So, I've kind of had more inspiration to write this fic rather than Secret Keeper at the moment. Actually, that's a lie, I've written about 5,000 words of bits of chapters… Anyway, I will be updating both fics as regularly as I can.

As always, a huge thank you to Ambush99 for betaing this chapter.

Chapter 4

The cold, pale creatures reached up from the murky water, their dead hands trying to grab him and pull him to their darken, lifeless abode. He backed up, trying to escape them, but they started to crawl out of the water towards him. All he had wanted was a small sip of water to ease his unrelenting thirst. His back hit the plinth in the middle of the tiny, rocky island. There was nowhere to go. There was no escape. He had been left to die here. The pale, dead bodies were crawling out of the dank waters. They were surrounding him. He tried to fight them off but he was weak from weeks of torment and malnutrition. He reached for his wand, but found nothing. The bodies were pulling him now, pulling him towards the murky waters.

"No," he screamed. "No, please help. Please anyone, please help me!"

The water was ice cold, it took his breath away. He struggled against the pale creatures, but he knew it was a losing battle. There were too many of them, they were too strong for his weakened state. He looked up sadly as his world grew slowly darker and he was pulled under the murky depths. He stopped struggling now. He knew he couldn't fight it. They had sent him here to die, and that's what he was doing. As his world grew dark, he closed his eyes and accepted his fate.

Sirius woke with a start, gasping for breath. It was dark, so very dark. Cold sweat covered his shivering body. Pulling his knees up to his chest, he pulled out the wand. "Lumos," he whispered. He watched as the wand flickered and then nothing. Tears began to brim in his eyes. Why couldn't he perform the most basic of spells? Lumos, a spell he'd mastered with hardly a passing thought when he was eleven, now he could barely do. What had they done to him? Was he losing his magic? Was he becoming a squib?

"Lumos," he said again, almost pleading with the wand. "Please, please work. I don't like the dark," he practically sobbed. As if the wand somehow was listening to him, the tip glowed. It wasn't as bright as he was used to but it was light, it freed him from the darkness.

With the faint glow of the wand, he slowly managed to calm himself. "Thank you," he whispered. He let his head fall onto his knees. He knew he had to leave the cupboard, but he didn't want to. He didn't want to face his friends or anyone else for that matter. His head still pounded from last night, or was it from last week? He didn't know anymore. Come on Sirius, he told himself, you've got to get up and go to school. But with each movement causing agonising pain to rip through his body, he didn't know how he'd survive the school day. Maybe if he mentally broke down the day into smaller segments, it would appear more manageable to himself. Clean clothes, he thought as he nervously fingered his damp and sweat soaked clothes. He guessed he could pick some out of the lost property cupboard. Then there was food. He didn't fancy facing the Great Hall, with everyone. With their stares. With their questioning and disapproving looks. He guessed he could go to the kitchens. A place that once was full of joy and adventure as he used to go down there with his friends, laughing and clapping each other on the backs, but now it was just a case of survival.

Ooooo

"Are you sure it was him?" Peter said, almost accusingly.

"Pete, I know what Sirius looks like!" James bit back, as he paced up and down their dorm.

"And he was pissed?" Remus asked, bitterness dripping off each word.

"Yeah, I fucking told you that. He was pissed as a fart! I overheard Dumbledore and McGonagall talking. Dumbledore was under the impression he had been at the pub for the last four bloody days!" James growled, barely looking up.

"But Regulus and Bellatrix said he was dead," Peter cut in.

"Merlin knows. Probably all part of his sick plan. I guess his family were trying to save themselves from embarrassment," James replied, as he stopped pacing and ran a hand through his hair.

"What are we going to do?" Remus asked.

"I don't know about you, but I never want to be associated with him again. He's bloody messed up. First, he betrays you to Snape of all people and then betrays us by making us believe he's dead. I'm bloody done with him!" James spat.

Remus nodded. "Me too. Pete?"

"Why would I want to hang out with a lying, traitorous bastard?"

"What are we going to do when he's in the dorm or in lessons?"

"That," James said holding his hands up. "That I don't know mate."

"Shall we head to breakfast?" Remus said tiredly. After James' revelation last night, none of them had slept well. He had barely slept at all. Too angry. Too confused to work out what to do.

"Sure," James said, nodding. "The day of doom, double History of Magic!"

