The fight between Vegeta and Skorch was vicious, with neither fighter holding back. However, it was also short, as when Vegeta seemed close to losing, Skorch suddenly stopped. "Wait. What was in that bowl of fruit Chi-Chi brought?" Skorch asked, suddenly stopping dead in his tracks and swaying back and forth, seeming almost queasy.
"…Watermelon. Why?" Vegeta asked, now more confused than anything. He was about to either drop-kick Skorch through the barrier, or blast him with a Final-Flash-Big-Bang-Gallic-Gun combo, but then he saw the almost frightened look in Skorch's eyes sockets.
"Ugh… I… I freakin' hate watermelon…" Skorch moaned, a sickening gurgling sound emanating from him. "Hang on, I need a sec-BBRRRAGGHH!"
With another sickening sound, Skorch violently vomited neon green sludge, it seemed like… like Mountain Dew… onto the ground in front of him. Vegeta jumped back, unsure if this was some sort of attack or not, but after a moment, he realized it wasn't. Skorch was just sick. Really, REALLY, sick.
"Are you o-" He began but was cut off by another violent round of vomiting. Everyone watching was just looking on with no idea of how to react. Aside from a few of them feeling sick… Was this a plan?! A trick?! Did Skorch and Vegeta somehow have this agreement early on?!
"What the hell is he doing?!" Both Beerus and Champa shouted. One in confusion and one in absolute fury.
"Right. He's allergic..." Akira muttered. "Forgot about that."
"Wait, he's… allergic to watermelon!?" No. 18 exclaimed.
"Yes." Akira nodded. "For some reason, watermelon does to him what six bottles of tequila does to a human, minus the fun feeling of being drunk, and straight into the sickness the morning after."
"…uh." Chi-Chi blinked, suddenly remembering something. She had given Universe Six some watermelon, and Skorch had… "Oh."
"Hold up." Goten said. "How is he vomiting? He's living fire!"
As if to raise more questions than answers, Skorch vomited twice more, then weakly reached forward… and then his legs seemed to buckle and give out, resulting in him falling onto his back, moaning weakly. Vegeta blinked, then decided screw it. He grabbed Skorch by the leg and threw him into the air. Charging a Bang Beam, he waited for Skorch to coming in range, then quite literally blew him to pieces, seeing them get scattered in all directions and out of the ring. Skorch made no attempt to fight back, now too sick to even move, and parts of him crashed into the ground and didn't get up.
"Uh… we're gonna need a second folks." The Ref announced, leaving and talking with the others, leaving everyone questioning how this was going to turn out. It took them a minute to figure out if Skorch was alive or not (as he didn't bleed in his skeletal form or have lungs) but when his skull groaned in the hands of a ref, and a dismembered hand raised and flipped everyone off, they had their answer.
"Folks, in a shocking turn of events, Vegeta has defeated Universe Six's Challenger, Skorch!" The ref announced, to loud cheers from Universe Seven's side.
"IMPOSSIBLE!" Champa roared. "YOU CHEATED!"
"The hell are you talking about?" Beerus remarked dismissively. "He ate food from your world and got sick. From a legal standpoint, you poisoned your own fighter!"
"Well, that was unexpected." Roshi muttered.
"We're gonna need ten minutes to clean this up folks…" Someone called as the workers set to scrubbing the foul, neon sludge off of the ring. Everyone else decided to kick back and watch another Death Battle. As the episode began, another notice appeared:
Notice: This episode originally aired in 2012. Since then, there have been many revisions to Pikachu's moves and stats, some of which are accounted for here, but the most recent additions which require a Trainer's Assistance not be used in the battle (Z-Moves, Dynamaxing). However, other aspects such as TM's and HM's will be considered, as while they are technically 'Trainer Assistance' Pokémon don't need a Trainer to perform the moves learned.
"Okay. Whatever that means…" Roshi muttered.
(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)
"When you think of an electric charged combatant, these two always come to mind before anyone else." Wiz began. "Pikachu, Ash's first Pokémon."
A yellow, mouse-like fighter appeared with large ears and a zig-zag tail.
"I get the feeling he's the face of their world." No. 18 said.
"And Blanka, the man-beast of Brazil." Boomstick added. Aa a green-skinned, orange-haired beast of a man appeared, with electricity sparking off of his body.
"I have questions." Goten said.
"He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!"
"And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills, to find out who would win... a Death Battle."
Pikachu
The doors opened revealing Pikachu, the small yellow mouse pokémon was scratching his ear.
"Pika?"
"Aww! He's so cute!" Videl exclaimed.
(*Cues: The Matter's Settled - Pokémon Anime*)
"Standing barely over one foot tall and weighing less than a newborn baby, Pikachu is the quick-footed electric mouse Pokémon, and the face of the franchise for the past twenty-five years. He's he first under the command of Ash, a ten-year-old trainer from Pallet Town… because you don't need puberty to travel the world by yourself." Wiz began.
"Wait, what?" Goku blinked. "Who lets a kid travel the world on their own when they're ten!?"
"Goku…" Bulma began.
"They should at least have someone like Piccolo watching their back!"
"…I agree." The scientist paused then answered.
"Is this like, a religious thing or a traditional thing?" Hercule asked. "Is this something they can do to make a living?"
PIKACHU
- Height: 0.4 m / 1'4"
- Weight: 6.0 kg / 13.2 lbs
- Ability: Static (May Paralyze Attacking Opponents)
- PokéDex Number: 25
- Dislikes His Pokéball
- Likes Ketchup and Coffee
- Can Absorb and Use More Electric Power Than a Normal Pikachu
- Sometimes A Detective
- Time Magazine Listed Him As The 4th Most Recognizable Video Game Character
"While Pikachu is now Ash's most loyal and trusted companion, he sure didn't start that way. He was actually, kind of a dick." Boomstick began. Then again, if a ten-year-old was trying to trap me in a tiny ball and make me fight other creatures to the death, I'd probably fuck him up too…"
Ash was walking down a path, literally dragging Pikachu behind him on a leash.
"I mean, they're animals." Bulma shrugged. "I doubt most animals are going to immediately follow you or bond with you just because."
"Being so small, Pikachu has low stamina and physical strength, but more than makes up for it with speed. However, his EV training was arbitrary and inconsistent…"
"EV-what now?"
"Effort Value training. Every time a Pokémon wins a battle, one of its abilities improve depending upon the opponent."
"So, it's kinda like power levels?"
"Yeah, they mentioned that during the starter battle." Supreme Kai nodded.
"Taking the first seasons of the show into account, we have compiled an estimation of Pikachu's statistics upon reaching his maximum level. By defeating so many Spearow's this early on, Pikachu's speed is off the charts!"
(*Cues: Pokémon - Champion Red Remix*)
"The little lightning rat isn't just quick. He's got two incredibly powerful weapons built into his face! Those aren't just rosy cheeks, they're electricity sacks, which he uses for attacks like his trademark Thunderbolt, and when that won't do the trick, he can use the extra-fast Quick Attack to surprise his foes, or Iron Tail, which turns his tail hard as steel, and can somehow decrease the opponents attack."
