A big thank you to Ambush99 for her amazing betaing skills

Chapter 10

Three days, it had been three bloody days since he had seen Sirius, and quite frankly he had had enough. Surely Madam Pomfrey had healed him by now?! What was so wrong with Sirius that he couldn't have visitors for three days?! His request had always been met with the same response, 'I'm sorry James, Sirius isn't well enough for visitors at the moment'. But enough was enough. Sirius was his best friend. No, he was more than that, Sirius was his brother and he needed to be there for him. He looked around the dorm, both Pete and Remus were fast asleep. He had barely slept since Sirius' accidental magic incident. The whole incident had terrified him, knowing what his brother had gone through alone. Knowing how close his brother had been to death and he had stood idly by. But that was going to end now, he thought as he pulled his cloak and the map from his trunk. With a quick glance at the map, he pulled on the cloak and gently padded out of the dorm.

The castle was quiet and deserted at this time of night. He pulled his cloak closer to his body as the cold draft from the corridor bit into him. He wondered how he hadn't seen it before. It was undoubtedly not the first time Sirius' parents had hurt him, just the first time they had tried to kill him. Why hadn't Sirius trusted him enough to tell him what was really going on at home? When Sirius had said he hated his family, he'd just figured they had argued, it had never entered his mind they were hurting him.

"That's it my dear, we'll find any nasty students out of bed."

James froze. He had been so lost in thought he'd paid no attention to his surroundings. Quickly pulling himself into an empty classroom, he held his breath as Filch passed. He exhaled slowly once the coast was clear and pulled out the map. How had he been so stupid? What use would he be to Sirius if he was spending every evening in detention? He studied the map carefully before emerging from his hiding spot. He quietly slipped into the hospital wing, pausing for a moment to look to consult the map again. Sirius hadn't moved from his spot at the far end of the wing. The healers were with him again. What they were doing, James did not know, but it shouldn't take them over three days to heal his friend. Madam Pomfrey healed Remus' wounds after a transformation in a matter of hours, so why were they taking so long to heal Sirius?

With the cloak on, he slipped into the room unnoticed. He thought he had prepared himself, but he hadn't. Sirius was paler than he had been in the classroom. He could barely see his chest moving. His hair was lank and lifeless, his face sunken and gaunt. He barely seemed alive. What the hell had the healers been doing for the last three days?! He could see a long scar running along Sirius' shoulder, which looked like someone had hastily sewn it together like a torn coat. What the hell were they doing? Sirius wasn't a piece of material or something. Why hadn't they used magic? His wrist still looked swollen and bruised with another long, livid looking scar running down his arm which, again, looked hastily sewn together. There was another weird looking, thin cut wrapping around his hand. He watched in horror as the healers muttered something he couldn't make out, before re-bandaging and leaving. He stood there, rooted to the spot, unable to react. Madam Pomfrey's words came back to him. Were they just trying to hide these horrors from him? Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he found the courage to approach his friend.

"Hey mate," he said softly, pulling off the cloak as he went. "Umm, so." He stopped, unable to find any words. He looked at his friend again. At the deathly pale skin. At the chest that barely seemed to move. He noticed for the first time the clear tube which seemed to be stuck into Sirius' hand. The whole thing reminded him of one of those muggle horror books Pete would read. Frankenstein? "Mate," he whispered. "What have they done to you?" His hand hovered over Sirius', scared to touch him in case he damaged something. Swallowing hard he sat down and gently laid his hand on Sirius'. It felt cold and unresponsive. Even Remus after a particularly bad transformation felt as though he had more life in him than Sirius did right now. "So," he started, and stopped again. Come on James, pull yourself together, this is Sirius, your brother! He needs you, he doesn't need some pathetic wimp. He needs someone strong to stand by him and protect him until he's able to do so himself.

He took off his glasses and rubbed his face. "Okay mate, the chicks are going to dig those scars but the whole thin vampire look you've got going on really isn't a good look. I would say you could brag about wrestling a werewolf but, well, you do and it's probably a little insensitive to Moony." James stopped and sighed again. "Fuck mate, this is really hard having this one way conversation with you. Sure, maybe with Moony when he's engrossed in a book or something. Or Pete when he's attempting to write an essay or something, but not with you. We clicked from the moment we met. We finish each other's sentences. We could talk to each other about anything-" He paused again, and raked a hand through his dishevelled hair. "Well that's bullshit, isn't it mate. I thought we didn't have any secrets between us, but we do, don't we? I don't understand why you didn't tell me what was really happening at home, but I'm sure you had your reasons. But me?! Why didn't I talk to you after the whole incident? Everyone says it's not my fault you got hurt, but I tend not to believe them. At the very least I should've had your back when you returned, and I didn't. It would have taken one moment to stop and think and realise you weren't drunk, but hurt. Yes, I may not have been able to stop you from getting hurt, but at least I could have got you some help earlier. That was unforgivable and for that I'm so sorry." He paused and eyed his motionless friend for a moment. "You've got to wake up, okay. Whatever they did, whatever they threatened you with, we can protect you. I promise you, I'll protect you. Please Padfoot, you need to be okay." Placing his glasses carefully on the bedside table, he laid his head down on the bed. "Sirius, I'm so sorry. I should have been here before now. I could sell you crap about the teachers saying I couldn't see you before now, but when did that stop us before?" He laid his head against his friend's neck. "Just concentrate on getting better, that's all you need to do. Get better and we'll do the rest." He felt his eyes grow heavy, as he rested his head next to Sirius' shoulder. "I'm not going to leave you, Padfoot. She'll probably kick me out to go to lessons, but I'll be back. I'll stay tonight because, well, I want to, plus I had a bit of a close encounter with Filch earlier and I don't reckon my luck will hold a second time around. Oh and Pete's snoring again. So, it's much easier if I stay here. Well, goodnight Padfoot."

