A/N: Buckle up, because Hermione is going through a whirlwind of emotions in this story!
C/W: Angst, a whole lot of drama, but also a good amount of fluff with happy ending. Also slightly NSFW towards the end.
(mentions of Panville, Dreo and Ravender.)
ooo
"Are you looking forward to the reunion tomorrow?" Harry asked, leaning casually against her desk, his eyes sparkling excitedly.
It had been ten years since their graduation from Hogwarts and tomorrow night Neville, or Professor Longbottom as everyone called him now, would host a reunion at Hogwarts. It was going to be a huge deal. Everyone from their year was invited and Neville had been working tirelessly to organise it all.
Hermione bit her lip nervously and gave a non-committal shrug. "I guess…" she replied vaguely.
"You guess?" Harry's asked, raising his eyebrows questioningly.
Hermione let out a deep sigh and looked at him with uncertainty in her eyes.
"I'm sorry, Harry." She said after a short pause. "Of course, I'm looking forward to it." Her lips pulled into stiff smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.
"Why do I sense a 'but' coming?" Harry murmured, waiting for her to elaborate.
"Oh, I don't know." Hermione whined, her voice dripping with apprehension. "It's just… this is my first time going back to Hogwarts since Ron and I broke up and I don't know how I'll handle it."
She wrinkled her nose with frustration. "I know I'm being silly. We broke up for a reason and I don't want him back, it's just that being at Hogwarts will probably bring up a lot of memories and I know he's going with Lavender and… it will feel weird, not going as us."
There was a long moment of silence in which Harry looked at her, his bright green eyes radiating warmth and understanding.
"You're not silly." He said earnestly, giving her a reassuring smile. "Things have changed. We have changed, and sometimes it's hard to come to terms with that.
"I feel like I am." She sighed, scrunching up her face into an embarrassed grimace.
"Do you want to…" Harry shifted nervously from one foot to another. "I mean, would it help if you went with someone else?" he asked awkwardly.
Hermione scoffed. "I'm not asking Cormac!" she replied sternly, her expression turning into one of indignation.
"I'm not talking about McLaggen." Harry huffed, rolling his eyes exasperatedly. "I was thinking…I mean… if you wanted to" He looked a little tense, avoiding Hermione's gaze as he spoke. "You could come as my date?" He finished awkwardly, rubbing his neck nervously as his ears turned an impressive shade of red.
Hermione instantly felt a flush of heat rise into her cheeks, and she let out a small groan as her stomach twisted uncomfortably. Did Harry just offer her on a pity date? Merlin help her! Could she sink any lower?
Face burning with mortification she shook her head firmly "Thanks, Harry. That's really sweet of you." She squeaked, her voice unnaturally high, "but I'm sure I'll be alright."
"Oh. O...ok then." Harry said and his face fell. For a brief second Hermione thought he looked genuinely disappointed, but then his expression turned blank. "I guess I'll see you there." he added, and turned on his heels and left her office.
ooo
"Neville, this looks amazing!" Hermione gasped, mouth slightly agape as she took in her surroundings with wide eyes.
Neville had turned one of the greenhouses of Hogwarts castle into a truly wonderful venue for today's event. The gigantic glass building had been charmed into a mixture of colourful indoor forest and cosy café bar.
Small wooden tables and comfortable chairs were dotted across the room, surrounded by exotic plants with extravagant flowers and lush greenery.
At the far end of the greenhouse was a large all-you-can-eat buffet with all of Hogwarts' most famous delicacies, no doubt provided by the Hogwarts house-elves themselves. Trays laden with a variety of alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages were charmed to float across the room and offer drinks to the guests.
A soft light from floating lanterns was giving everything a warm and cosy sheen; tastefully accented by an enticing sparkle that seemed to be coming from real-life fairies, who were flitting excitedly from one plant to another.
It felt truly magical.
Hermione smiled when she spotted the giant Venomous Tentacular that Neville had managed to tame. It was swaying happily to the beat of the soft, melodic music that was chiming through the hall.
Neville grinned widely at her. "Thanks, Hermione. Pansy did most of the decorating. She has a real eye for detail and is brilliant at making things look beautiful." His expression softened at the thought of his wife and a dreamy smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
Hermione grinned. "How is Pansy? Will she be here today, she must be quite far along now?"
