Chapter 2: Partners in Crime
"Are you sure this is the right place?"
The two of them observed the building from a slight distance, safely out of the way of the streams of workers heading for the front door. Eris nodded.
"Jack tipped me off. Says there's definitely something not right going on here, but there's too much trouble with the rift for his lot to come up and check it out."
"Alright then. Let's go."
Carefully avoiding the attention of anyone else walking towards the building, the Doctor led the way to the nearest fire door and sonicked the lock, hoping that the sparks didn't catch anyone's eye.
Having chosen the slightly more orthodox method of entry, Donna Noble showed the guard at the reception desk her ID card.
"Good morning, Adipose Industries."
"Donna Noble, Health and Safety."
He nodded, happy with the identification, and she continued through the building. There were plenty of non-staff people in the building today - the head of the company was giving a presentation about the product that had taken the market by storm, so it wouldn't be too difficult for her to blend in with the multitudes of journalists that would be attending.
Working their way through the lower corridors, the Doctor and Eris took note of every door, hoping that at least one of them would give way to a good hiding place. They passed a security guard, and just to make sure any suspicion was dispelled, he flashed the psychic paper.
"John Smith and Eris Stewart, Health and Safety."
Unbeknownst to all three of them, they ended up being only a few metres away from each other. Donna had taken a seat in the lecture hall amongst the journalists, glad that she had chosen health and safety as her cover instead - she couldn't understand half the words being used and would never have been able to come up with a convincing enough question if asked. Eris and the Doctor, meanwhile, were watching from the projection room as Miss Foster talked through the product.
"Adipose Industries, the twenty-first century way to lose weight. No exercise, no diet, no pain. Just lifelong freedom from fat. The Holy Grail of the modern age. And here it is. You just take one capsule. One capsule, once a day for three weeks, and the fat, as they say-"
The narrator on the film behind her played their slogan.
"The fat just walks away."
A couple of rows in front of Donna, a woman raised her hand.
"Excuse me, Miss Foster. If I could? I'm Penny Carter, science correspondent for The Observer. There are a thousand diet pills on the market, a thousand con men stealing people's money. How do we know the fat isn't going straight into your bank account?"
Miss Foster smiled coldly. "Oh, Penny, if cynicism burnt up calories, we'd all be as thin as rakes. But if you want the science, I can oblige."
They switched to the narrator again. "Adipose Industries. The Adipose capsule is composed of a synthesised mobilising lipase, bound to a large protein molecule. The mobilising lipase breaks up the triglycerides stored in the adipose cells, which then enter…"
Up in the projection room, Eris scoffed quietly.
"Do any of them actually believe this is how it works? That explanation has more holes in than a fishing net."
The tape finished, and Miss Foster continued.
"One hundred percent legal, one hundred percent effective."
But Penny didn't quite seem satisfied yet. "But, can I just ask, how many people have taken the pills to date?"
"We've already got one million customers within the Greater London area alone, but from next week, we start rolling out nationwide. The future starts here. And Britain will be thin."
The next stop for them was one of the call centres - and of course, they ended up in the same one. Somehow, not one of them saw the other as they moved to listen in on the phone calls.
"Good morning. I represent Adipose Industries. That's a three week course of pills for a special price of forty five pounds."
"Donna Noble, Health and Safety. Don't mind me."
"We deliver within three working days."
"John Smith and Eris Stewart, Health and Safety. Don't mind us."
As the man Donna was sat in with continued talking, she examined the free gift the company was handing out with each order - a gold necklace with a pill shaped charm. Merely a few cubicles away, Eris was doing the same.
"The box comes with 21 days worth of pills, a full information pack, and our special free gift, an Adipose Industries pendant."
"It's made of eighteen carat gold, and it's yours for free. No, we don't give away pens, sorry. No, I can't make an exception, no."
As he ended his phone call, Donna slipped the necklace into her pocket.
"I'll just need to keep this for testing. And I just need a list of your customers. Could you print it off?"
"I suppose so."
"Where's the printer?"
"Just over there, by the plant."
She peered over the top of the cubicle wall.
"Which plant, that plant?"
"Yeah, that's the one."
"Lovely."
Also after the list of customers, the Doctor wanted a printed copy too. He popped his head above the cubicle.
"That's the printer there?"
The woman they had intruded on nodded. "By the plant, yeah."
"Brilliant."
And so it went, back and forth, as the two of them looked for exactly the same information and never spotted each other.
"Does it need a code? Last place I worked, the printer needed a code."
"No, I can do it from here."
"Has it got paper?"
"Yeah, Jimbo keeps it stocked."
Hearing the doors open, Eris grabbed the back of the Doctor's jacket and pulled him back down into his seat.
"It's Miss Foster. Shut up and don't draw any attention to us."
The room fell silent as she moved to stand in the centre, flanked by guards.
"Excuse me, everyone, if I could have your attention. On average, you're each selling forty Adipose packs per day. It's not enough. I want one hundred sales per person per day. And if not, you'll be replaced. Because if anyone's good at trimming the fat, it's me. Now. Back to it."
The hush remained until the door was firmly closed behind her, and the sighs of relief were audible. Once the tension dissipated, he turned to the call worker again.
"Anyway, if you could print that off. Thanks."