STATISTICS
- HP: 182 = Below Average
- Attack: 144 = Average
- Defense: 108 = Below Average
- Sp. Attack: 123 = Average
- Sp. Defense: 80 = Below Average
- Speed: 291 = Above Average
"Hey, they mentioned all this stuff mattered when the two fighters were Pokémon, would any of this affect a non-Pokémon?" Goten asked, raising a good point.
"Huh… if I had to guess, this is more of a general overlook on Pikachu's end. This stuff might be more to do with comparing general stats." Kibito shrugged. "By that I mean I don't really know."
"Because this is just how Pokémon works… But for a real punch, Electro Ball is a projectile that, for some reason, deals more damage the slower an opponent is. Thunderwave is a low damage attack, but can paralyze an opponent, leaving them immobile. When he needs to make a big splash, he'll unleash his charged-up power with Discharge!" Wiz continued. "And those are the attacks he can learn by himself. When given a TM, a Technical Machine, Pikachu can immediately learn a new move. Through them, he's learned attacks such as Thunder Punch, an electrically charged beat down."
MOVE SET
THUNDERBOLT
- Type: Electric (Special Attack)
10% Chance of Paralyzing Target
THUNDER
- Type: Electric (Special Attack)
- 30% Chance of Paralyzing Target
- Low Accuracy
QUICK ATTACK
- Type: Normal (Physical Attack)
- Increased Priority Over Opponent's Attack
IRON TAIL
- Type: Steel (Physical Attack)
- 10% Chance of Lowering Target Defenses
ELECTRO BALL
- Type: Electric (Special Attack)
- Deals More Damage to Slower Enemies
VOLT TACKLE
- Type: Electric (Physical Attack)
- Deals 33% Recoil Damage to Pikachu
- 10% Chance of Paralyzing Target
THUNDER PUNCH
- Type: Electric (Physical Attack)
- 10% Chance of Paralyzing Target
DISCHARGE
- Pikachu Unleashes All his Stored-Up Energy
- This Attack Damages All Pokémon on the Field
"But when things get serious, Pikachu'll bust out his greatest attack. The Volt Tackle." Boomstick said.
(*Cues – Game On – Detective Pikachu Soundtrack)
"Okay… let's do this Pokémon battle thing right!" Pikachu said, speaking in a voice that sounded WAY off for his design. Before anyone could question what was happening, Pikachu took off running, a cone of electrically charged power surrounding him. He seemed to be drawing upon the energy from the building itself as he charged towards a floating pokémon, one that looked like a mixture of a human, and a cat. Punch jumped, flying through an attack by the other pokémon that seemed somewhat Ki-like, and struck him in the chest, sending him flying into a building.
"That's pretty cool." Trunks said. "I wonder if you could do something like that with Ki…"
"Maybe, but the issue would be having that energy in front of you while you're moving, and not having it kill you." Roshi nodded. "If you try and run and Kamehameha in the same direction, there's a good chance you'll either incinerate yourself, or be thrown back by the force of the attack."
"Volt Tackle strikes with the force of a mouse-powered megaton warhead, but there's a catch… Pikachu receives recoil damage equaling 33% of the total damage dealt. This move cannot be used lightly, and usually is only used as a last resort, or a pseudo-non-lethal finishing move." Wiz explained, pointing out a pretty big issue with it.
(*Cues: Pokémon - Gotta Catch 'Em All (Orchestra Version)*)
"Well that's dumb. It's like, "Hey I can kill you, but I'm gonna blow off my arm!" Still… there's a lot of attacks in the Pokémon pantheon that do damage to the pokémon… so hey. That's just how it goes I guess."
"…Yeah…" Goku and Vegeta both muttered under their breath or coughed into their hand. Both deciding to not comment or bring up past events.
"That's kinda weird…" Ash commented.
"And since the little dude is practically made of electricity, you can bet your ass he can use it in more ways than one! He can and can summon a lightning strike from the sky with Thunder! Which somehow doesn't hurt him…"
"Thunder really seems to be an effective weapon."
"Regardless, Ash's Pikachu is astounding. He's like a living battery, weaponized. Not only can he discharge an enormous amount of power, he can also absorb electricity and use it against his foes. In fact, he can conduct more wattage than any normal Pikachu, making him one of the toughest of his kind."
FEATS
- Strong Against Flying & Water Goes
- Developed Thunder Armor Move
- Developed Counter Shield Move
- Developed Spin Dodge
- Beat Drake's Dragonite With Help
- Defeated Brandon's Regice With Help
- Has Saved The World More Than Once
- Team Rocket's Nightmare
"Do you think it'd be possible to use Pikachu to generate power? Like some sort of power generator?" Bulma asked.
"Actually, in some regions in the Pokémon universe, Power Plants are being constructed which run exclusively on a group of Pikachu's conducting abilities." Wiz added.
"Oh."
"Yeah, but he's got his limits, get too much electricity stored up and BOOM! No more Pikachu. On top of that, he's weak to dragon-type pokémon, and is practically useless against ground-type pokémon."
"Why ground?" Kibito asked. "With Charizard, Venusaur and Blastoise, it made sense… Fire, grass and water all counter each other… is it because rocks don't conduct electricity or something?"
"Probably, yeah." Roshi nodded. "Seems like the kinda logic they'd use. But it makes me wonder… would they be effective against metal types? Actually… are there metal types?"
"Yes." The Entity's voice spoke in Roshi's head.
"The flying aspect makes sense, thunder hitting a bird? That won't end well."
"Aside from Death Battles, do Pokémon… y'know… kill each other?" Goku asked. "When they're throwing attacks like this at each other, wouldn't that kill them?"
"…huh. Good question." Krillin nodded. "I think they just pass out, but I dunno." Suddenly, a paper airplane hit him. Blinking in confusion, he looked at it and read the note to himself.
In the games/anime, they usually fight until they get 'knocked out'. In a Japanese manga, they kill each other. VIOLENTLY. Like, decapitations, being frozen and shattered and even become zombies. Yes. Really. Don't tell the kids, let them enjoy it as what it is.
"Oof…" He muttered, passing the note to No. 18 who read it in surprise, then passed it to Bulma, who read it and passed it to Hercule and so on. Needless to say, it was surprising…
"Weird fact, actually. Charizard isn't a dragon-type pokémon…" Boomstick commented.
"Wait, what?!" Was collectively exclaimed.
"He's literally a dragon! How is he not a dragon-type!?" Hercule asked.
"He's a fire-flying type, but gains the 'dragon' classification when he becomes Mega Charizard X."
"…but he's LITERALLY A DRAGON!" Old Kai protested in disbelief.
"It's true. Pikachu is still a tiny mouse Pokémon with very clear limits. And even though he has long since reached his maximum potential, he refuses to evolve into the vastly superior Raichu due to some pretentious excuse of love and acceptance..." Wiz explained as Pikachu was shown, and then a chubbier, orange Pikachu with a bigger tail and yellow-ears was shown next to him. "What a waste of potential, can you imagine how powerful he could be as a Raichu?"
"I'm with Wiz, why would Pikachu not want to be stronger?" Vegeta asked.
"Yeah, but Pikachu's more marketable." Boomstick reasoned.
"I'll have to agree with Boomstick on that one." Yamcha nodded. "In terms of recognizability? There's something about Pikachu's simplistic design that… works."