He didn't know what had woken him, or what time it was, but a gentle moonlight shimmered through the window. He rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands and fumbled for his glasses. He exhaled slowly as he watched his friend. He was still alive, that's about all he could say about his friend's condition. "Waning gibbous," he said quietly as he caught sight of the moon. "Well Padfoot, at least Moony has got a break before the next moon. I forgot to tell you about it, didn't I." He stopped and rubbed his face for a moment. "It was a pretty tough moon to be honest, but we managed to stop the wolf from hurting itself. I don't think I've ever appreciated how scared Pete is of the wolf until now. Hell, I am. I know Remus is in there somewhere but it still scares me, and the whole transformation is brutal. But last time Pete spent the whole time hiding in some hole, not that I blame him. I mean, what use is a rat against a werewolf? I guess he didn't trust my ability to handle the wolf. I don't think I've appreciated how much you do on moon nights. It was something Pete said, that you were stronger and tougher than anyone gave you credit for, as you take on the wolf. You bloody fight a werewolf once a month mate! That's why I know you'll be alright, but you have to fight, you can't let those bastards win. We need you, Padfoot. I know we abandoned you and we were wrong to do so, but we are not going to make that mistake again."

James frowned and sat back for a moment. He swore he saw Sirius' eyelids flicker. "Sirius?" he whispered, gently laying a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Mate, it's okay. You're okay. You're safe." His brow creased further as Sirius didn't respond, but started to shake. Nightmare, James thought as he sat on the bed and gently shook his friend. "Padfoot, you've got to wake up. It's okay. You're having a nightmare but it's not real. You're at Hogwarts. I know you probably feel like crap right now but you're going to be okay and you never have to see your parents again. I promise you, no one will make you ever go back there."

Sirius felt as though he was swimming through a sea of treacle surrounded by fog. The cruel voices taunted him. Cold, dead arms tried to grab his legs and pull him under. He was so tired, he wondered if it was worth fighting anymore. He didn't know if he could fight anymore. He could hear another voice, it was different to the others. He knew it, but couldn't place it. It sounded urgent and frightened. He tried to push through the fog to make a connection. "Fuck off out of my life". "Just crawl back into that hole you came from and die". James, he finally managed. He knew his friend hated him and he had good reason to, but he still had to protect him from them. If James was here, that meant they had captured him. If they had caught James, who else had they captured? He tried opening his eyes but they felt unbelievably heavy. He wondered if he could do anything to protect James in his current condition.

"Come on Sirius, you can do this," James whispered desperately as he watched his friend struggling to open his eyes.

He was met with blurred swirls of colour. He tried lifting his hand to his eyes, but it felt as though it was weighed down with a four stone weight. He blinked several times as his vision slowly came into focus. "James?" he said in a hoarse voice he didn't recognise as his own.

"Yeah mate. You okay?" James replied grinning.

"What, what are you doing here?" Sirius managed, swallowing several times.

James frowned. "I had a close call with Filch but other than that."

"No, why are you here?"

"Why wouldn't I be here? Sirius, you're my best friend. I stupidly listened to Madam Pomfrey and stayed away, but since when have I listened to something like that?"

"But you hate me."

"What?"

"You told me to fuck off out of your life," Sirius replied, his voice barely more than a whisper.

James sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. "Sirius, what is the last thing you remember?"

"I, I don't know. Bits, it doesn't make sense."

"Okay," James said sitting on the chair, leaning towards his friend. "You told Moony and I what happened. We know you didn't mean to tell Snape about the tree. We've all forgiven you."

"I don't-"

"I'm not surprised, you were pretty out of it."

"Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital wing at school."

"No, no I can't," Sirius said in a whispered panic, as he made a weak attempt to get up.

"Sirius, we didn't have a choice, you were dying," James replied, resting a gentle hand on his friend's shoulder.

"But, they will-"

"Mate, the only people who know you are here are Flitwick, McGonagall, Dumbledore, a couple of healers from St. Mungo's, Moony, Pete and me. That's all."

"But they-" Sirius started, his body trembling.

"Your parents do not know and they cannot get to you here. You are safe here. We are not going to let anything happen to you, I promise."

Sirius swallowed a couple of times, as he tried to make sense of what had happened. When had he spoken to James and Moony? What had he told them? James mentioned his parents, had he told James? He felt his eyes growing heavy again. He couldn't let them know what was happening. He knew his parents wouldn't hesitate to carry out their threats. He would have to leave Hogwarts and hide somewhere. Maybe in Muggle London, his parents would never look for him there.

"That's it mate, just rest. We'll sort everything out, I promise. Everything is going to be okay. You just concentrate on getting yourself better, that's all you need to do," James said gently as he watched his friend give in to the battle and fall asleep.