"Well, at least we can catch up on some sleep," Peter said, yawning.

James laughed. "Yeah," he said, swinging an arm around Pete's shoulders. "Yeah, we can do that. I can't wait for breakfast."

Meanwhile, Sirius sat, slightly curled up in the broom cupboard, carefully nibbling at a dry piece of toast. He didn't trust his body to stomach anything else. He closed his eyes again as his vision swam. He knew he needed more food than he was eating, but he couldn't risk throwing up what little nutrients he had left in his body. Despite the clean, dry clothes, he was still shivering. Why couldn't he get warm?

He was looking at the upcoming day with dread. But the small mercy was the double period of History of Magic, followed by Potions. Originally he hated those lessons, but it gave him time to rest his broken, exhausted body, and in Potions he could nick some ingredients to make a painkiller. He didn't think he could get through another day if he didn't, he questioned if he'd even survive this day. But he had to. Come on Sirius, he thought to himself, come on, get up. You need to do it for the Marauders, for Regulus and for Muggle-borns. The dark cloud of war was rapidly descending on them and he could shift it for a moment, just a moment, and help the people he loved. Slowly, and with great effort, he forced himself to stand. He took a moment to listen for movement outside. He couldn't be caught. If someone caught him staggering out of the cupboard, questions would be asked and then, well, it didn't even bear thinking about.

"Oh, little cousin has made an appearance."

Sirius froze halfway down the corridor. "Bella, I don't want any trouble," he replied calmly.

"Oh but I know you do, otherwise you wouldn't have done what you did," Bellatrix said playfully, as she twirled her wand between her fingers.

"No, Bella, I just want to get to class," Sirius replied, forcing himself to stare her in the eyes. He needed to act defiant. He needed to act fearless.

"Deal with him," Bellatrix said dismissively, her head nodding towards two burly seventh years to her left.

"Bella, what are you doing?" Sirius replied, trying to sound bored, but he knew he was probably failing. What chance did he have? Ten against one. No one was going to help him. No one wanted to stand up to his deranged cousin. He tried to fight against the two burly seventh years, but to no avail. They roughly grabbed him, pinning him against the wall. When he was fully fit, he might have had a chance, but not now. "What do you want?" he hissed.

"You were given such an honorable task, but yet, I feel you feel disgusted," Bella sneered, running her wand down Sirius' cheek. "Search him," she hissed.

Sirius tried not to wince as he was slammed against a wall again and roughly searched. "What are you looking for, you freak!" he spat.

"He only has this old wand," one of the burly seventh years grunted.

"Oh, a wand," Bellatrix replied lightly, taking the wand between her fingers and examining it. "This isn't yours, is it? No, it's not the Noble Wand of Black. But you never deserved it. You could never live up to its honorable and noble power, you filthy blood traitor. Rough him up, but don't touch the face. We don't need any questions!"

"Yes ma'am. Should we use a wand?"

"No," Bellatrix said shaking her hand. "It will leave too many traces. Beat him like the mudbloods he so loves."

Sirius concentrated on his cousin's face as the fists and feet began to fly. Be defiant, he told himself. Don't let them win. Pain consumed his body, his vision darkened but he couldn't pass out. He couldn't let them win. He hoped they would get bored and leave him, as he didn't know how much he could take.

"Get him up," Bellatrix sneered, looking down at her cousin in disgust. "Here," she said, thrusting the wand into his hand. "Perform some magic."

"What?" Sirius replied breathlessly, biting back the pain.

"You heard me!" Bellatrix spat, leaning in, so her face was touching her cousin's. "Perform some magic. Come on little cousin, hex me."

Sirius looked around him. Ten against one. He wasn't going to get out of this in one piece. He didn't trust his magic at the moment. He could barely perform 'Lumos' so what chance did he have? They were staring at him. They were waiting for him to act. "Flipendo," he muttered, pointing the wand at his cousin. It wasn't a powerful jinx. He knew he used to be able to perform it, but he doubted he could do it anymore. He watched with choked disbelief as the wand flickered and died.

"Ha!" Bellatrix laughed, tapping Sirius' face mockingly with her wand. "Little Sirius can't perform magic. Little Sirius is turning into a squib." The others laughed with her, pointing and jeering. "Let's leave the dirty squib. He's pathetic and worthless to us. He's not worth our time. He's an oxygen thief. I guess you wish you had died out there, squib."

