A/N: Greetings all! Sorry I am a little late, but at least I came back right?
Rest assured, no matter how late the updates may seem I am not abandoning the stories this time, I promise!
Just a heads up though, the next chapter will most probably only be out next month :(
Blame adulthood!
Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and hopefully it will be enough to entertain you till the next update!
It had been a cruel journey indeed, but he was slowly beginning to reap the fruits of his hard labor.
Sasuke sneaked shy glances at his wife who was clinging on to his arm as they strolled back home after her discharge from hospital. He walked at a snail's pace, savoring her overt display of affection.
Despite his tremendous shortcomings i.e., nearly ending her life, Hinata seems to be responding quite well to his efforts so far. He briefly worried that she might be a bit of a masochist, but considering his unintentionally gruesome gestures of love, it might actually work in his favor.
That being said, he'd rather not put her in the hospital again.
"We're home." Sasuke sighed as he unlocked their front door and felt her detach. They kicked off their shoes and stepped into the living room; both of them suddenly felt the air shifting the moment the front shut close and it was just the two of them in a space that was solely theirs.
They fidgeted around for a bit before meekly locking eyes, each trying to figure out what the other was thinking.
"Ano," Hinata began with a thoughtful expression on her face. "I am… going to take a bath, okay?"
"Hn." He nodded.
"Then after…" She bit on her bottom lip, her eyelids slowly drooping down as she spoke. "I might take a nap, okay?"
"Okay…" Sasuke cocked his head to the side, raising a quizzical brow at his wife whose cheeks steadily turned redder and redder by the minute.
"Are you still feeling sick? You look a little feverish."
"N-No!" She shook her head, shutting her eyes tight as her face contorted in embarrassment.
"It's just… ah, it's nothing!"
He looked deeply confused as he watched her turn away and scurry to their bedroom with her flushed face buried in her palms.
What was that about?
…
…
…
"Ah!" Sasuke gasped as realization struck, feeling as though he had figured out the meaning of life itself.
Could it be… she was insinuating that they should… bathe together?! Naked?!
Was she expecting him… to join her?! Naked?!
And when she said she was going to take a nap…. Could it be… she wanted to take a naked nap?! With him?!
NAKED?!
PEEK-A-BOO!
"Hinata!"
"Eep!" The startled Hyuuga flung the towel in her grasp across the room as her husband abruptly burst in, nearly separating their bedroom door from its hinges.
"Y-Yes!" She squeaked in reply, blinking at the Uchiha with wide eyes.
Sasuke stood tall with his shoulders square, his dark eyes burning with fiery determination and resolve.
"I would very much like to take a bath with you." The sentence came out smoothly and coherently, much to his surprise. It was impossible to tell that he felt his visceral organs imploding as he spoke.
Hinata's entire body froze still, too stunned to even breathe. She was blushing so intensely that her face was practically glowing. Her quivering lips parted slowly, letting a shaky, quiet breath escape as she attempted to utter a response.
"Sasuke…" She whispered his name in a way that sent chills down his spine.
"I-I… I w-would also –"
"Uchiha-san! Uchiha-san!"
An unfamiliar, muffled voice echoed alongside the sound of persistent knocking against the front door.
Sasuke felt something snap inside him.
He is going to destroy Konoha, for real this time.
He's going to burn everything and everyone to the ground so that he could finally be left alone to peacefully have sex with his wife.
"I'll get it." His voice held its usual monotone, seemingly unbothered by the interference.
Hinata narrowed her eyes at him, concerned about the eerie look in his eyes that contradicted his nonchalant demeanor.
"Okay… but be nice!"
"I'm always nice." He spoke such a blatant lie so effortlessly; it was as though he genuinely believed it.
"I'm serious! People are already scared of you Sasuke! All our neighbors are going to move away at this rate!"
That's the plan.
"I'll be good, I promise." He waved his hand dismissively as he turned on his heel and approached the front door.
Hinata could only offer a silent prayer for the poor soul at their doorstep.
"Uchiha-san! Uchiha –"
The front door abruptly swung open much to the messenger's surprise, revealing the man he had beckoned to in the flesh.
"Ah, Uchiha-san!" The messenger cheerily addressed the ex-avenger, blissfully unaware of the danger he was in. "I have urgent summons from Hokage-sama –" The man yelped as the irritated Uchiha grabbed him by his collar and forcefully yanked him up to eye level, his sharingan activated and emanating murderous intent.
"If this urgency entails anything less than death… you will pay."
The messenger turned white as a sheet in an instant.
"N-N-Nobleman! A nobleman from the land of lightning was found brutally murdered in our territory!" He squealed. "F-Forgive me, Uchiha-san! I-I don't know much else, I-I was just asked to summon your squadron to the Hokage tower!"