"Oh, she's fine." Neville confirmed "Just the usual pregnancy symptoms. Swollen ankles, sore back, unpredictable temper…" His eyes glinted cheekily at his last words and Hermione couldn't suppress a giggle. "She said she'll pop in later, but probably won't stay very long. She gets exhausted quickly these days."
"Understandable." Hermione nodded. "I'm looking forward to seeing her, though."
"Oi, Neville! Good to see you, man!"
Hermione and Neville looked up to see Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan walk through the entrance of the hall, waving happily at them.
Neville excused himself to go and greet his old friends, leaving Hermione to her own devices. She decided to go on a little stroll through the greenhouse, looking at all the peculiar plants that Neville was growing, and occasionally stopping to greet people and exchange a couple of words with them. So far most of her conversations had been rather short-lived, but she didn't mind.
She had spotted both Harry and Ron, but neither of the them had had time for more than a quick hello, before being pulled away by other people.
Ron was currently at the buffet, piling heaps of food onto his and Lavender's plates while making light conversation with Susan Bones and Hannah Abbot.
Hermione smiled sadly at the scene. It felt so familiar and yet so out of place.
Harry was still near the entrance of the greenhouse, surrounded by a small crowd of people who were firing questions at him, all eager to get a piece of the Chosen One. The raven-haired wizard was navigating the conversation effortlessly, humouring the needy crowd with bright smiles, polite words and friendly pats on their backs. He had really grown into the role as a war-hero over the past decade and was radiating positivity and kindness.
It also didn't hurt that he had really filled out since they'd left school, due to all the hard auror training he went through on a regular basis.
He was standing proudly amongst the others, his strong shoulders squared, pushing his firm chest out in an impressive way.
He was practically oozing with confidence.
Hermione felt a small twinge of annoyance when she saw Tracey Davis wrap her delicate fingers around his firm biceps, pulling him close to whisper something in his ear. She watched as a faint blush crept into Harry's cheeks, before smiling politely back at the witch and giving her a short answer.
His answer must have been hilarious, judging by the bright, tinkling laughter coming from the witch.
Hermione huffed indignantly as she watched the woman's hand wrap tighter around Harry's arm. The ex-Slytherin wouldn't have looked twice at Harry back in school, she thought sourly, and now look at her, flirting shamelessly with him and making a complete fool out of herself.
She had to try hard not to roll her eyes. Of course, all the girls wanted a piece of Harry. He was a bloody war-hero after all, and incredibly handsome in a sweet and gentle kind of way.
She knew Harry would never fall for any of it, but she still couldn't quite help the dull feeling of jealousy that had settled deep in her stomach.
She shrugged it off, thinking that it was probably just because he was her best friend and she would have liked to spend more time with him tonight, and turned away, deciding to direct her focus on something other than Tracey's futile attempts to flirt with him.
ooo
Hermione made her way down the long glass building, studying the lush vegetation that was covering the shimmering window panes, when a peculiar looking shrub caught her eye.
It was fairly small, only waist height, with delicate flowers that were all black by default, but seemed to change colour as Hermione approached. Coming to a halt in front of it, she watched as the soft blooms turned into fiery shades of red, mixed with a few blotches of orange, and a rather ugly shade of yellow. Hermione furrowed her brows, unsure of what to think of the curious plant.
"Ah, you found Neville's latest addition to his proud collection." A soft voice sounded from behind her, and her lips drew into a big, genuine smile.
"Pansy!" she exclaimed. "It's so good to see you. How are you?" She gave the dark-haired woman a warm, but careful hug, trying to avoid squishing her protruding belly too much.
"Oh, I'm fine." Pansy answered breathlessly. "Just waiting for this little guy to finally pop out." She added, stroking her big bump lovingly.
"It's a boy then?" Hermione asked, grinning widely.
"Well, that's what the healers think anyway." Pansy nodded. "And if the size of my stomach is any indication, he will grow up to be as strong and tall as his father." She added, casting a loving gaze over to her husband, who was animatedly discussing his medicinal herb collection with Padma Patil.
Hermione turned back to the colour changing plant and noticed that the flowers closest to Pansy had turned a soft baby blue, mixed with shades of purple and pink.
"So, what does this plant do?" Hermione asked, pointing at the little shrub.
"Oh, we're not quite sure yet." Pansy shrugged. "Luna is convinced that it changes colour according to people's moods and feelings, but Neville hasn't been able to confirm that with a hundred percent certainty yet."
