4 / roads
She thinks of winter highways as winterways themselves, each one a Bifrost, roads that will transport her to myriad worlds, anywhere other than Mystic Falls or Whitmore or anywhere she has known vampires to have roamed.
Her friends call repeatedly, with the exception of Caroline. The latest news is that Stefan has also turned his humanity off. They need her help and she wants no part of that. She ponders the ease of turning one's humanity off like a light. She holds this up against the story Kai rambles about her birthday. It was apparently his doing that Jeremy could leave her the hint of a map. He talks about how Liv tried to kill him. What she's stuck on is that, when given the opportunity, he found himself unable to reciprocate.
She can't picture it, but she wants to. To picture him at the crisis of empathy.
The way he talks about it, he sounds frustrated. She can't imagine feeling frustrated about being unable to harm someone. Unless she counts how she feels about him. She knows she can't really kill him, unless she doesn't care about the Gemini deaths that would follow. It scares her, the rage she feels. The want for revenge that burns like alcohol in her chest. It almost confiscates her regard for those other lives. To mortally wound him would satisfy this cold and curling thing inside her. She doesn't recognize herself.
She can hurt him in other ways. Nonfatal wounds. And he has feelings now. Those are so much easier to hurt. She's doing it all the time. That, admittedly, feels a little good.
Kai urges her to ignore the calls and texts from everyone else. He thinks it's time to set, and enforce, boundaries. On this one thing, they agree.