Ah shit, someone actually died.
Now he has to work.
Fuck.
Sasuke growled under his breath, releasing the petrified man to tumble clumsily onto the ground – needless to say, the pitiful innocent will most likely quit his job after today.
"I will be at the tower in 5 minutes." He slammed the door shut, showing absolutely no remorse for bringing a fully grown man to tears.
He groaned, sluggishly walking back to his bedroom, having lost all his vigor after receiving the horrid news.
That goddamn nobleman just had to get himself killed.
Sasuke sighed heavily as he stepped into his bedroom, his yearning gaze glued to the petite Hyuuga staring at him accusingly with her hands on her hips.
"Why do you look so guilty? You were mean, weren't you? I'm going to have to bake another batch of apology cookies, Sasuke!" Hinata huffed, pouting angrily.
"Hinata," He breathed a long, heavy sigh as he lamely dragged his feet across the floor towards her with a look of devastation on his face.
"I have to leave."
"Eh?" She blinked at him, bewildered.
"What… did you do?" She gasped, fearing the worst.
"Don't tell me you… k-killed him?"
"For a mission."
"Oh…" Her shoulders slumped in relief.
Thank goodness! She certainly wouldn't be able to make up for a death with apology cookies!
"When do you have to go?"
"Soon. Well… now." He mumbled under his breath, absent mindedly tracing her jaw with his fingers.
"I see…" She murmured solemnly, taking his hand and pressing it against her cheek. "I'll miss you."
"I want to kiss you." He thought out loud, his eyes filled with longing.
"Can I –"
Hinata lunged forward, nearly tripping him over as she wrapped her hands around his neck and planted her lips onto his. His hands slid around her waist, steadying himself as she kissed him with fervor; he felt his sense of duty and responsibility melt away in the heat of her passion.
"Yes." She whispered hotly against his lips as she pulled away, sporting a dreamy, mischievous smile. "You can kiss me again when you come back."
"…Come back from where?" Sasuke slurred, gazing at her in a dazed state.
"Your mission!"
"What mission? There's no mission." He pulled her close and trapped her in a tight embrace, burying his face in her hair.
"Let's go take our bath."
"Sasuke!" She giggled and playfully slapped him on his back.
"You should get going. Hokage-sama is going to get upset if you're late."
"But I need to bathe and look presentable before I see her, no?"
"No."
"How about a rinse?"
"Nope."
"We could wipe each other clean?"
"No! What has gotten into you?" She laughed, surprised by this new, very naughty Sasuke that appeared out of nowhere.
"Fine." He sighed, reluctantly releasing his hold of her.
He should've never told her about that godforsaken mission.
"I'll be here when you get back, okay?" She patted his chest and flashed a warm, consoling smile.
"…How about I just watch you bathe –"
"No!"
"You look like shit." Naruto looked at the glum Uchiha up and down as they leapt through the forest trees that littered the outskirts of Konoha.
"What's got your undies in a twist?"
"Shut up." Sasuke seethed, his dark menacing eyes glaring daggers into thin air, refusing to acknowledge the nosy blonde, evidently frustrated by his situation.
"Hey! I was being a considerate friend, you bastard!"
"You're being annoying."
"Kakashi-sensei! This bastard's being mean!" Naruto called out to his former mentor who wisely kept some distance from the two, foreseeing an inevitable conflict whenever they were on the road together.
"What's new?" The copy nin shrugged.
"He's crankier and meaner than usual –"
Naruto shrieked as a kunai flew his way, nicking off a few strands of his bright hair and lightly scraping his whiskered cheek.
"It would appear so." Kakashi breathed a tired sigh as they all paused in their step, ready to break out into a fight.
Here we go.
"W-What the hell is your problem?!" The jinchuuriki cupped his cheek, staring at his violent friend with wide eyes, acting like this was a shocking and unusual turn of events.
It actually wasn't out of the ordinary at all – their love language involves brutally mutilating each other.
They're the best of friends, really.
"You are my problem."
"You bastard!"
"Alright, alright, let's all calm down." Kakashi grabbed them by their shoulder, trying to prevent them from charging at each other.
"He started it! I was just being nice!" Naruto whined and pointed at the scowling Uchiha.
"I'll be even nicer and give you an instant death." Sasuke activated his doujutsu on cue; his striking crimson orbs glowered menacingly, threatening the flustered blonde.
"K-Kakashi-sensei!"
"Enough, you two." Kakashi droned, shaking his head at his ex-students and their childish antics. It's almost as though time had stood still and they were still those snappy genins who wouldn't let him read his porn in peace.
He's getting too old for this.
"Can't we all at least pretend to be a happy family during the hunt for vicious murderers?"