"Yeah, but… forget it." Vegeta muttered. To him, that was the equivalent of choosing not to go beyond Super Sayian, when you were fully aware of Super Sayian Blue, or Super Sayian God. It just… it didn't make sense! Then again, this was a tiny electrical rat, so it probably wasn't the smartest to begin with.
"But hey, Pikachu's accomplished quite a lot of impressive feats on his own. He's beaten legendary Pokémon and developed new fighting techniques like the Counter Shield and Midair Spin Dodge. He may be the size of a squirrel, but he's one tough fighter!"
(*Cues – The Roadhouse – Detective Pikachu Soundtrack)
Pikachu was standing in the center of what looked like a cage ring, and seemed to be straining audibly, while everyone else looked to one another in confusion.
"Hey bud? What are you doing!?" A teen asked nervously.
"I… I can't do it when people are watching…" Pikachu muttered. Without warning, a realistic Charizard smashed through the other side of the ring and roared. As it unleashed a stream of fire into the air. Those watching realized two things: one, a realistic Charizard looked BADASS! And two, a realistic Charizard also looked TERRIFYING. Pikachu seemed to realize this as he whirled around and seemed both angry and terrified. "GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"
"…I don't know why, but him saying that feels wrong on many levels." No. 18 commented with a slight shake of her head.
The doors closed, and Yamcha paused the video.
"Between this, and the trio from that triple-fight, I feel like I have more questions than answers." Jaco said aloud. "Thing is, I kinda want answers, because this world seems fascinating!"
"Agreed." Piccolo nodded, noting that when this was over (and he wasn't going to throw up on them) there were a few things they wanted Skorch to explain, even if a fight was required.
"I still like Bulbasaur more." Videl shrugged. "Pikachu's cute, but there's something about Bulbasaur I just like more."
"Charizard's still the best out of all of them." Goten said as if no one could argue that fact.
In order to get ready for the battle against Hit, Vegeta decided to skip the second half of the battle and get warmed up. If need be, he could re-watch it later, right now, he needed to focus.
Blanka
(*Cues: Blanka's theme - Metal Cover*)
"As a child, Jimmy Blanka was a pale-skinned Brazilian boy. He had a relatively normal life, living with his parents, and generally having an uneventful childhood. That is, until he was caught in a horrific plane crash..." Wiz began, the story going from 0-100 in no time.
"Like 'Lost'!" Boomstick cut in.
"What?" Was collectively asked.
"It's… it was a show, it was okay." Genevieve shrugged. "Great concept, then the last two seasons got so confusing even those that followed it from day one admitted they couldn't tell what was happening anymore."
"…Of which he was the sole survivor, stranded in the Amazon. Trapped in an area filled with dangerous predators, he was forced to camouflage himself day and night. After many years of this, his skin absorbed enough chlorophyll to turn a permanent green hue." Wiz concluded.
BACKGROUND
- Height: 1.92 m / 6'3.5"
- Wight: 98 kg / 217 lbs
- Real name: James "Jimmy"
- Nationality: Brazil
- Hobbies: Hunting, Electrical Work
- Hates Army Ants With A Passion
- Previously Pale Skinned
- Friends With Dan and Sakura
- Survived in the Amazon Jungle For Years
"Really? I always thought he was just some kind of jungle-monster-beast-guy… Wasn't he like, a drunk mad scientists' lab experiment or something?!" Boomstick asked. "Or am I forgetting the movie again?"
"No, well… okay no." Wiz remarked. "It's easy to believe into that misconception due to his name and appearance, but in the 1994 Street Fighter movie, Blanka was technically two characters. Charlie – who wasn't yet a playable character in the Street Fighter franchise – and then… Blanka. Instead of being a Brazilian boy lost in the jungle, he was a solider and friends with Guile, who got kidnapped and experimented on by Shadaloo, turning him into the Blanka-esque character seen towards the end."
"Coulda fooled me." Yamcha shrugged. "Is your skin changing colour like that possible?"
"Actually… kinda." Bulma remarked, which surprised those watching. "Chlorophyll and carotenoids are located in plastids and the phenolic pigments in someone's skin colour, and commonly found in plants. Wherein pigment accumulation or loss can lead to floral color change, which by those outlines, human skin could potentially change in a similar way. I can't say how long you would need to effectively be covered or surrounded by plant life, or what type for that matter, but someone's skin changing colours due to extreme amounts of biochromic absorption and adaptation isn't outside the possibility of reality."
"…what?" Someone finally asked after about ten seconds of silence.
"Ugh. If he was living in the jungle without any sort of shelter, and was concealing himself in plants for a long time, then yeah. His skin might change like that. There's a lot more to it, but-"
"Okay, plants plus sun equals change in skin colour. Good to know." Roshi cut her off, earning a low growl from the scientist.
"So… he is… but he isn't." Boomstick said, thinking it over. "Of course!"
"Despite his appearance, Blanka is actually extremely passive and gentle. Often remaining on the sidelines and trying to avoid conflict unless absolutely necessary. However, piss him off and he enters an unstoppable bloodlust, wherein he is capable of ripping a regular man in half."
"Well, that seems like a pretty drastic change." Boomstick muttered.
"Yeah…"
"Makes sense." Piccolo nodded. "He spent so long in the jungle trying to survive, his humanity probably waned somewhat, but somewhere in his mind, he's still a kid. So that fear and apprehension towards violence probably comes from that."
"But before he was old enough to fight the predators himself, he was forced to live off electric eels as his primary food source." Wiz continued as a young boy was shown ripping apart an eel and consuming its insides. "After years of this diet, he developed a high resistance to electricity and somehow gained the ability to produce similar electric shocks."
Blanka grunted, growling in pain as his body seemed to be twitching and jittering around. Without warning, his hair seemed to be conducting electricity between them. He growled in a mixture of pain and confusion, and the electricity began coursing around his body, seemingly being absorbed into him.
"That looks painful…" Hercule winced.
"Well his body probably had to change on a genetic level, that much shift without warning would be a real issue…" No. 18 nodded.
Blanka's cries became more and more animalistic, and seemed to be less of pain, and more of anger. The energy was generating faster and faster, now conducting at a clearly unsafe level. Lightning was sparking off of his body, and his hair began to change, becoming a much deeper orange than it already was. With a predatory roar, Blanka slammed the ground, and a massive shockwave of electricity exploded outwards, electrifying the surrounding foliage, incinerating leaves, burning trees, and shocking a nearby lake. After a few moments, dozens of fish and eels floated to the surface, either stunned or dead.
"Be right back! Getting eels!" Boomstick declared.
"No, Boomstick. It doesn't work like that. Plus, we kind of have a show to do." Wiz muttered.
"Fine, but afterwards, I'm proving you wrong!"
"Before you ask. No." Bulma immediately said. "Eating electric eels doesn't give you electrical powers."
"Okay. Fine. Sure." Wiz rolled his eyes as Blanks was shown finally leaving the jungle and making his way towards a nearby town. "Blanka eventually found his way to civilization by complete accident, and found a friend by complete accident. In Dan Hibiki. The absolute worst Street Fighter on earth…"
"Ah, Dan. Couldn't get any real people friends, so you had to resort to jungle Frankenstein over here." Boomstick muttered.