"Ah, like a mood ring." Hermione said, watching more of the delicate blooms turn blue as Pansy stepped closer.
"A what?" the dark-haired witch asked, furrowing her brows with confusion.
Hermione waved her hand dismissively. "Never mind. Just a silly muggle thing." And, pointing at the flowers closest to Pansy, she asked "So what does Luna think your colours mean?"
Pansy's expression turned soft and there was a distinct sparkle in her eyes when she explained "The shades of blue stand for hope and anticipation, like the start of a new beginning. The purple means trust and the pink stands for love, of course. A gentle, unconditional kind of love. The way a mother should love her child." She wrapped her hands gingerly around her big belly and let out a small sigh. "It's shown those colours for me ever since we found out about little man here." She smiled happily down at her bump.
Hermione could feel her throat tighten as she watched the loving gesture. She knew Pansy had struggled a great deal with the way she was brought up and was determined to change her family's traditions and teach her child what it meant to be loved and cared for in a way she never knew.
"You'll be a great mum, Pans." She said huskily, giving the witch's shoulder a gentle squeeze.
Tears began to well up in Pansy's beautiful, dark eyes, causing them to glitter in the soft light of the lanterns, and she let out a slow, steadying breath. "I really hope so." She said with a small, choked-up voice.
Giving Hermione a watery smile she wiped a couple of tears from her cheeks. "Sorry. Hormones…" She sniffled. "Anyway," she cleared her throat noisily. "Your colours are quite interesting too." She added, a knowing smirk spreading on her elegant features.
"What, red and yellow? Seems rather boring." Hermione shrugged, raising a questioning eyebrow at the dark-haired witch.
"Yes. Well, you see…" Pansy explained. "The deep red colour represents love too, but not like my soft, maternal love. It's a much more passionate and fiery affection. The kind of love that makes your toes curl." She fixed Hermione with an intense stare as if trying to tell her something.
Hermione felt uncomfortably hot all of a sudden and shifted awkwardly on the spot, avoiding Pansy's gaze. "Well, that debunks Luna's theory then." She mumbled embarrassedly. "I don't have that kind of love in my life."
"Well, I wouldn't be so sure." Pansy said, biting back a laugh. "You also have those streaks of orange, which stand for uncertainty. And the ugly blotches of mustard yellow, which represent jealousy. All three colours combined could mean that there is potential for that kind of passion in your life, but you're not sure if it's returned yet, which makes you anxious and maybe a little jealous."
Hermione scoffed loudly, a sour expression on her face. "You're starting to sound like Trelawney with her bloody tealeaves." She grumbled darkly. "It's all a pile of rubbish, if you ask me."
"Maybe" Pansy shrugged. "You know how Luna is. She likes to believe in the unbelievable. For all we know it's all a figment of her wild imagination."
"Yeah, probably is." Hermione glowered at the little bush as if it had personally offended her.
Pansy chuckled softly, her eyes glittering with amusement at Hermione's indignation.
"Anyway, I'll go and say hello to Draco and Theo before I leave." She turned around, her dark eyes scanning the hall for the two wizards. "Did you know that they're trying to adopt? With any luck our children will be in the same year at Hogwarts."
"Oh, nice." Hermione said, feeling a slight pang of sadness at the thought that even her childhood-rival had managed to find his happy ever after. She made a mental note to go and congratulate them later, nonetheless. Malfoy had worked very hard on redeeming his past mistakes and she wasn't one to hold a grudge. She was happy for him. She just wished she wasn't the only one left who seemed to have failed miserably at finding love.
Relieved that she wouldn't have to discuss her love life any further she gave dark-haired witch a quick hug. "It was good to see you, Pansy."
"Yeah, you too." Pansy smiled, as she turned to leave. "Oh, and Hermione?" she added, stopping briefly in her tracks. "You should show Potter this plant. I think he'd love it." Her lips drew into a knowing smirk.
"Oh, uhm…" Hermione stammered, ignoring the excited flutter in her stomach. "I don't think Harry's much into plants, Pansy."
"Maybe not." Pansy sing-songed. "But I have a feeling he'd be quite interested in this one." She winked at Hermione conspiratorially, and waddled off, leaving behind an utterly confused and slightly irritated Hermione.
ooo
The evening carried on much the same as it had begun. Hermione continued to catch up with her former classmates, making polite conversation and indulging in fond memories about their time at Hogwarts.
