"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all," Kaede sighed to herself. Because of the Corona virus, school was let out early, so Kaede made a Discord server for her class. That way, they could all keep in touch over the summer. It went well for a few weeks, but now that boredom was really setting in, people were starting to cause trouble.
"Fuck off, Kokichi! You don't even know your ass from your elbow!" Miu snapped as the self-proclaimed "Ultimate Supreme Leader" continued to taunt her. The two had been at it for about 15 minutes now, arguing over who was smarter and tech-savvier. Of course, as the Ultimate Inventor, Miu would take serious and personal offense to anyone who dared suggest that they were smarter (or tech-savvier). But rather than realize that Kokichi was just trying to make her mad, she repeatedly took his bait and argued back.
"You're an inventor, not a programmer, coder or roboticist! Let's face it! The only reason you know anything about robots is because Kee-boy is always giving you those "after-maintenance" pillow talks!" Kokichi snickered. "You shameless, dirty little pig-slut!"
"H-hey, c-c'mon!" Miu's voice rose about an octave, a clear sign that she was nervous. And most likely aroused. That girl really was shameless, always turned on by something. None of the other students had yet to get over the fact that Miu got off to Kokichi's merciless taunts.
Kaede sighed again. She had long since muted herself, and a small part of her wondered why she didn't just leave this disaster of a voice chat entirely, but as the server owner, she felt some level of responsibility over the situation, and she would've felt bad if she left. She knew she could've also technically called Kirumi to come take over for her, but she didn't want to do that either.
"Kirumi works hard enough already," Kaede told herself. Even though she knew Kirumi would've been more than willing to look after the server, Kaede still felt bad asking for her help. Especially because, admittedly, sometimes Kirumi could be a bit overbearing. Even though she was almost always right in the end, the others didn't always like her constant "helicoptering". Kaede didn't want to unnecessarily involve her.
But at the same time, Kirumi was the only other person on the server with any sort of authority. Since the server only totaled 16 people, Kaede had decided that she would only need one mod. Likewise, because this was Kirumi they were talking about, even if it were a server of 1000, if anyone could figure out how to moderate such a large number alone, it would be Kirumi. She was a one-woman army!
She was an expert with people and organization. Her skills at mediating and moderating were unmatched. She knew how to handle, run and order large groups of people. It was all part and parcel of being Ultimate Maid. Kaede just never realized how easily Kirumi would be able to translate those skills over into running a Discord. But with someone like Kirumi on the team, there really was no need for more mods.
Immediately after Kaede had created their little server, she'd considered making her boyfriend, Shuichi, a mod. But he'd been quick to protest. The poor boy didn't realize how capable he was. Instead, his insecurity and doubt led him to hastily decline the offer and Kaede had foolishly let him off the hook. In hindsight, she should've promoted him anyway. She wanted him to see how capable he truly was.
It still wasn't too late to change her mind, and Kaede was sure that if anyone could help Shuichi see his true potential, it would be Kirumi, but she would have to let everyone else know first so that no one accused her of favoritism. At least Kirumi had been a unanimous agreement. Several other students of the server had begged to be mods (mainly Kokichi, Miu, Angie and Tenko) but when Kaede suggested Kirumi, pretty much everyone immediately agreed that she was the best choice.
"But now, that means I have no one to ask for help," Kaede sighed. With Kirumi offline and Shuichi possessing no authority, it was just her. Miu and Kokichi were still arguing in the background, and now Kiibo had thrown himself into the fray, arguing against Kokichi's robophobia.
"You're just a glorified music bot," Kokichi sneered. (He'd once even changed the name of their music bot to "Lovechild of Kaede and Kiibo").
"I am not!" Kiibo snapped back. "Just because I am a robot does not mean that I'm just another Discord bot! That's robophobic!"
"I'm sure I could find a way to offload you just as easily as any other of the bots. At least they have exact functions!" Kokichi continued tauntingly.
"You do not have the permissions to do that!" Kiibo argued.