"Now I feel even worse for Blanka…" Tien said, and there was general agreement.
"After arriving in the city, Blanka entered the second World Warrior Tournament, and discovered he was one of the most agile competitors there, leaping and ducking around his opponents with ease, like a jungle monkey, which is basically what he is. Just one who can create lightning-based attacks and stuff." Wiz explained as Blanka was seen fighting against Ryu, jumping around the arena with a surprising amount of finesse.
"He uses a self-taught martial art, which he learned while fighting...against what? Friggin' crocodiles and jaguars, that's what!" Boomstick continued as Blanka grabbed onto a crocodile and seemed to flip backwards into the nearby water, fighting over what looked like the remains of an animal.
"Crocs can be way tougher than you'd think." Roshi commented as he watched the struggle. "I've dealt with a number of em'… and they're really annoying unless you take them down quickly."
"Blanks has several unique attacks, like the Beast Roll, with which he hurdles through the air like a bullet, obliterating all laws of physics. But considering some of the crap that's happened in the Street Fighter canon? That's pretty minor." Wiz said as Blanka executed his Beast Roll attack
"What's he getting at?" Old Kai asked.
"One of the first battles we watched had a guy from this world who destroyed an entire island with a single punch, and could become a literal Raging Demon with a move called Instant Hell Murder." Piccolo answered, calling back to when they watched Akuma and Shang Tsung go at it, while it hadn't even been a full year since they started watching these… it sure felt like it! His explanation surprised those who hadn't been present.
"Yeah… Akuma was a freaky dude…" Goten nodded.
MOVE SET
- Amazon River Run
- Rock Crusher
- Electric Thunder
- Beast Roll
- Vertical Beast Roll
- Backstep Beast Roll
SUPER MOVES
GRAND SHAVE ROLL ("That might be one of the worst attack names I have ever heard…" Krillin said. "Agreed." Kibito nodded.)
- Chargeable Spin Attack
SHOUT OF EARTH
- Can Electrify The Ground or Shoot A Bolt of Lightning Straight Up ("Because of course it can." Bulma muttered.)
LIGHTNING CANNONBALL
- Ultra-Fast Electric Spin Attack
V-TRIGGER MOVES
Jungle Dynamo
- Super-Charges Lightning Cannonball
- Electric Beast
- Super-Charges Lightning Cannonball Knocks Opponent Into the Air, Strikes Repetitively
"I dunno which jaguar or crocodile taught him that move, but shit, I WANT IT!" Boomstick stated matter-of-factly. A few of the fighters nodded, questioning if a move like that was possible… "Those moves aside, he's also got a few super moves. The Ground Shave Roll is a chargeable spin attack, letting him pull a 1.12 gigawatts Sonic Spin, and with Shout of Earth Blanka can fire off a wave of uncontrollable electric energy, literally turning the floor into an electrified trap! But you really gotta watch out for the Lightning Cannonball, where he rockets forward as spinning ball of electric death.
Blanka shot forward, hitting another man with the Lightning Cannonball.
"K.O.!" The Announcer declared.
"And in more recent years, Blanka's gotten some new 'V-Trigger' moves. Despite how dumb that sounds, these two attacks allow Blanka to uber-charge his Lightning Cannonball, and should he go all-out, he's somehow able to effectively homing attack the enemy without them being able to block it!"
"Because what good is a super-powerful attack, if you can't make it even MORE super powerful?" Boomstick asked rhetorically.
"That's a fair point." Goku nodded.
"Blanka is a deadly fighter and obviously an extremely tough survivor. However, his greatest weakness comes from his lack of formal training. In fact, the only training he's ever had was under the tutelage of... guess..."
"Don't say it..." Boomstick and most of those watching groaned.
"Dan Hibiki."
"That's like, anti-training!" Boomstick exclaimed in disgust.
"Sorry, are we missing something?" Kibito asked, looking to the others. "They really seem to hate whoever this 'Dan' guy is.
"They do. And with good reason." No. 18 said dryly.
"He's… honestly, he's a joke. That's all there is too it." Yamcha nodded. "The dude never won a fight in his life, was just… unbelievably incompetent, and somehow screwed up a literal one-shot move… because he's Dan."
"Eesh… what loser did they put him against?"
"Me." Hercule said flatly, and immediately Kibito looked away awkwardly.
"Who won?"
"Me." Hercule nodded with a satisfactory grin.
"Nice." Supreme Kia nodded.
"It actually was a pretty decent fight." Yamcha added. "Despite Dan being… Dan. They had a pretty good battle until Hercule won. Admittedly due to Dan being Dan, but still."
WEAKNESSES
- Preferably Docile
- Susceptible to Cold ("Fair." Videl shrugged.)
- Never Won A Tournament ("And?" Tien asked.)
- Only Formal Training Came From Dan Hibiki ("Great…" Someone muttered)
"And yet, he has proven his combat skills time and time again. Though he did not win the World Warrior Tournament, he was picked from hundreds to represent Brazil." Wiz explained.
"What's the World Warrior Tournament?" Trunks asked.
"If I had to guess, it's pretty much the World Championship… but in their world." Piccolo shrugged.
FEATS
- Grew Up Alone in the Amazon (A few of the fighters kinda felt bad for him because of that… living alone, literally becoming a monster and never knowing your family? That just sounded rough, buddy…)
- Honed Skills Against Predators (No, not the cool space ones)
- Represented Brazil in the Second World Warrior Tournament
- Found His Long-Lost Family (That surprised some of those watching)
- Local Hero
- Immune to Most Viruses (2020 Would Like A Word)
"…and through it, rediscovered his mother and hometown. At long last, Blanka had come home." Wiz concluded.
"It… It can't…" A woman spoke in a shocked voice as she looked at Blanka, who was looking at her, clearly trying to figure out where he knew her from. "Jimmy?"
Blanka took a step back, that name clearly not having been spoken for some time. He looked around, almost in a panic, then saw a picture on the wall, a small boy and his parents.
"..M..Mama?" Blanka finally got out.
"Jimmy! My boy is alive!" Blanka's mother exclaimed, hugging her son who seemed frightened by the sudden contact but then realized who she was.
"Mama!"
"My boy… my baby boy finally came home…"
"Aww… that's sweet." Chi-Chi smiled, remembering the times when Goku had returned either from long stints in training, or from the dead. Admittedly, that second thing was something no one should ever have to experience… but she knew her life wasn't like most others.
"Most terrifying family reunion ever." Boomstick commented.
"Thank you for ruining that." She grumbled.
Blanka was shown playing and jumping around with children while he laughs.
"Huh, I guess that proves it then." Ryu commented.
"Proves what?" A younger girl in a school uniform asked.
"Even in a Beast, the heart of a man still beats." Ryu commented as the doors closed. The video was paused, and everyone looked to one another.
"I want to say Pikachu will win… but honestly I'm pretty sure Blanka's gonna win." Goku stated. "He just seems way more powerful than Pikachu."
"Yeah, in size alone he's WAY stronger!" Goten agreed.
"Sure, but Pikachu's got speed and attacks which Blanka's never seen before." Videl countered. "And if it comes down to power output, Pikachu was born to generate and discharge electricity, Blanka adapted to it over a long period of time."