She felt like she must have spoken to at least 40 people so far, all the while keeping an eye out for her friends, and yet, they both proved to be completely illusive.
Granted, she hadn't expected to spend much time with Ron. They weren't on the best of terms, and although they had managed to keep it civil after their break-up, their relationship had since been based on meaningless pleasantries and forced politeness, rather than friendship; Not to mention that he was here with Lavender.
She had, however, been under the impression that at least a certain raven-haired wizard would be here to reminisce about the old times with her. But it was safe to say that her expectations hadn't been met so far.
Harry was avoiding her.
And she was feeling increasingly frustrated about it.
Every time she spotted a glint of his round glasses, or a wisp of his unruly, black hair it disappeared before she could reach him.
It was driving her mad.
She had just seen him again, this time over by the buffet, and had hurried over to meet him. Her thin stiletto heels clicking aggressively against the stone tile floor as she was fighting her way through the small groups of people to where he had stood, - just to arrive there a second later, with him nowhere to be seen.
She silently cursed her poor choice of footwear for slowing her down. Honestly, had she known that this evening would send her on a wild goose-chase after her best friend, she would have worn jeans and trainers, not this ridiculously tight, black dress and the three-inch heels. Who was she trying to impress anyway?
Feeling incredibly agitated, she whirled around to continue her search for the infuriating man, and walked straight into a solid wall of muscle. The forceful impact knocked all the air out of her lungs and she stumbled backwards, nearly losing her balance, when a pair of strong hands grabbed her arms to steady her.
"Woah, sorry, Hermione."
Blinking confusedly, she looked up to see the friendly face of Justin Finch-Fletchley, a brilliant smile on his lips and an amused glint in his eyes. The soft upward curve of his mouth gave his left cheek an adorable dimple, and Hermione found herself staring at it distractedly for a moment.
"Oh, hi, Justin" she breathed, completely taken aback by the sheer proximity of him. He was a mountain of a man.
"Fancy, bumping into you…quite literally." If at all possible, his grin grew even wider, a playful sparkle in his dark eyes.
Pulling herself out of the trance-like state that she had momentarily lost herself in, Hermione rolled her eyes at his play of words and took a step back.
"Yes, I'm sorry about that. I was…" she trailed off, not sure how to explain why she had been stomping around the venue like an angry Erumpent.
"That's alright." Justin interjected quickly. Hermione watched as his eyes travelled shamelessly across her body and stiffened slightly when his gaze lingered just a tiny bit too long atop the low neckline of her dress.
"It's not every day that a beautiful woman walks so willingly into my arms." He added. "You look stunning, Hermione. How have you been?"
Hermione felt an instant flush of heat rush into her cheeks. She wasn't used to receiving such forward compliments from men, and she couldn't quite figure out, whether she was enjoying it, or whether it was making her feel uncomfortable.
"Oh, I've been alright." She gulped nervously, trying to suppress the light tremble in her voice. "You know, keeping busy with work and all that."
"Yes, I heard you just passed new legislation for werewolf rights. Congratulations." He took a step towards her. "You know, I've always admired your intelligence and your drive to turn the world into a better place. But tell me, how do you find the time to make yourself look so beautiful on top of everything that's going on in your head?" They were only inches from each other now and she could feel the heat radiating from his strong, muscular body, as his sparkling eyes bored into hers, a greedy expression on his face.
"Oh, uhm, I don't know." Hermione squeaked. His intense stare was making her feel uncomfortable. She felt incredibly hot and flustered and wasn't sure where to look or how to act. She averted her eyes bashfully, directing them at the space behind him, when her gaze fell upon Harry. The hot, tingling feeling in her stomach was instantly replaced by a frosty chill.
Harry was standing in front of the colour changing bush on the opposite side of the greenhouse, a sour expression on his face as he watched the steamy exchange between her and Justin. The delicate flowers on the shrub behind him had turned that ugly shade of yellow again, mixed with big blotches of a dark, mossy green.
Hermione's brows furrowed as she took in the scene. '…mustard yellow, which represent jealousy.' Pansy's words from earlier rang in her ears as her eyes met with Harry's. His cold, stony expression caused her stomach to clench uncomfortably and she bit her lip in contemplation, wondering what to do next.
Deciding that she had chased after him for long enough and feeling rather spiteful, she turned her attention back to the man in front of her.