He made to stand up, but she stopped him, passing over a piece of paper.
"Thanks, then. Oh, what's that?"
"My telephone number."
He was vaguely aware of Eris struggling to hold in laughter next to him as a blank look crossed his face.
"What for?"
"Health and Safety. You be health, I'll be safety."
Catching on, he floundered for a moment before managing a flustered response.
"Ah. Ah. But that contravenes er, paragraph five, subsection C. Sorry."
Almost running, he dragged Eris away from the desk so they could collect the information from the printer - but the sheet wasn't there. He checked every part of the machine, but it was nowhere to be seen. Seeing the dread in his eyes at the thought of going back to speak with the woman, Eris rolled her eyes and went back there herself.
"Hi, sorry to disturb you again. That list doesn't seem to have come through to the printer, do you mind trying to send it through again?"
Of course, neither of them noticed Donna leaving the area with a sheet of paper in one hand.
Choosing the first name on the list, she made her way to the address and knocked on the door.
"Stacy Campbell?"
The woman who answered the door was clearly in the middle of getting ready to go out somewhere nice, and looked a little confused at the appearance of someone she didn't know at the door. "Who wants to know?"
"My name's Donna. I represent Adipose Industries, and you're on the list of our valued customers."
Hearing this, Stacy was eager to let her in and sing her praises.
"It's been fantastic. I've started the pills on Thursday. Five days later, I've lost eleven pounds."
"And no side effects or anything?"
"No, I feel fantastic. It's a new lease of life. Now, what do you think about these earrings. Do they work?"
The earrings in question were large and tacky-looking, made of thick purple plastic. But of course Donna wasn't going to say anything like that in this woman's own home, it wouldn't be polite.
"Yeah, lovely. You going on a date?"
Stacy scoffed. "I'm doing the opposite. I'm dumping him. I can do better than him now. Right, I won't be long. If the taxi beeps, give me a shout. Won't be long!"
She went upstairs and closed the bathroom door behind her, leaving Donna to wander around her living room. She poked about among the random ornaments, looking at the photos in their little frames and seeing the visible difference between the Stacy in them and the one she was speaking to now.
Sitting down, she remembered the Adipose pendant she had taken earlier, and held it up in the light. There was a fine seam between the two halves of the capsule charm, and she twisted at the bottom one absentmindedly.
In the bathroom, some very strange things were happening. Poor Stacy had no idea how to react as the skin of her stomach shifted, bulged outwards, and then budded off to form a small jelly-baby shaped creature. It hopped into the sink and stared back up at her. It was a greyish-white sort of colour, with tiny eyes and a tiny toothless mouth. She whimpered, and faintly heard Donna calling up the stairs.
"You all right up there?"
She tried to keep the shake out of her voice. "Yeah."
Another creature appeared, gurgling, and she felt sickness rise in her throat.
"What are you? What are you?"
Standing at the food of the stairs, a little concerned by how long the woman had been gone, Donna called up again.
"I like what you've done with the hall. Stacy? Are you all right? I wouldn't mind a little visit myself. Everything all right in there?"
When she got no response, she made her way up there and knocked on the bathroom door.
"It's only me. Do you mind if I pop to the loo? Stacy?"
Inside, Stacy was patting over every inch of her body - because everywhere, her skin was rippling and bulging out.
"Oh, help me. Oh my God, help me!"
Alarmed now, Donna tried to open the door. "What is it, what's wrong? Stacy!"
There was a scream, then the sound of something hitting the floor. Shoving against the wood, she finally managed to break through the lock and burst in, only to see a pile of clothing in the middle of the floor - and one of the little white creatures as it jumped from the windowsill.
After the flirting incident back in the office, the Doctor adamantly refused to see the first person on the list. It might have been a logical place to start, but Miss Stacy Campbell could well be just as interested as the woman from the call centre. And he really didn't think he could cope with that again. Teasing him all the way up to the front door of the house they had picked, Eris was the one to knock.
"Mister Roger Davey? We're calling on behalf of Adipose Industries. Just need to ask you a few questions, if that's alright."
He let them in, taking a little too long to look Eris up and down for the Doctor's liking before taking them into the living room.
"I've been on the pills for two weeks now. I've lost fourteen kilos."
"That's the same amount every day?"
"One kilo exactly. You wake up, and it's disappeared overnight. Well, technically speaking, it's gone by ten past one in the morning."
He frowned. "What makes you say that?"
Roger shrugged. "That's when I get woken up. Might as well weigh myself at the same time. It is driving me mad. Ten minutes past one, every night, bang on the dot without fail, the burglar alarm goes off. I've had experts in, I've had it replaced, I've even phoned Watchdog. But no, ten past one in the morning, off it goes."
Eris looked intrigued. "But with no burglars?"
"Nothing. I've given up looking."
Something occurred to him, and the Doctor nodded towards the front door.
"Tell me, Roger. Have you got a cat flap?"
He led them to it, and the three of them crouched down to peer through it. "It was here when I bought the house. I've never bothered with it, really. I'm not a cat person."
"No, I've met cat people. You're nothing like them."
"Is that what it is, though? Cats getting inside the house?"
"Well, thing about cat flaps is, they don't just let things in, they let things out as well."