"Who said anything about permission?" Kokichi gave his trademark evil laugh, hissing and low. Kaede sighed again. She would have to keep a closer eye on him, just in case he tried hacking the server again. The last time it had happened, he'd spammed their server with so many bots that Kaede temporarily kicked everyone from the server (except Kirumi) so that the two of them could clean up Kokichi's mess.
"Now I know why they call it Discord," Kaede muttered to herself. The argument carried on.
ooo
Later that night, though, things got somewhat better. Kokichi had (finally) grown tired of causing trouble, and because more people were online, that meant that Kaede didn't only have him and Miu for company. Actually, everyone happened to be online that night.
Rantaro was posting pictures of his nails in one of the chats, having painted them rainbow in honor of Pride Month. Tsumugi was busy fangirling over her favorite LGBT anime ships and characters. Tenko (who had since changed her user to "Attack Lesbian") was busy spamming every chat with Pride flags. Angie was posting Pride art. Miu was busy in the NSFW chats, "celebrating body and sex positivity", as she put it.
Every pfp now had a Pride flag overlay, and some names were changed to queer puns, and most of them were in VC, discussing how they'd celebrate Pride during Corona time.
"Well, that is sort of the reason I made this server," Kaede admitted bashfully. "I know pretty much all of us here are some form of queer, so this was meant to be a Pride server just as much as it was meant to be a hangout place."
"Ah, were you hoping to throw some virtual events in celebration?" Kiibo asked, sounding interested.
"Of course the machine would be interested in a digital celebration!" Kokichi interrupted with a cruel laugh.
"Yes, I was thinking each of us could have two days out of this month in order to lead the festivities. I know that means we will need 32 days instead of 30, since there are 16 of us, but that way, we each get to celebrate Pride how we want while sharing it with the others!" Kaede ignored Kokichi.
"Oooh, great idea, Kaede!" Tsumugi cried excitedly. "I have a long list of LGBT animes we can binge for my two days!"
"Fuckin' weeb," Miu snickered.
"Otaku," Tsumugi corrected proudly, not at all bothered by Miu's attempt at an insult.
"What?" Miu scoffed, in disbelief that any weirdo could somehow consider their love of anime as a positive trait. But that was Tsumugi for you! She loved fandoms and fanfics. She was the Ultimate Cosplayer after all! Anime forever!
"I wonder if we can do anything space-related for my days!" Kaito said excitedly. "After all, I know Space Gays are a thing!"
"But you're not gay, Kaito!" Even though no faces were visible, they didn't need to be in order for the others to know that Maki was probably facepalming or rolling her eyes at the Ultimate Astronaut right about then.
"Space is my truest love! I'm gay and straight and everything in between for it!" Kaito declared proudly. "Space-o-sexual!"
"You're such an idiot!" Maki growled, but for once, Kaito didn't seem bothered by the insult. Or perhaps it was because it was coming from Maki. As much as Kaito adored space, it was no secret how much he loved Maki, too. Or as he called her, "Maki-roll", much to her annoyance.
"If I may make a suggestion, perhaps a study of the LGBT community across different cultures would be enjoyable," Korekiyo was next to go. His voice was soft, but there was a creepy quality to it that quickly ended any further discussion between Kaito and Maki. "It would also be an enlightening look upon another facet of humanity and human sexuality. I think we would all benefit from knowing the history of the culture and how it differs across the world. Love and sexuality has always been a point of great contention, after all, and I am sure that there are plenty of societal rules and rituals we have yet to learn about. How wonderful and complex this world can be!" They could hear the pleasured shiver in his voice.
"Good idea, Kiyo," Kaede filled the silence when no one else would. Korekiyo had always been a bit… creepy. But they all joked that he was already well-prepared for the outbreak because he always wore a face-mask anyway. It was cool, but strange…
"And actually, that would tie in well with what I wanted to do," the voice chat relaxed as this next speaker piped up. It was Shuichi, the shy but likeable one of the group. Kaede smiled on reflex as she heard his voice.
"What have you got, Shuichi?" Kaede encouraged him.