They resumed their conversation and Hermione tried hard to humour Justin's blatant attempts to flirt with her, offering him shy smiles and giggling at his terrible jokes.
But her heart just wasn't in it.
She could feel Harry's gaze rest heavy on her.
The intensity of his glare making it difficult to keep her focus on the tall, handsome man in front of her. Her eyes kept flitting over his shoulder to where Harry was standing, drawn in by his piercing green eyes like a magnet, steeling attention with an unsettling force; until she finally couldn't take it anymore.
Throwing all pretence out of the window, she let out an exasperated gasp and held up a hand to stop Justin's monologue mid-sentence. "I'm sorry, would you excuse me for a second." She cast him an apologetic look, before she dashed off, determined to end this stupid game of tag that her friend seemed to be playing with her.
Harry, who had seen her make her way towards him, turned to leave, but Hermione reacted quickly.
She pulled her wand swiftly from the tight bun at the back of her head, letting her cinnamon curls spill down over her shoulders in the act, and flicked it effortlessly to direct a charm at the tall, trailing vine behind him. The slender plant immediately sprang to life winding its twisting branches across the hall to block his way.
"Why are you avoiding me?" she blurted out, the second she had caught up with him.
Harry flinched at her accusatory tone and slowly turned around, his eyes sparkling angrily.
"Seriously?" He asked, looking incredulously.
"Yes, seriously." Hermione retorted. "I've been trying to speak to you all evening, but you keep running away. What the hell is going on?"
"Oh, I'm sorry." Harry said in mock surprise. "I was under the impression that you didn't want to spend time with me." He said coolly; his face pulled into a bitter frown.
Hermione's eyes widened with shock. "Why would you think that?" She asked nonplussed, completely forgetting to sound annoyed with him.
"Why would I...? Hermione…" Harry began wearily. "I asked you to be my date for tonight and you declined."
Lifting his glasses, he rubbed his eyes gingerly, a worn-out expression on his face. He let out a slow, drawn-out sigh, before meeting her gaze and giving her a searching look. "Are you honestly surprised that I've been avoiding you?"
"You asked me on a date, because you were taking pity on me, Harry." Hermione replied quietly. "I know you meant well, but it made me feel pretty crap about myself."
Harry's jaw dropped, his emerald eyes flooding with disbelief. "You think I asked you on a date, because I felt bad for you?"
"Of course, you did." Hermione huffed, folding her arms in front of her chest. "It's what you do. You can't help it. You always want to make everyone feel better."
"That's not what this is." Harry retorted, shaking his head forcefully.
"Yes, it is, and I don't want it ok?" Hermione said, a light tremble in her voice. Anger was rising in her chest, turning her words harsher than intended. "I don't want your pity, Harry. I don't need you to be a hero for me. You can save that for someone else." she glared at him defiantly, her chest constricting painfully.
Harry stared at her, a mixture of shock and incredulity on his face, and for a brief moment Hermione thought that he looked genuinely hurt. It didn't last very long, however, and his body went rigid as he arranged his normally soft and kind features into a stony expression.
"Fine." He said, a harsh bitterness in his voice. "You know what Hermione? Forget I ever asked." And without another word he turned on his heels and stormed off.
ooo
Hermione stood petrified, as she watched Harry leave.
All she could hear was her own blood rushing in her ears to the thundering beat of her anxious heart. Her mind was racing; trying to make sense of what had just happened. Why was he so angry?
"You know, for someone as intelligent as you, you can be pretty thick sometimes." A painfully familiar voice sounded from behind her, causing her to jump. She turned to look into Ron's soft, baby-blue eyes and let out a small groan.
"Please, Ron." She sniffled. "Not you too. I think I've had enough arguing for one day." She chewed the inside of her cheek, trying to ignore the dull ache in her chest.
She didn't know how much more she could take. This was supposed to be their evening. She had hoped that once they were all back together at Hogwarts, the golden trio would be reunited and she would get to relive their glorious friendship for one last night. She had missed the way they used to be. Inseparable. Always there for each other.
She desperately wanted it back.
But instead, one of her best friends had just stormed off angrily after ignoring her all day, and now the other one had come to gloat.
"I'm not here to start a fight, Hermione." Ron murmured, taking a tentative step towards her. "I want to help."
She scoffed, shooting him a disbelieving glare.
