this is me trying

chapter five: wasn't just a cute kid

tatum

My eyes blink open frantically as my mind slowly begins to regain consciousness. I let out a groan as I stretched my arms over my arm, nearly knocking off the lamp from the side table behind me. I sit up as I hear a ring come from the doorbell. That must have been what woke me up.

I stand from the couch and slowly make my way to the front door, noticing it is daylight outside. How long have I been asleep? I open the front door to an unfamiliar face. "Hi!" The girl with a full head of long bronze curls smiles at my overly friendly. She appears to be no older than 20 years old, making her at least three years younger than me. "I'm Renesmee! But most people just call me Nessie or Ness." She holds out her hand for me to shake it.

I stare down at her hand momentarily still hazy from sleeping just a few minutes ago before I reach my hand forward, shaking it with hers. "Hi, I'm Tatum." I say when I finally find my manners.

Renesmee giggles as she notices my slight confusion in who she is. "I know you must be confused. I'm Jacob Black's fiancee. I have heard so much about you." She beams happily. A light bulb goes off in my head. Sue had mentioned that Jacob had a fiancee now when I ran into her the other day at the grocery store. She was supposed to be at the dinner, which I must have slept through. "We missed you at dinner last night." She says confirming my assumptions of missing dinner.

"Yeah." I answer with a small smile. My voice is still really rough from just having woken up. "I've been super jet lagged. I seemed to have slept through dinner." I confess.

Again, Renesmee giggles her musical laugh. "Oh I understand." She assures me. "I was coming to invite you to a bonfire that Jake and I are having tonight at our place. I invited your sisters as well. We are going to have food and drinks. It should be a good time." Drinks? There is no way this girl is old enough to legally drink. "Jake and all the guys speak very fondly of the Locklear triplets. I would love to get to know you. And I know it must feel weird to be back in La Push after all these years. I just want you to know that we are always here for you if you need someone."

That is sweet of her and I really appreciate the invite. After my heart-to-heart with my mom yesterday, I realized that I need to make a better effort with not only my family but everyone else as well. I really should go. Besides, a bonfire should be a lot of fun. There are no parents to disappoint. And if I am going to be here in La Push for a while like I plan to, I don't want to be all alone. "That sounds really nice." I say, smiling "What time does it start?"

"We are thinking around 5:30 or so." Renesmee answers. "Our house is a little difficult to get to. The GPS doesn't really seem to be able to find it. But I can have Jake or one of the other guys pick you up."

I shake my head. "Don't worry about it. I can just ride with one of my sisters or something." I promise. "Do you need me to bring anything? Food or drink-wise?" I ask.

Renesmee shakes her head. "I think we've got it handled. We are planning to have hot dogs on the fire and side dishes. As well as s'mores for dessert. If you want to bring drinks, that may be about the only thing I can think of. But I'm sure the guys will have plenty to share." She promises me. "I can give you my number in case you get lost trying to find our place or if you need a ride."

"Sure." I respond. "You can come in if you want. I am going to run and grab my phone." I say before moving into the living room. I grab my phone off the side table and scan over the many notifications on my lock screen. I click on my contacts and press add new contact. "Here you go." I say, handing my phone to Renesmee, who had stepped into the foyer of the house.

Her thumbs type quickly against the screen of the phone as she puts in her number. I hear a ping coming from another phone. "Awesome." Renesmee chirps. "I sent myself a message so I have your number too." She says, giving me my phone back. "I can't wait to see you tonight and get to know you more." She says grinning.

I smile back. "Me too."

"Goodbye, Tatum. I will see you soon." She says, stepping outside. I say a soft goodbye before shutting the door.

Wow, I just agreed to a bonfire.

I walk back into the kitchen, scanning through the various notifications on my phone. I have several miscalls from my mom and a few from both of my sisters. I also had several text messages from my sister scolding me for not coming to dinner. I sent a message back apologizing for not showing up and giving them my very real excuse of oversleeping my nap. As I begin to make myself a bowl of cereal, I notice the time is nearing 1 pm. I dial my mom's number.

"Hi, Tatum, dear." My mom answers. Her voice is low and she doesn't sound very happy. "We missed you at dinner last night." She says immediately, making me feel guilty.

"I'm so sorry, mom." I gush truthfully. "I decided to take a nap after you left so I would be rested for dinner. And I slept through dinner. I just woke up." I say very guilty.

My mom sighs. "I'm not mad, sweetheart. You needed sleep. You looked so exhausted yesterday during lunch. It was probably best that you caught up on your sleep." She answers.

"Yeah." I mumble before shoveling a spoonful of cereal into my mouth.

"Dinner went pretty good last night. We will have to have another one soon so you can be there too. Leah Clearwater missed it too. Hopefully next time she can make it too." My mom rambles.