"I was thinking about reading or talking about LGBT literature," he replied. "That could tie in well with a cultural study, and depending on what we read, it could also help us become better advocates and representatives to this community!"
"Awww, what a great idea, Shuichi!" Kaede's smile grew even bigger. Shuichi gave a soft, nervous, flattered laugh before quickly DMing Kaede several heart emojis, all of which she returned in kind. Plus a few kisses as well. Shuichi felt himself turning red. Oh how he adored her! She was just so sweet and wonderful! And Kaede felt the exact same way about him…
"BOOOOOOOORING!" Miu snorted rudely, ruining the moment. "If we're gonna be 'studying the LGBT community' to see how, and who, they do, why don't you all just come clean and admit that you wanna get down and dirty watchin' NSFW stuff?! That's what I want to spend my two days doing! I'll show you all some real hands-on learning! None of that boring history class stuff!" she bragged loudly. "Maybe I could make a virtual reality world where we can all… explore… with one another? It is a digital celebration after all!" her voice got very low and breathy.
"Wait, but I would genuinely be interested in studying human culture and sexuality and how they intertwine!" Kiibo interrupted innocently, before anyone else could criticize Miu's terrible idea. If she really wanted to do a NSFW thing for her days, Kaede already knew most of the chat would choose to stay offline on those days.
"Oh, come on, don't be such a boring buzzkill!" Miu snapped. "I didn't come here to learn! School sucks and this server is supposed to be an escape from that!" she whined. "Besides, if you want a little lesson in human sexuality, I'd be more than happy to be your teacher," she added seductively.
"I don't like the way you phrased that," Kiibo replied nervously.
"Well, Gonta think it good idea!" Gonta finally spoke up. Because he was still very new to the world of technology (heck, he was still new to the modern world in general!) he'd stayed quiet for most of the night. In fact, it had taken him nearly half an hour just to figure out how to enter a voice chat. It was only thanks to Kirumi's endless patience and teaching skill that Gonta made it onto Discord at all.
"Gonta wonder if bugs can celebrate Pride too?" he asked hopefully. "Some bugs look like Pride flags. That fit, right? They come in many colors! Like rainbow!" But the others were quick to shut the idea down in disgust. As always, Miu was the loudest.
"Eeew, gross, no!" the Ultimate Inventor cried. "What kind of fetishes do you have?! Is that what you did for fun in the wild?!"
"What… is a… fetishes?" was Gonta's only reply. But before anyone could answer, Kaede was quick to intervene.
"That's enough of that topic!" she said quickly. "Anyway, I'm sure we can find a way to include a bug day or two into our Pride Fest!"
"Fuckin virgin. Doesn't even know how to have a real good time," Miu snickered under her breath, but Kaede continued to ignore her.
"I was thinking about just doing some mini Pride concerts, you know? Playing queer music made by queer artists for queer people!" she said.
"Oh, that would be wonderful," Shuichi was the first to speak his approval. "Can I guess that you're writing something original as well?" Because he knew Kaede better than anyone, he knew that the girl loved to compose almost as much as she loved to play, and no doubt, she would unveil at least one original song before the month was out.
"You know me too well," Kaede laughed warmly. Shuichi smiled to himself, hiding a blush behind his screen. Kaede's laugh never failed to brighten his day and it only became all the sweeter knowing that he was the one who'd made her laugh!
"These are all excellent ideas," Kirumi said at last, sounding genuinely pleased and proud. "Please let me know if there is any way I can assist! I have no ideas of my own, as of yet, but I still wish to support all of you as best I can!"
"Awwww, thank you, Kirumi, you're too kind," Kaede smiled, and even though Kirumi couldn't see it, she could hear it in Kaede's voice.
"Ha! Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy!" Kokichi teased, ruining the moment again. "Gee, Kaede, I didn't know you had a Mommy Kink!" he snickered.
"Or a maid kink!" Miu agreed, also laughing raucously. "Hope Shuichi doesn't mind! Unless you guys are all down from some kind of orgy later!"
"Miu!" Kaede pleaded, beginning to blush violently. She was so glad this was only a voice call.
