I apologize that I have been forever in updating. My motivational levels are so low. Please forgive me.
I'm not listening specific thank yous (besides to fiftyshadeswritergal for proofreading and encouragement through this slump!) so that I won't give myself another reason to procrastinate. Please do know, however, that I read the comments and am very grateful. Hugs!
Now, enjoy!
...
My bottom feels on fire. It hurts so much.
"I ... will not swear at you again," Ziva said sincerely, turning to Jenny with true repentance in her heart.
"I know," Jenny said softly, reaching out and taking the young lady's hand. "I forgive you and I love you so much that even if you do mess up and do it again I will still love and forgive you. But," she added regretfully, "I need to finish giving you your spanking."
Ziva grimaced and looked distastefully down at the spoon that Gibbs had placed back on the bed.
"Yes, I have to use the spoon," Jenny assured her, gently pulling her back over her knee with a sad smile. "But it won't be a very long spanking. You'll be fine, Ziva."
The burning in Ziva's eyes made her think the opposite, especially as she realized that Gibbs was not leaving as she found her her view directed toward his shoes.
"You can leave now, Gibbs. I will not swear at Jenny anymore," she promised yet again, hopeful that her reassurance would get him to leave. She was in a rush due to the fact that she could feel Jenny beginning to lower her bottoms to prepare her bare bottom on the other side.
"I know that's what you're promising but I think maybe my staying might help you keep your promise," Gibbs said calmly. He reached over and took one of Ziva's hands in his.
Why can he not just leave me alone! I do not want him here! I am about to cry - I know I am! - and he is going to see and think that I cannot take a child's punishment from Jenny and he will get angry, thinking I am trying to manipulate her and then he will punish me worse, maybe with a belt this time. I could not handle it. I could not.
A gentle squeeze distracted her from her thoughts.
He has a nice way of holding my hand, even if I do not want him here. He just spanked me with that hand but now it is so gentle.
I do not understand Americans.
Or maybe, all along, it has been that I could not understand him...?
SPANK!
The distraction of Gibbs holding her hand had kept Ziva from noticing that Jenny had finished the preparations for continuing the rather disjointed spanking. It caught Ziva off-guard and she gasped, the rebellious tears immediately springing to the corners of her eyes. She hung her head low, hoping that Gibbs would not be able to see her face if she smushed it against the quilt on her bed.
SPANK!
...
Jenny exchanged a look with Gibbs.
Do you want me to stay? he mouthed to her. They both could tell that Ziva disliked his presence.
Jenny hesitated, then nodded. She did not quite feel up to dealing with another outburst like earlier. She did not expect it but it was better to have reinforcement. Besides, she had felt Ziva's body relax a tiny bit when he took her hand. It might make it easier for Ziva to take the spanking with Gibbs' emotional support although a stranger pairing for that purpose could not be imagined.
Jenny raised the spoon again.
SPANK!
SPANK!
...
Ziva sniffled hard as she squirmed. Jenny was far too good with that spoon. It hurt a lot!
And those darn tears were not disappearing anytime soon.
SPANK! SPANK!
Not the sit spots.
SPANK! SPANK!
Yes, she is spanking my sit spots. And ... ow!
She sniffed hard.
The first two tears had escaped.
Ziva hated them, the traitors!
SPANK!
SPANK!
...
Gibbs' eyes had been locked on Ziva's face from the second that Jenny had pulled her over her knee. The only time that he had looked up was to silently communicate with Jenny. He knew that Ziva was trying to hide from him but it was difficult to hide when he was right next to her. Despite her high pain tolerance he had no doubt that her bottom was hurting her mightily.
That belief was confirmed when his observant eyes spotted a small wet area next to her face when she squirmed yet again.
She's crying, he mouthed to Jenny.
Jenny's eyes grew a little more sad but she raised the spoon again.
"No more running away, young lady," she scolded sternly.
SPANK!
SPANK!
...
Ziva gasped at the next spanks. She hated this!
And the tears just kept coming.