"No, I do!" He reaffirmed. "I know I didn't leave on the best of terms, but I still care about you, a lot."
Hermione let out a bitter laugh. "Sure, you do, Ronald." Her voice was dripping with sarcasm. "You care so much about me that you decided to ignore me for the entire evening." She swallowed hard, feeling her throat constrict uncomfortably. "You have that in common with Harry. He doesn't care either."
"Oh, for Merlin's sake, Hermione!" Ron exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. "Read the bloody signs, will you? Harry cares more about you than anyone else."
His sudden outburst caught her by surprise and she took a step back. Eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights.
Ron's face instantly flooded with regret. "I'm sorry." He murmured, taking a deep, drawn-out breath to calm himself.
Hermione watched as his hand snatched up to rub the back of his neck, an embarrassed grimace on his face. It was a tell-tale sign of how uncomfortable the conversation was making him feel. She had seen him do it so many times before, especially towards the end of their relationship, that the familiarity of it felt like a severe blow to her gut. A painful reminder, that the once so effortless tenderness between them had been replaced by a stiff awkwardness.
"Look…" Ron continued gingerly. "Harry is a good friend. He'd do anything for the people he loves. If he had to choose between his own happiness and yours, he would always choose yours."
He let out a small, humourless laugh. "It's why he never said anything about us. He probably knew that we wouldn't work out, long before either of us did, but he still let us figure it out in our own time. For your sake."
Hermione felt an icy chill run down her spine, causing her whole body to tremble as the meaning of Ron's words began to sink in. They were taunting her, slowly trickling into her brain to nurture a long-suppressed longing. An idea she had not dared to utter, not even in her wildest dreams.
She looked up to meet Ron's eyes, trying to decipher his purposeful expression, willing him to carry on, to confirm it.
And he did.
"The poor sod is madly in love with you, Hermione."
The words had come out in a soft whisper, but the impact of them was cosmic.
Hermione let out a choked gasp. Her whole body felt like it had been dipped into the ice-cold depths of the Great Lake. It froze her lungs, making it impossible to breathe.
Clutching her arms around her waist, she shook her head violently. Now that he had said it out loud, she didn't know if she wanted to hear it. It was a dangerous thought. And she wasn't one to gamble. She refused to get her hopes up.
"I can't think about Harry like that, Ron." she croaked. "I can't risk it."
Her eyes were burning now and she blinked rapidly as the first silent tears began to trickle down her checks.
"I think you already do." Ron sighed. "You have for a long time." He gave her a sad little smile and Hermione's heart shattered.
"Ron, I – "
"No, it's ok." He cut her off quickly. "We weren't right for each other, Hermione. Harry is the better match for you. I can see that now."
Hermione's tears were flowing freely now and she didn't even bother to try and wipe them away.
"I'm scared." The confession tumbled from her lips in a silent whisper. "What if we give it a go and it goes wrong? I've already lost you. I can't lose him too."
Ron's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Is that what you think?" he asked, a sudden darkness flitting across his face.
"Hermione…" He took a step towards her and reached up to her face, lifting her chin with a gentle nudge of his fingers. "You haven't lost me." The sincerity in his eyes made Hermione shiver. "I know we haven't been as close as we used to be, but I'll always be here for you if you need me. You're my best friend."
Hermione let out a small sob as he pulled her into a comforting hug, a heavy weight lifting off her chest. She knew it was a dangerous thing to hope, but maybe, just maybe, their friendship wasn't lost entirely.
"You need to go and talk to him." Ron said after a long moment of silence.
Hermione bit her lip nervously, a new wave of anxiety washing over her as she pulled back to look at Ron. There was something in his expression that seemed to calm her racing heart. Maybe it was the subtle curve of his lips that drew his mouth into a small, encouraging smile; or the gentle warmth radiating from his sparkling blue eyes. Whatever it was it gave Hermione the push she needed.
Gathering all the courage she possessed, she gave him a curt nod. "Ok."
Ron let out a sharp breath. "Thank, Merlin!" he huffed. "Come here you silly witch." He gave her another tight squeeze, his strong, comforting arms wrapped firmly around her.
"For a second there I thought I'd have to hex you to make you see sense." He jested and Hermione let out a choked-up laugh, allowing herself to sink deeper into his embrace.
"I've missed you." She sniffled, drinking in the familiar warmth of his body.
"Yeah, I've missed you too." Ron muttered, placing a soft kiss on the top of her head.
