Chapter 9.5: What will I sacrifice? Part 1 (Growing Pains)

Saturday, September 12, 2015

Unit-03 was flown in from the United States while we were at school. As it turned out, today, the very day before Kensuke was to have his activation test with it, was also his birthday. The day he turns 14 might also be the last day he spends as a normal kid. If God exists, he's got a twisted sense of humor.

Kensuke brought his birthday up during lunch. I was so occupied by sync training with Asuka that I hadn't even thought to buy him a present or anything. I felt really bad about it, but he understood our limiting circumstances and considered us stopping the Angel and making this day possible for him in the first place as our gift. His dad must've agreed, because the two of them wanted to invite Rei, Asuka, and I to dinner with them and Touji at an Italian restaurant called Giordano's later tonight. Not just to give us their thanks, but also so Kensuke could celebrate with more of his friends. Rei couldn't come, since Father needed her to stay at HQ late for other business, but Asuka was surprisingly eager to join us.

After daily training at Nerv HQ and the exchange of a phone call or two, Misato drove Asuka and I to meet Touji, Kensuke, and Kensuke's dad at the restaurant at about 7:30 PM. Mr. Aida works as an engineer at Nerv. He helps design equipment for the Evas, though the specific gear he's assigned with is a secret. He's very friendly and pleasant to talk to, …though he mistakenly thought Asuka was my girlfriend and not Rei, and the other guys and I had to correct him. He also told me he wished there were more good people like me in the world. I think his praise was a little high, but if what I do helps him and Kensuke, then I guess I can't complain. Other things we talked about included our training for Israfel and the activation test tomorrow. However the activation goes, it looks like Kensuke and his dad have already chosen to accept what happens. At this point, if they can, I probably should too.

The dinner and the cake afterwards were good, and we told Misato all about it as we drove back home. Asuka spoke like she enjoyed herself, but as I glanced at her, something was off. It was like her smile wasn't reaching her eyes all the way. I don't know if she's upset about something or what, but nothing's stopping her from talking to either of us about it. We can't heal her if we don't know what's hurting her.

Sunday, September 13, 2015

We didn't have to come to HQ until later this afternoon for the activation test, so we pilots got most of the day to ourselves. Asuka decided to go shopping for swimsuits with Kaji for the upcoming school field trip to Okinawa. Rei, for her part, decided to spend the day with Misato and I. She watched me play Ys for a bit before Misato asked why she wore her school uniform all the time, even on days when we didn't have school. Rei answered that she had nothing else to wear, not even any pajamas. This led to us going on a shopping spree of our own to buy her some new clothes. As it turns out, her tastes are about as modest (would "basic" be a better word?) as mine, to the point where we had to verify she was making her choices because she genuinely liked them herself and not just because us or Father would like them. By chance, we also ran into Asuka and Kaji as we were leaving the shopping mall. Contrary to what we expected, Misato asked me to watch Asuka and Rei as she and Kaji went into another store to briefly talk about something. What it could've been was beyond me.

"Fancy meeting you here, Misato!" greeted Kaji as she dragged him to an obscure corner of the GU in the mall. "Wasn't expecting you to be so rough with me, but considering our past, I probably should have. Guess I should be trusting your lips after all…"

"Grrr, save it! This is serious business I need to discuss with you."

"Go on. I'm listening. As a friend, you can tell me anything that's on your mind. But be mindful of who else might hear you."

Misato crept to his ear to whisper to him. "Shinji, Asuka, Rei, and now Kensuke. Their birth mothers are dead, all four of them. Doesn't that strike you as at least a little suspicious?"

Kaji's expression grew more grave. "So I'm not the only one who thinks that," he whispered back.

"What do you know about the selection process?"

"Very little if anything. But I intend to learn for myself. And if I dig something up, you'll be among the first to hear it. That's a privilege I grant only a select few."

"…Thank you, Kaji. If nothing else, I know I can count on you." Misato had to check herself lest she show too much excitement that he shared her feelings.

On the way back home, we also made a trip to the grocery store; Rei wanted me to teach her how to make the stir fry from the night she first visited us. We actually got enough of the necessary ingredients for six people rather than four. I didn't get why at first, until we attended Unit-03's activation test.

Surely enough, the activation test went off without a hitch, and Kensuke officially became the Fourth Child. His sync rate finished at only 26.1%, but Dr. Akagi says it's expected to get better as he trains in Unit-03 and grows more accustomed to it. However, just as I did, he'll need to set aside some time to study the Eva resource map before he begins basic training in a few days. Which is where Misato came in.