"That would be nice." I say politely, really not wanting to have dinner with everyone. But I am trying to be considerate of her feelings, especially after our talk yesterday.

"What are your plans for today?" My mom questions.

I spin my spoon in my cereal as I answer her question. "Um, well, Renesmee, I guess Jacob's fiancee, came by just a few minutes ago to invite me to a bonfire tonight at their place. So I might go to that tonight."

"Oh, that's awesome." My mom gushes happily. "I think you and Nessie would make great friends. She is a very sweet girl. And I think the bonfire is a really good idea. You will get to see everyone from La Push your age. You can rekindle. It will be nice to get to see everyone again." Yeah, I'm not exactly sure about that.

"Yeah, it will be nice." I say noncommittally. "Especially if I plan to be here a while." I add.

My mom hums in agreement. "Well I am glad that you have plans for tonight, sweetheart. Have fun tonight, okay? Try to get to know Nessie too. She is just darling. I will call you tomorrow morning. Bye sweetheart. Love you."

"Love you, mom." I say before hanging up.

I finish my bowl of cereal before deciding that I need to shower if I plan on being social tonight. I also need to find something to wear. I didn't have any time to run out to the store since the closest clothing store is in Port Angeles, so something that I already have is going to have to work.

I take a long hot shower in the guest bathroom before I dig through my small collection of clothing. All the clothing I have I carried in a backpack through the forty-seven countries I visited. I traded some of my old clothes for new clothes every once in a while when the clothing was too old or if I just got tired of it.

After digging through my clothes, I settled on a grey turtleneck sweater and a pair of dark washed jeans. Instead of trying to mess with my hair, I decide to put it up in two braids. If I want to take it out later, it will have a pretty beach wave look.

I try to text my sisters to see if they are going to the bonfire tonight, but I seem to be getting the silent treatment from them. It isn't uncommon for them to give me the silent treatment. Tessa and Taylor really didn't get along with me. I am the complete opposite despite being triplets. Tessa is the oldest, therefore, instinctively inherited a motherly trait. She feels the need to scold me for my mistakes just as a mother would. She is often really shy around people our own age because she is an old soul and doesn't seem to interact with younger people. Taylor, on the other hand, is extremely shy. She prefers to spend her time alone, maybe doing some homework or reading.

My mom always called me her wild child when I was young. I was a bit of a chatterbox and never seemed to have met a stranger. So my bubbly and social personality clashes with my sisters.

I shake off the lack of response from my sisters and send a text to Renesmee, asking for her address. I put on make-up as I wait for her response. I receive a text with the address listed after finishing my make-up.

I punched the address into the GPS app on my phone to see Renesmee was right when she said the GPS had a hard time giving direction to her house. According to the GPS, her house is literally located in the middle of nowhere. I guess I will find my way somehow.

But after I set off to find her house, I realize I am sadly mistaken. There is no finding this place. I am currently driving down a dirt road through the woods and it appears there is nothing but woods for miles to come. There is a fork in the dirt road and that is when I give in. I need to call Renesmee and have her find me. I am completely lost.

I put my car in park as I dug for my phone. I scroll through my contacts looking for her contact. A knock on my window causes me to nearly jump out of my skin. I jerk my head over expecting to see some ax murderer but instead see a guy with the Quileute russet skin color and black hair.

I roll down my window as the guy outside cracks a grin. "Are you lost?" He smirks.

I swallow. "Um, yes." I admit. "I am trying to find…" I pause to read the address from the text that Renesmee had sent me.

"Jacob and Nessie's house?" The guy asks before I could spiel off the address.

"Oh, yes."

The guy chuckles. "I'm heading that way, too. I can show you the way." He offers. I nod my head before he walks around to the passenger side door of my car. I unlock the door and allow him in before a sense of worry emerges in my stomach. I don't know this guy. He could totally kill me right now. "I'm Brady by the way." He introduces himself when he is seated in the passenger seat. "I am a friend of Jake's."

I nod my head. "Nice to meet you." I say before shifting the car out of park and into drive. "I am Tatum."

"Oh, Tatum Locklear?" Brady asks immediately. I nod my head. "Oh nice to put a name to a face. I knew your brother. Great guy." I swallow the lump in my throat just wishing that Brady would start on the directions to Jacob and Renesmee's house. And thankfully he does.

It takes us another five minutes before we finally see a small cottage in the midst of the forest green. I park my car next to the other line of cars before Brady and I get out. "Thank you so much. I don't know what I would have done." I admit as Brady and I walk toward the house. "I probably would still be lost."

Brady cracks a smile. "No problem." He leads the way to the back of the house where there is a large deck and tons of people packed on it. There is also a fire pit in the grass clearing where some of the guys are gathered to try and start a fire.