They stood in silence for a while and just enjoyed each other's closeness. Revelling in the warm flames of a re-ignited friendship.
It was Hermione who broke the silence first.
"Right…" she let out a deep sigh, pulling out of Ron's embrace. "I'd better go and find Harry, huh?"
"Yeah, you should." Ron chuckled quietly. "I saw him leave the venue with a bottle of Fire Whisky, and we both know the man can't hold his drink."
Hermione let out a sharp hiss and scrunched up her face with concern. Harry really wasn't a great drinker.
"I'm gonna go and see what Lavender's up to, but I'll see you later, ok?" he offered her a friendly smile and Hermione nodded.
"Yeah, see you later." She replied as she began to make her way towards the exit of the greenhouse, embarking on yet another quest to find Harry.
ooo
As soon as she stepped out of the great glass building and into the cold, autumn air, the soft music and animated chatter from inside died out. The instant silence combined with the damp chill seeping through the thin fabric of her dress and under her skin, reminded her of Dementors and she suppressed a sudden shudder.
She had to fight hard to ignore a new wave of fear that was threatening to wash over her and, wrapping her arms tightly around her waist, she broke into a brisk walk.
She knew where she would find Harry.
Reaching the steep, slippery descent down to the Great Lake, she was forced to slow her pace and fall into a dawdling, unsteady totter. Carefully placing one high-heel clad foot in front of another she made her way to her destination; a gnarly old tree by the shore of the lake. Their tree.
She felt another pang of regret when she thought of all the times they used to spend under the tree as a trio; the lazy Saturday afternoons, all the revising for exams, the conversations and laughter they shared. Being around Harry and Ron used to feel so effortless.
Her heart gave a small jolt when the tree came into her vision and she spotted the raven-haired man sitting underneath it. He didn't look up as she approached and sat down beside him. Unsure of what to say she shot him a nervous glance. He was slightly hunched over, his gaze unfocused, the bottle of fire whisky dangling from one hand. Hermione eyed the bottle suspiciously and let out a relieved sigh. Judging by the amount of whisky that was still left, it didn't look like he'd had much to drink so far.
Clearing her throat nervously she cast her gaze down to her fidgeting hands. "I'm sorry."
The apology came out in a tiny whisper, but she was sure Harry had heard it. She looked up to see him draw his bottom lip between his teeth and let out a deep breath through his nose, before lifting the bottle to his mouth and taking a deep swig of the amber liquid; his eyes still firmly fixed to the floor a few feet in front of him.
"I'm tired Hermione." He said quietly, his voice completely void of emotion. "I'm tired of trying to be your friend."
His words stung and she could feel a big, painful lump form at the back of her throat. Swallowing hard, she nodded. "I know."
Encouraged by another sip of whisky he continued. "I thought that being your friend would be enough, but it's not. I can't be near you and not want you."
He finally raised his head to look at her, a pained, almost desperate expression in his piecing green eyes. "I want you so bad, it's killing me."
His words sent Hermione spiralling. She let out a sharp gasp, her lungs aching with suppressed fear.
"Harry, if we go there, there's no coming back." She said, her voice hoarse and crackly. "I don't want to risk our friendship for –"
"No, Hermione!" he cut her off. "Don't do this." His eyes bored into her, making her shudder. "If you don't feel like that for me then fine! But don't turn me down just for the sake of saving a friendship that's already lost."
A heavy silence fell between them as they stared at each other, chests heaving, and Hermione was sure Harry could hear the relentless thundering of her heart.
Her mind was racing wildly. Trying to sort through the sheer number of emotions that had flooded her very being.
She was scared, terrified even, and doubtful; but there was also a tiny glimmer of hope, gently nudging her, trying to get her attention.
A hope that was exhilarating and petrifying at the same time. Slowly reaching out its tendrils and carefully twisting and coiling itself around her unwanted fear, suffocating her doubt.
"Ok."
The word came out with sharp puff of air. Small and inconspicuous, and yet it held the power to change everything.
"Ok?" Harry eyebrows knitted tightly together, confusion replacing the fierce expression from before.
"Yes, ok." Hermione replied, her voice becoming a bit firmer. Mustering all the courage she possessed, she took the whisky bottle from Harry and placed it carefully on the floor, before pushing herself up and straddling his legs.