Gibbs will hate me. He will not respect me as an agent anymore. He will be angry. He will probably spank me again even harder!
But no matter how much she fought against it she could not override the fact that being over Jenny's lap getting a spanking always made her cry. And right now was no exception.
"I ... I will not do it ... again," she whimpered softly.
"What exactly do you mean by 'it'?" Jenny asked, shifting her focus down to Ziva's sit spots.
SPANK!
"Run away!" Ziva gasped before dissolving. She was trying so hard but she could not help her. The next breath she took she would be sobbing.
SPANK!
SPANK!
...
Gibbs looked down at his hand. Ziva had suddenly grasped it in an unconscious reaction to the pain of the spanking. He gently squeezed back. He was still there. He was still with her. He heard the muffled sob, felt her shaking and saw the telltale tear stains.
He loved her and he was not going anywhere.
He looked up at Jenny.
She can't take anymore.
Jenny met his eyes and nodded.
I wasn't going to anyway.
She set the spoon aside and reached out for a blanket folded against one of Ziva's pillows. Gibbs reached over with his free hand - no way was he going to let go of Ziva's hand when she so desperately needed to feel loved in this moment - and handed the blanket to Jenny who carefully wrapped it around Ziva in a way that the young lady remained covered and comforted while Jenny lifted her up from her lap and into her arms. Both of them felt their hearts break a little as they saw the red eyes and flushed, wet face.
"It's all over," Jenny assured her. "Your spanking for running away is all done." She kissed Ziva's forehead before cuddling her against her chest.
...
Ziva felt the spanking end but in trying to keep from crying she had no energy to try to pull up her pants and stand. The soft blanket around her provided a more comforting alternative anyway. Within seconds Jenny had her up and held close ... just like Ima had used to do. Ziva looked at her hand - Gibbs was still holding it. He had been there through the entire final part of the spanking. She forced herself to look up, dreading the look of censure that must be waiting. But if she was to be punished she wanted it done now. At least then it would be over. But when she looked up there was no anger, no disappointment, no "just wait until I punish you next" look. Just one of support and ... could it be that look was one of ... love? Love for her, Ziva David?
It was too much.
"Please ... make him go," Ziva whimpered against Jenny.
"Jethro loves you every bit just as much as I do. It's okay to cry in front of him," Jenny murmured back soothingly.
"Please!" Ziva cried desperately.
"I'll go if that's what you need," Gibbs said, standing. He paused for a second and squeezed Ziva's hand. She reluctantly let go and watched as he left. It felt like a tiny part of her heart was leaving with him. She wanted that warm connection in her hand.
But first she needed to cry. And alone and safe with Jenny, she did.
She did not know that Gibbs stood just outside in the hallway, listening to her tears and hoping, praying that somehow she would eventually feel safe enough to trust him in those situations as well.
...
"It is okay, Little One, it is okay, I promise," Jenny comforted Ziva. She had an inkling that Gibbs' presence had made the normally embarrassing (to Ziva) outpouring of emotion even worse than usual for the distraught young lady. Normally Ziva seemed to be able to allow herself to cry by justifying that it was "just Jenny". They had known each other for a long time and although there had been the same number of spankings in the last month as in there entire time knowing one another previously , Ziva seemed able to trust that Jenny was not going to make her tears public or embarrassing.
Jenny silently hoped that she had not messed things up for Ziva's journey into the realm of loving discipline. She had wanted Ziva to realize that Gibbs was not going to judge her for having feelings, but now she was concerned that maybe she had pushed too hard too fast.
...
Ziva let her body relax into the tears and crying when she was convinced that Gibbs had gone back downstairs. Somehow the tears really did help make her feel better. Her bottom was still stinging and she knew that it was going to keep doing so quite unpleasantly - this had been a very long and difficult spanking to receive. But Jenny had promised that it was over and with Gibbs gone it was safe to cry.
Although apparently a few tears in front of him were okay too.
Still, no need for it to happen again.
Ever.
...
Thank you for reading! I hope that you all are well. Stay safe and in the sunshine when possible! Hugs from afar!