"She has a point." Kibito nodded.
"Yeah, sorry. I don't see Pikachu winning." Krillin shook his head. "Most likely he'll get overcharged by Blanka and explode or something like that."
This was another… interesting fight. Those watching liked both fighters; Pikachu was, for lack of a better term, adorable! But also seemed to be able to pack a punch and hold his own in a brawl, while Blanka was an interesting case. On the surface, he seemed like a monster… but he was clearly so much more than that. He still seemed to be capable of speech and of feeling emotions. He also was clearly capable of kicking ass when he needed too – his questionable trainer aside – it was hard to say who would win for sure, but there was a pretty even split.
Pikachu: Videl, Tien, Chi-Chi, Roshi, Old Kai, Trunks, Bulma, Kibito, No. 18
Blanka: Goku, Piccolo, Hercule, Goten, Marron, Yamcha, Krillin, Supreme Kai, Jaco
Death Battle
(*Cues: Pokémon - Lance Battle Final (Remastered)*)
Blanka appeared, running through the jungle, looking for… something. He launched himself off of a tree and flew through the air. It's not clear what he's looking for until he skids to a stop and looks down. In front of him, a common Pokéball sits on the forest floor. Blanka reaches forward and taps it, causing it to open. Blanka jumped back in shock as Pikachu looked around in confusion, then looked at Blanka.
"Pika… Pika?"
FIGHT!
"Wait, they're not even giving a real reason as to why they're fighting?" Videl asked.
"Eh, guess not." Roshi shrugged.
Blanka attacks Pikachu and knocks him backwards. Pikachu then jumps back and attacks him with a Thunderbolt, but no dice. The two attacked each other quickly, but nothing seemed to be too effective as the electrical bursts seemed to waver off after they collided.
"Not good enough!" Blanka snarled.
"Pika, pika!" Pikachu retorted, charging up an electro ball and blasting it at Blanka. The Brazilian beast blinked in surprise, then yelled in annoyance when the ball of energy struck him. The electricity didn't seem to harm him too much, but the force did.
Blanka attacks Pikachu with a Beast Roll, and knocks the electric mouse out of the air and down to the ground, but Pikachu quickly gets back on its feet and charges at Blanka with a Quick Attack, flying by him numerous times and then hitting him head on. Everything froze, then a shockwave shot out, electrifying the trees and burning their leaves.
"That looks cool…" Marron blinked.
Pikachu followed it up by quickly jumping back into the air, and starting to spin as he hit Blanka in the head with an Iron Tail. Blanka roars and slashes at Pikachu with his claws, but Pikachu ducked and weaved about the attack, striking Blanka underneath his chest before yelling: "PIKA!" And brought down a massive thunderbolt onto Blanka. The attack connected with Blanka, and he roared, but only seemed to power up the Beast-fighter.
"Huh… doesn't seem like either fighter is doing much damage." Goku muttered. Blanka snarled and seemed to be charging up an attack, and slammed his fists on the ground, Pikachu jumped back and began evading the sudden explosions of electricity. Pikachu dashed around Blanka, before coming running back in and jumping, punching Blanka in the face with a Thunder Punch. Before Blanka could get back on his feet, Pikachu used quick attack again, darting around and hitting Blanka in the back. Where electrical attacks didn't seem to work, Pikachu now decided to try physical attacks. Blanka back-handed Pikachu, and scraped the ground, as if issuing a challenge. Jumping into a ball, Blanka shot forward towards Pikachu, who saw the incoming attack… and ducked. Due to his small size, Blanka missed completely. In fact, he missed… three times in a row.
"Do you think Blanka knows what's happening? Or…" Yamcha asked, watching the Brazilian Beast fly back and forth, as Pikachu remained low to the ground.
"I dunno it's hard to- HOLY CRAP." Krillin began but was cut off when Pikachu's tail glowed a hot-white, and he swiped his iron tail upwards, colliding with the flying Blanka and sending him careening into a tree. "Wow. Didn't think it was that powerful…"
"I don't think it did much damage, but it certainly was a good deterrent." Bulma reasoned.
Blanka grabbed the small thunder mouse and began to roll him backwards to throw him into the air, only for Blanka to quickly get back down onto all fours and launched himself into the air. The pair began exchanging electrical blows above the ground, their attacks seemingly countering each other. After a few moments, gravity kicked in again. However, just before Pikachu hits the ground, Blanka uses his Electric Thunder move to attack Pikachu, but Pikachu retaliates with a Thunder attack.
(*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Survive the Jungle (Blanka's Theme)*)
In the resulting explosion, Blanka was knocked backwards, while Pikachu lands on his feet, and quickly follows it up with another Thunderbolt. It was clear that rather than use the thunder itself, Pikachu was trying to use the explosions to hurt Blanka. but Blanka simply blocks the attack again and charged at Pikachu with another Beast Roll. Pikachu charges at him as well, but uses the midair spin dodge technique to go right by him.
"Uh… did he…"
Blanka stops rolling, wondering where his opponent went as Pikachu charges up and fires an Electro Ball. Blanka looks through his legs behind him, only to get hit by the attack and thrown to the ground.
"Never mind."
"I can't tell if Pikachu is actually a decent strategist, or just wildly lucky." Jaco commented.
"I think it's the latter." Yamcha shrugged.
"Still, Blanka doesn't seem to be any worse for wear." Goten commented.
Roaring like an unleashed beast, Blanka slammed the ground once more, unleashing the Shout of Earth as the ground around Pikachu seemed to shatter and crumble away. Pikachu looked around, then blasted a tree at its base, cutting clean through the wood and creating an impromptu bridge. Blanka roared and lurched forward, grabbing onto the tree and clawing at Pikachu.
"PIKACHU!" The tiny pokémon bellowed, and unleashed a massive blast of stored-up electricity directly into Blanka's face with another Thunder Punch. While the Street Fighter was generally immune to electrical attacks, he wasn't immune to fists. The blow, charged with electricity, sent him flying back down to the ground, and Pikachu followed after him.
(*Cues: Burning Battlefield - Pokémon Anime*)
Pikachu gives a peace sign as Blanka jumps back up and growled, summoning all his electrical energy he could, and began to spin, faster and faster before he launched himself forward like a rocket, flying towards Pikachu with a Lightning Cannonball. Pikachu, however, didn't seem ready to back down. The tiny pokémon started running, a cone of electrical energy surrounding it as it did so. It was clear that this was it; whoever came out on top of this impact would most likely be the winner. On the one side, there was Blanka, going full Electrical Beast, and on the other side was Pikachu, using everything he had in one last Volt Tackle. They collided and seemed to be in a struggle a few of the Sayians he been in before. The raw electrical power seemed to be almost paralyzing them both as it seemed to now be nothing but a battle of wills.
"C'mon Pikachu!" Videl exclaimed.
"Kick his ass Blanka!" Someone retorted.
The camera zooms in to see both Pikachu and Blanka firmly keeping their attacks going. It seemed like they were almost in a stale mate. Suddenly, Pikachu seemed to be generating more energy! Those rooting for the small pokémon watched with anticipation as Pikachu seemed to be calling upon every last volt of power he had in his body to-
CRUNCH!