"Kokichi! Miu!" although Kirumi's voice was even softer than Kaede's, it carried such authority that it, unlike Kaede's voice, was not drowned out by Miu and Kokichi's childish jokes. "Enough! You both know not to tease Kaede over such things. She is bisexual and in a very committed, happy relationship with Shuichi. And you know I am asexual and have no such desire for these sorts of things.
"Perhaps you think you were merely making a jest, but it would be wise of both of you to be more aware of the feelings of others next time. Miu, I do not appreciate you turning my Talent into a mere kink. And Kokichi, you know I do not like being called a mother in any capacity. I am only a high schooler, just as the rest of you all are. Please keep that in mind next time before you speak!"
For a moment, there was only silence, then Kokichi gave an obnoxiously loud sigh right into his mic, deafening everyone else.
"Ok, mom," he said. In response, Kirumi also sighed, but hers was far quieter and far more sincere. Unlike Miu, however, Kirumi refused to rise to Kokichi's bait and engage him in a petty, senseless fight. Such immaturity was unbecoming of a maid. And a mod.
"Why don't we just save ourselves the trouble and ban him?" Maki finally spoke up again, her annoyance at Kokichi overriding her silent nature.
"Because he has not technically broken any rules and I do not wish to remove any of our classmates from this server," Kirumi replied ruefully.
"Then let my two days of this month be two days without him," Maki grunted. "Kick him and then invite him back later."
"Or at least server-mute him!" Tsumugi piped up helpfully… and hopefully.
"Awww, you guys are all so mean!" Kokichi whined. "I thought this was "Love is Love" month. Besides, I'm bisexual just like Kaede and Shuichi and yet you aren't banning them!"
"Because unlike you, they are actually loving. You are quite hateful!" Kiibo said disapprovingly.
"Besides, I highly doubt that anyone here believes that you're bi," Maki agreed darkly, growling again. It was one of the rare times when she'd challenge someone's claim to a certain sexuality, but that was only because Kokichi was a self-admitted pathological liar.
"Is this because of all the 'robophobic' remarks?" Kokichi continued to sound heartbroken. "I said I was just joking!"
"Gah! But it does not feel like a joke!" Kiibo grunted. "It always feels as if you are being very rude!"
"Well, how would a robot be able to tell the difference between a real insult and a playful one anyway?" Kokichi's hurt tone instantly switched back to its usual, cheerful, mocking tone and everyone else groaned in annoyance. That was Kokichi for you, ever the pathological liar and manipulator.
Around this time, Kaede received a DM from Kirumi.
Shall I server mute him?
No. Not yet at least. I don't want to cause more trouble and, for better or worse, it hasn't gotten as bad as it could be... Kaede replied. She was referring to one incident just a few days ago when Kokichi had somehow changed everyone's nicknames on the server and basically all of them were either lewd or rude. There was no in-between. Kirumi had gotten off the easiest with the nickname "Maid Mom", but she had taken severe offense and had given Kokichi a three-day-long server mute. Kaede's nickname had been… less flattering than Kirumi's.
The only other time they'd needed to server-mute someone was Miu (no surprises there). Kaede opened the server with everyone having the ability to screenshare, but after Miu tried to make herself into a cam girl, turning on her cam while she was totally naked, that had ended fairly fast.
"Oh, come on, how else is anyone supposed to get some while we're all on lockdown and doin' that stupid 'social distance' crap?! You all should be on your knees thanking me for being so generous! Besides, who doesn't want to see this slammin', sexy-ass body o' mine?!" she made sure to puff out her chest as she said this. Kaede's only response had been to remove her screenshare abilities. But even without those, Miu still spent plenty of time posting in the "Ludes n Newds" chat. Kaede made sure to never visit that one…
Kokichi was, blessedly, silenced when Ryoma, Tenko, Rantaro, Himiko and Angie all joined the chat.
"Yoo-hoo!" Angie sing-songed. "Atua told me you were all planning a digital celebration and he wants to see!"
"Atua? More like you just looked in the fuckin' voice chat text," Miu grunted. She found Angie's endless cheer to be quite grating.