I see Renesmee come running toward me before she wraps me up in her arms. "I'm so glad you came." She says happily. "Did you find your way here okay?" She asks as she pulls away from the hug.

"Um, I got lost but I ran into Brady on the way." I say with a shrug. I pause for a moment realizing that Brady was walking here. Why didn't he have a car? There was no way he could hike his way here. That is so strange. I focus my attention back to Renesmee. "Thank you again for inviting me." I smile.

"Oh no worries." She grins back. "Let me introduce you to some people." She pulls me through the crowd before she stops at a group of girls. Their ages range. Most with the familiar Quileute features. And there are my two sisters, who just like over text, avoid me. They don't look over to me as Renesmee begins introducing everyone. Most of the girls I had already met or at least had heard my parents mention their names.

One girl that I hadn't met was named Vanessa Wood. Vanessa had mentioned that she and her family had moved down to La Push a few years ago from Makah reservation. She is around my age, maybe a year or two younger than me. She seems very welcoming toward me, not that the others aren't. But the other girls just seem busy with the guys around them as they joke with them or are busy with their kids that ran around.

"Is it good to be back?" Vanessa asks me after the group of girls breaks up. Nessie went to start prepping for dinner. My sisters were avoiding me like the plague so they left the group. And the other women left to either be with their men or their children.

"Yes." I say, very unsure in my answer.

Vanessa laughs. "You don't sound very confident." She has caught my tone. "I understand though. It has been weird for me when I have gone back up to visit the Makah reservation now. Things have changed and it's just not the same."

I nod my head in agreement as my eyes scan the group. There were many families here, younger families specifically. Sam and his wife, Emily, who I had just met, are included in this group of families. "There are a lot of families." I comment, my eyes watching as Emily bounces the baby softly in her arms as she stands beside her husband who is catching with a group of guys.

Vanessa hums. "It gets annoying at times." She admits. "Seeing people who have their whole life together when it seems like yours is falling apart." She lets out a short laugh. "You will get used to it." Vanessa's attitude and mannerisms remind me a lot of Leah Clearwater, who from the looks of it, is not here.

I scan the crowd again, this time noticing the large number of couples there are. I understood what Vanessa was talking about. It looks like everyone has their lives together. They were either dating, married, or having children. Being single did not appear to be common here. I feel a little out of place.

I have always noticed that people in La Push, and even Forks, seemed to marry earlier. But I didn't think that I would ever feel like at age 23 that I would feel like I am late in the game.

I feel Vanessa pat me on the back and a loud laugh coming from her mouth. "Don't let them get to you." She says as she must have noticed my facial expressions. "There are single people here. We are a little outnumbered but I promise everyone has a good time." She laughs. "They aren't too old and married yet."

I can't help but let out a breathy laugh.

"That's my older brother, Thomas." She says, pointing to one of the guys sitting around the fire. My eyes follow her pointing finger. They both look similar, you could definitely see that they are related. "He is a punk." She chuckles, noticing how he caught his whole dog on fire. His deep belly laugh can be heard all the way over here.

I feel a pair of eyes on me and I look to the man who is sitting a few guys down from Vanessa's older brother. His deep brown eyes seem to capture mine. His mouth is slightly ajar as I take in his face. It is so familiar yet different. His sharp beautiful facial features are stunning. His big muscular body, even more stunning. The brown eyes feel as if they have a physical hold onto mine. As I stare into them, my heart begins to beat a little faster.

"Oh my gosh." I choke out when I realize who I am staring so deeply at.

"That's Seth." Vanessa grumbles, suddenly annoyed beside me. "Fucking asshole." I barely hear her say under her breath. "He's Sue Clearwater's son, I'm not sure that you've met her or not."

"Um, yeah." I say, finally able to pull my eyes from his. I feel like I can finally breathe again. "I was really good friends with Seth and Leah as a child." I say. But damn, Seth did not look like a little kid anymore. I think the last time I saw him he was maybe 14, I was 16 at the time. He still had very child-like features and was nowhere near as tall or as big as he is now. He had always been a cute kid, my mom would always joke that we would get married someday. But he wasn't just a cute kid anymore. He was hot. Like a Greek-god model-like hot that you would see on the cover of some magazine.

Vanessa pulls on my arm, nudging me from my gawking at Seth. "Come on, let's eat before the guys eat all the food." She says as she pulls me toward the fire pit. And towards Seth.

The chapter you have all been waiting for. We get more interaction between Tatum and Seth in the next chapter. Favorite and follow the story so you get notification when I post the next chapter. Also, leave a review and tell me what your favorite part of the story has been so far or what you are looking forward to.

xx M