Chapter 19:
Isabel always hated falling asleep.
Not for the reasons most three-year-olds do. She didn't mind going to bed. It was the nightmares that haunted her that kept her from getting a good night's sleep. She didn't want to see those terrifying faces. Even a goodnight hug or a lullaby couldn't keep the monsters away. They would come back eventually, preying on her innocent mind. She could never escape what was in her head.
Of course, Levi knew this, and he tried his best to console her. However, not even Humanity's Strongest was powerful enough to get rid of nightmares.
As Isabel drifted into sleep once more, she sensed that familiar sense of dread. She felt a slight warmth when Levi kissed her forehead, but the moment he left the room, darkness closed in. She was utterly alone.
Her body betrayed her, forcing her into sleep. Although she tried to fight it, nothing could stop the oncoming wave of exhaustion.
Every dream started out pleasant. Warm sunlight lit up her old home. Her mom and dad were making some yummy lunch on the stove. It smelled like grilled cheese, one of her favorite dishes. On occasion, her mom would even give her some tomato soup to go with it. Her mouth watered at the thought.
Her father hummed as he chopped up an apple. He always loved music. He was the one that would dance with Isabel as her mother laughed. He would pick up a violin and play for her. Sometimes, they would go into town and play music, hoping to scrape up some extra cash from donations.
Her father twirled her mother into his arms, taking the attention off of the sandwich that had just been taken off of the pan. Her mother laughed as he ushered her away from the counter, dancing and singing. Her mother joined in, creating a light harmony that warmed Isabel to the core.
Suddenly, a large crash could be heard from outside. The music immediately stopped, and her parents turned towards the window.
"That didn't sound like cannon fire." Her mother whimpered.
"I'm going to see what happened. Maybe Garrison is drunk out of their minds again." Her father said, grabbing his hat off of the coat rack. He quickly kissed Isabel on the head before leaving the home.
"Here, sweetie." Her mother placed the sandwich in front of Isabel, and she dug in happily.
A few minutes passed, and suddenly, Isabel's father burst through the door.
"TITANS!" He cried.
Her mother's eyes went wide.
"What? How?"
"Wall Rose has fallen. The titans are invading." Her father explained. "We have to go. Now."
Her mother immediately bolted into their bedroom, grabbing a few extra clothes in a worn-out suitcase.
"We don't have time! We need to go!" Her father cried.
"Sina won't be generous to us! I'm trying to give us provisions. Help me!" Her mother replied, stuffing more clothes into the suitcase.
Her father groaned and went to help his wife. Isabel sat silently on her chair, wondering what the problem was. What were titans? Why were mommy and daddy scared?
Fast booms could be heard in the distance, getting closer with rapid speed.
"We need to hide! Maybe if they don't see us, we can escape." Her father said, trying to shut the suitcase.
Her mother shook, her blue eyes filled with fear.
Shouts could be heard from outside. Isabel could hear the whip of cords and saw people fly by. Who were they? Were they here to help?
Screams followed, and Isabel's eyes filled with fear as she saw what was causing the commotion. A giant monster bolted through the streets, munching on something. Red liquid spewed from its mouth as it grinned.
"...ieve, get away from the window!" Her father called her name, but she couldn't decipher the words with her ears ringing.
Isabel felt a chill up her spine as the titan turned to look at her. She tried to run, but her feet wouldn't move. She was stuck.
All of the sudden, her parents were in front of her, shoving her away right as the house collapsed over them. Isabel could feel the sticky blood slide down her face. Pain seared through every part of her body. She cried out for her parents, but they weren't answering. She looked over to see a river of blood pouring out from under the debris. She could see her mother's hand. It was covered with grime, and Isabel felt bile rise in her mouth. She was being crushed. The house was crushing her. She was choking on blood. She couldn't breathe…
Suddenly, her dream shifted. She was safe in the barracks, surrounded by her friends. Petra was cleaning her up, wiping away dirt on her arms. Oluo was braiding her hair. Gunther and Eld chatted with the new members of the squad.
"Okay, little missy, you're all set!" Petra smiled, getting up and tossing the cloth in a bin to get washed.
Isabel beamed at her. Krista came beside Oluo to help with her hair, and Eren came over to talk with her while they were finishing up. Everything was perfect once again. Nothing could harm her with her friends around...her family.
Suddenly, the ceiling caved in, turning the entirety of the barracks into splinters. Isabel felt that crushing pain once again. She thrashed around, but nothing could move the beam holding her down. She heard the screams of those she loved. They echoed over and over again in her head. Her shrieks couldn't be heard by anyone.
She looked over to see her Papa in the clutches of the titan that had demolished her old home. It smiled evilly at him before raising him to its mouth. Isabel called out for him, but her Papa didn't hear her.
Suddenly...she understood what the titan had been munching on earlier.
She heard him scream...hot, scarlet blood spewing from the titan's mouth. He was gone.
Isabel woke up quickly, letting out a scream as she jolted upright. Sweat poured down her face and body. Her hair was soaked.
