but it keeps getting kicked back. Any ideas?"

"Roughly thirteen of them," Skulduggery said, taking one of the files and flipping through it. From what he could glean, a Magician had been found guilty of something minor and—and stripped of his magic, he realized with a lurch.

"I'm curious," he said, looking at Montgau. "How many of these folders involve a guilty verdict with a sentence of magic removal?"

Montgau looked grim. "More than there should be."

Oh dear.

Also worth concern: the fact that Montgau easily filled the box.

"All of that was magic-related?" he asked, startled.

"All of it," Montgau confirmed. "I've been trying to kick it down to Delvaire for ages and keep getting told the Head Mage kicks it back."

"If Skellington has even heard of it, I'll eat my hat. And this is a good hat I like this hat it's a Bespoke hat and I don't happily risk those." Take the box. "But that can be remedied."

"Now you're sure you'll be able to get this to him."

"Oh trust me," Skulduggery said, turning around and heading out. "When he gets this, you'll know. You'll be able to hear it from here. You'll be able to hear it in Eire." Because this—

This was truly a mystery worth investigating.