*Author's Note: Definitely haven't forgotten about this fic, its just been a crazy few weeks! Excited about the upcoming chapters.

Chapter 4

Abby Badica was a Moroi that I've always liked. Most people like her. She never grew out of being bubbly and welcoming and was always nice to dhampirs, which definitely can't be said for a lot of her kind. She was also one of the few graduates who lived at Court while commuting to college. Due to her uncommon schedule, she was granted a guard part-time that worked around her school schedule. It was also a not well kept secret that she was training in her father's footsteps as a ceremony leader. Having her here was beginning to work out well for Lissa. With so many royals ruffled by an eighteen year old Queen, she could use as many allies as possible, and Abby had proven herself as loyal these past few months. It was a shame I was going to have to potentially put her out of a guardian for a day or so.

Having finished her shift, Meredith's guard was down. She didn't notice that when she made a turn around a corner, I followed. She didn't even notice that when she entered her guardian building, I entered shortly after. Her awareness of her environment did increase as she entered the elevator. I hopped on with another guardian.

"Oh hey," she said.

I nodded my head in acknowledgement, keeping my expression blank, trying to hold in all of my Rose irrationality as I counted each floor we went up, finally stopping to the eighth one. Meredith and I were slowly on the mend after our…encounter when I had to escape jail. She stepped out first and once again I followed. Now hyper aware of my presence, she glanced at me every couple of seconds in confusion as we made our way down the hall. The silence was a little awkward, but I couldn't afford making a scene in public and with cameras watching.

"You wanted to hang out," she asked as she slid her key into the door knob, barely cracking open the door.

I pushed it all the way open, and then pushed her inside as well.

"Hey—"

The loud slamming of the door cut her off. "What are you doing," she yelled.

"I think the real question is what the HELL have you done?!" I finally felt comfortable raising my voice.

"I haven't done anything," she hissed, "you're the one barging in my room and pushing me around."

I yanked out the print of the video still shot that Matt printed off for me and threw it at her. "Enough with the B.S. we caught you red-handed." I placed my on my hips, daring her to deny the evidence. "I don't know what game you're playing with Robert but I promise you, you won't like the results," I seethed.

Meredith crossed her arms defensively. "I don't even know what you're talking about. Who is Robert and what is this supposed to mean?" She held up the photo. I can't believe she was actually trying to play dumb.

"Why did you put that envelope under my door? Who gave it to you? What do you want?" I began firing off my questions, one louder than the other. Meredith better start talking soon.

"I don't want anything," she said, "I was just delivering a letter to you."

"Who gave it to you to deliver," I asked.

She looked at the photo in consternation. "I - I don't remember."

I gave her an incredulous look, "what do you mean 'you don't remember'?"

"I just remember that I was supposed to give it to you." What?

"My name wasn't on the envelope. It was completely blank, so how did you know you were supposed to give it to me?" I stared her down.

She continued to look at the piece of paper like it was going to tell her about its day. After what felt like hours, but was probably just 30 seconds, she finally replied. "I don't know."

So I did the first thing that came to my mind…I lunged at her. Meredith's eyes bulged open in surprise as she tried to dodge my attack, but half of her back hit the table, causing her trip and both of us to fall sideways. The impact of the hard floor was unforgiving.

"What the HELL?!" It was rare for Meredith to swear. Her arms reached at my neck as I flipped us over lightning fast and straddled her. She tried to lift herself up, but I firmly pushed her down.

"I'm not letting you go until you give me some real answers." I was trying to keep my breath while trying to recover from the fall and hold a thrashing liar down.

"You're a fucking psycho!" Meredith's arms were flying everywhere as she bucked wildly against my hold. She managed to get a good scratch on my chin but she was going to have to put a lot more effort in to get the upper hand.

"I was in fucking jail about to be killed for something I didn't do," I yelled as I applied pressure to her chest, "You know I wasn't trying to hurt you, but you TEAM UP with Robert —"

"I DON'T KNOW WHO THE HELL ROBERT IS!" Meredith's rage must have finally kicked in to give her the extra edge to push me hard enough to topple over onto my side. She attempted to roll over onto me, but I kicked her hard, sending her flying back. As she attempted to get up, I swiftly got onto my knees and grabbed her from behind. My right forearm hooked around her neck and I pulled her back down. Immediately I was reminded of that day of her losing consciousness in my chokehold. My arms instantly fell to my side. I can't do this again.

Meredith took advantage of my retreat to push me onto my back. She was about to strike when she noticed I had gone still. Still enraged, but also confused as hell, she just sat there on her knees trying to figure out my next move.

"I don't want to fight. I just don't understand." I stared at the tiles on the ceiling, counting them.

"I honestly don't know what this is about," Meredith said emotionally. "I don't want to fight with you anymore."

"Do you have any idea what was in the envelope, how terrified I was? How terrified I am?" I continued to look at the tiles. I felt like they were the only thing keeping the tears away.

She looked perturbed by my statement. "I swear I don't know," she began, "I don't know why I don't remember who Robert is. I don't know who gave the envelope to me or how I knew I was supposed to give it to you, but I swear I don't know what's going on." Turning my head towards Meredith, her wild eyes seemed to exude sincerity. "You have to believe me," she cried.

Why would she lie about something like this, especially when I have proof of her sliding the envelope under my door. She has to be telling the truth. "I'm so sorry Meredith," I said, covering my face with my hands. "I don't know what's going on, but I think you might have been compelled."

Meredith looked frantic."But why would someone do that?!"

"I don't know," I replied, and began to try and stand up.

"Who's Robert and what was in the envelope," she asked, "is someone trying to hurt you?"

"I don't think it's safe to say right now," I said as she stood up.