He watched them disappear down the corridor, before he slipped down the wall and collapsed. His world darkened and he embraced it. He didn't know how long he had been lying there, when he finally came to his senses. The latest beating had drained him of his strength. He knew he had to get up and go to his classes or he would be expelled for sure, but how, he did not know.

"Sorry Professor," he muttered, when he eventually made it into Professor Binns' class. He looked down, avoiding eye contact with his fellow classmates, especially James. No doubt they'd heard and believed the rumours that had been spun. He never wanted to hurt anyone, least of all the Marauders, but what choice did he have? He watched as various people, including the Marauders, moved their bags onto chairs, preventing him from sitting there. Finding a desk at the back of the class he dropped his bag and tried to listen. As Professor Binns droned on, his eyelids grew heavy.

"Oi, Black! Lesson's finished."

Sirius woke with a start. Cold sweat ran down his back. He looked around, the classroom was empty. "Thanks," he managed to mutter. Potions, he thought, he had to get to Potions. Unlike Binns, Slughorn would notice if he was late. With great effort he pulled himself to his feet and dragged himself to Potions.

Potions, he thought, was going from bad to worse. He had drifted off at the start of the lesson, missed Slughorn's question and couldn't answer. At some point, he had lost points for Gryffindor, for what reason he could not remember, and now he was watching his cauldron melt before his eyes.

"Mr. Black, were you not paying attention when I said a teaspoon of crushed beetles!"

Sirius looked to see a blurry and somewhat angry looking Slughorn standing in front of him. He had remembered reading it and he had intended to follow the instructions, but his hands had been shaking so much, he had dumped the whole pot in. What could he say? He couldn't very well tell the truth - 'I'm sorry Professor, I didn't intend to. It's just I barely slept last night. It feels as though I'm continuously being stabbed, I'm freezing and there's currently two of you'. No, he thought, he had to pretend he did intend it. "I must have missed it," he managed with a slight smile.

"Do you know how dangerous that could be?!" Slughorn practically spat.

Sirius shrugged, the stupid smile still fixed on his face.

"Ten points from Gryffindor, and clean up this mess, Black!" Slughorn growled, before he stalked back to his desk. "The rest of you, good work, and I'll see you after the weekend."

Sirius kept his head down, avoiding eye contact, as he cleared up the melted remains of his cauldron. Something knocked his arm. He felt his breath catch in his throat, as he looked wildly around, searching for the threat.

"Oh, that's really decent of you. There's us mourning you, but you were just getting pissed in the pub. That's what you are continuing to do every night. You would have thought you'd have the decency not to lose Gryffindor any more points, but it's you, so why I am surprised!" James spat, looking down at his former friend.

"James, I'm-" Sirius started.

"Save it Sirius, I'm done with your shit!" James sneered, before, without another word, he turned on his heel and stormed out of the classroom.

Sirius watched his friend storm out of the room, before he sank down on the bench and rested his head on the desk. "I'm sorry, James," he whispered to the empty room. "I don't want to lose Gryffindor any points, really I don't, but I can't help it. I know you hate me but it's better this way. If we're not friends, they might not come after you, because I don't know how much longer I can protect you."

He glanced at his watch; it was time for lunch. He had no intention of going to the Great Hall. He didn't want to deal with stares and whispers, he just wanted to curl up and wish himself into a different life. By the time he'd finished cleaning up his potions mess, he practically crawled back to the broom cupboard. He nibbled on the dry piece of toast, still not trusting his body not to reject anything more adventurous. He could feel his eyelids growing heavy. He tried to fight it, not wanting to visit the land of his nightmares again.

When he opened his eyes again, the castle seemed dark and quiet. "Lumos," he said weakly. He blinked several times as he tried to focus on his watch. 7 o'clock. Shit, he thought, how the hell had he slept through the afternoon? He had missed Divination and Care of Magical Creatures. Divination he didn't much care for, but he loved Care of Magical Creatures. He ran a tired hand through his dishevelled and limp hair. He wondered how many more points he had lost Gryffindor and how many more detentions he had racked up. He closed his eyes and shivered. He could feel the magic draining from him. He could feel his very life slipping from his body. He wondered how much longer he could go on.

"Expecto patronum," he said weakly. He vaguely watched as the wand jerked and died. He felt his eyes grow heavy again as he felt himself slipping away.