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"Well, that was one way to use up our vacation!" Nigel dropped their bags in the middle of the room and kicked his shoes off with a content sigh. There was nothing like coming home.

"Hm, what was your favorite part? Getting shot at or an apology replacing the justice system?" Jordan grabbed a beer and plopped on the couch.

"I think my favorite part was Mrs. Avery taking one look at us and declaring, 'not under my roof!' before assigning us rooms on opposite ends of the house." Nigel kissed her on top of the head as he walked by, "I just adore her." He smiled, fond memories playing through his head. He had accompanied Mrs. Avery to the beauty salon, not wanting to leave her alone after the attack, and the ladies had prattled on about everything from his care routine to his knack for sewing to when he might pop the question to the pretty little thing they saw him with around town. They spent a lot of time on that last one, in fact, and were only satisfied when he promised he was going to ask soon.

Jordan took a swig, lost in her thoughts, "I still can't get over it."

"What is there to get over, luv?" He yanked his shirt off and tossed it towards the basket, "Bill and his mum have found their peace, what more could you ask for?"

"Um, truth will out? Some sort of actual recompense?" She suggested. On the flight back, Jordan thought she had come to terms with it. Even though she wanted to see the bastard fry, she couldn't go against Bill and his mother's wishes. After all, it was their right to let the past lie, the wrong was done against them and they had final say. And they had determined an apology was enough. She would just have to accept that, which was much easier said than done.

"It isn't right, it isn't fair, Jo, but it is what it is." Nigel was quiet for a long while, his thoughts turning, "I still can't understand why he did it, why couldn't he just let it be for a while?"

"Who, Bill?" Jordan rolled her eyes, snarkily thinking that 40 years was longer than a while.

"No, his father." Nigel walked out, pulling a fresh shirt on.

Jordan's brow knit, "Yeah, just so you know, I wasn't part of your inner dialogue right then."

"I was just thinking about Bill's father." Nigel futzed with his hair, "Why did he risk it, going to the movies that day? His wife was eight months pregnant; life was finally looking up. The Act had just gone into effect, why did he have to push it so soon? He had to know the risks involved."

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because he had a right to be treated like a human being? Maybe, because those laws were inhumane and bigoted and wrong? Maybe because he knew someone had to be first, someone had to stand up and say, 'screw you all, I'm a human being and I have a right to be here!'"

Jordan's fire was stirred, and Nigel sighed, weighing his options. Flight was looking pretty good right now.

"I'm not saying he was wrong, luv, I was just curious why he didn't think about the bigger picture?"

"Oh, the big picture? Since when is basic human rights not the big picture? Jesus Christ, Nige, he wasn't even allowed to go to the movies because he was black!" Jordan was hot, out for blood, "He was murdered for going to a movie! They tore a family apart in cold blood, they killed a husband and—and a father and—fuck, you don't even have to go that far! They killed a man because of the color of his skin for going to a fucking movie! Where is the justice in that? Bill never should have had to grow up without his father. Daphne never should have had to raise him on her own, they should have grown old together, gotten to celebrate their 50th anniversary together and enjoy their grandchildren, for Christ's sake!"

Nigel grew flustered, his thoughts tied up, "That's what I'm trying to say, why risk so much?"

Her chest heaved, preparing for another wave, "What the hell is wrong with you? God, Nigel—"

"He was a father, Jordan!" Nigel finally snapped, gesturing in a desperate search for words, "He—he had a family, a son, a good life!"

"He wanted more, he deserved more!" Jordan defended, looking for a fight. Her eyes narrowed, her face darkened, daring him to say another word.

Jordan could still hear the glass shattering; she could feel the house shaking from the shots piercing the siding, she could taste the fear in the air. They had only experienced the slightest taste of what hate could look like. She had no concept of what life was like outside of Boston and she hated herself for being so stupid. And that self-hate fueled her anger.

Nigel didn't back down but took great care not to tower over her, desperately trying to not give into her rage, "Yes, and Bill deserved a father!" With a huff, he stepped away, needing to cool off. He took up pacing while she continued to rant, his nails digging into his skull.

"Jordan." He cut her off, his hand steepled against his mouth. She tucked her hands on her hips and begrudgingly nodded for him to go on.

"When you're a father, you have a—a duty to your son, to your wife." Nigel tried, "To provide for them, to protect them—"

"Sexist much?" She crossed her arms, taking whatever digs she could find.

He let it slide, trying to find a way to help her understand, "It isn't just about you anymore. When you hear that heartbeat, when you hold them for the first time, knowing that you are responsible for this little creature, that you're their world and that they depend on you, that they need you, how can you think of yourself anymore?" His voice broke as the emotions caught him; his eyes tear-filled.

Her defenses gave and she dropped her arms, "What—what do you mean?" She looked at him as if she'd never seen him before, and that scared him.

"This whole…whole…thing." He began gesturing again, "It has just got me thinking."

"Thinking about what?"

He looked at her, weighing whether to risk it or not, "About what it means to be a father."

Her eyes grew heavy, feeling the weight of his words.

"It's just…there is a lot that goes into being one." Nigel sighed, taking up the couch.

"And a-are you one?"

His fingers tore through his hair, "One what?"

Jordan swallowed, not sure if she wanted to know the answer, "A father?"

"No, luv." He chuckled. She saw the thought continue in his eyes, maybe one day, though. But he wouldn't say it aloud because he didn't want to scare her.

But that wasn't what scared her, fear took her only when she realized the thought didn't scare her.

She sat beside him, not sure what to say to, let alone think about, his confession.

"Maybe he was doing it for his son?" She finally chanced, "Maybe, he wanted him to be born into a different world."

"I don't doubt that Jordan, I just…I don't know how you decide between your beliefs and your child, between standing up for what is right and your wife." Nigel sighed, his eyes distant, "I—I hope I never have to make a choice like that."

Jordan nodded, his words hitting their mark. There was no doubt in her mind that Bill's father had done what he did to help create a better world for his son. But, at what cost? Nigel had presented an impossible question.

"Me too, Nige." She was lost in her own thoughts, "Me too."

To think the Averys had lived right in the middle of such adversity their whole lives, to think of all they had lost simply for existing, and yet they continue to persevere with such kindness and compassion in spite of such violence and hate. Somehow, they still found the beauty in life, they still managed to see good in the darkest of hearts. That they could extend such abundant mercy blew her mind.

She looked at Nigel, watching him wrestle with the question. Different thoughts played across his face as he desperately searched for an answer.

Maybe the peace Mrs. Avery had found was the answer. Maybe, just maybe, that was what could change the world.

And, one day, maybe, Jordan could see herself raising a kid in such a world.

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