In a move that no one saw coming, and genuinely left everyone speechless, Blanka grabbed Pikachu… and bit his head off. The group went dead silent, staring in mute horror at Blanka, chewing and swallowing the head of Pikachu, holding the decapitated, bleeding body in one hand. There were a few shocked stuttered breaths, but no one knew how to react… to make matters worse, Blanka pulled out a blender and shoved the rest of Pikachu's body in it, along with some dragon fruit. Using his powers, he powered the blender up and pureed the corpse and fruit, shotgunning it like a forty-ouncer. Blanka belched (with a few sparks in it), and then starts scratching his chin.
K.O.!
Results
(*Cues: Pitch-Black Jungle - Street Fighter IV*)
"I…I…but…"
"He just… dude…"
"He… I mean… that…"
Roshi tried to hold back laughter, but eventually gave up and gave into complete hysterics. A few looked to him in confusion, and most in disgust as his laughter spread to a few others. The general consensus was that they were laughing due to how sudden, shocking (lol) and unexpected it had been.
"You know, I've always wanted to eat a Pokémon." Boomstick commented as if this was completely normal and sane rationale.
"DUDE!" Goten exclaimed in disgust.
"What? They look delicious!"
"That is something I never needed to hear in my life…" Chi-Chi muttered. Compared to the other battles it wasn't… the goriest, but there was something about Pikachu just… getting EATEN like that which left a very uncomfortable feeling amongst the group. Also, they were disappointed because Blanka had won.
"Gross, Stick…" Wiz muttered. "Pikachu may be powerful, but he just can't compete with Blanka's ruthless skill."
"Even though Pikachu was clearly quicker on his feet, his attacks had little effect. Blanka can resist the electric attacks, and the Iron Tail's a steel-type move, which, as we all know, is weak against electricity. Pikachu's only option was to outmatch Blanka's physical strength and stamina, which was just too much for the little guy. Sure, he could've tried to overcharge Blanka, or hit him with enough power to burn him, but Blanka's fought guys like M. Bison, who weaponize SOULS."
"Wait. There's ANOTHER guy who weaponizes souls?!" Goku exclaimed. "How many is that at this point?!"
"Too many." Piccolo said flatly.
"And despite keeping a clear head, Pikachu rarely shows any exemplary competence or aptitude on his own. Many of his greatest achievements are actually a result of his trainer's quick thinking, downright luck, or due to him being fused with an adult man." Wiz added, effectively ending anyone's counter-arguments.
"Now I'd like to see what happens when there's a trainer involved." Old Kai commented. "If they're a key to victory, then who knows how this could've ended…"
"Everything was going well, until Pikachu lost his head." Boomstick said, earning a few disgusted groans.
"The winner, is Blanka." Wiz concluded. With that, the episode was done, and the next fight was about to begin! The group made their way back to the bleachers to watch the mysterious 'Hit' vs Vegeta.
"So. You're Hit?" Vegeta remarked, quirking a brow at the silent newcomer. "Hm. Can't say you're what I expected."
"What did you expect?" Hit asked, his tone calm, low and hard to discern.
"More." Vegeta shrugged.
The fight began with Vegeta dashing forward, coming in as he usually did, fast, abrasive, and aggressive. Hit… just stood there. For half a second, Vegeta was left confused, but then that was replaced by the drive for victory. But just as Vegeta was about to strike Hit… He struck first. Vegeta was knocked back and grunted in disbelief. That… how did he do that!? Hit didn't even move!
"How… how is Hit doing that!?"
Vegeta powered up into Super Sayian Blue. However, Hit still didn't seem even slightly concerned. Vegeta attacked again, and Hit stuck him again… Vegeta attacked, Hit countered. It didn't seem possible!
"How can Hit do that?! Is he even moving?!" Trunks shouted. To those watching, Hit wasn't moving. He was just… standing there, and then BOOM! He had hit Vegeta!
"Hey, Jaco. Can you see Hit moving?" Goku asked, appearing next to the patrolman.
"No." He muttered, shocking everyone. "He starts to move, and then… disappears."
Hit wasn't backing down in his fight. Against Majin Buu, he had surprisingly not needed to do too much to win, but it was clear Vegeta wasn't going to hold back. Hit was surprised by Vegeta's Super Sayian Blue form, but even with that, it wasn't enough to pose any real challenge… Vegeta came in for another quick strike, a move which even without his time skip ability, Hit could've easily avoided. It was predictable and repetitive, two qualities Vegeta appeared to have without him knowing. As if to further prove this, Vegeta got overconfident and Hit exploited that. Vegeta found himself being pushed back, and then thrown into the air. Then, no matter what the Sayian Prince did, Hit seemed to know where he'd be, or what he'd be trying to do.
"This style seems… old." Hit thought as he avoided another attack. "But I cannot say if it's outdated…"
Vegeta… felt nothing. He was pissed off, so unimaginably furious with the enemy who stood before him, that he couldn't even feel anything right now. He had hit him, with everything he had… and yet Hit still stood. In that moment, Vegeta no longer cared what it would take, he didn't care what he would have to do, how hard he would have to train, but he wouldn't lose to Hit, no. Forget Hit. He wouldn't lose to ANYONE ever. Again. He felt something deep, deep within him crack, and that split in two like an egg, a new energy seeping through his body. At first, he thought the Entity was cheating to help him, but if that was the case, why was Vegeta even MORE pissed off than he already was!? A dark red energy seemed to seep out of the air around him, as Vegeta focused, aimed everything, and latched onto this power, refusing to let go.
"What's he doing!?" Bulma asked, concerned.
"I have no idea…" Krillin muttered.
"Whis, you don't think Vegeta has achieved…" Beerus began, but Whis shook his head.
"No, Lord Beerus. That type of energy would be quite different, this feels… wrong. But I can't say I've ever seen anything like it before."
"What the hell?" Skorch muttered, watching from the stands. He looked around, then when he was sure no-one was looking, he turned to ash.
Skorch re-appeared behind Hit, concealing himself in a spectrum of light that no-one would be able to see… and he studied Vegeta. Something seemed… wrong. VERY WRONG. This was a new energy coming off of the Sayian warrior, and even Hit seemed taken aback, confused or uncertain as to what might be happening. This didn't make any sense! Goku hadn't hit that Ultra-thing… so how could Vegeta?! But then, Vegeta's eyes changed… red… and a Kanji briefly flashed in front of him. One Skorch recognized from one of the earliest Death Battles, even before he arrived.
"Holy crap…" He muttered. "He… he can't… he can't be tapping into..."
Hit heard someone whisper two words behind him, and knew this wasn't good. He didn't care what happened next, he just acted…
…and before anyone could blink, Vegeta was on the ground.
"Killing is against the rules, right?" Hit asked looking to the ref who despite clearly having seen some unbelievable stuff thus far, was now more terrified of Hit than anyone else.
"Y..yes…" He nodded.
"Well, what should I do here? He doesn't have the strength to concede, unless you want me to throw him out of the ring."
It was hard to believe, even more so to process, but Vegeta had lost. As he was taken out of the ring, he appeared to have had every last big of energy sapped from him. He had gone 110%, but even that wasn't enough compared to whatever Hit could do… or so one might think.