"If any of you needs any Pride art, I would be happy to draw or paint or sculpt whatever you need!" she offered, ignoring Miu's snide remark. "And this time, because this is cause for celebration for all of us, I will only charge half a pint of blood! Nyahahaha!"
"I don't think that's very sanitary," Kaede gave a nervous laugh. "Especially with Corona and all…" Even though Angie was always asking for blood donations to Atua, it still creeped Kaede out every single time.
"Oh, don't worry, Atua's divine and holy power will keep the blood pure and clean!" Angie sing-songed serenely. "Praise be to Atua!"
"Fuckin' crazy-ass Atua-bitch!" Miu muttered under her breath, but again, she went ignored.
"I think that for my two days, you should ban all the boys on this server and let me and Himiko take over!" Tenko interrupted loudly.
"Ummm, Tenko, Pride is for everyone," Kaede said gently.
"The degenerate males can go start their own sever!" Tenko scoffed coldly, rolling her eyes even though she knew Kaede couldn't see.
"But one of these "degenerate males" you so despise is my boyfriend, I kinda don't want to spend Pride without him," Kaede tried to reason.
"Psssh, you could do soooo much better with a girl!" she said. "Besides, I'm sure Himiko agrees with me! Right, Himiko?" Tenko asked hopefully.
"Nyeh, it doesn't really matter to me," Himiko said dully, voice flat and tired as always. "I guess I can do something magic for you all on my days."
"Oh sweet! A magic show! Crazy excited! You're awesome, Himiko!" Tenko continued to try to hype Himiko up. The flirting went unnoticed.
"Nyeh, I guess," the others could hear the indifferent shrug in the Ultimate Magician's voice.
"Well, whatever you ultimately decide to do, I'd rather like to stick around just to watch," Ryoma said, his low voice a startling contrast to Himiko, Tenko and Angie's. "I may not be into celebrations, but this server at least gives me something to do other than stare at the wall all day."
"Don't worry, Ryoma," Kaede promised. "No one is getting banned or kicked." Except maybe Miu and/or Kokichi… she thought, but she wisely decided not to say this out loud. At the same time, Kaede got a DM from Tenko.
I know you somehow like some of the degenerate males on this server, but I do hope you'll give serious consideration to my proposition and let me know if anything ever changes between now and then!
Yeah, not gonna happen, Tenko, Kaede typed back tiredly. No one is getting kicked or banned, male or female.
Awwwwwww, ok… Tenko followed the message up with some sad faces and lesbian flags, but Kaede chose not to reply this time.
"Well, to be honest, I'm down for anything," Rantaro said. He was the last one to give input. "I don't really have any ideas yet either."
"Well, that's ok," Kaede reassured him. "We can just put your two days closer to the end of the month so you have more time to decide. I saw your nail pictures earlier and I think they look really cool. Maybe you could do a makeup tutorial? Or a fashion/drag-show? Or a jewelry display?"
"Ooooh, that would be awesome!" Tsumugi was the one to butt in this time. "That could go excellently with my cosplay tips! We could talk all about how to celebrate Pride in style!"
"Well, if that's what you all want, I'd be happy to do it," Rantaro agreed.
"Alright! Then it looks like we have something of a plan falling into place!" Kaede decided. Even though not everyone had made a decision, like she had told Rantaro, there was more than enough time.
"Excellent, then, whenever you are ready, I can help get things set up," Kirumi spoke up again. "I am sure that, with our combined effort and talent, we will still be able to make this year's Pride an enjoyable one! I will do my best to make sure this digital celebration goes off without a hitch!"
"Agreed!" Kaede smiled. "I have every confidence in all of you!" And the others all managed to muster up some sort of enthusiastic reply. Even the lower-energy folks like Himiko, Ryoma and Maki managed to at least grunt in assent. It wasn't much, but it was a start, and Kaede appreciated the sentiment either way. Her discord was rife with, well, discord, but in perfect little moments like this, it became totally worth it.
AN: Happy birthday to Penguinlover611, to whom this fic is dedicated to!