"Like what?"
Having the exact same idea, the Doctor and Eris murmured in synchrony.
"The fat just walks away."
Standing up properly, the Doctor offered a handshake.
"Well, thanks for your help. Tell you what, maybe you could lay off the pills for a week or so."
An odd beeping noise came from one of his pockets and Eris reached in, pulling out an odd looking three-lobed gizmo.
"Ah, that's important. We should go. Nice meeting you!"
The two of them followed the signal - which was made far more difficult by the fact that the Doctor had built the device himself, which meant that it probably wasn't anywhere near as effective as it could be. A large black van very nearly hit the pair of them as they moved down the street, and the fact that the gadget chirped excitedly as it passed was very encouraging. They ran to chase after it, painfully unaware that Donna was just around the corner, having been stopped by a taxi driver.
"Stacy Campbell?"
Still shaking a little, she had no idea what exactly to say to him. "No, she's gone."
"Gone where?"
"She's just gone."
He rolled his eyes and switched his availability sign back on.
"Oh, great. Thanks for nothing."
He drove off, and she stood and watched for a moment before deciding to head back home. She had had more than enough activity for one evening.
Out in the next street, the Doctor and Eris had lost the signal. Giving in for now, they decided to head back to the Tardis, completely unaware that they had been less than five metres away from their old friend the entire time.
In her office, Miss Foster was meticulously going over the security footage. Something hadn't felt right ever since she'd come into work in the morning, and she was determined to figure out what. The random parthenogenesis of one of the customers had confirmed her fears - an outsider had got in.
"It seems we have a case of industrial espionage. One touch and the capsule bio-tunes itself to it's owner, but someone must have introduced a second raw capsule. Therefore, one of these people is a thief." She watched closely as on the screen, she walked into the call centre floor and spoke to the workers there. A figure caught her eye and she paused the recording, tapping the screen and indicating to her guards.
"There, oh yes, there she is. Now, what shall we do with her?"
Closing the front door as quietly as possible, Donna pressed her back against the wall and let her head fall back against it. She took a moment to breathe - but that was the only moment of peace that she got, as her mum shouted through from the kitchen.
"And what time's this?"
She groaned before calling back. "How old am I?"
"Not old enough to use a phone."
Tired, and knowing she couldn't avoid her mum indefinitely, she made her way through to the kitchen and made a cup of tea before sitting down. Her mum continued to have a go at her.
"I thought you were only moving back for a couple of weeks. Look at you. I mean, you're never gonna find a flat, not while you're on the dole. And it's no good sitting there, dressed up, looking like you're job hunting. You've got to do something. It's not like the 1980s."
She got up to get some biscuits, sat down again, and opened the pack. Still, her mum had more to say.
"No one's unemployed these days except you. How long did that job with Health and Safety last? Two days, and then you walk out. 'I have other plans.' Well, I've not seen them. And it's no good sitting there dreaming. No one's going to come along with a magic wand and make your life all better."
Finishing her drink, Donna sighed and stood up.
"Where's Grandad?"
Her mum huffed. "Where do you think he is! Up the hill. He's always up the hill."
In amongst the little patches in the allotment, her Grandad had his telescope and camping stool set up, gazing out into the skies above the green spaces where the light pollution was less of a problem. She wandered up to him, holding a full flask. He glanced back at the sound of footsteps, grinning.
"Aye, aye. Here comes trouble."
"Permission to board ship, sir?"
"Permission granted. Was she nagging you?"
She sighed. "Big time. Brought you a thermos."
He accepted it gratefully. "Oh, ta."
"You seen anything?"
"Yeah, I've got Venus, up there with an apparent magnitude of minus three point five. At least, that's what it says in my little book."
He pulled the blanket off his chair and spread it on the ground so she could sit next to him.
"Here, come and see. Come on. Here you go. Right? That's the only planet in the Solar System named after a woman."
Looking through the telescope at the little planet, she grinned.
"Good for her. How far away is that?"
"Oh, it's about twenty six million miles. But we'll get there, one day. In a hundred years time we'll be striding out amongst the stars. Jiggling about with all them aliens. Just you wait."
"You really believe in all that stuff, don't you?"
"It's all over the place these days. If I wait here long enough…"
"I don't suppose you've seen a little blue box?"
He looked at her oddly. "Is that slang for something?"
She laughed. "No, I mean it. If you ever see a little blue box flying up there in the sky, you shout for me, Gramps. Oh, you just shout."
"Do you know, I don't understand half the things you say these days."
"Nor me."
He put an arm around her. "No, fair dos. You've had a funny old time of it lately. There was poor old what's his name, Lance, bless him, and that barmy old Christmas. I wish you'd tell us what really happened."
"I know. It's just, the things I've seen, sometimes I think I'm going mad. I mean, even tonight I was in a... Doesn't matter."
"Well, you're not yourself, I'll give you that. You just, you seem to be drifting, sweetheart."
"I'm not drifting. I'm waiting."
"What for?"
She shrugged. "The right man."
At that, he cackled. "Same old story. A man!"
"No, I don't mean like that. But, he's real. I've seen him. I've met him, just once, and then I let him fly away."
"Well, there you are. Go and find him."
"I've tried. He's nowhere."