"You don't understand." Sasuke hissed, swatting away the gloved hand on his shoulder.
"I could've been in a bath with my naked wife."
Naruto blanched.
"Instead, I'm here with you two idiots."
"Ah, I see my book has been serving you well." Kakashi's visible eye glimmered, the outline of his masked lips curved into a wry smile – the mention of nudity has piqued his interest.
"I… I think my ears are bleeding…" Naruto on the other hand, was experiencing a rather nasty bout of PTSD.
"I almost killed her thanks to your book."
"Wow." Kakashi chuckled. "That tends to happen when you get too excited. Pace yourself."
"I think I am going to be sick…" Naruto fell back, dangling upside down with his knees hooked onto the tree branch, his tanned skin slowly turning blue as the conversation delved deeper into the details of Sasuke's sex life.
"It's not like that!" Sasuke barked, blushing scarlet as he held his head in his hands.
"We haven't even… every time we start to… there's always some imbecile getting in the way! Today we… almost –"
"Oh my god!" Naruto cried in agony, grabbing and pulling fistfuls of his unruly blonde hair out of exasperation, nearly scalping himself.
"It's bad enough that you terrorised me and the entire village with your evil erection,"
Sasuke cringed at the bitter memory.
"And now you're talking about doing all these ungodly things to Hinata?! How am I going to look her in the eyes after this?! When did you become such a pervert?!"
"Says the man who invented a technique to immobilise his enemies by bombarding them with a harem of naked women." Sasuke a raised a brow.
"…That's different and you know it." Naruto guiltily turned away and crossed his arms, refusing to engage after being called out.
"If you want some privacy, take her out on a vacation. It's summer, why not go to a beach? That's pretty sexy." Kakashi wiggled his brow.
"Kakashi-sensei what are you saying?! This dirty pervert shouldn't be anywhere near the beach! There are kids there!"
Sasuke couldn't hear a word beyond the mention of a getaway at the beach, his senses dulled out as he lost himself in deep thought – which entirely revolved around the image of Hinata in a swimsuit.
Yes… a vacation at the beach sounds perfect.
"AHHHH! I-It's back! Th-The evil erection is back!"
Oh hell, he forgot to tuck it away.
"Oh my." Kakashi raised a brow.
"Did it get bigger somehow? That's impressive."
"Sasuke…"
"Hm?"
"What do you think…?"
"About what?"
"About this swimsuit."
His eyes fluttered open.
It was blindingly bright, it hurt his eyes.
Slowly, his vision acclimated to the light and he sees a long stretch of white sand littered with empty shells and wet twigs.
Ah… the beach.
"Sasuke,"
He eagerly turned towards the familiar voice seductively calling his name. He felt his blood gush the moment he sees her posing for him under the glaring sun, clad in the skimpiest black bikini he had ever seen.
"Well?" She tucked her hair behind her ear, her hooded eyes piercing right into his soul.
"It's… small." His eyes were glued to her ample breasts that were practically spilling out of her top.
"Is that it?" She giggled, taking slow, long strides to approach him.
"This… people will see." He swallowed, frantically searching around the mat for something to cover her up with.
"Don't worry." She crawled onto his lap and grabbed his shaky hands, bringing them to the smooth expanse of her stomach.
"It's just you and me here." She slid his hands around her torso, securing them onto her lower back.
"We're free to do whatever we want."
"Here? Now…?"
"I can't wait anymore!" The impatient Hyuuga pinned herself against him, rubbing her soft, bountiful mounds against his bare chest, coaxing him to feel more of her.
"Do you know how miserable I've been? Your strong, manly body… it drives me crazy just looking at it! I want you Sasuke… take me now!"
"Hinata, please control yourself. This is embarrassing." He cleared his throat and turned away, feigning disinterest.
"Please Sasuke…" She planted hot, wet kisses all over his face, eagerly nibbling on the patches of skin at the angle of his jaw and the corner of his lips.
"With great erotic powers, comes great responsibility. Take responsibility, my sexy, irresistible man."
"…I guess I have no choice." His hand glided up to hold the back of her head as he leaned forward, his lips lightly caressing hers.
"What do you want me to do?"
"Don't tease me..." She whimpered, wriggling restlessly in his arms. "Kiss me, touch me, ravish me! Please!"
"As you wish."
He kissed her deeply, intensely, unleashing all of his pent up desire as he pried her lips open and abrasively tackled her tongue with his. His hand on her back shifted lower, squeezing her ample buttock and guiding her hips in position so his hardened member could stroke against her warmth. She gasped, breaking their passionate kiss and impulsively arching her back as he grinded against her.