"WHAAAAAT?! We can't go on the trip?!"

"That's right. Sorry to say, but it can't be helped."

"N-no fair!" Kensuke shot back. "C-can't you make an exception for me? Pretty please?" He'd finally been chosen as a pilot, but this didn't change the fact that he'd been dying to go on the field trip since the school year started. All the sights of Okinawa, from historic ruins to natural landmarks to marine life were begging him to capture them on film. But now they were out of his reach until God knows when.

"I know the both of you have been looking forward to this, but your duties as pilots take priority. Especially yours, Kensuke. There may come a time when we need to deploy all four Evas at once, so it's vitally important that you be ready for action in the event we need you."

Kensuke looked down in defeat and sighed. "I understand, Captain." Upset as he was, he wasn't stupid, and he was painfully aware he couldn't fight back at this no matter how hard he tried.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not taking this lying down!" Asuka shouted as she stood up and slammed her hands on the table. She paused for a moment as she struggled for her next words. "Hey, Shinji! You're a man, aren't you? Put down that tea and say something!"

Shinji did say something, but not what she was hoping for. "Actually, I agree with Misato. Protecting everyone from the Angels takes priority over the trip."

"I concur with Shinji and Kensuke," Rei added. "I will do whatever is necessary to ensure the success of our mission."

What a disappointment, Asuka thought to herself. At least Kensuke tried to talk her out of it, if only a little. Shinji couldn't even be asked to do that. "You guys are pathetic! And here I thought men were supposed to have balls!"

"Only idiots fight when they know they can't win. Balls have nothing to do with it," Kensuke cooly deflected.

"Look, why can't we just take the fight to the Angels? Why do we have to keep staying on standby like this? Always ready to defend against an enemy who might not even show up! Why can't we take the fight to them for once?"

"If we were capable of that, we would've already done so. …Okay. Look on the bright side. While the rest of your class is on the trip, the two of you can catch up on your studies. Or did you think I wouldn't know about these?" Misato handed Shinji and Asuka printouts of their less than flattering report cards. "If so, I'm afraid you're mistaken. Your test scores at school are sent straight to me."

Asuka glanced at Shinji's report card long enough to become aghast at the idea of herself having not only a worse love life, but worse grades too. "Y-you think this means anything to me?! Why should I care about Japan's outdated grading system?"

"In Rome, do as the Romans do. You could at least try to adjust to Japanese school life."

"Arrrgh! This sucks!"

"You know, Asuka, if you and Shinji need help studying, Ken would be glad to pitch in!" Mr. Aida offered, seizing a precious opportunity to get a word into the conversation. "His grades are good all around, but especially so in science!"

"Save it! I don't need help from anyone!"

Asuka stormed out of the room in a fit of rage. Kensuke got up to pursue her, telling her to wait up. Shinji almost got up too before Misato stopped him.

"Leave her be, Shinji. If she can't get over this, then that's her problem and not yours."

After the test ended, Misato used her authority as Operations Director to have Mr. Aida and all of us pilots come back with her to our apartment to discuss what we'd be doing this week. Unfortunately, but predictably, all of us were blocked from going on the field trip because we had to stay behind in the event of an Angel attack. Asuka and Kensuke were pretty upset about that; Kensuke quickly got over it once he understood why we were being kept in Tokyo-3, but the same couldn't be said about Asuka. It only got worse when Misato showed us our report cards, not long after which Asuka stormed off to sulk in her room.

We didn't have a lot else to talk about afterwards, but the Aidas decided to stay for dinner when Misato suggested they do so. After Kensuke managed to calm Asuka somehow, they played Vib-Ribbon 2 while Misato and Mr. Aida made small talk and I helped Rei cook. The food was tasty, but Rei was feeling a bit down afterwards because she didn't feel like it was as good as mine. Asuka saying she wasn't impressed by it didn't help. That said, even if it could've been better, it was still a fine job for someone who'd never cooked before. She just needs to practice some more; heck, I only got as good as I am at things like cooking and playing the cello because of all the time I spent practicing and learning from my mistakes. After the Aidas left, I consoled Rei and gave her cooking advice as best I could before she left too.

Tomorrow, Asuka's going to finish moving into Rei's apartment and will no longer be living with Misato and I. I expect she'll be fine, but knowing how Asuka can be a bit of a handful sometimes, I just… I dunno. Rei and I need each other and it hurts that I can't always be there for her. Once again I can only hope things turn out alright, whatever happens.