"He's time skipping." Jaco remarked, multiple things clicking together.
"What?" Goku blinked.
"Effectively, he's jumping ahead in time 0.1 seconds… or freezing it for that same amount of time. Allowing him to make his move. I don't think Hit's stronger than Vegeta, but Hit's smarter…"
"Isn't that cheating!?"
"Technically, the manipulation of time is a violation of Galactic Law."
"So… are you going to arrest him, or something?"
"No. I enjoy living." Jaco said with the utmost sincerity.
"And why the hell did Skorch say anything!?" Beerus scowled, but then felt something cold in his mind. Not a dark thought, but actual cold temperature, as if ice had somehow formed in- Oh. Right.
Either way, Vegeta lost. That was bad news, but when Son Goku went up against him, things got… weird.
Goku was never one known for expert strategy, or even being able to think beyond basic concepts (sure, that wasn't much of an issue most of the time, but still). But he had put together quickly how Hit was working. If he could jump 0.1 seconds into the future, then Goku just had to think 0.1 seconds faster… that wasn't a thing, but the idea behind it was. All Goku had to do was figure out where Hit would be, and then he changed his plans. It was similar to Vegeta's strategy, but rather than use an attack which covered him from all sides, Goku focused more on wearing Hit out. Shockingly, he was succeeding.
Goku sidestepped, and struck, landing another hit on the assassin from Universe Six.
"…how?! that duration was shorter than 0.1 seconds!" Hit thought, genuinely shocked by how this fight was going. Goku jumped past Super Sayian Blue and went to Super Sayian God… and was not only keeping up with hit, but moving faster than him.
"Whis. What's happening?" Beerus demanded.
"To put it simply, Hit's time-skip only works on an opponent with a power level lesser to his." Whis remarked, watching the fight. "Son Goku currently surpasses Hit's maximum power level."
"Damn I forgot how badass these fights were…" Skorch remarked, feeling better and now just chilling.
"Ture." Akira nodded.
True to the Entity's word, it became a full-on throw down. Hit and Goku stopped holding anything back, using any power, any strength, any tactic… it got so bad Goku somehow blew a hole through the shield with one of the greatest Kamehameha's he had ever used, shattering the dome surrounding the planet, threatening to suck everyone out into space. But even after all that, Goku didn't seem satisfied with something. He was giving it everything… but he needed more!
Hit gave him more.
Scrapping the Time Skip, Hit effectively broke into a back-up reserve of energy, now seeing the power that Son Goku possessed, and decided he wasn't going to fight like he had been, he was going to take this head-on. At times they moved so fast you couldn't see where they were, other times their blows created shockwaves which threatened to tear the dome apart once more. However, Goku seemed… disappointed, by something. All the while he and Hit went at ti, he could sense something else, something that Hit wasn't using. A new power? More advanced moves? Whatever it was, Goku wanted to see it!
"To think, there was someone out there in the universe like you." Hit remarked when the fight came to a lull. "I'm grateful to have you as my opponent."
"You're holding back, aren't you?" Goku asked, and Hit blinked.
"What?"
"You're an assassin, right?"
"…yes."
"Aren't there killing techniques you can't use because of the tournament rules?" Goku asked, walking backwards.
"What if there are?" Hit asked, not getting where Goku was going.
"That means you're way stronger than what I've seen! If we can't use all our moves, then neither one of us is going to our full power."
"It doesn't matter." Hit replied flatly, not seeing where the Sayian warrior was going with this.
"It does to me!" Goku exclaimed. "Listen, let's fight again some other time, somewhere else."
"DamnIjustremeberedsomethingineedtodogottagofornowbye!" Skorch said, in a borderline panic before disappearing.
"…Oh boy." Akira muttered.
"What just happened?" Champa blinked.
"What?" Whis asked, somewhat concerned by the Entity's sudden panic.
"I don't know." The Patriarch shook his head. "But if Skorch disappears like that…"
"Another time?" Hit muttered.
Then…
"Yeah." Goku nodded, and jumped off the ring.
The next five minutes were nothing but anger, screaming, and confusion. By the tournament's rules, Goku was out of bounds, meaning Hit won. With that victory, there was one final fight. Hit vs Monaka. Whoever won this won the tournament…
"I'm going to grind that flaming fucker's skull into DAMN DUST!" Beerus seethed, so pissed off at this point that he honestly felt a need to blow up a planet. He didn't care which. But he needed to destroy SOMETHING. He was flip-flopping between anger and the crushing realization that his brother was going to beat him at something…
The fight began, and the whole ring was silent. Then…
thump.
"…GAAAAHHHH!"
THOOM!
There was shocked silence, and then…
"I…I…H…Hi…Hit was… was pushed out… out of bounds! Monaka is the… the winner!" The Ref declared, shaking from what had just happened.
"THE TOURNAMENT HAS BEEN DECIDED! CHAMPION SEVEN ARE THE VICTORS!" The ref declared as Universe Seven went nuts.
"H..HOW?!" Champa roared in disbelief. "HOW DID HIT-"
"-Hit threw the match!?" Beerus realized. "WHY!?"
"If I had to guess, Lord Beerus. It had everything to do with Goku's willingness to forfeit a fight if it could not be held on an even playing field." Whis commented. "His, well, for lack of a better word, passion for fighting wouldn't allow him to fight someone who could potentially be stronger than him if they couldn't go all out."
"Huh…"
"Hell yeah!" Goku cheered. "That's how it's done!"
As Universe Seven celebrated, Universe Six fought. Champa was pissed at Hit, but the assassin couldn't care less if he was honest. Champa was also pissed at the Entity who had effectively shown up, thrown up, and bailed.
"…to destroy their world and everyone-" Champa was muttering, looking away from his brother, who seemed to be realizing something.
"C-C-Champa!" Beerus suddenly stuttered, genuine fear in his tone.
"Hit I swear, you will pay for what you've-" Champa began, but Hit simply continued to ignore him.
"C-C-CHAMPA!" Beerus shouted louder.
"Yeah! Yeah! I'll get you the damn Dragon Bal-"
"LOOK YOU IDIOT!" Beerus screamed, everyone turned to where Beerus was pointing, and Champa felt like he was going to have a heart attack when he saw who had appeared.
"Z-Z-Z-Z-ZENÔ SAMA! THE LORD OF EVERYTHING!"
"Hold on. What?!" Vegeta exclaimed in shock. "Who the heck is that?"
"The Lord of Everything is the one who rules all Twelve Universes." Whis remarked, and it felt like everyone had been punched in the gut.
"HE RULES… ALL THE UNIVERSES?!" Piccolo managed to get out. Champa and Beerus flew forward and got down on one knee, bowing their heads, which everyone else quickly followed suit out of fear. If the Gods of Destruction seemed to be panicking, this wasn't something they could just ignore.
"T..to what do we owe the great honor today…?!" Beerus managed to get out.
"Well, seeing as how you two ran off and put together this event, I figured I'd swing by and make sure shit didn't hit the fan." Zenô shrugged.
"F..forgive us, your majesty!" Champa got out.
"You… you have our sincerest apologies!"
"What? Apologize for what? This whole thing was friggin' boss!" Zenô remarked. "I was watching this, and figured we should do this again! But we need to get all twelve Universes in on it!"