He nudged her, not liking the despondent note in her tone. "Oi, not like you to give up. Do you know, I remember when you were about six years old, your mother said no holiday this year. So off you toddled, all on your own and you got on a bus to Strathclyde. Ha! We had the police after you and everything. Ha, where's she gone, then. Where's that girl, hey?"
She nodded.
"You're right. Because he's still out there, somewhere. And I'll find him, Gramps. Even if I have to wait a hundred years, I'll find him."
Inside the Tardis, the Doctor had a comically large magnifying glass in one hand as he examined the pendant.
"Oh, fascinating. Seems to be a bio-flip digital stitch, specifically for-"
He looked up and realised he was talking to an empty console room.
"Eris?"
She popped her head around one of the door frames, a towel around her shoulders and her deep brown hair dripping against it.
"What?"
"Where were you?"
She rolled her eyes. "Don't you ever listen? I told you I was going for a shower. I swear it's like you live in your own little world sometimes."
"Sorry. Anyway, this necklace is a bit more complicated than we first thought. Come and take a look."
She moved to join him, holding the little gold pendant between her fingers.
"Any idea what it could be used for?"
"Not exactly. But whatever it is, it can't be good."
Morning came, and Donna made sure she was up early enough to get out of the house before her mum did. Indeed, as she was leaving, her mum followed her out wearing a pale blue dressing gown and hair curlers.
"It's my turn for the car. What you need it for?"
She huffed. "A quick getaway." And before yet another argument could start, she got into the car and drove off, heading back to the call centre. Parking in an alleyway, she retraced her steps from the day before, going to the front entrance. Had she stayed in the alleyway any longer, she would have been there when the Tardis materialised. This time, rather than going to the work spaces, she found an empty cubicle in one of the ladies' bathrooms and settled in, prepared to be there for a while. Several floors below, the Doctor and Eris tucked themselves into one of the cupboards they had scoped out before, also ready to wait for the end of the work day.
Crammed amongst stacks of cleaning products, resting their backs on ladders stacked against the wall, the two of them sat with their knees touching, playing catch with a small spool of green string that the Doctor had found in one of his many pockets.
"What time will all the staff be out of the building, do you think?"
"Oh, around 6 o'clock I'd say."
"And it's half past nine now."
"Yep."
"So we'll be in here for the next nine hours."
"Yep."
"Please, kill me now."
The hours dragged by, and finally, it was time for them to make a move. Stretching, the duo in the cupboard shook out the pins and needles in their legs and started to head upstairs, while Donna left the cubicle she had claimed in the morning. Her phone rang, and she ducked back into the cubicle to answer it, keeping her voice low.
"Not now."
Her mum tutted. "I need the car. Where are you?"
"I can't. I'm busy."
"Why are you whispering?"
She was very glad her mum wasn't there to see her rolling her eyes. "I'm in church."
On the other end of the line, her mum scoffed. "What are you doing in church?"
"Praying."
"Huh, bit late for that, madam."
Faintly, she could hear her grandad in the background. "What's she in church for?"
"Hush, you. Go up the hill. But I need the car. I'm going out with Suzette. She's asked all the Wednesday girls. Apparently she's been on those Adipose pills. She says she looks marvellous."
Suddenly, footsteps became audible outside the bathroom door and she hung up, tucking her feet up underneath her where she sat on the toilet seat. The outer door was slammed open, and the sound of heels on the tiled floor signalled Miss Foster's appearance.
"We know you're in here, so why don't you make this nice and easy and show yourself? I'm waiting. I warn you, I'm not a patient woman. Now, out you come." There was no movement - Donna certainly wasn't going to give in so easily. "Right. We'll do it the hard way. Get her."
The guards moved to kick in each of the cubicle doors. With every bang, she flinched. They got closer and closer - and then they stopped.
"There you are."
The sound of a familiar voice from the next cubicle made Donna realise she'd had a very narrow escape.
"I've been through the records, Foster, and all of your results have been faked. There's something about those pills you're not telling us."
"Oh, I think I'll be conducting this interview, Penny."
And they escorted her out of the bathroom, leaving it in silence once again.
Taking a minute to make sure they were definitely gone, she then left and followed the same path they had taken.
Having gone all the way up to the roof, the Doctor and Eris used the window cleaner's cradle to descend on the outside of the building to the level of Miss Foster's office. Hopefully, she would be in there and they'd be able to listen in on a conversation with whoever she was helping. They got far more than they bargained for. Ducking below the window frame as she entered with her guards and the journalist, they shared a stethoscope to eavesdrop.
"You've got no right to do this. Let me go! This is ridiculous."
"Sit there."
"I'm phoning my editor."
"I said sit."
"You can't tie me up. What sort of a country do you think this is?"
Miss Foster smirked. "Oh, it's a beautifully fat country. And believe me, I've travelled a long way to find obesity on this scale."
"So, come on then, Miss Foster, those pills. What are they?"
Careful to make sure she wasn't seen, Donna peered through the circular window in the office door.
"Well, you might just as well have a scoop, since you'll never see it printed. This-" she held up one of the capsules "-is the spark of life."
Penny raised an eyebrow. "And what's that supposed to mean?"