"Fuck…" He groaned, his face contorted in pleasure; the heat of their friction alone was close to driving him over the edge. He could only imagine how it would feel like to be inside of her.
"Hinata…"
"S-Sakura-chan!"
"Wait. What?" Sasuke paused abruptly.
"What did you say…?" He sounded confused, and quite offended.
A very flushed Hinata gazed at him with a vacant expression on her face, cocking her head to the side and bringing a finger to her swollen lips, looking just as confused.
"Sakura-chan?"
That husky, grating voice… it was not Hinata's.
Sasuke jolted awake, his obsidian eyes snapping wide open.
The first thing he registered as he came to, was the bulk of flesh he had cupped in his hand – which appeared to be a buttock indeed, but a very hard, sculpted gluteus of a hard worker.
The second thing he perceived was the heavy weight of a muscular leg draped over his hip.
He felt the life being sucked out of his body as his eyes adapted to the darkness, capturing a pair of cerulean eyes jutting out of their sockets, filled with disgust and desolation.
"S-Sakura-chan?" Naruto sobbed, fresh tears swimming in his eyes.
"…No."
The two fell silent, too horrified to even shift away from their compromising position.
Their eyes shifted to each other's lips, relenting to the bad feeling that welled up in their chest against better judgement.
Naruto instantly broke into tears as he felt the sting of a bite wound on his bottom lip and noted the swell of Sasuke's reddened lips.
"No… not again…" The blonde sniffled.
"Hey now," Kakashi sat up from the other side of the tent, ruffling his messy grey hair, his lazy eye glinting with amusement as he shot them a knowing look.
"I'm feeling really left out here."
"WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!"
"Alright, we're nearing the border. We should be out of this godforsaken country before nightfall." A hulking, heavily tattooed man scrunched the old tattered map in his hands and carelessly stuffed it into the pouch that dangled over his hip.
"This was a mistake, Hanzo." The skinny woman seated beside him nervously wrung her hands and tapped her feet, her pinpoint pupils darting all around the small patch of clearing their group had gathered in, paranoid.
"He was an important man. We shouldn't have gone after him."
"So what?! You expect me to just sit back and let him keep my woman hostage?!"
"Miyu is… well was engaged to him. She's hardly being held hostage in that four storey mansion of his." The archer of the group snorted, not at all hesitant to speak the painful truth, even if it meant risking the wrath of their leader.
"Don't get me wrong though, I am happy we killed that fat, pompous rat. He was annoying."
"Plus, we got all this loot!" A cheery member of the group, a rather hairy dwarf, snickered proudly as he danced around holding up two full bags of gold coins in his small hands.
"That's it…? That's why you killed that nobleman?"
All six members of the troupe assumed their attack stance the moment an unfamiliar voice resonated throughout the clearing, catching them by surprise.
They weren't even slightly aware of a foreign presence nearby.
The fact that this person was able to mask his presence and voluntarily reveal himself within earshot spoke volumes of the skill of their pursuer.
"Show yourself!"
Naruto stepped out from the shadows of the forest trees, his posture was crooked, his usually bright, sparkling blue eyes were dull and dark, his zombie-esque appearance was a testament to his extreme lack of sleep.
"I-It's the kyuubi jinchuuriki!"
"That guy? He… sure looks creepy."
"I heard that!" Naruto barked. "You would look like this too if you got molested by the person you thought was your best friend!"
"It was mutual molestation. We both suffered equal amounts of groping." Sasuke argued from across the opposite side of the clearing, his arrival completely unnoticed by the troupe until he retorted.
"T-There's another one!"
"Eek! This one looks even creepier!"
"Mutual?! Was I the one who grabbed your ass?! I still have your handprint on my ass cheek! And you busted my lip!" Naruto roared, pointing to the raw, red patch of skin on his bottom lip.
"You were the one who clung on to me like a koala in heat!" Sasuke spat, his pale skin turning red as he relived the shame from their shared nightmare.
"What… is happening?" One of the troupe members mumbled under their breath, sending questioning looks to the two very strange Konoha shinobi in their midst.
"I'll tell you what's about to happen."
The dark haired man began to radiate a malicious aura that weighed on the atmosphere; the air around them felt like it was constricting their bodies, trapping them, suffocating them.
It was terrifying.
"I was about to have sex with my wife in a bath. But because of you, I am here instead."
The troupe had lost what little was left of their will to fight as they watched his black eyes stain red; the infamous sharingan glaring at them with the promise of pain.
"Prepare yourselves."
I AM SORRY OK I AM A NOTORIOUS COCK BLOCKER HAHAHAHA I know a lot of you can't wait to see some citrus and I assure you that you all shall be rewarded in due time!
Patience is virtue guys, hehehe.
See you guys soon!