"But someone compelled me, someone violated me." She was becoming more and more unnerved about the situation and started pacing.

"And I'm narrowing down the details I swear, I won't let them get away with this." Meredith could hear the determination in my voice and sighed. "So what do we do?"

"For right now, I don't want you to do anything. Don't trust anyone right now. I'll check in with you and keep you updated." I walked towards the door. "I'm really sorry again, for everything," I said.

Meredith slugged her shoulders. "I'm trying to put myself in your position and I can't say I would behave that differently, but this is the last time you attack me. We were supposed to be on the same side, remember."

I gave her a small sad smile. "I remember, I swear I do."

—

I headed back to my place feeling more than a little bit defeated. The chill of the air cut through my bones. I have to stop not wearing a jacket. I was no closer to finding Robert and I had reset my relationship with Meredith back to zero. I cursed myself for not staying level headed. I was a guardian now, I couldn't afford to keep making rash decisions. Too much is on the line now. I needed to get my head in the game.

As I got closer to my destination, a different kind of chill ran up through my spine. I started to feel like someone was behind me. I turned around but found nothing. Something feels weird. I hurried up to my building, feeling a sense of both relief and apprehension. Who knows what is waiting for me, but at least I'll be surrounded by warmth.

Once I got to my room, I was glad to find no other "gifts" left for me and headed straight to my bedroom. Throwing my keys onto my nightstand, I let out a tired sigh and tried to find the strength to shower. I needed to refresh myself and start going through Guardian Mackinzie's documents. I sluggishly moved towards the bathroom, stripping and throwing my garment on the floor along the way. My hands sluggishly clutched the valve, turning it counter clockwise until it was facing the long red line. The falling hot droplets felt heavy. Maybe I was the one who felt heavy. The steam encroached upon my lungs, overwhelming it. Overwhelm. It took a while for me to notice the tears falling down my face, converging with the driblets pouring down on me. It was all starting to catch up. The breakout, Dimitri, Victor. Slumping against the tiles, I let it all out.

—

Feeling a lot better after my shower, I was half sitting up on my bed under the covers with papers scattered on top of them. Of the 312 visitors, 117 were male names. I decided to prioritize those for now. 12 of those names signed in within the past two weeks. There were 20 guests who signed in and have not signed out yet.

It would be extremely hard to get into Court without checking in with the guardians. This was the most secure place in our world and became even more secure once it was realized that a teenage girl and her mentor could break out of their jail and go on the run. Robert didn't strike me as stable enough to plan an elaborate break in, and technically he wasn't under any warrant for arrest so he could have theoretically signed in. However it was unlikely that he would do so under his name, and the logs verified my claims. He either signed in as someone else or broke in, preferring to stay under the radar.

I decided to start off by verifying all of the male guests that had not signed out yet. After planning out my next moves and looking through my notes on the dhampir program, I decided to get some rest. I can't underestimate Robert, and would need all of my energy.

—

I was up earlier than I usually would, needing to make as much progress as I could before my shift started. Heading over to the small but nice building that hosts guests and dignitaries coming in and out of Court. While walking, I started to get that weird feeling again. Someone was watching me. Was it Robert?

I remembered Amy, the nice guardian that checked me in when I first visited here as a novice. Smiling, I made my way over to her.

She gave me a warm smile, "Guardian Hathaway, nice to see you again."

I still wasn't quite used to being called what everyone calls my mother. "You know you don't have to call me that," I said politely.

She gave me a knowing look, "Still reminds you of your mother doesn't it?"

"Yep," I giggled. "Don't say it too loud or you might conjure her."

"Can't have that can we," she laughed, "so what can I do for you Rose?"

I rested my hands on the edge of the reception desk. "I was hoping you could help me out with something." How do I say this in a non-weird manner? "Hans gave me an exercise…a challenge of sorts, and I'm just following leads."

She tilted her head back in exasperation. "He's STILL doing that? You're already on the royal guard for goodness sake, I'm sure your plate is full enough!" Hans was known for giving out training challenges and testing new guardians.

I gave her a pathetic look. "He claims he's making us 'better guardians' and keeping us on our toes." I laughed at her expression. "Yea so, I got this list from security of people who haven't checked out yet, and I just wanted to confirm they are still here." I handed her the list names.

"Well I - let's see what we can do." As she started typing on the computer, I strategically leaned my left arm on the desk in an appearance of rest. In actuality I was looking over her shoulder as much as I could. I had re-ordered the names and memorized their place. It was unlikely I could get the room numbers, but perhaps I could catch a glance of them.

"Mr. Loveridge is still checked in."

Glancing at her screen I could slightly makeout that he was in room 203. I quickly noted that on my copy. "Is he a Moroi or Dhampir," I asked.

"Moroi," she replied. I decided to test my luck. "Could you tell me what room he's in?"

She looked up at me. "That kind of violates policy, I'm afraid."

I gave her an easy going look, "It's ok, whatever you can give me."

She confirmed a few others on the list until one name made her stuck. "Hmmm…I'm not seeing a Mr. Morozov currently signed in. Oh wait, it looks like he signed out 3 days ago." I made note of that.

"I spoke to Guardian Sidorov as he left his room not too long before you came, so you can mark that one off. Lovely man." I spied that he was on the first floor.

Amy and I continued like this for a while. In all, she was able to account for 17 of the 20 guests. Two checked out earlier and one was missing entirely.

"Thank you so much for all of this," I told her. As she was about to reply, I glanced at the clock on the wall. My shift was starting in a couple minutes!

"I'm gonna be late if I don't run!" I took off, throwing a "thanks again" as I rushed out the door. Lissa may be my best friend, but I don't want to slack off, especially when she needs me.