"Officially, the capsule attracts all the fat cells and flushes them away. Well, it certainly attracts them. That part's true. But it binds the fat together and galvanises it to form a body."
"What do you mean, a body?"
"I am surprised you never asked about my name. I chose it well. Foster. As in foster mother. And these are my children."
Opening a drawer in the desk, she took out one of the little creatures and placed it on the flat surface, watching as it toddled about.
"You're kidding me. What the hell is that?"
Hearing this, the pair in the cradle slowly rose up to look into the office, needing to see the thing for themselves.
"Adipose. It's called an Adipose. Made out of living fat."
"But I don't understand."
"From ordinary human people."
The rest of the conversation became irrelevant as Eris elbowed the Doctor sharply in the ribs, pointing towards the inner door with an ear-to-ear grin. Finally, the three of them saw each other. The conversation that followed, was, of course, entirely silent. But the point was still very clear.
"Donna?"
"Doctor? Eris!"
"But what? What? What?!"
"Oh my god!"
"But how?"
"It's me!"
Eris nodded. "Yes, we had noticed."
Donna looked absolutely delighted. "Oh, this is brilliant."
The Doctor was, understandably, still stuck on the confused stage.
"What the hell are you doing there?"
"I was looking for you."
"What for?"
Thinking for a moment, she accompanied the next part with hand gestures in an attempt to make it easier for them to understand. "I read it on the internet. Weird. Crept along. Heard them talking. Hid. Saw you-"
Mid-motion, she stopped dead. Miss Foster was staring between the two halves of the conversation with the look of a teacher who'd caught two students gossiping during a test.
"Are we interrupting you?"
Eris signalled to Donna. "Run!"
"Get her."
Zapping the office door with the sonic through the window, the Doctor managed to deadlock it and buy her a little more time. Then, he turned it on the cradle control mechanism and sent the two of them back up to the roof. The second they had their feet on solid ground, they made a beeline for the staircase and practically threw themselves down it.
Just four flights above Miss Foster's office, they collided with Donna, ending up in a very tight three-way hug. Naturally, Donna started babbling straight away.
"Oh, my God. I don't believe it. Eris, you look incredible! And Doctor… God, you've even got the same suit! Don't you ever change?"
Aware of footsteps below, he sighed. "Yeah, thanks, Donna. Not right now." The guards were catching up, and he took her hand. "Just like old times!"
And they headed back the way the time travellers had come, acutely aware that the guards were catching up.
Once on the roof, the Doctor sonicked the door locked as Eris moved to switch on the controls for the cradle again. Meanwhile, Donna was chattering away, seemingly unbothered by the fact they had been chased up there.
"Because I thought, how do you find the Doctor? And then I just thought, look for trouble and then he'll turn up. So I looked everywhere. You name it. UFOs, sightings, crop circles, sea monsters. I looked, I found them all. Like that stuff about the bees disappearing, I thought, I bet he's connected. Because the thing is, Doctor, I believe it all now. You opened my eyes. All those amazing things out there, I believe them all. Well, apart from that replica of the Titanic flying over Buckingham Palace on Christmas Day. I mean, that's got to be a hoax."
He frowned over at her.
"What do you mean, the bees are disappearing?"
"I don't know. That's what it says on the internet. Well, on the same site, there was all these conspiracy theories about Adipose Industries and I thought, let's take a look."
Sonicking the controls for an extra power boost, he hopped into the cradle and helped Eris in before extending a hand to Donna.
"In you get!"
"What, in that thing?"
"Yes, in that thing."
"But if we go down in that, they'll just call us back up again."
"No, no, no, because I've locked the controls with a sonic cage. I'm the only one that can control it. Not unless she's got a sonic device of her own, which is very unlikely."
As Donna relented and got in, Eris punched him in the arm.
"You saying things like that only ever makes things worse."
They descended, stopping at the window above the one for Miss Foster's office. A quick look upwards confirmed their fears - the woman and her security morons were standing at the edge. She had a sonic device against the controls.
"Hold on. Hold on. We can get in through the window."
Unfortunately, the sonic seemed to have little effect on the latch.
"Can't get it open!"
Seeing a couple of loose tools in the bottom of the cradle, Eris grabbed them and passed one to Donna.
"Smash it?"
"Smash it."
As the three of them tried to break through the glass, Miss Foster aimed her sonic - a sleek black pen - at one of the steel cables. It started to burn through with a fizz, and Donna looked up.
"She's cutting the cable!"
It snapped, tipping Donna out and slamming Eris against the side of the cradle. Just about hanging on, the Doctor looked down. His daughter was still safely inside, but Donna was hanging in the air, clinging to a narrow rebar attached to the broken cable.
"Donna!"
"Doctor!"
"Hold on!"
"I am!"
High above, Miss Foster started to sonic the second cable. But this time he was ready, and he aimed upwards, burning her hand with the screwdriver and causing her to drop it. He leant back to catch it, but it slipped through his fingers. Hearts stopping, he looked down - only to see that Eris had stretched herself out of the cradle to catch it. She passed it up to him, nodding towards the windows.
"Get inside!"
He finally managed to get it open and clambered through, sprinting down the nearest stairs as Donna struggled to maintain her grip.
