Title: Perpetual

Pairing: Sterek, Stiles/Derek

Warnings: M/M, mature situations

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Part 1

Bright red and blue lights reflected back to him as Stiles sat on an icy curb on the side of the road. The snow beneath him was melting and getting his too big jeans wet, yet he wasn't fazed. People rushed back and forth in the middle of the street. Paramedics, Policeman, Fireman, Reporters. He clenched his eyes shut tightly, blocking out the sounds of sludge slushing and squad cars beeping.

Hands gently gripped him by the shoulders and Stiles eyes flew open, blurred by tears as he looked up into the worried eyes of his father. "Stiles, where is your mother?" Like a deer in headlights, the young boy just stared at John with blank scared eyes. With a grunt, the man lifted his son off the ground and into his arms; cradling the eleven year old to his chest. His hiking boots squeaked against the wet pavement as he took the boy to his car, lights still flashing.

Once he was safely set in the passenger seat and buckled in, John wandered away towards the paramedics. Stiles watched as his father tapped one of the men on the shoulder, following by the borderline horrified glance that the woman adopted upon recognizing the sheriff. There were words exchanged, words that Stiles couldn't hear yet that he clearly understood.

John put a hand to his forehead as an agonized expression crossed his face, blinking rapidly before turning to look to where his son sat in the warmth of the car. Their eyes connected for less than a moment, before his father looked away; unable to look at his son. Stiles felt his heart constrict as John avoided his gaze, a feeling of fear, sadness, and hate rising.

"Sheriff, your wife fell while out on the ice. She hit her head and Stiles dragged her the mile to the road. They had been ice skating. I'm sorry Sheriff, but it was too late."

Burning tears tracked down his face; Claudia's scream still echoing in his ears.

A sharp buzzing in his ear brought Stiles out of his sleep, the nightmare drifting back into the recesses of his mind. With a well aimed swat, he hit the snooze button of his alarm clock before groaning and throwing his arm loosely across his eyes. It was too early in the morning to even think of getting up. For a moment he just laid there, trying to bring back the dream that was actually a memory.

The back of his throat constricted almost painfully and he rubbed his eyes to stop the tears that began to gather on his lashes. It was the same thing every year. When he was young, his mother would take him out ice skating at the lake behind their house for his birthday. John had forbade them from doing it because the ice was rough and uneven, but Claudia had always said some rules were made to be broken.

It would have been easier to just drive down to the skating rink in town, though his mother was just as mischevious as he was. Every year she would take him to that place in the woods and they would chase each other around the ice; it had been their best secret. The day of his eleventh birthday had been the day when he had lost everything. Including a bit of his fathers love.

John knew that in the end, it had been his wife's decision to go to the lake; but he had been unable to see passed the fact that the decision had been made around his son. For the son that he knew couldn't let things go, who was entirely to excitable. Even though he hadn't meant to, seeing Stiles as his son became harder and harder to do until finally he was just caring for a strange kid.

After being saved from a mad woman by his own son, John had withdrawn himself to the point of no return. It was as if they weren't related; that they weren't father and son. Stiles sighed as he wiped the steady flow of tears from his face and sat up, his toes barely brushing the wood floor. His fingers raked through his hair as he stood, hissing as the cold from the floor met his warmed feet.

He pulled one of his random outfits out of his closet, a pair of jeans with a t-shirt and sweater. Once they were thrown in a messy pile on his bed, he quickly went about showering and getting cleaned up. The meeting the night before had taken longer than he had suspected, so having to drag himself out of bed after only four hours of sleep needed a little extra help this morning.

Absolutely nothing had been accomplished the night before. By the end of their meeting, Lydia had stubbornly ignored everyone when Derek didn't seem to fond of her ideas. His idea of consulting Deaton had gone completely over their heads, but his disappointment didn't last long. It was something that he had sadly grown used to; being overlooked and ignored.

There had never been a time that he had gotten on with anyone other than Scott. Despite the fact that Stiles was the obvious brains behind the operation, Scott was still held in higher esteem; or at least, that's the way Stiles saw it. He was the one to solve the puzzles and to hatch the brilliant plans to save the world. Yet when it came to remembering who thought of it, no one cared and no one said thank you.

Stiles wasn't one to do things just for the recognition of it, but when you are never acknowledged for something you've done, you start to resent the ungrateful attitude bestowed on you. After hours of discussion and arguing, Allison had spoken up quietly with the fact that it was well passed three in the morning; something that Stiles had said not even ten minutes before. Like always he had been ignored.

Derek had shot a glare at Stiles as if he was the problem, before shooing the pack out of his apartment. The last thing that Stiles saw before he walked out the front door was Isaac watching him as he left. Breaking himself out of his thoughts, he stepped into the shower. He flinched at the cool temperature before lathering up his loofa with his two in one hair and body wash.

The slightly chilly water dripped down his body as goose pimples rose along his flesh, but he could feel his mind slowly waking up and coming out of it's foggy state. He rinsed his face and finished cleaning before turning of the water, turning to throw open the curtain. Once dried off, he padded back into his room with the towel secured around his waist loosely.

A tall figure shifting in the corner of the room sent him jumping back with a yell, one hand going to hold his towel up and the other thrown up in front of him in defense. The sight of the curly haired boy had him heave a groan of relief, before he gave Isaac a half assed glare. "What the hell are you doing in my room man?" He received a blank look from the younger and without waiting for an answer he took his clothes off the bed.

