So as I may carry the weight
All the doubt
I had in me has been allayed
So from now till the day that
I'm carried away
I will never walk around what stands in my way
Fuck if they ain't letting up, because neither will I
When I die from the ashes an eagle will rise
As long as my blade and my faith will keep me alive
Fear ain't something that you'll see in my eyes
Noel looked back at his room and tried to decide what else he would ever need for the event. His suit had already been delivered, all clean and freshly pressed. He was supposed to look fabulous even if he didn't feel it, nowhere near.
But it was pretty much a handicraft by any means. Old but rarely worn therefore still as new. Maybe not particularly fit for wheelchair but it was the only thing aside official Federation uniform. The brochure told event was formal but not obligatory uniformed so he had exactly two choices in clothing. One was fleet assigned uniform for formal events and other was his own formal choice which meant this particular piece of art.
In color indescribable and deep that vaguely made him feel as if he had been donned in the sky and water. Which was odd combination though the only one he could come up as a comparison.
Almost made him feel alive, which he of course was, but in a way alive on the inside. Which was a welcomed feeling since everyone knew their badass Lt. Allison was somewhat dead inside for a long time. Not that he'd made any remark on that opinion.
So he was staring at the beautiful creation, he knew was tailored to fit perfectly even if he didn't sport neither extra meat nor extra skeleton since the last time he wore it, and felt that tingle already starting to nibble at his senses.
Luckily his earlier medical issues got sorted out with some help from meds that he finally dig out from his long awaited suitcase, and his officially assigned assistant-slash-guide who was little too much excited about the chance to shine in the Gala and tried to dump his grumpy ass in the vibrating cheer.
To add his already waning patience he got two of them. Girl about age he could guess near adulthood and a boy who seemed in his teens. They were siblings and topping the cake some alien race that once came to the planet much like Earthlings as everyone seemed to call those coming from Earth in the latest rescue mission.
Luckily he always hid the fact he was one too. Some of locals liked to think Earth folk lower class and closer to slaves than actual people.
Other part liked to think these humans were like pets or antiques that wanted to be collected.
For himself he tried to avoid anything that called his opinion on those topics and he never involved himself into this judgmental party. While Federation was fully aware of his whereabouts and they accepted him as most of Federation consisted of Earth-descendants they didn't openly pointed at anyone for who they were and where came from.
So that wasn't neither secret nor billboard.
Shaking his jumbled head Noel sighed and reached for his suit. It felt as if full of electricity and life as his skin touched it and that made his sensitive nerves send tickle all the way through his body making the tiny jolts travel to all the wrong places. Least he needed to wake up his jitter reactions that would lead to his body giving jerking motions all night. He had enough with the odd nerve reactions where the most damage had been done. And while the chair definitely helped he never said he needed a display.
The earlier exertion was way too much already and both guides had been chiding him for not taking enough care of his body for the past few hours watching him like pair of hawks.
So he tried to do better.
In other words he had to stay off his liquor and injectables until he was back from the event.
And he wasn't the only one disabled person there after all. Federation wanted to show how much they cared for disabled rights and loved to show off the care by assigning guides and assistants to every disabled attendee so the public would see it.
In reality it was mostly for press and society. Nobody assigned anyone to a disabled person during missions or space travels. Unless they had it covered by their own money and whatnot.
His case was different and difficult to see as he was on one part tied to a crime life and he'd done many shady things in his life. His upbringing wasn't the clearest one to begin with so after being injured that badly while someplace still on most wanted list despite his outstanding aptitude test results and incredible ability to steer ships of any make made Federation run for their money even years later.
So one Admiral said word and took him in. After long rehabilitation and court attending he was given a chance to redeem himself in the eyes of universe.
And he made the decision to stick to that. In hopes that one day he'll be free again and could escape this endless circle of space travels and settle down someplace with his loved one and possibly have that family life he never had before.
The problem was the fact he came from a place that literally stripped his rights to have a life. He was genetically engineered super-soldier that was meant to never have his own persona and never be free to live.
What he originally believed was a military camp turned out to be secret independent organization that made soldiers for other organizations. He could be literally anything including spy and army. He was made to outlive most creatures and endure most terrible conditions and eventually go to a war.
But they changed their destiny by escaping the place and never finished the training.
In moments like these Noel often wondered whether it would be better if he'd stayed. He'd be sent off to some agency to be a spy or maybe sold to some secret government institutions and get sent to war zones and likes.