Reaching down, Eris managed to wrap her hand around her friend's wrist, holding on tight.
"It's alright, I've got you! I'm not letting go!"
Only just audible above the sounds of the traffic below, Donna grumbled.
"This is all your fault. I should've stayed at home."
"I promise you can have a go at us later if you like! Just hang in there a little bit longer."
Arriving in Miss Foster's office, the Doctor completely ignored the journalist tied to the chair in front of the desk and ran straight to the window, opening it and grabbing Donna's legs. The journalist stared at him, bewildered.
"Is anyone going to tell me what's going on?"
"What are you, a journalist?"
"Yes."
"Well, make it up."
Unfortunately, getting Donna back through the window was proving to be harder than he had first thought.
"I've got you. I've got you. Stop kicking!"
After a lot of careful manouvering, she was safely inside, and Eris was able to shimmy down the cable after her. Her feet had barely touched the floor when Donna glared at them both.
"I was right. It's always like this with you two, innit?"
He grinned. "Oh, yes! And off we go."
They made for the door, but were interrupted by the young woman in the chair.
"Oi!"
"Sorry!"
He sonicked the ropes and they fell to the floor.
"Now do yourself a favour. Get out."
Without waiting to see if she did or not, the three of them started to run again, working their way down through the building.
As it happened, their escape through the call floor was cut short by the appearance of Miss Foster and her guards.
"Well, then. At last."
Donna managed a tiny wave. "Hello."
Next to her, Eris put on her sweetest smile. "Nice to meet you, I'm Eris, this is Donna, and that's the Doctor."
She raised an eyebrow at the three of them. "Partners in crime. And evidently off-worlders, judging by your sonic technology."
The Doctor nodded. "Oh, yes, I've still got your sonic pen. Nice. I like it. Sleek. It's kind of sleek."
Making a big show of looking it over, Donna nodded. "Oh, it's definitely sleek."
"Yeah, and if you were to sign your real name, that would be?"
Miss Foster's face remained neutral. "Matron Cofelia of the Five Straighten Classabindi Nursery Fleet. Intergalactic Class."
Eris pulled a face. "A wet nurse, using humans as surrogates."
"I've been employed by the Adiposian First Family to foster a new generation after their breeding planet was lost."
He scoffed. "What do you mean lost? How do you lose a planet?"
"Oh, politics are none of my concern. I'm just here to take care of the children on behalf of the parents."
Donna raised an eyebrow. "What, like an outer space super nanny?"
"Yes, if you like."
"So. So those little things, they're, they're made out of fat, yeah, but that woman, Stacy Campbell, there was nothing left of her."
"Oh, in a crisis the Adipose can convert bone and hair and internal organs. Makes them a little bit sick, poor things."
"What about poor Stacy?"
His expression now stony, the Doctor folded his arms.
"Seeding a level five planet is against galactic law."
She seemed completely unbothered. "Are you threatening me?"
"I'm trying to help you, Matron. This is your one chance, because if you don't call this off, then I'll have to stop you."
"I hardly think you can stop bullets."
Using that as their cue, her guards took aim.
Eris moved to stand in front of Donna.
"Now, hang on a moment. I've got a little theory I'd like to test out, just for a moment."
The Doctor joined in. "Yes, just one more thing, before dying. Do you know what happens if you hold two identical sonic devices against each other?"
She paused for a moment. "No."
"Nor me. Let's find out."
And he activated both his screwdriver and her pen, holding the business ends together. The result was an awful resonating noise that left everyone in the room covering their ears and flinching back, agonised. A window shattered nearby, and snapping out of the spell, Donna grabbed his arm.
"Come on!"
The noise stopped, and the three of them legged it before Miss Foster and her goons had the chance to recover.
Sprinting the whole way, they ran down to the cupboard where the time travellers had been hiding earlier. Donna pulled a face as the Doctor started throwing the contents out into the hallway.
"Well, that's one solution. Hide in a cupboard. I like it."
Once it was empty, he slid back a panel in the back wall, revealing a large green machine.
"I've been hacking into this thing all day because the matron's got a computer core running through the centre of the building. Triple deadlocked. But now I've got this," he waved her sonic pen, "I can get into it. She's wired up the whole building."
Hearing footsteps from the direction they had come, Eris grabbed a bit of kit that she'd put together earlier in case of someone coming after them.
"We need a bit of privacy. I'll be right back."
She hadn't even been gone a full minute when the sound of an electrical buzz bounced through the hallway. When she returned, she looked slightly frazzled, and her hair smelled a little smoky.
"Electrical forcefield. It didn't kill them, it was just enough to knock them out."
Still interfering with the alien technology, the Doctor frowned.
"Why's she wired up the tower block? What's it all for?"
As he continued tinkering, Donna spoke.
"You look older."
He raised an eyebrow. "Thanks."
"Still on your own?"
"Yup. Well, no. I had this friend. Martha she was called. Martha Jones. She was brilliant. And I destroyed half her life. But she's fine, she's good. She's gone."
"What about Rose?"
"Still lost. I thought you were going to travel the world?"