"Seriously, if you need to talk to me, we can do so at school." He cracked the bathroom door behind him so that he could hear whatever Isaac had to say, before pulling on his clothes. Turning as he fastened his jeans, he jerked as he found Isaac peeking through the crack in the door. "Dude!" He said exasperated and ripped the door back open with a huff.

"I was just wondering if you had a coat that I could borrow." The words had Stiles blinking in shock for a moment before he eyed Isaac curiously. He reached into his closet and grabbed a winter coat that he had taken from his fathers closet years ago. A gray one with a thick insulated lining, yet thin enough to be comfortable. "Thank you." He watched quietly as Isaac tried it on, as he smiled softly when it fit almost perfectly.

Sighing softly Stiles turned away and put on his own coat that hung of the back of his door. "What did you need it for?" There was no answer and when he looked back over his shoulder the boy was gone. His eyebrows furrowed together, questioning for a moment if he had just imagined the interaction. Before he could confuse himself anymore he grabbed his book bag and headed out of his bedroom.

His footsteps reverberated down the stairs and he slipped on his sneakers quickly. As soon as he was out of the front door, he closed and locked the front door behind him. He rubbed his hands together frantically to gain warmth. The engine of his Jeep stalled a few times, refusing to roll over and with one final curse it revved to life loudly. The snow tires that John had helped him put on at the beginning of November rolled easily across the ice and snow that covered the road.

White scenery flashed by as he drove his way across town and into the parking lot of the school. He parked in his usual spot close to the lacrosse field and made sure to use the emergency brake, before get out and carefully walking up the stairs as to not fall. He successfully made it into the school and barely caught himself as he slipped on the slick floor just inside the door.

Rolling his eyes, Stiles weaved his way through the crowd of students until he arrived at his locker. He emptied the books for his afternoon classes into the locker with his coat and skid into his first hour class just as the bell rang. Isaac was sitting at their shared lab table still wearing the coat that Stiles had given him. Stiles laughed to himself when he realized that he wasn't hallucinating things.

The boy looked up from where he was chewing on the end of his pen distractedly as Stiles slide into the seat next to him. "What did you need the coat for man?" Those blue eyes stared into his brown ones and for a moment Stiles thought that his question was just going to be ignored. The teacher passed their desk while handing out the worksheets for the day.

"I didn't have one and I didn't want to ask Derek." Stiles eyes flickered passed Isaac to look out of the window at the winter wonderland that had graced the town for more than a month already. Isaac hadn't had a coat that entire time. When he looked back at the boy, he was already idly writing the answers he knew on his worksheet. A wrenching feeling gripped his heart, but for the moment he dropped the subject as he too began to do answer the questions.

There was a loud shout from down the hall as Stiles broke off his conversation with Scott to see what the commotion was. Two of their lacrosse teammates rushed passed them, throwing miniature snowballs at random victims; leaving a trail of screaming girls and shouting boys in their wake. Thankfully he had been able to duck out of the way in time, even as Scott was pegged straight in the forehead.

He laughed near gleefully at the confused expression on his friends face, "Gotta love those instincts, huh Scotty?" Finally Scott gave him a glare as he whipped the remnants of water off his face. Without another word they walked into the cafeteria, quickly finding a spot at their usual table once they had retrieved their food. Stiles gave Isaac a glance, but didn't say anything; not wanting to bring up their earlier discussion in front of the others.

Across from him Lydia leaned across the table and sat a delicately decorated cupcake in front of him. It was chocolate from the looks of it and covered in yellow icing with a black bat ring on it. His mind raced frantically; how could she have known? "No reason. It was given to me earlier and I find Batman tacky." It was an explanation that cut off Scott's protest at not receiving one, but from the glint in Lydia's eyes, he knew that she knew.

"Thank you Lydia." He said simply, grateful that she hadn't actually ousted him to the enter table. Other than his father, no one knew the actual day of his birthday; a fact that he had buried away to the back of his mind to forget about. In the early years of their friendship, Stiles had suggested to Scott that they celebrate their birthdays together during the summer.

Scott had agreed, never thinking about an ulterior motive. They had continued that for years, throwing a party every summer that everyone was invited to. It was strange, Stiles thought, they hadn't had time to celebrate it last summer. Too many things of the supernatural had happened, so he understood. There was almost something nice about being able to not have to keep up appearances.

He was nudged softly and Stiles immediately looked to Scott, "There is another pack meeting this afternoon." It was surprising that the news didn't shock him like it should have, but honestly he was used to Derek pulling the alpha card most days. He gave his friend a shrug and finished his sandwich quickly. With careful precision he removed the foil wrapper on the cupcake and literally devoured it in three bites, putting the small ring on his pinkie.

"I won't be able to make it, I need to finish some research for next weeks exam." There was no exam the following week, but he knew that Scott wouldn't be thinking that far ahead. He felt slightly guilty when the boy nodded in understanding, probably glad that Stiles wouldn't be there. Scott probably felt that having Stiles around for the meetings was more a liability than anything else.

"No problem, I'm sure Derek won't mind." Isaac meet Stiles eyes and for the first time since the night before, he truly felt that if he just stopped interacting with any of them, that they wouldn't care or notice. He looked away from the curly haired boy before Isaac could become good at reading expressions. The bell rang signaling the end of lunch and Stiles was glad for the distraction. "I'll see you in seventh hour Scott." With a short wave, he disappeared in the crowd, fully intending to leave school early.