Well, dear reader… that was all Goku needed to hear. In the next ten seconds, before anyone could stop him, he had agreed on behalf of Universe Seven, and Zeno seemed… pretty chill, actually. He seemed rather friendly, a massive change from the Gods of Destruction. But still, Goku didn't seem to grasp that if the GODS OF DESTRUCTION seemed to be panicking over this, maybe he should keep to the back… but if that happened, where else would this story go, I wonder?
"Yo, is the Tourney over? Cause I REALLY don't want to try and explain to Beerus what-" Skorch remarked, reappearing from a fiery vortex. He walked in front of Beerus and Champa, not seeing the Lord of everything. "Uh… I'm flattered, but I'm not that kind of God."
"Skorch. Behind you." Beerus managed to get out through gritted but somewhat chaptering teeth. Turning around, the Entity looked down at the Lord of Everything, and the Lord of Everything looked up at Skorch. It was a somewhat frightening moment, as no one knew what was going to happen…
"Huh, that explains what that power surge was…" Skorch commented. The Angels present seemed taken aback by the newcomer, and Zenô seemed to be looking at him too in curiosity. "Have we met before, Sama? 'Cause it feels like we have…"
"Y..you know him!?" Champa sputtered.
"Not personally." Skorch remarked, before bowing from the waist. "But his vibes are off the chart. This dude's got power no one in this universe has ever seen before! I'm not gonna disrespect someone with that much strength."
"You're a Watcher, right?" Zenô asked, looking at Skorch with child-like curiosity.
"Yeah." Skorch nodded. "Wait. How do you know about us? I'm the only one…"
"Funny… you look nothing like her."
"…I'm sorry. What?" Skorch blinked, the fire dying around his skull.
"I've met one of your kind, eons ago." Zenô remarked, and more than anyone, Skorch seemed taken aback in shock. "She resided over Universes Six and Seven, much like you do."
"I…what!? There was another one of us here?!" Skorch exclaimed.
"Indeed. She was a being made of some sort of gemstone. I don't remember her name though…" Zenô remarked. It was clear Skorch had so many questions, but didn't know how to ask them.
"I've never seen him so… taken aback." Goku remarked.
"This is… unusual behavior, even for Skorch." Genevieve nodded.
"I apologize for leaving so quickly, Lord Sama. But there's something I must look into. Your council is deeply appreciated." Skorch said with a deep, respectful bow before disappearing in to sparks and ashes.
"Anddddd he's gone." Beerus muttered. "The one time we actually need him…"
It was another hour or so before the Universes went their separate ways. Tensions were high until Zenô Sama had departed, as the fact that there was someone who existed across all Universes was quite a shock… Still, they were on their way home when Skorch re-appeared. Despite the questions raised, he didn't answer. It was clear this wasn't a sense of 'I can't change the future', but rather 'I don't know, and I don't like that…'
"Wait. I can go to Universe Six?" Skorch asked skeptically, messing with one of his doorways and opening a portal to Universe Six. "Awesome! I am SO fire-bombing their earth as payback for what they did to me!"
"No, you're not." Beerus said flatly. "I didn't just waste the one wish we had to bring their earth back so you could destroy it."
"Would you feel better if I let you help me firebomb it?"
"Perhaps." Beerus nodded thoughtfully.
Regardless, the Entity disappeared again, floating out in space, just… vibing.
"Ugh…. Sleep is for the weak… Let's get some reviews done! First up is one from 'The Richmaster' who wrote…
It was interesting to see the edits here as well as how the characters analysed and related each turtle with people they know
"Yeah, I needed to re-tool a LOT in that battle… but it was one of their earliest ones, so hey. Whatcha gon' do? Next is a review from 'Childhood Enigma' who wrote…
In the TMNT Death Battle. I felt just as bad for Mikey like I do for Yamcha. Always getting downsized and looked over as if everyone assumes the bad narratives about him.
"Yeah, which is why I threw in The Last Ronin, as it seems to be giving Mikey a great story. Next is from a 'Gamelover41592' who wrote…
excellent work on this chapter but why are you doing Blanka and Pikachu next instead of the sequel to this death battle?
"Eh. Not a Battletoads fan, also thought that whole episode was… bleh. I'll probably ge tot it someday. Next is one from 'Blue Chaos' who wrote…
Can you do vs next please
"….I have no idea what you're asking for. Next, is one from a 'Marx', who wrote…
I know what's going on here. Some jerk-off decided to indulge themselves in an egoholic binge and now we have this freaking mess that is the "Universal Tournament" of egos.
Please tell me that none of what I said is true at all or forever hold your peace.
"Damn. There's a lotta salt there, dude. First up, thanks for the review, this is probably one of like, ten genuinely negative reviews telling me to piss off and what not I've gotten in two years. Second, if ya don't like it, I ain't makin' you read it. Third, if you've got issues with what I'm doing, I'll say it again, LET. ME. KNOW. There're some things I ain't gonna stop doing, and if that's an issue, I'm sorry. I ain't mad dude, but I'd like to know what's gotten you upset so I can try and avoid doing that id possible in the future. We cool? Great. Finally, there's one from 'saotshy12' who wrote…
You should make the next battle Naruto Vs Ichigo two children of Goku.
Goku is after all the template for almost all heroes that followed him.
Just think of Chi-Chi face of Naruto past and all that. Then her thinking how family dinner would be with all the children.
Or Ace Vs Natsu.
"Oh, geez! I gotta make sure she's there when that happens! That reaction is gonna be LEGENDARY!" The Entity laughed, and disappeared, re-appearing on the ship and kicking back to enjoy the flight, a massive weight off of Skorch's shoulders now that the tournament was done. The next big pressure? Figure out what they were gonna do to celebrate!
Now, with Universe Six was resored and the fighters heading home, things were finally calm… until Yamcha hit 'Play' to continue to the preview for the next Death Battle. It was silent, then a tape player appeared.
Hey, yeah, I wanna shoop, baby~! Shoop shoop ba-doop shoop ba-doop
Shoop ba-doop ba-doop, ba-doop.
An upbeat song kept playing as a figure in an entirely red costume, kinda like Spider-Man's was sitting on a bridge overlooking a highway.
Umm, you're packed and you're stacked 'specially in the back Brother, wanna thank your mother for a butt like that (thanks, Mom). Can I get some fries with that shake-shake boobie? If looks could kill you would be an uzi-
"That's really catchy." Goku remarked, listening to the song.
"-You're a shotgun, bang! What's up with that thang?" The costumed man was singing before stopping and looking directly at those watching. "Oh… Wait. Is it my time?! Hell yeah! Yo, Skorch! Let's do this man!"
"NO!" Skorch yelled.
"Aw… don't be that way Skorchy… see you all soon Z-Crew! Also, if you wanna see the Angel of the Morning Intro next chapter, vote in the poll!"
Note: The author does not hate watermelon. I actually really like it. Watermelon was mentioned in a throwaway line in the manga, and I figured screw it. It'd be funny.
But what Skorch said stands, the timeline is different now… how is this gonna affect things? Well… can someone say gender bent Highschool AU FriezaXVegeta slash fic?
Because I can't.