Asuka was now as close to her old home in Germany as she could feasibly get in Japan. All the stuff she had to keep in storage while living with Misato was now free for her to use in this new place. About a week ago she would've been satisfied by this arrangement. But within that time period, something unexpected happened. She found in Shinji someone who could legitimately empathize with her and help her actually sleep soundly at night. And he'd been torn away from her almost as soon as she'd gotten her arms around him.

To make matters worse, she now had a different roommate to deal with. Although she saw all of the other pilots as competition, Rei was the only one she flat-out disliked. Commander Ikari making Rei live in the Cemetery was abhorrent, but that didn't invalidate the jealousy Asuka felt towards her for getting the lion's share of Shinji's attention. Rei was easily a worse pilot than her, but could at minimum match her in other places. She was soft-spoken and didn't tend to argue. She had natural talents in both gaming and cooking despite being relatively inexperienced in either. And both Rei and Shinji had the nicest asses Asuka had ever seen, if what she saw of them in their plugsuits wasn't misleading her. It was easy to see how those two could've fallen for each other.

Throughout the entire first night in Rei's apartment, Asuka's thoughts were fixated on Shinji and wanting to be near him. At first she tried passing the time by studying, per Misato's suggestion, but found herself struggling to concentrate. She then tried playing Mega Man Zero on her Game Boy Advance instead, only to have a hard time getting appropriately in the zone for such a thing. She was at a loss as to how to keep herself occupied and looked around for something else to do. Her gaze encountered Rei reading a green book, probably the one she was always so absorbed in at school when she wasn't in class or hanging around the Stooges.

"Hmph. Whatcha reading~?" probed Asuka. Maybe she could take this time to get some more insight into Rei's thinking.

"It is a biology book. I am specifically reading about cloning," said Rei in her typical terse fashion.

"Cloning, huh? Heh. You sure that's not too advanced for you?"

"I can understand it adequately."

"Is that so? …Come to think of it, why are you spending your free time reading something like this? It's not normal for girls our age!"

"Not normal? What is normal?"

What kind of question is that? Asuka wondered at first. But then she remembered she was dealing with Rei. "Well… Normally we watch TV, listen to music, talk about cute guys, …read books that aren't about boring science stuff…"

"This book is not boring."

"Oh, yeah? Lemme see it then!" Asuka moved behind Rei, and her eyes wanted to pop out of her skull upon discovering that Rei was reading in her own mother tongue. "D-du sprichst Deutsch?! (Y-you understand German?!)"

"Ja. Mir wurde die deutsche Sprache beigebracht nachdem du als das Zweite Kind auserkoren wurdest, nur für den Fall dass du die japanische Sprache nicht erlernen kannst. (Yes. I was taught German after you had been chosen as the Second Child, to use in the event you were unable to learn Japanese.)"

"Du warst die ganze Zeit fähig, dich mit mir auf Deutsch zu unterhalten und hast nie auch nur daran gedacht, das auch zu tun? (You knew German this whole time and didn't even think to speak to me in it?)"

"Dein Japanisch ist zur Kommunikation ausreichend. Ich habe keine Notwendigkeit erkannt, dich auf Deutsch anzusprechen. (You speak Japanese well enough to communicate. I did not observe a need to address you in German.)"

Yet another surprise. Rei had something to offer her after all. What was she supposed to say now? She recalled the Golden Rule Shinji brought up on Over the Rainbow:

"Treat others the way you want to be treated."

As far as Asuka knew, Shinji couldn't speak German and Kensuke probably couldn't either. Although Shinji was willing to protect her at night, she could tell Rei things in German that she might not be able to tell anyone else in Japanese, lest they overhear. Much as she hated to admit it, she needed to behave with less hostility towards her archrival for the time being. At this point, she decided to cut off the conversation and get ready for bed. She'd have plenty of time to ponder her next moves as she fell asleep.

AUTHOR'S NOTES:

Sorry again for the unusually long wait for a relatively minor chapter. Christmas vacation didn't exactly give me a lot of time to write. Not a lot else to say besides that, except perhaps that the next chapter (Magma Diver) is going to be a real doozy.

Special thanks to Evageeks for help with canon fact-checking (including timeline planning), and to my pre-readers Argent and Spider for examining the chapters released so far. Please check out their works (specifically A Strange Duet and The Moment Yuuko Found Out) if you can. The former is another Evangelion (AsuShin) fic, while the latter is a Nichijou fic. Also special thanks to my acquaintance Hermän2000 for the German translations of Asuka and Rei's dialogue near the end.