Harry gulped audibly "I swear, Hermione. If you're playing with me I –"
"I'm not." She cut in quickly, placing a shaking hand on his cheek. "I don't want to be scared anymore."
Her body was trembling traitorously, but she ignored it as she slowly dipped her head down and brushed her lips against his. She felt as Harry stiffened briefly, before he let out a small gasp and leaned into her kiss.
His lips felt soft and warm, and she could taste the Firewhisky on his breath, the slightly intoxicating heat and subtle sweetness making her yearn for more. Deepening the kiss cautiously, she felt a rush of excitement course through her body as Harry responded with equal vigour. The tip of his tongue gently prying her lips apart, nudging her to grant him further access to the velvety depths her mouth. She obliged, parting her lips just a tiny bit, and let out a small gasp as his teeth caught her bottom lip, biting and nibbling on it with tender care.
Harry's hands began to roam and Hermione felt herself go weak, as she wrapped her arms around his neck in a feeble attempt to steady herself. With their lips still tightly locked she could feel his hands wander from her back downwards, all the way across the firm curve of her backside, before coming to rest on the back of her thighs, gently pulling her closer.
She let her head fall back, heat coiling deep inside her as he began trailing soft kisses along her jaw and down her neck.
"Harry." She gasped, running her fingers through his thick, jet-black hair and scraping his scalp lightly. He let out a low groan in response, his lips travelling further down her neck to her collarbone, where he greedily sucked on the soft, golden skin. Marking her as his.
The sensation sent shivers down her spine and she let herself melt into his touch, rolling her hips greedily as a hot flush of desire shot through her core. She moaned loudly as her centre ground against the firm bulge in Harry's trousers, causing it to grow even harder. She repeated the motion several times, feeling herself grow slick as her hands began to wander, fumbling the buttons of his shirt in a desperate attempt to feel the firm muscles underneath.
"Fuck." Harry hissed, and his hands shot to Hermione's hips to steady her. "Hermione, if you don't stop, you're going to make me come in my pants." He bit out through gritted teeth.
It took all the willpower she possessed, for her to stop. As much as she wanted to give in to lust, right now was not the time.
Panting slightly, she nodded and pushed herself off him. "I'm sorry." She breathed, a light blush creeping into her cheeks as she stood up. She felt embarrassed. It wasn't like her to lose control.
Wobbling slightly on the spot she began straightening her dress and padding down her hair, carefully avoiding Harry's gaze, who pushed himself up in one fluid motion and stood next to her.
"Hey," he said, reaching for her hand to pull her closer, a warm, reassuring expression in his eyes. She let him draw her into a gentle hug, gingerly looking up to him as he tucked a soft strand of chestnut hair behind her ear. "Believe me," he said quietly. "You have no idea how much I would love to take you right here and now," his eyes darkened slightly with lust and he averted his gaze, trying to re-gain his self-control. "But I don't think it would be right."
Sighing deeply, he pressed his lips against hers in a sweet and gentle kiss. "I want to do this right, ok?"
Hermione's heart fluttered, and her lips curved into a shy smile as she nodded in agreement.
"Good." Harry said, his eyes sparkling impishly. "Let me woo you a little first. Charm you with my irresistible looks and clever remarks." His lips curved into a playful smirk and Hermione couldn't suppress a small giggle.
"Ok." She said, a warm tingling sensation spreading through her stomach as she wrapped her arms tightly around his warm, firm torso.
"Right," Harry sighed, placing a soft kiss on Hermione's forehead. "What do you say? Shall we go in and find Ron? There's still light in Hagrid's windows. We can't come all the way to Hogwarts and not visit him. It'll be just like the old times. Well…almost." He winked at her playfully.
Hermione's lips split into a wide, mirthful grin, her heart flooding with warmth and excitement. 'Just like the old times.' It's what she had wanted from tonight, with the slight change that she no longer saw Harry as her friend.
She looked at the dark-haired wizard, her heart nearly bursting with happiness, and nodded. "I would love that." She breathed, bouncing happily up and down, eager to get going.
She turned around to lead the way back to the castle when Harry caught her hand.
"Oh, and Hermione," Harry said, offering her a dashing smile. "I should have told you earlier, but…" He pulled her back towards him until she was close enough for him to whisper into her ear. "You look absolutely stunning tonight."
And with one more soft, lingering kiss, he intertwined his fingers firmly with hers and began leading her back towards the Greenhouse.