She scoffed. "Easier said than done. It's like I had that one day with you, and I was going to change. I was going to do so much. Then I woke up the next morning, same old life. It's like you were never there. And I tried. I did try. I went to Egypt. I was going to go barefoot and everything. And then it's all bus trips and guidebooks and don't drink the water, and two weeks later you're back home. It's nothing like being with you. I must have been mad turning down that offer."
"What offer?"
"To come with you."
"Come with me?"
"Oh yes, please!"
The computer interrupted his response. "Inducer activated."
Eris pulled a face at the newly lit circuitry.
"What's it doing now?"
"She's started the programme."
It took him a few moments to figure out exactly what the programme was doing.
"So far they're just losing weight, but the Matron's gone up to emergency parthenogenesis."
Remembering what she'd seen at Stacy's house, Donna blanched. "And that's when they convert-"
"Skeletons, organs, everything. A million people are going to die. Got to cancel the signal."
He reached into a pocket, only to realise that Eris was already unscrewing the pendant. Deciding to ignore her pickpocket tendencies for once, he took the bottom segment and wrapped the fine wire on it around a loose end of the circuit.
"This contains a primary signal. If I can switch it off, the fat goes back to being just fat."
It powered down, and Eris grinned.
"Nice one."
The relief was short lived, however, as the lights within the inducer switched back on, brighter than before.
"Inducer increasing."
He groaned.
"No, no, no, no, no. She's doubled it. I need... Haven't got time. It's too far. I can't override it. They're all gonna die!"
Donna frowned. "Is there anything I can do?"
"Sorry, Donna, this is way beyond you. Got to double the base pulse, I can't…"
"Doctor, tell me. What do you need?"
"I need a second capsule to boost the override, but I've only got the one. I can't save them!"
He was vaguely aware of a gleeful shout behind him before Eris shoved him out of the way, a second capsule in hand. From the chain in Donna's hand, it was obvious where it had come from. The moment she hooked it up to the right wires, the inducer shut off completely.
They waited for almost a minute, just to be sure that it was really out of action. No response. Grinning, Donna pulled both of them into a hug. The moment didn't last, however, as a booming crashing sound came from above.
"What the hell was that?"
"That'll be the nursery." Eris was poking at bits of the inducer again, looking for anything that could let them communicate with the newcomers.
"Fine. When you say nursery you don't mean a creche in Notting Hill."
The Doctor nodded. "Nursery ship."
The screen lit up again, and they shifted to see what was being displayed.
"Incoming signal."
An alien voice rippled through the speakers. Donna listened for a second, then turned to ask,
"Hadn't we better go and stop them?"
Intently focused, forehead scrunched with the effort of translating the language as he heard it, he shushed her. "Hang on. Instructions from the Adiposian First Family."
Examining the wiring again, Eris whistled lowly.
"She's wired up the tower block to convert it into a levitation post. That must have taken a hell of a lot of work."
Eyes wide, the Doctor stepped back.
"Ooo. Oh. We're not the ones in trouble now. She is!"
The three of them burst out onto the roof, unable to do anything but stare up at the colossal ship above. By now, most of the newborn Adipose had been taken into the ship, with the last few making their way up through the light beams. Donna sighed.
"What you going to do then? Blow them up?"
The Doctor shook his head. "They're just children. They can't help where they come from."
"Oh, that makes a change from last time. That Martha must've done you good."
"She did, yeah. Yeah. She did. She fancied me."
She choked on a laugh. "Mad Martha, that one. Blind Martha. Charity Martha."
Eris grinned, and the three of them stood there waving at the little white figures.
We're waving at actual fat."
Her dad pulled a face. "Actually, as a diet plan, it sort of works. There she is!"
Miss Foster was floating upwards, a little below the last few Adipose. She stopped just above the level of the roof, and he ran forwards to extend a hand.
"Matron Cofelia, listen to me."
"Oh, I don't think so, Doctor. And if I never see you again, it'll be too soon."
"Oh, why does no one ever listen. I'm trying to help. Just get across to the roof. Can you shift the levitation beam?"
"What, so that you can arrest me?"
He groaned. "Just listen. I saw the Adiposian instructions. They know it's a crime, breeding on Earth. So what's the one thing they want to get rid of? Their accomplice."
"I'm far more than that. I'm nanny to all these children."
"Exactly! Mum and Dad have got the kids now. They don't need the nanny anymore."
As the realisation crossed her face and the final babies were taken into the ship, the levitation beam was switched off. She hung in the air for another second before falling with a scream. The sound was swiftly cut off. Donna cringed back, and Eris put an arm around her.
"I'm sorry. There was nothing we could do to help her."
They watched the ship fly away, making sure it was definitely gone before heading back down through the building.
Down on the street, the Doctor tossed the sonic pen into a nearby bin. As he dusted his hands off, Penny - once again tied to the chair - hobbled towards them, pointing a warning finger.
"Oi, you three. You're just mad. Do you hear me? Mad! And I'm going to report you for… madness."
As she tottered away, Donna shrugged. "You see, some people just can't take it."
He hummed in agreement. "No."
"And some people can. So, then. Tardis! Come on."
Clearly, the universe had one last surprise for the day planned for the little group. There, just a few metres in front of the Tardis, was Donna's car. She rushed to the boot, grinning.
"That's my car! That is like destiny. And I've been ready for this."
It was stacked full of different bags and boxes, and she started unloading them into the Doctor's arms.