It had all been a dream. But it felt so real.
With tears and sweat streaming down her face, she climbed out of bed. She had to find Papa. She had to make sure he was alright. He would help her. He would give her a big hug and calm her mind.
She walked into the hallway and towards his room, which was just a few doors down. She felt most comfortable knowing Levi was close by. She opened his door quietly and snuck over to his bed. He, too, was sweating. He tossed and turned in his sleep. He started to hyperventilate.
"Papa?" Isabel whispered.
Levi didn't seem to hear her.
"Papa?"
No response.
Isabel reached out for him, gently touching his shoulder. And that's when everything went wrong.
…
The expedition had gone terribly wrong. Levi cursed Erwin for sending all of his comrades to their deaths. Especially his best friends.
Both his old and new squads were there. So was Hange. So were Isabel and Farlan. They were surrounded by a legion of titans who had already feasted on other members of the Scouting Regiment. Even Erwin, who had seemed nearly untouchable, had been eaten alive, screaming and kicking. Levi hated the sight.
"I will not go down like this!" Isabel cried, shooting out her cables and latching on to the shoulders of the nearest titan. She slashed its nape and it went down. She laughed with delight.
"Woohoo!" Hange cheered, following Isabel's example.
"Wait! You all will get killed!" Levi cried.
"Trust in us, Captain. We can do this." Petra beamed, and the other members of the squad left.
"No! You'll die! Please!" Levi screamed, but his friends refused to stop. Over and over, they sliced the napes of the monsters, but the titans kept coming. They would overpower them, and they would all die.
Levi launched himself into the air, slicing a nape with ease. He would protect his friends to the very end. He refused to let them die.
Sadly, there was not enough he could do. His gas eventually ran out, and one by one, his comrades were eaten. Blood and flesh gushed from the titan's teeth. Limbs littered the blood-soaked ground. The titans smiled greedily at him, and Levi's mind flooded with dread. He felt numb. His friends' deaths had been for nothing, and he would soon join them.
"Papa!" A voice screamed.
Isabel! The monsters had his little girl! They could not take her. He had already lost too much.
He tried to reach her, but he turned to see a titan reaching for him. Its filthy maw was wide open, showing the contents of his last meal. Levi felt sick. It grabbed onto him tightly, and he shook with anger. This thing would not take him easily. He would go down fighting.
He drew his dulled blade, preparing for the kill when…
"Papa?" A whimper escaped his little girl's lips.
He looked around. He was in his room. He was sweaty. He felt like a giant weight was on his chest, ready to crush him, but worst of all…
He held Isabel's wrist in a death grip, poised to punch. His fist almost looked like...it was holding his ODM blades.
He realized what had happened. It had been a bad dream. Isabel had tried to wake him up, and he lashed out. He was too frightened to register that it was safe. He was about to…
His hand trembled as he released her wrist, which was now stark-white from his strength. "I-Isabel. I-I'm so s-sorry. I-I d-didn't mean..."
He looked into her eyes, which were usually so full of joy. But now, they were filled with...fear. Tears streamed down her cheeks. He could see her trembling in the darkness.
In all of his years, even in the Underground, he never cried in front of anyone. But at this moment, with his little girl looking at him in this way...he broke down. Tears flowed down his cheeks. He cowered in the corner of his bed, trying to keep himself away from her. He almost hurt her. And now, she was afraid of him.
"I'm so sorry, Isabel. I didn't mean to! I swear. I was just scared! I didn't want to hurt you. I had a really bad dream. I was terrified. I'm sorry. I'm so so so so sorry. I'm a horrible person." He sobbed, unable to stop the heaving of his chest. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't think straight. He was a horrible person. He always had been, and he always would be.
"P-papa?" Isabel breathed.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Levi cried.
All of the sudden, he felt her sit down on the bed next to him. She seemed hesitant at first, but she eventually eased herself into a hug, still trembling.
"You're safe." She whispered.
Levi continued to sob. "I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. I would never hurt you, Isabel. I promise."
Her tears soaked his shirt. "You got scared. I scared too."
"I know. I'm sorry I scared you."
"Had nightmare," Isabel said.
Levi nodded, gently putting an arm around her to bring her close. She didn't shudder at his touch and instead curled into him.
"Forgive you," Isabel said.
Levi sobbed even harder. Despite scaring her, she somehow was able to forgive him. He would never deserve her.
"I'm sorry."
"S'okay. I know you don't hurt me." Isabel said.
"I would never," Levi confirmed.
"Still love you." She said.
Levi kissed her head. "I love you, sweetheart. I promise I'll never stop loving you. I'll always be here. I'm here."
AN: Just wanted to take a moment and say that if you have any requests for what you want to see in this story, I am open to suggestions! If you want to see certain interactions between characters, I will do my best to make it happen. In the next couple of chapters, you will get to see Isabel interact with Jean, but no spoilers ;). I absolutely love hearing from all of you, so if you have any suggestions at all, don't be afraid to share! (I will give you a shoutout too!)