A tremor ran through his body at the mere thought of that possibility.
Maybe his destiny was indeed to become invalid and suffer consequences of his actions. Forever punished for not being who he was designed to be.
An old legend told about secret organization that made soldiers like him but they never wanted that fate, so they escaped and brought down the whole thing to be free in the end and counted as a part of society not some group of freaks that deserved less.
In a way they paved their own destiny while suffered from the problems that cane from being genetically engineered humans. Mutants they were called, meta-humans said others.
And while he didn't really know if was a legend or actual event regardless of that he believed in that one could make their own destiny.
I rid through the rain into the eye of the storm
Still carrying the flame, I've the torch
Failure comes at a price I can't afford
Never been half-hearted, I put my all in
Forfeited all just to answer my calling
Wearing the scars of the wars that I fought in
Should've been heading for the stars but I'm falling
The suit took its time and the rest was thankfully dealt with by the time his two assists returned.
They didn't comment any of his actions as obviously he'd dressed himself and even washed up so they just accepted his independence and moved to prep further what was expected.
Though it stuck to him as weird that they never returned any of his chitchat and was acting unlike from couple hours before.
It did feel super strange.
And super awkward.
But then it was all scheduled before and probably his attempts at independence made things bad for schedule. Which was nothing entirely new with Noel. He always made his own time and did things his way that nobody else approved unless he saved lives. That was Fleet and whole Federation for you. They cared for schedules and plans and everyone following their damn orders.
Noel was rebel. Despite his situation he did rebel against them even if it was in small ways like storing booze and excessively drinking. Even his meds were not entirely prescribed like he should've. Most of his stuff was pilfered from black market and old storages on other planetary systems. He even made effort to have his stash stored safely on his small spaceship.
Now he just needed to get rid of the kids for a bit and send off his beauty into the falling night.
And to do that he needed to either fake something or throw tantrum. Since he couldn't fake anything at this point because he could hear the voices of supervisors checking on the disabled floor and he had no option left but to throw his hissy fit.
So he did.
At first he begun whining about some shit missing from his bathroom to what one kid only went to check while the other stood soldier still by his side.
While creepy feeling intensified along with several suspicions seeming to be real, Noel found he actually had forgotten to clean up his chair and get new cushion so he made a fit out of that and added some nervous breakdown and kicked them out for being bad assistance. It seemed to work and with retreating noise of throwing things Noel crept his way up to roof.
So the thing with such floor planning and disability and actual sky scraper- which no, make it sky pusher - seemed absolutely insane. However once his brain reminded him that it was okay because it wasn't Earth and levitation happened it was perfectly logical to have easy access to higher levels and disabled transport mostly happened on higher decks with more comfort.
That fact replaced in his brain Noel turned back to his ship and prepped it up. Now he just finalized the mind sync and placed her inside the bracket his brain held out.
Connection happened easily and that left his old senses spike up and realign.
From there all that needed to do was to put her on ready to reach his signal and with that he placed the conn off and let the panther roam.
This was one great ship. For her literal VW Beetle size she held the power of full size Realta or Talla class ship.
And damn that little soul was so pretty.
A piece of another tech had once rounded up on the shore of Whabi- a river on the outskirts border or the metropolitan area. It had obviously come from colony ships as Earth technically still did this underground level so literally ninety six percent of Earth population had absolutely no idea space travel already existed. That didn't mean some freak techno folk with more money than the world together couldn't pull up a stunt. So with the logo he felt like remembering from his fucked childhood as he believed their weaponry actually was purchased on black market directly behind the Tony Stark's back. Well he was the inventor for the Stark Industries and logically that logo would be on his designs. And since they were supposed to be the future they were given those guns to train with.
But to see that logo on something that looked like power source from even further future felt out of place.
Nonetheless Noel grabbed the washouts which held loads of good tech and slinked back to his board to do some tinkering.
So the panther held Stark heart and soul while her style held hundred percent Noel Allison.
And she was worth all and every single second, breath and drop of blood he'd spent on her for those years.
And her name was kinda shady and mysterious and generally just weird for something like tiny craft- Narcho Vertega Stark.
Narcho because it still was his insignia and callsign. Vertega mostly because it was many things his insanity destroyed but also meaningful memories. And Stark because that was where his engine, power source and several important parts came from. And there he felt proud and accomplished.
When I die from the ashes an eagle will rise
As long as my blade and my faith will keep me alive
Fear ain't something that you'll see in my eyes