"I packed ages ago, just in case. Because I thought, hot weather, cold weather, no weather. He goes anywhere. I've gotta be prepared."
Doing his best to hold onto everything, he pulled a face. "You've got a - a hatbox."
"Planet of the Hats, I'm ready! I don't need injections, do I? You know, like when you go to Cambodia. Is there any of that? Because my friend Veena went to Bahrain, and she…" She faltered slightly. Eris had helped unload the bags into the Tardis' hallway, and now the Doctor just stood by the doors with an odd look on his face.
"You're not saying much."
"No, it's just. It's a funny old life, in the Tardis."
Her heart sank. "You don't want me."
"I'm not saying that."
"But you asked me. Would you rather it was just the two of you?"
As he stood there, looking for the right words, Eris squeezed his hand.
"Trust me, we love having company. But Martha, our friend, the one we travelled with last, she… things happened. Lots of things happened. And a lot of them weren't good."
He sighed. "I just want a mate."
Of all the reactions they had expected, a look of visceral disgust and a full body recoil wasn't one of them.
"You just want to mate?!"
Eris doubled over, wheezing with laughter as he tried to backtrack.
"I just want a mate!"
"You're not mating with me, sunshine!"
"A mate! I want a mate!"
"Well, just as well, because I'm not having any of that nonsense. I mean, you're just a long streak of nothing. You know, alien nothing."
"There we are, then. Okay."
She stared at them both, not quite getting it.
"I can come?"
Recovering from the giggles, Eris still had a grin brighter than the sun.
"If you think you're going anywhere other than us, you're very mistaken."
The Doctor matched her smile. "Yeah. Course you can, yeah. I'd love it."
Moving forwards to hug them both, Donna stopped in her tracks a couple of feet away.
"Car keys."
Both of them blinked, baffled. "What?"
"I've still got my mum's car keys. I won't be a minute!"
As she hurried back down the alleyway, they shrugged at each other and started to move the dozens of bags further inside.
"I know, Mum. I saw it. Little fat people. Listen, I've got to go. I'm going to stay with Veena for a bit."
Her mum wasn't really listening to her - as usual. "It was in the sky!"
"Yeah. I know. Spaceship. But, I've still got the car keys. Look. There is a bin on Brook Street, about thirty feet from the corner. I'm going to leave them in there."
"What, a bin?"
"Yes, that's it. Bin."
"But you can't do that."
She huffed. "Oh, stop complaining. The car's just down the road a bit. Got to go. Really. Got to go. Bye."
"But Donna, you can't-"
Hanging up, Donna threw the keys into the little bin and approached the last few people at the police barriers. Choosing the only person who wasn't already in conversation with someone else, she spoke to the blonde girl.
"Listen, there is this woman that's going to come along. A tall blond woman called Sylvia. Tell her that bin there, all right? It'll all make sense. That bin there."
Without even waiting for a nod, she turned on her heel and jogged back towards the alleyway.
The blonde smiled softly. Just as she'd suspected, the Doctor had been involved in all this.
It might have been a while, but Rose Tyler still knew him better than anyone.
Well, almost anyone.
She walked away from the rail, feeling the familiar buzz as she stepped back through into the world that had now become her home.
Disappearing into the darkness.
Closing the doors behind her, Donna grinned up at the travellers.
"Off we go, then."
The Doctor grinned.
"Here it is. The Tardis. It's bigger on the inside than it is on the outside."
"Oh, I know that bit. Although frankly, you could turn the heating up."
Smirking at the affronted look on her dad's face, Eris gestured to the scanner.
"So, whole wide universe, where do you want to go?"
"Oh, I know exactly the place."
"Which is?"
"Two and a half miles that way."
It had taken a bit of co-ordination, but they had managed to find a way to hover at just the right distance from the Earth. Donna flung the doors open, squinting down at the patch of dim green that was the hill. She grinned.
"He's there!"
Making sure the controls were stable, the others joined her at the doors. There, set up with his chair and telescope and thermos full of tea, was Donna's grandad.
Just as he was starting to pack his things away, a flash of blue caught Wilf's eye. Seeing the faint, rectangular shape high in the sky, he turned to call back towards the house.
"There! Donna, it's, it's the flying blue box!"
Peering through the eyepiece, he gasped. Because up there, standing in the open doorway of the blue shape and waving so hard he was surprised her hand didn't fall off, was his Donna.
"What? That's Donna. Yeah, that's my Donna!"
He looked again, now seeing the two dark haired figures standing just behind her, waving too.
"And that's them. That's them. Hey, that's them! Ha, ha, ha! Go on, gal! Go on, get up there!"
And as that little blue box darted away across the stars, he danced about on his little patch of land, so glad that his granddaughter was getting closer to those stars than he had ever dreamed was possible.
AN: Hello dear friends! I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it - I adore Donna, so getting to write with her properly again feels amazing!
There could be some pretty big breaks between chapter posts between now and Christmas because I'm going back to university and I'll be incredibly busy (thanks, medicine degree) but we'll wait and see how it goes, yeah? Hang in there - some of the chapters to come are stories I've been excited to write since I started writing Rose!
See you soon, and happy reading!
Much love,
Azzie xx